Help/Advice for introductions

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Graham18

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"Thank you! I'm glad you helped clear up some of my fears of aggression." - You are welcome. I am so glad that I could maybe explain the actions better to allow them to be interpreted.

" I never intended to actually get him going for her on video but I'm glad I did." - Agreed, sometimes we get lucky.

"Just a quick update or lack of update I should say." - Hahahaha, ok

" Sapphire has been coming to the stairs almost every morning and evening now." - GREAT!!!!

"She doesn't have the courage or desire at least to come down the stairs " - Not yet ;)

"but she will come sit at the top for a few minutes, watch Fluffy, and then go back to bed." - Great. How is her body language when she goes back to bed?

"One night she was already downstairs on her cat tree and she calmly watched Fluffy eat before jumping down and going up to nap." - TERRIFIC!! How was her body language as she went to nap?

"Fluffy gets SO excited when he sees her." - Awwwww, I know. :/ He so wants to be close to her.

" His tail shoots straight up into the air" - Tail straight up is confidence.

" and he starts meowing like crazy." - Awwwwwwwww

" He will either come and sit at the foot of the stairs with me and they watch eachother, or he will sit in the living room and they watch eachother from there." - Awwwwww, he wants a sign from her

" I've had a bit of luck getting him to play when she's on the stairs," - GREAT!!!! How does she react?

" but he really likes to play in the cat tunnel on the floor and the loud crinkling sound it makes when he runs through tends to scare Sapphire." - Yep and the "ambush" aspect of it.

"Although it's unrelated, I've noticed Fluffy is now much more playful in the morning and less at night." - Interesting

" It does make it a bit difficult to tire him out but so far doesn't seem to be causing problems. " - Yes, though he is probably tough to tire him out otherwise as well. :/ Great it is not causing problems.

Another great update. I love it. Keep doing what you are doing and just act normal around them. It is working!!! :)
I'm sorry I forgot to answer your question. Sapphire is completely normal when she's in her bed. Doesn't look scared at all. Sometimes I think she looks sad but that's just probably me overthinking. Usually she's either curled up or laying down with her paws hanging over the edge, grooming herself or looking out the window.

All is still going the same as before. Sapphire will the odd time come to the top of the stairs but typically that's as far as she goes. Once she came down and stuck her head through the bannister while Fluffy was off at another part of the house but started to panic hiss and growl when he got close and he got into his sneaky playful stance and started towards her pretty fast.

I'd say that when Fluffy is out and about downstairs, Sapphire is spending around 95% of the time upstairs. I do believe that he is the reason and she would rather just not get involved (vs actually being scared) since she'll usually come down once she knows he's not there, but we will see.

Here is a picture of sapphire peaking to watch him.
20220225_200304.jpg
 

calicosrspecial

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I'm sorry I forgot to answer your question. Sapphire is completely normal when she's in her bed. Doesn't look scared at all. Sometimes I think she looks sad but that's just probably me overthinking. Usually she's either curled up or laying down with her paws hanging over the edge, grooming herself or looking out the window.

All is still going the same as before. Sapphire will the odd time come to the top of the stairs but typically that's as far as she goes. Once she came down and stuck her head through the bannister while Fluffy was off at another part of the house but started to panic hiss and growl when he got close and he got into his sneaky playful stance and started towards her pretty fast.

I'd say that when Fluffy is out and about downstairs, Sapphire is spending around 95% of the time upstairs. I do believe that he is the reason and she would rather just not get involved (vs actually being scared) since she'll usually come down once she knows he's not there, but we will see.

Here is a picture of sapphire peaking to watch him.
View attachment 412293
She is SO CUTE!!! I do want her to get more confident to go down and be like "I own this with you!!!"

"I'm sorry I forgot to answer your question." - That is ok. :)

" Sapphire is completely normal when she's in her bed. Doesn't look scared at all." - Great!!! I figured but great to read.

" Sometimes I think she looks sad but that's just probably me overthinking." - Yes, it is hard to tell. Just watch the actions to understand the level of confidence.

" Usually she's either curled up or laying down with her paws hanging over the edge, grooming herself or looking out the window." - Awwwwwwww. Grooming is usually positive and looking out the window is great. As is curling up and having the paws over.

"All is still going the same as before." - Great, as that happens every day builds more trust and confidence.

" Sapphire will the odd time come to the top of the stairs but typically that's as far as she goes." - Ok. She'll get the courage to come down if the reward outweighs the concern.

" Once she came down and stuck her head through the bannister while Fluffy was off at another part of the house" - Awwwwwwwwww

" but started to panic hiss and growl when he got close and he got into his sneaky playful stance and started towards her pretty fast." - Ok. As long as nothing bad happened it will build trust and confidence in time.

"I'd say that when Fluffy is out and about downstairs, Sapphire is spending around 95% of the time upstairs. " - Ok, hopefully we see more balance in that in time.

"I do believe that he is the reason and she would rather just not get involved (vs actually being scared)" - Yes, agreed. We just need to let her go at her pace and get to the point that the reward is greater than any concern. I do think she had trauma before she came to you. :(

"since she'll usually come down once she knows he's not there," - Yes

Keep trying to build that confidence when you get more time with a to of play and those positive associations, positive encounters.

" but we will see. " - She will get there just when is the question. Just keep doing what you are doing and it is in her hands so we'll go at her pace. She'll get to the point that the reward of being downstairs will outweigh her perceived fears. She will get there.
 
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She is SO CUTE!!! I do want her to get more confident to go down and be like "I own this with you!!!"

"I'm sorry I forgot to answer your question." - That is ok. :)

" Sapphire is completely normal when she's in her bed. Doesn't look scared at all." - Great!!! I figured but great to read.

" Sometimes I think she looks sad but that's just probably me overthinking." - Yes, it is hard to tell. Just watch the actions to understand the level of confidence.

" Usually she's either curled up or laying down with her paws hanging over the edge, grooming herself or looking out the window." - Awwwwwwww. Grooming is usually positive and looking out the window is great. As is curling up and having the paws over.

"All is still going the same as before." - Great, as that happens every day builds more trust and confidence.

" Sapphire will the odd time come to the top of the stairs but typically that's as far as she goes." - Ok. She'll get the courage to come down if the reward outweighs the concern.

" Once she came down and stuck her head through the bannister while Fluffy was off at another part of the house" - Awwwwwwwwww

" but started to panic hiss and growl when he got close and he got into his sneaky playful stance and started towards her pretty fast." - Ok. As long as nothing bad happened it will build trust and confidence in time.

"I'd say that when Fluffy is out and about downstairs, Sapphire is spending around 95% of the time upstairs. " - Ok, hopefully we see more balance in that in time.

"I do believe that he is the reason and she would rather just not get involved (vs actually being scared)" - Yes, agreed. We just need to let her go at her pace and get to the point that the reward is greater than any concern. I do think she had trauma before she came to you. :(

"since she'll usually come down once she knows he's not there," - Yes

Keep trying to build that confidence when you get more time with a to of play and those positive associations, positive encounters.

" but we will see. " - She will get there just when is the question. Just keep doing what you are doing and it is in her hands so we'll go at her pace. She'll get to the point that the reward of being downstairs will outweigh her perceived fears. She will get there.
I managed to take a picture of sapphire in her bed while Fluffy was out and about downstairs which I will post at the bottom. I'm also working on her confidence although generally she seems very confident when she's without Fluffy. Play is still a bit difficult with her so I'm trying to give her treats, mouse shaped treat dispensers hidden about, etc.

I brought Fluffy upstairs to see her one night since she hasn't come downstairs at all this week yet and she was perfectly fine. She even jumped off the dresser where her bed is down to the floor without having to coax her down. They had some treats and Fluffy got to see his sister and that was that.

Last night, the stray cat came by again while I was playing with Fluffy downstairs. Fluffy saw it and was not happy. Puffed up fur, hissing, growling, etc. I managed to distract him and calm him down fairly quickly but he was very intent on running from window to window after that. What I noticed was completely different than when he sees sapphire which does reinforce to me that he doesn't have aggressive intent with her and I'd have to be more worried about play escalating. The only two similarities I noticed were in Fluffy's tail thrashing back and forth as he does when he sees sapphire and once he had calmed a bit he was making the same sort of huffing and puffing sound he makes when he wants to see her but that was it.

And here is the picture I took of sapphire while Fluffy was downstairs.
20220301_205630.jpg
 

calicosrspecial

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I managed to take a picture of sapphire in her bed while Fluffy was out and about downstairs which I will post at the bottom. I'm also working on her confidence although generally she seems very confident when she's without Fluffy. Play is still a bit difficult with her so I'm trying to give her treats, mouse shaped treat dispensers hidden about, etc.

I brought Fluffy upstairs to see her one night since she hasn't come downstairs at all this week yet and she was perfectly fine. She even jumped off the dresser where her bed is down to the floor without having to coax her down. They had some treats and Fluffy got to see his sister and that was that.

Last night, the stray cat came by again while I was playing with Fluffy downstairs. Fluffy saw it and was not happy. Puffed up fur, hissing, growling, etc. I managed to distract him and calm him down fairly quickly but he was very intent on running from window to window after that. What I noticed was completely different than when he sees sapphire which does reinforce to me that he doesn't have aggressive intent with her and I'd have to be more worried about play escalating. The only two similarities I noticed were in Fluffy's tail thrashing back and forth as he does when he sees sapphire and once he had calmed a bit he was making the same sort of huffing and puffing sound he makes when he wants to see her but that was it.

And here is the picture I took of sapphire while Fluffy was downstairs.
View attachment 412439
I just LOVE Sapphire. What a GORGEOUS kitty!!!

"I managed to take a picture of sapphire in her bed while Fluffy was out and about downstairs which I will post at the bottom." - She looks fantastic. Relaxed, curious, gorgeous.

" I'm also working on her confidence" - Great

" although generally she seems very confident when she's without Fluffy." - Great

" Play is still a bit difficult with her so I'm trying to give her treats, mouse shaped treat dispensers hidden about, etc." - Great

"I brought Fluffy upstairs to see her one night since she hasn't come downstairs at all this week yet and she was perfectly fine." - Great. Do you get any sense there is anything "different" with her? Hopefully she comes down at some point.

" She even jumped off the dresser where her bed is down to the floor without having to coax her down. They had some treats and Fluffy got to see his sister and that was that." - GREAT!!!!

"Last night, the stray cat came by again while I was playing with Fluffy downstairs. Fluffy saw it and was not happy. Puffed up fur, hissing, growling, etc." - Yep. :/

" I managed to distract him and calm him down fairly quickly " - Great

"but he was very intent on running from window to window after that." - Yes, defending his territory.

" What I noticed was completely different than when he sees sapphire which does reinforce to me that he doesn't have aggressive intent with her" - Great

" and I'd have to be more worried about play escalating." - Yes

" The only two similarities I noticed were in Fluffy's tail thrashing back and forth as he does when he sees sapphire and once he had calmed a bit he was making the same sort of huffing and puffing sound he makes when he wants to see her but that was it." - Ok. The tail movement can be excitement, anxiety etc so other actions help clarify what it is. Same with the huffing and puffing.

"And here is the picture I took of sapphire while Fluffy was downstairs. " - She looks great AND GORGEOUS!!!

I would like to see her come downstairs at some point. Hopefully. I do wonder if she saw the feral before her staying upstairs. :/

Sounds really good overall though. Keep up the great work!!
 
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I just LOVE Sapphire. What a GORGEOUS kitty!!!

"I managed to take a picture of sapphire in her bed while Fluffy was out and about downstairs which I will post at the bottom." - She looks fantastic. Relaxed, curious, gorgeous.

" I'm also working on her confidence" - Great

" although generally she seems very confident when she's without Fluffy." - Great

" Play is still a bit difficult with her so I'm trying to give her treats, mouse shaped treat dispensers hidden about, etc." - Great

"I brought Fluffy upstairs to see her one night since she hasn't come downstairs at all this week yet and she was perfectly fine." - Great. Do you get any sense there is anything "different" with her? Hopefully she comes down at some point.

" She even jumped off the dresser where her bed is down to the floor without having to coax her down. They had some treats and Fluffy got to see his sister and that was that." - GREAT!!!!

"Last night, the stray cat came by again while I was playing with Fluffy downstairs. Fluffy saw it and was not happy. Puffed up fur, hissing, growling, etc." - Yep. :/

" I managed to distract him and calm him down fairly quickly " - Great

"but he was very intent on running from window to window after that." - Yes, defending his territory.

" What I noticed was completely different than when he sees sapphire which does reinforce to me that he doesn't have aggressive intent with her" - Great

" and I'd have to be more worried about play escalating." - Yes

" The only two similarities I noticed were in Fluffy's tail thrashing back and forth as he does when he sees sapphire and once he had calmed a bit he was making the same sort of huffing and puffing sound he makes when he wants to see her but that was it." - Ok. The tail movement can be excitement, anxiety etc so other actions help clarify what it is. Same with the huffing and puffing.

"And here is the picture I took of sapphire while Fluffy was downstairs. " - She looks great AND GORGEOUS!!!

I would like to see her come downstairs at some point. Hopefully. I do wonder if she saw the feral before her staying upstairs. :/

Sounds really good overall though. Keep up the great work!!
I think that she is kind of just doing whatever she feels like doing and generally I don't think there's any issues except a bit of caution still which is completely warranted as Fluffy would most definitely still chase her and try and pounce on her.

Last night I think I started to see a bit more bravery on her part. She came to the top of the stairs as usual so I gave them some treats and then started playing with Fluffy with a wand toy and I managed to coax him up to the window perch with the toy. He decided to lay there for a bit while I was sitting on the couch. Not paying attention I looked back to the stairs and Sapphire wasn't there so I had assumed she went upstairs. A few minutes later I looked over and realized she hadn't gone upstairs and had actually come down and was laying on her cat tree watching me. She wouldn't have been able to see Fluffy but obviously knew he was there and he I don't believe had any idea she was there.

I say that I don't believe Fluffy knew she was there as when he jumped off the couch and went towards where his treats were he also didn't seem to notice her for another minute or so but when he finally did the chirping and tail thrashing started.

When she finally came down I told Fluffy No as he was starting to look like he was going to take a run at her as she walked to the stairs. She ended up just sitting at the bottom of the stairs clearly interested but also ready to run if Fluffy came for her. She made a high pitched meow at one point which got Fluffy super worked up and he started to "play attack" my arm and hand. I got him ready for bed after that since he was worked up and I didn't want to risk an altercation.
 

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I think that she is kind of just doing whatever she feels like doing and generally I don't think there's any issues except a bit of caution still which is completely warranted as Fluffy would most definitely still chase her and try and pounce on her.

Last night I think I started to see a bit more bravery on her part. She came to the top of the stairs as usual so I gave them some treats and then started playing with Fluffy with a wand toy and I managed to coax him up to the window perch with the toy. He decided to lay there for a bit while I was sitting on the couch. Not paying attention I looked back to the stairs and Sapphire wasn't there so I had assumed she went upstairs. A few minutes later I looked over and realized she hadn't gone upstairs and had actually come down and was laying on her cat tree watching me. She wouldn't have been able to see Fluffy but obviously knew he was there and he I don't believe had any idea she was there.

I say that I don't believe Fluffy knew she was there as when he jumped off the couch and went towards where his treats were he also didn't seem to notice her for another minute or so but when he finally did the chirping and tail thrashing started.

When she finally came down I told Fluffy No as he was starting to look like he was going to take a run at her as she walked to the stairs. She ended up just sitting at the bottom of the stairs clearly interested but also ready to run if Fluffy came for her. She made a high pitched meow at one point which got Fluffy super worked up and he started to "play attack" my arm and hand. I got him ready for bed after that since he was worked up and I didn't want to risk an altercation.
"I think that she is kind of just doing whatever she feels like doing and generally I don't think there's any issues except a bit of caution still which is completely warranted as Fluffy would most definitely still chase her and try and pounce on her." - Ok. Undestandable but VERY good!!!

"Last night I think I started to see a bit more bravery on her part." - GREAT!!!

" She came to the top of the stairs as usual so I gave them some treats and then started playing with Fluffy with a wand toy and I managed to coax him up to the window perch with the toy. He decided to lay there for a bit while I was sitting on the couch. Not paying attention I looked back to the stairs and Sapphire wasn't there so I had assumed she went upstairs. A few minutes later I looked over and realized she hadn't gone upstairs and had actually come down and was laying on her cat tree watching me." - WOW!!! GREAT JOB!!!! That should be REALLY HELPFUL for her!! GREAT JOB!!!

" She wouldn't have been able to see Fluffy but obviously knew he was there " - Yes, she knew

"and he I don't believe had any idea she was there." - Maybe

"I say that I don't believe Fluffy knew she was there as when he jumped off the couch and went towards where his treats were he also didn't seem to notice her for another minute or so but when he finally did the chirping and tail thrashing started." - Awwwwwww, ok.

"When she finally came down I told Fluffy No" - Great job!!!

" as he was starting to look like he was going to take a run at her as she walked to the stairs." - Yes, :)

" She ended up just sitting at the bottom of the stairs clearly interested but also ready to run if Fluffy came for her." - GREAT!!!

" She made a high pitched meow at one point which got Fluffy super worked up " - Yes. Do you think she wanted to play? To get him a bit wild?

" and he started to "play attack" my arm and hand." - Yes :(

" I got him ready for bed after that since he was worked up and I didn't want to risk an altercation." - Great job!!

That sounds AMAZING!!!! More progress!!! GREAT JOB!!! I am SO PROUD of you all!!! :)
 
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"I think that she is kind of just doing whatever she feels like doing and generally I don't think there's any issues except a bit of caution still which is completely warranted as Fluffy would most definitely still chase her and try and pounce on her." - Ok. Undestandable but VERY good!!!

"Last night I think I started to see a bit more bravery on her part." - GREAT!!!

" She came to the top of the stairs as usual so I gave them some treats and then started playing with Fluffy with a wand toy and I managed to coax him up to the window perch with the toy. He decided to lay there for a bit while I was sitting on the couch. Not paying attention I looked back to the stairs and Sapphire wasn't there so I had assumed she went upstairs. A few minutes later I looked over and realized she hadn't gone upstairs and had actually come down and was laying on her cat tree watching me." - WOW!!! GREAT JOB!!!! That should be REALLY HELPFUL for her!! GREAT JOB!!!

" She wouldn't have been able to see Fluffy but obviously knew he was there " - Yes, she knew

"and he I don't believe had any idea she was there." - Maybe

"I say that I don't believe Fluffy knew she was there as when he jumped off the couch and went towards where his treats were he also didn't seem to notice her for another minute or so but when he finally did the chirping and tail thrashing started." - Awwwwwww, ok.

"When she finally came down I told Fluffy No" - Great job!!!

" as he was starting to look like he was going to take a run at her as she walked to the stairs." - Yes, :)

" She ended up just sitting at the bottom of the stairs clearly interested but also ready to run if Fluffy came for her." - GREAT!!!

" She made a high pitched meow at one point which got Fluffy super worked up " - Yes. Do you think she wanted to play? To get him a bit wild?

" and he started to "play attack" my arm and hand." - Yes :(

" I got him ready for bed after that since he was worked up and I didn't want to risk an altercation." - Great job!!

That sounds AMAZING!!!! More progress!!! GREAT JOB!!! I am SO PROUD of you all!!! :)
The meow she did was definitely my fault. I went to give her a treat and I guess she thought I was going to pet her and the meow was telling me not to pet her.

She also stayed downstairs most of last night too, mostly on her cat tree relaxing. Very briefly a few times I was able to get Fluffy to chill out and relax on the window perch as well, but he mostly wanted to be near her as usual haha. When she would get a bit scared or worried, she would just go sit on the stairs or go upstairs and be back a few minutes later.

Fluffy is slowly getting better at somewhat ignoring her but we aren't there yet.
 

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The meow she did was definitely my fault. I went to give her a treat and I guess she thought I was going to pet her and the meow was telling me not to pet her.

She also stayed downstairs most of last night too, mostly on her cat tree relaxing. Very briefly a few times I was able to get Fluffy to chill out and relax on the window perch as well, but he mostly wanted to be near her as usual haha. When she would get a bit scared or worried, she would just go sit on the stairs or go upstairs and be back a few minutes later.

Fluffy is slowly getting better at somewhat ignoring her but we aren't there yet.
"The meow she did was definitely my fault. I went to give her a treat and I guess she thought I was going to pet her and the meow was telling me not to pet her." - Ok. I would not say it was "your fault". I know what you mean but it is not a big deal and really nothing.

"She also stayed downstairs most of last night too, mostly on her cat tree relaxing." - WOW!!!! :yess: :hyper: :clap2: FANTASTIC!!!

" Very briefly a few times I was able to get Fluffy to chill out and relax on the window perch as well," - GREAT and GREAT job!!!

"but he mostly wanted to be near her as usual haha." - OF COURSE!!! But THAT is a great sign!!! Since he wants to be friends and play.

" When she would get a bit scared or worried, she would just go sit on the stairs or go upstairs and be back a few minutes later." - AMAZING. Progress!!! And that helps build her trust and confidence as it happens

"Fluffy is slowly getting better at somewhat ignoring her but we aren't there yet." - But we are getting there!!! He is doing great as are you and Sapphire!!!

Keep up the great work. It is working!!
 
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Sapphire has been coming downstairs more and more now. Either she just comes to the stairs or in some cases she'll come all the way down and go on the cat tree (only if she has a clear path to it and Fluffy isn't paying attention). She still acts quite reserved but she's getting better.

I can tell she's pretty confort with a barrier as she'll walk right up to Fluffy if he's behind a gate and sniff him. Less so with the bannisters on the stairs where they have gotten into some pawing and Sapphire will still hiss and growl at him.

Fluffy is still quite a handful most of the time but I've had some luck getting him to play and/or ignore her when she's laying on the cat tree. Other times he's just completely focused on her and the closer he gets to her, the more he gets into his pouncing stance and needs to be redirected.

Just a small update :)
 

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Sapphire has been coming downstairs more and more now. Either she just comes to the stairs or in some cases she'll come all the way down and go on the cat tree (only if she has a clear path to it and Fluffy isn't paying attention). She still acts quite reserved but she's getting better.

I can tell she's pretty confort with a barrier as she'll walk right up to Fluffy if he's behind a gate and sniff him. Less so with the bannisters on the stairs where they have gotten into some pawing and Sapphire will still hiss and growl at him.

Fluffy is still quite a handful most of the time but I've had some luck getting him to play and/or ignore her when she's laying on the cat tree. Other times he's just completely focused on her and the closer he gets to her, the more he gets into his pouncing stance and needs to be redirected.

Just a small update :)
"Sapphire has been coming downstairs more and more now." - :yess: :hyper: :clap2:

" Either she just comes to the stairs or in some cases she'll come all the way down and go on the cat tree (only if she has a clear path to it and Fluffy isn't paying attention). She still acts quite reserved but she's getting better." - WOW!!! This is SUCH A GREAT UPDATE!!! This is HUGE PROGRESS!!!

"I can tell she's pretty confort with a barrier as she'll walk right up to Fluffy if he's behind a gate and sniff him." - Great!!!

" Less so with the bannisters on the stairs where they have gotten into some pawing and Sapphire will still hiss and growl at him." -= Yes but as long as nothing negative happens it will build her confidence with him.

"Fluffy is still quite a handful most of the time" - Hahahaha, yep. :/

" but I've had some luck getting him to play and/or ignore her when she's laying on the cat tree." - WOW!! GREAT job!!!

" Other times he's just completely focused on her and the closer he gets to her, the more he gets into his pouncing stance and needs to be redirected." - Yes, he so wants to play. :/ Poor guy. There is nothing better than another cat to play with!!!

"Just a small update :) " - Hahahaha, yes, small ;) This is EXACTLY what I have been looking for. We are getting there!!! GREAT JOB!!! :clap2::cheerleader:
 
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"Sapphire has been coming downstairs more and more now." - :yess: :hyper: :clap2:

" Either she just comes to the stairs or in some cases she'll come all the way down and go on the cat tree (only if she has a clear path to it and Fluffy isn't paying attention). She still acts quite reserved but she's getting better." - WOW!!! This is SUCH A GREAT UPDATE!!! This is HUGE PROGRESS!!!

"I can tell she's pretty confort with a barrier as she'll walk right up to Fluffy if he's behind a gate and sniff him." - Great!!!

" Less so with the bannisters on the stairs where they have gotten into some pawing and Sapphire will still hiss and growl at him." -= Yes but as long as nothing negative happens it will build her confidence with him.

"Fluffy is still quite a handful most of the time" - Hahahaha, yep. :/

" but I've had some luck getting him to play and/or ignore her when she's laying on the cat tree." - WOW!! GREAT job!!!

" Other times he's just completely focused on her and the closer he gets to her, the more he gets into his pouncing stance and needs to be redirected." - Yes, he so wants to play. :/ Poor guy. There is nothing better than another cat to play with!!!

"Just a small update :) " - Hahahaha, yes, small ;) This is EXACTLY what I have been looking for. We are getting there!!! GREAT JOB!!! :clap2::cheerleader:
I wish I had something new and exciting to update but it's been the same old same old.
I'm hoping that I'm getting an understanding better of Sapphire but I think I still have a lot to figure out.
She definitely feels more comfortable still when she's behind a barrier from Fluffy. She'll gladly sit and watch him and even come up and sniff him and they'll paw a little bit. When he's out and about she is still coming to the top of the stairs at least every day a few times and still all the way down sometimes. Last night she was especially brave and while Fluffy was distracted at the window, she came all the way down and into the dining room and then just sat under the table. She still growls at him quite a lot downstairs especially as he gets closer to her, and usually at that point she will seize the opportunity to go back upstairs.

I do somewhat feel bad for her as she does seem to want to come down and be with me but is simply too worried about fluffy so I try my best to stay near her or give her attention while keeping Fluffy busy.

Fluffy hasn't changed too much haha. He's still really adamant about going to see her when she's downstairs which triggers her growling. If he is on the couch looking outside and she comes to the stairs he will usually just watch her and meow but stay on the couch until she comes further down.

As I said nothing new or major to update. I apologize if I'm posting too much even when nothing is happening. It really just helps to make me feel better about how things are going.

Here are just a few random pictures
20220309_192322.jpg


20220309_195152.jpg

20220309_195307.jpg
 

rubysmama

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Sorry I've not replied lately, but I am still following Sapphire and Fluffy's progress. :catlove:

I apologize if I'm posting too much even when nothing is happening. It really just helps to make me feel better about how things are going.
No worries. This is your thread, so you can post as often as you want. 🤗
 

calicosrspecial

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I wish I had something new and exciting to update but it's been the same old same old.
I'm hoping that I'm getting an understanding better of Sapphire but I think I still have a lot to figure out.
She definitely feels more comfortable still when she's behind a barrier from Fluffy. She'll gladly sit and watch him and even come up and sniff him and they'll paw a little bit. When he's out and about she is still coming to the top of the stairs at least every day a few times and still all the way down sometimes. Last night she was especially brave and while Fluffy was distracted at the window, she came all the way down and into the dining room and then just sat under the table. She still growls at him quite a lot downstairs especially as he gets closer to her, and usually at that point she will seize the opportunity to go back upstairs.

I do somewhat feel bad for her as she does seem to want to come down and be with me but is simply too worried about fluffy so I try my best to stay near her or give her attention while keeping Fluffy busy.

Fluffy hasn't changed too much haha. He's still really adamant about going to see her when she's downstairs which triggers her growling. If he is on the couch looking outside and she comes to the stairs he will usually just watch her and meow but stay on the couch until she comes further down.

As I said nothing new or major to update. I apologize if I'm posting too much even when nothing is happening. It really just helps to make me feel better about how things are going.

Here are just a few random pictures
View attachment 413280

View attachment 413281
View attachment 413282
My goodness is Sapphire ADORABLY GORGEOUS or what?!?!?!?!?!?!? LOVE the pictures!!!

"I wish I had something new and exciting to update but it's been the same old same old." - Well, "same old same old" is just fine. Any time we avoid negatives it is positive and builds trust and confidence.

"I'm hoping that I'm getting an understanding better of Sapphire but I think I still have a lot to figure out." - Don't we all about all cats???? ;) I think we do understand her pretty well. She probably had a traumatic moment in her past. So she is really fearful, insecure. BUT she is a great cat and will get better over time. I see cats like Sapphire all the time. She is not at all uncommon.

"She definitely feels more comfortable still when she's behind a barrier from Fluffy." - Yes. BUT it is great she does feel more confident with that. IF she can with a barrier she will without in time.

" She'll gladly sit and watch him and even come up and sniff him and they'll paw a little bit." - Awwwwwwwww. It depends on the pawing but sound pretty good.

" When he's out and about she is still coming to the top of the stairs at least every day a few times and still all the way down sometimes." - GREAT!!!!

" Last night she was especially brave and while Fluffy was distracted at the window, she came all the way down and into the dining room and then just sat under the table." - WOW!!!! THAT is EXACTLY what we want to see. And if it stays positive it will give hr more confidence.

" She still growls at him quite a lot downstairs especially as he gets closer to her," - Totally fine and not at all an issue.

" and usually at that point she will seize the opportunity to go back upstairs." - Yes. But as long as he doesn't chase her, intimidate her etc then it will build confidence over time.

"I do somewhat feel bad for her as she does seem to want to come down and be with me" - I know but try your best not to feel that way and feel confident. She will absorb and mirror your confidence.

" but is simply too worried about fluffy" - Yes, for now

"so I try my best to stay near her or give her attention while keeping Fluffy busy." - GREAT!!!! And act aloof, that all is well, not a big deal, etc.

"Fluffy hasn't changed too much haha." - Boys!!!!

" He's still really adamant about going to see her when she's downstairs which triggers her growling." - Yes, he wants to play with his sister. :/

" If he is on the couch looking outside and she comes to the stairs he will usually just watch her and meow but stay on the couch until she comes further down." - WOW!!!! That is GREAT progress!!! Probably part of the reason why she is getting more brave.

"As I said nothing new or major to update." - Hmmmmmm, I would say there was nice progress in here.

" I apologize if I'm posting too much even when nothing is happening. It really just helps to make me feel better about how things are going. " - Oh my goodness. You are ABSOLUTELY NOT posting too much. AND there is information here that helps clarify the picture. You are my eyes and ears so any info can be really helpful (in either way). If there are negatives we can deal with them and if it is positive it helps us understand what is working. Post anytime!!! :)

I should add, Sapphire's body language looks great in the pictures as well!!! She is definitely making progress!!! :clap2:
 
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My goodness is Sapphire ADORABLY GORGEOUS or what?!?!?!?!?!?!? LOVE the pictures!!!

"I wish I had something new and exciting to update but it's been the same old same old." - Well, "same old same old" is just fine. Any time we avoid negatives it is positive and builds trust and confidence.

"I'm hoping that I'm getting an understanding better of Sapphire but I think I still have a lot to figure out." - Don't we all about all cats???? ;) I think we do understand her pretty well. She probably had a traumatic moment in her past. So she is really fearful, insecure. BUT she is a great cat and will get better over time. I see cats like Sapphire all the time. She is not at all uncommon.

"She definitely feels more comfortable still when she's behind a barrier from Fluffy." - Yes. BUT it is great she does feel more confident with that. IF she can with a barrier she will without in time.

" She'll gladly sit and watch him and even come up and sniff him and they'll paw a little bit." - Awwwwwwwww. It depends on the pawing but sound pretty good.

" When he's out and about she is still coming to the top of the stairs at least every day a few times and still all the way down sometimes." - GREAT!!!!

" Last night she was especially brave and while Fluffy was distracted at the window, she came all the way down and into the dining room and then just sat under the table." - WOW!!!! THAT is EXACTLY what we want to see. And if it stays positive it will give hr more confidence.

" She still growls at him quite a lot downstairs especially as he gets closer to her," - Totally fine and not at all an issue.

" and usually at that point she will seize the opportunity to go back upstairs." - Yes. But as long as he doesn't chase her, intimidate her etc then it will build confidence over time.

"I do somewhat feel bad for her as she does seem to want to come down and be with me" - I know but try your best not to feel that way and feel confident. She will absorb and mirror your confidence.

" but is simply too worried about fluffy" - Yes, for now

"so I try my best to stay near her or give her attention while keeping Fluffy busy." - GREAT!!!! And act aloof, that all is well, not a big deal, etc.

"Fluffy hasn't changed too much haha." - Boys!!!!

" He's still really adamant about going to see her when she's downstairs which triggers her growling." - Yes, he wants to play with his sister. :/

" If he is on the couch looking outside and she comes to the stairs he will usually just watch her and meow but stay on the couch until she comes further down." - WOW!!!! That is GREAT progress!!! Probably part of the reason why she is getting more brave.

"As I said nothing new or major to update." - Hmmmmmm, I would say there was nice progress in here.

" I apologize if I'm posting too much even when nothing is happening. It really just helps to make me feel better about how things are going. " - Oh my goodness. You are ABSOLUTELY NOT posting too much. AND there is information here that helps clarify the picture. You are my eyes and ears so any info can be really helpful (in either way). If there are negatives we can deal with them and if it is positive it helps us understand what is working. Post anytime!!! :)

I should add, Sapphire's body language looks great in the pictures as well!!! She is definitely making progress!!! :clap2:
Thank you :) I'll continue to provide small updates as I can. I suppose small details can help!

Tonight was pretty normal and straight forward. Fluffy typically doesn't want to stay upstairs and play anymore so I usually bring him downstairs shortly after dinner so he has about an hour out and about with me before bed. Sapphire was her usual self coming to the top of the stairs and just watching. Tonight Fluffy was obsessed with a tin foil ball and Sapphire watched while he chased it around. While Fluffy was playing or taking a break and just laying down, I would go try and pet Sapphire and as soon as I'd pet her she would run back upstairs. The odd time before running off she would make an almost trilling sound similar to when she sees birds but not quite (I used to and still think it's her annoyed sound however I'm not sure anymore).

Right towards putting Fluffy to bed, while he was looking out the window she came all the way downstairs, and he, of course jumped off the couch. As I had him distracted with a treat she walked towards the couch and behind the coffee table just to watch. Fluffy was quite excited desperately trying to sneak around me to get to her and I could tell he was getting ready to pounce/chase so I brought him to his room with treats and put him to bed.

Afterwards, sapphire jumped right up on the window perch and is relaxing there now.

Here is Sapphire watching on the stairs, looking slightly annoyed.
20220311_204237.jpg

And here is Fluffy at that time.
20220311_204249.jpg
 

calicosrspecial

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Thank you :) I'll continue to provide small updates as I can. I suppose small details can help!

Tonight was pretty normal and straight forward. Fluffy typically doesn't want to stay upstairs and play anymore so I usually bring him downstairs shortly after dinner so he has about an hour out and about with me before bed. Sapphire was her usual self coming to the top of the stairs and just watching. Tonight Fluffy was obsessed with a tin foil ball and Sapphire watched while he chased it around. While Fluffy was playing or taking a break and just laying down, I would go try and pet Sapphire and as soon as I'd pet her she would run back upstairs. The odd time before running off she would make an almost trilling sound similar to when she sees birds but not quite (I used to and still think it's her annoyed sound however I'm not sure anymore).

Right towards putting Fluffy to bed, while he was looking out the window she came all the way downstairs, and he, of course jumped off the couch. As I had him distracted with a treat she walked towards the couch and behind the coffee table just to watch. Fluffy was quite excited desperately trying to sneak around me to get to her and I could tell he was getting ready to pounce/chase so I brought him to his room with treats and put him to bed.

Afterwards, sapphire jumped right up on the window perch and is relaxing there now.

Here is Sapphire watching on the stairs, looking slightly annoyed.
View attachment 413325
And here is Fluffy at that time.
View attachment 413326
"Thank you :) I'll continue to provide small updates as I can." - You are welcome and great.

" I suppose small details can help!" - EXACTLY!!! Something you may not realize as important can vey well be. So the more I know the better I can try to help.

"Tonight was pretty normal and straight forward." - Great

" Fluffy typically doesn't want to stay upstairs and play anymore" - Great. So he is reducing the "novelty" interest in her. Great. Actually, that is a great example of something you may not think a lot about but to me that is a really good sign.

" so I usually bring him downstairs shortly after dinner so he has about an hour out and about with me before bed." - GREAT!!!

" Sapphire was her usual self coming to the top of the stairs and just watching." - Perfect

" Tonight Fluffy was obsessed with a tin foil ball" - Awwwwwwwwww

" and Sapphire watched while he chased it around." - Great. I LOVE that she could see him moving faster, different than "normal" and be ok with it. Realize that those movements are towards a toy and not a threat to her. Again, something you may not think as important but to me that is another great sign.

"While Fluffy was playing or taking a break and just laying down, I would go try and pet Sapphire and as soon as I'd pet her she would run back upstairs." - OK. Or just talk to her in a loving way or just go about your business.

"The odd time before running off she would make an almost trilling sound similar to when she sees birds but not quite (I used to and still think it's her annoyed sound however I'm not sure anymore)." - Ok, so that very well could have been a play sound and move. That sound (and I would need to see her and hear it) usually is an excited good sound. So for a bird she wants to hunt it with another cat it is often a "let's play" sound.

"Right towards putting Fluffy to bed, while he was looking out the window she came all the way downstairs," - YES!!! I LOVE this!!! She is getting there slowly and steady.

" and he, of course jumped off the couch." - Of course. Because he saw or heard her?

" As I had him distracted with a treat she walked towards the couch and behind the coffee table just to watch." - Great

" Fluffy was quite excited desperately trying to sneak around me to get to her and I could tell he was getting ready to pounce/chase so I brought him to his room with treats and put him to bed." - Awwwwww, poor guy. He s wants to play. :/ He did she respond when he was trying to do that?

"Afterwards, sapphire jumped right up on the window perch and is relaxing there now." - PERFECT!!!

"Here is Sapphire watching on the stairs, looking slightly annoyed." - I don't really see her as "annoyed". Try to interpret her actions, body language rather than just the "look". The picture looks fine to me, focused and interested in what is going on. And combined with everything else you told me tells me she was fine, not really annoyed.

Look at how cute Fluffy is. He is going to win her over.................................... :)

Great update. I think there is a lot in here to suggest a lot of progress and positives. I am not reading one negative thing (and that has been the case for a while). Sapphire is doing great and really doing her part helped by your actions and Fluffy being so good.

GREAT JOB!!!
 
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Graham18

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Hello! I just wanted to quickly check in. I was out of province for work most of last week, hence the lack of any updates and I've been quite tired since I returned.

There really isn't much to update. Things have been progressing the same as always. Sapphire typically will stay upstairs in her room or if she is already downstairs when Fluffy comes out, she'll usually only stay down for a few minutes before she goes upstairs to her room and into her bed, at least until after she's heard the door to his room close for the night.

We had a chase/pounce/wrestle happen on Sunday morning. Sapphire was upstairs as usual and I had the gate up at the bottom of the stairs to keep Fluffy at bay. I was by the backdoor doing laundry and fluffy was there with me. I guess Sapphire came downstairs and squeezed through the bannister of the stairs or jumped over the gate and came into the kitchen right near the backdoor. I did realize that she came there until I heard Fluffy running and Sapphire screaming bloody murder. By the time I got to the living room Sapphire looked like she had fallen over or was knocked over onto her back and I grabbed Fluffy and Sapphire took off upstairs straight through the baby gate.

Fluffy got a bit of a time out to calm down and upstairs, Sapphire was hiding under my clothes rack, but she came out and laid down on the rug after less than a minute and seemed fine, letting me pet her, etc. Unsurprisingly she didn't come downstairs on Sunday even but she did on Monday morning for a few minutes and would just hiss at fluffy when he looked at her.

I will see if anything new and exciting happens for the rest of the week but I'm guessing it will be much of the same.

In other news, Sapphire had her yearly check-up yesterday and she's perfectly healthy (the vet said she could stand to lose a bit of weight which I was not expecting since she's the tiniest little girl).

Fluffy goes later this week :)
 

calicosrspecial

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Hello! I just wanted to quickly check in. I was out of province for work most of last week, hence the lack of any updates and I've been quite tired since I returned.

There really isn't much to update. Things have been progressing the same as always. Sapphire typically will stay upstairs in her room or if she is already downstairs when Fluffy comes out, she'll usually only stay down for a few minutes before she goes upstairs to her room and into her bed, at least until after she's heard the door to his room close for the night.

We had a chase/pounce/wrestle happen on Sunday morning. Sapphire was upstairs as usual and I had the gate up at the bottom of the stairs to keep Fluffy at bay. I was by the backdoor doing laundry and fluffy was there with me. I guess Sapphire came downstairs and squeezed through the bannister of the stairs or jumped over the gate and came into the kitchen right near the backdoor. I did realize that she came there until I heard Fluffy running and Sapphire screaming bloody murder. By the time I got to the living room Sapphire looked like she had fallen over or was knocked over onto her back and I grabbed Fluffy and Sapphire took off upstairs straight through the baby gate.

Fluffy got a bit of a time out to calm down and upstairs, Sapphire was hiding under my clothes rack, but she came out and laid down on the rug after less than a minute and seemed fine, letting me pet her, etc. Unsurprisingly she didn't come downstairs on Sunday even but she did on Monday morning for a few minutes and would just hiss at fluffy when he looked at her.

I will see if anything new and exciting happens for the rest of the week but I'm guessing it will be much of the same.

In other news, Sapphire had her yearly check-up yesterday and she's perfectly healthy (the vet said she could stand to lose a bit of weight which I was not expecting since she's the tiniest little girl).

Fluffy goes later this week :)
"Hello! I just wanted to quickly check in. I was out of province for work most of last week, hence the lack of any updates and I've been quite tired since I returned." - Hi, figured. Not an issue

"There really isn't much to update. Things have been progressing the same as always. Sapphire typically will stay upstairs in her room or if she is already downstairs when Fluffy comes out, she'll usually only stay down for a few minutes before she goes upstairs to her room and into her bed, at least until after she's heard the door to his room close for the night." - Ok, that is not bad.

"We had a chase/pounce/wrestle happen on Sunday morning." - Ok, let's see

" Sapphire was upstairs as usual and I had the gate up at the bottom of the stairs to keep Fluffy at bay. I was by the backdoor doing laundry and fluffy was there with me." - Ok

" I guess Sapphire came downstairs and squeezed through the bannister of the stairs or jumped over the gate and came into the kitchen right near the backdoor." - Ok, actually a good sign she came around.

"I did realize that she came there until I heard Fluffy running and Sapphire screaming bloody murder." - Yep :/

" By the time I got to the living room Sapphire looked like she had fallen over or was knocked over onto her back and I grabbed Fluffy and Sapphire took off upstairs straight through the baby gate." - Ok, how fast they rebound will tell us. But judging so far that does not sound that bad.

"Fluffy got a bit of a time out to calm down" - Ok

" and upstairs, Sapphire was hiding under my clothes rack," - Ok, not surprising.

" but she came out and laid down on the rug after less than a minute and seemed fine, letting me pet her, etc." - GREAT!!!! That is a GREAT sign!!! So though you may have thought it was bad it really wasn't all that bad AND maybe it built some trust (in the way it was not a real fight).

"Unsurprisingly she didn't come downstairs on Sunday even but she did on Monday morning for a few minutes and would just hiss at fluffy when he looked at her." - Ok, that is fine and pretty good she just hissed (but still came down).

"I will see if anything new and exciting happens for the rest of the week but I'm guessing it will be much of the same." - Ok, if it is that would be positive. I suspect you are correct.

"In other news, Sapphire had her yearly check-up yesterday and she's perfectly healthy (the vet said she could stand to lose a bit of weight which I was not expecting since she's the tiniest little girl)." - GREAT!!!!! :)

"Fluffy goes later this week :) " - Awwwwwwwww, good luck Fluffy!!!!

Sounds like all is well, maybe it might help AND it sounds like you are handling it well (which is FANTASTIC!!!!) :)
 
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"Hello! I just wanted to quickly check in. I was out of province for work most of last week, hence the lack of any updates and I've been quite tired since I returned." - Hi, figured. Not an issue

"There really isn't much to update. Things have been progressing the same as always. Sapphire typically will stay upstairs in her room or if she is already downstairs when Fluffy comes out, she'll usually only stay down for a few minutes before she goes upstairs to her room and into her bed, at least until after she's heard the door to his room close for the night." - Ok, that is not bad.

"We had a chase/pounce/wrestle happen on Sunday morning." - Ok, let's see

" Sapphire was upstairs as usual and I had the gate up at the bottom of the stairs to keep Fluffy at bay. I was by the backdoor doing laundry and fluffy was there with me." - Ok

" I guess Sapphire came downstairs and squeezed through the bannister of the stairs or jumped over the gate and came into the kitchen right near the backdoor." - Ok, actually a good sign she came around.

"I did realize that she came there until I heard Fluffy running and Sapphire screaming bloody murder." - Yep :/

" By the time I got to the living room Sapphire looked like she had fallen over or was knocked over onto her back and I grabbed Fluffy and Sapphire took off upstairs straight through the baby gate." - Ok, how fast they rebound will tell us. But judging so far that does not sound that bad.

"Fluffy got a bit of a time out to calm down" - Ok

" and upstairs, Sapphire was hiding under my clothes rack," - Ok, not surprising.

" but she came out and laid down on the rug after less than a minute and seemed fine, letting me pet her, etc." - GREAT!!!! That is a GREAT sign!!! So though you may have thought it was bad it really wasn't all that bad AND maybe it built some trust (in the way it was not a real fight).

"Unsurprisingly she didn't come downstairs on Sunday even but she did on Monday morning for a few minutes and would just hiss at fluffy when he looked at her." - Ok, that is fine and pretty good she just hissed (but still came down).

"I will see if anything new and exciting happens for the rest of the week but I'm guessing it will be much of the same." - Ok, if it is that would be positive. I suspect you are correct.

"In other news, Sapphire had her yearly check-up yesterday and she's perfectly healthy (the vet said she could stand to lose a bit of weight which I was not expecting since she's the tiniest little girl)." - GREAT!!!!! :)

"Fluffy goes later this week :) " - Awwwwwwwww, good luck Fluffy!!!!

Sounds like all is well, maybe it might help AND it sounds like you are handling it well (which is FANTASTIC!!!!) :)
Here's hoping that Sapphire gets a bit more comfortable and/or Fluffy calms down a bit.

I brought Fluffy upstairs this morning while holding him because he really wanted to go upstairs and see his sister. She was sitting on the dresser eye level and was pretty upset, hissing quite a bit and her ears were back. I guess she was just a bit grouchy this morning.
 

calicosrspecial

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Here's hoping that Sapphire gets a bit more comfortable and/or Fluffy calms down a bit.

I brought Fluffy upstairs this morning while holding him because he really wanted to go upstairs and see his sister. She was sitting on the dresser eye level and was pretty upset, hissing quite a bit and her ears were back. I guess she was just a bit grouchy this morning.
"Here's hoping that Sapphire gets a bit more comfortable and/or Fluffy calms down a bit." - Both WILL happen. How long it takes to basically "total access" I am not sure. BUT we will see more progress and ultimately I do think they will be friends. How close I am not sure but it will put a smile on your face. How long I am not sure until that though.

"I brought Fluffy upstairs this morning while holding him because he really wanted to go upstairs and see his sister. " - Awwwww, in a good way?

"She was sitting on the dresser eye level and was pretty upset, hissing quite a bit and her ears were back." - Ok, how was he?

" I guess she was just a bit grouchy this morning. " - Hahahaha, I guess so!!! I think a large part of it was "the incident" of the other day. BUT I am not at all worried about it. IF that is as bad as it gets then we are in really good shape!!!
 
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Graham18

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"Here's hoping that Sapphire gets a bit more comfortable and/or Fluffy calms down a bit." - Both WILL happen. How long it takes to basically "total access" I am not sure. BUT we will see more progress and ultimately I do think they will be friends. How close I am not sure but it will put a smile on your face. How long I am not sure until that though.

"I brought Fluffy upstairs this morning while holding him because he really wanted to go upstairs and see his sister. " - Awwwww, in a good way?

"She was sitting on the dresser eye level and was pretty upset, hissing quite a bit and her ears were back." - Ok, how was he?

" I guess she was just a bit grouchy this morning. " - Hahahaha, I guess so!!! I think a large part of it was "the incident" of the other day. BUT I am not at all worried about it. IF that is as bad as it gets then we are in really good shape!!!
Yes he was wanting to see her in a good way. I actually don't know if that's what he wanted but he usually just lays in the middle of the living room watching the top of the stairs meowing so I assume he's looking/waiting for her.

He was a little bit worked up when I had him but not too much. I don't recall him biting me at all and we went back downstairs without any issues.

After thinking about it, I believe I may have figured out why Sapphire was so grouchy/upset. Before I brought him upstairs, we were at the foot of the stairs and suddenly he tried to bolt up the stairs at high speed but I managed to catch him after he got up a few steps. I didn't see Sapphire at the top of the stairs but perhaps I missed her, or she may have peaked around the corner and he saw her. He's usually pretty good at not going upstairs when I'm nearby, especially at the speed he tried to go looking like he was after something. I won't ever know, so it's just an assumption that he was trying to chase her.
 
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