- Mar 23, 2012
- Reaction score
You sound just like my mom , she would always remind me not to get into sad news, or things that would make me anxious because it would cause me stress. I get caught when i see a sad news title. I have to be more careful.Big props to you for keeping up with your walking. And you are having positive results that you can feel. So keep it up! No matter what, keep doing it, even on days you may "not feel like it" because it is helping you. This is what I do with working out. There are days I'm "too tired" or "too busy" or "too down" and I push myself. And like every other time, IT HELPS. Because exercise heightens endorphins, which are our natural "feel-good medicine".
As far as changing, at any age, YOU CAN. I have changed many, many things in terms of habits and thought patterns. Not with doctors, coaches, programs or anything else. Just by myself. And I am a normal person. I am also older than you. If I can do it, you can do it. When I set some big goals for myself, I always had an end "present" for myself in mind. When I liked my own cooking (and a lot of restaurants) too much, I set the goal and the "present" was that if I reached the goal -- actually WHEN, not "if" -- I would buy myself a top in the size I wanted to attain. It happened, and I did. And I maintain it. Because I feel good being small, not only in terms of how I look but also in terms of not carrying extra weight on my terrible feet, and in hot weather. Yes, I eat things I like -- but the "treats" are in small portions. I don't do restaurants any more because I can't afford them and even if I could, I would not be able to go to the ones I love because they are too far away and my roomies don't eat that kind of food. I also don't make the extra-over-the-top rich dishes any more. What you don't have, IMHO, you don't miss.
And as for those, what I call atrocity stories, I do not see/read them. I refuse to. These things that happen will not un-happen because I am aware of them. All that would happen would be that I would make myself sick with stress, anger, and sorrow. So I do not do that. If I happen to come across something sad, which I do every day, many times, in my work, my answer is to say a Prayer for that soul, who is beyond all pain anyway! If it is someone still here and in need, I help in doing my work. And then I must leave it in the Care of the Almighty. People who delve into these horrifically bad things do themselves great harm, and do those they are about no good. So I would ask you not to. You have plenty and then some on your plate as it is.
I have had days when i didnt want to walk, or want to put it off for the end of the day. But i just force myself to walk. And i feel better afterwards. I have to keep telling myself that i can change. Maybe thats one of the things that keep making me go through a cycle of gaining weight and losing it. I felt great the last time i lost a lot of weight, but ended up gaining it back. i had so much energy.
This might make me sound dumb. But lately when i think about losing weight, i am reminded of my mother. She spent years trying to lose weight to get off the insulin. She would lose weight for a few years, and then gain it back, and repeat. Theres wasnt much information on diets back then, just all the fad diets that would come out.
Even when she was hospitalized, and finally came home, food was a comfort for her. When she was sad and in pain, she would ask us for her comfort foods. I keep thinking that even until the end she wasnt able to take control of her health. The smoking, diabetes, and weight probably triggered her pancreatic cancer. I have it in my mind, that if she failed, why should i be different? i know that is ridiculous, but its been going through my mind.
I remember seeing her walking with her walker to the kitchen because she was checking for croquettes and couldnt find any. Her mind was so damaged from the intubation that she left the kitchen, and came back to check again. She was very forgetful towards the end. Just thinking about her makes me feel like i am destined to walk her same path. I am already pre-diabetic and have high blood pressure. She didnt get sick until she was much older than me.
it does make me feel better to know you've been successful. I have to work on changing my mindset.