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I sent these to a fellow joke lover on this site but I thought I'd share them with you all today as well.
A man walks into a library and asks if they have any books about paranoia. The librarian says "look out, they're right behind you!"
Last week, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick and I passed her a glue stick instead. She still isn't talking to me.
My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo. So I put my foot down.
I got hungry yesterday and ate a clock. It was very time consuming.
Where do you find a cow with no legs? Right where you left it, that's where.
Just as we suspected, someone has been adding soil to our garden. And so the plot thickens.
Last year, I wrote a book on reverse psychology. Whatever you do, do not read it.
A man walks into a library and asks if they have any books about paranoia. The librarian says "look out, they're right behind you!"
Last week, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick and I passed her a glue stick instead. She still isn't talking to me.
My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo. So I put my foot down.
I got hungry yesterday and ate a clock. It was very time consuming.
Where do you find a cow with no legs? Right where you left it, that's where.
Just as we suspected, someone has been adding soil to our garden. And so the plot thickens.
Last year, I wrote a book on reverse psychology. Whatever you do, do not read it.