Venting....

  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #43

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
i love my sister dearly, and wish her well. but there are times that i truly cannot stand her. she has her moments when shes kind. but lately all she does is nag, and whine about the most insignificant things. i try to keep the peace and stay in my room as much as possible. as soon as i head out its to hear her nag.

she used to not care where the cats went. lately she cant stand the cats on the table, and spends her time chasing them away with water. :angryfire: i feel my frustration growing, and i dont want to tell her what im thinking. the last time i allowed my anger to get the better of me i ended up having to leave my childhood home after a fight with my brother.

im doing everything i can to maintain the peace, but i dont know how much longer i'll be able to stand her.

i resent her and i think thats mixing in and making things seem worse than they are.

ive started applying for part time work but havent had any luck. im hoping i can find something i can do after my day job. :vibes:
 

LTS3

TCS Member
Staff Member
Forum Helper
Joined
Aug 29, 2014
Messages
14,762
Reaction score
13,174
Location
USA
Are you using references? Is it possible that a reference is not saying good things about you to a potential employer? I've had that happen. Someone I had previously worked with and I thought I could trust and give me a good reference sabotaged at least 2 of the jobs I applied for for her own selfish reasons. It was something she said after I didn't heard back from a job interview despite a follow up email and phone that tipped me off. I stopped using her as a reference (didn't tell her) and gave her vague answers when she asked about my job search.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #45

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
Are you using references? Is it possible that a reference is not saying good things about you to a potential employer? I've had that happen. Someone I had previously worked with and I thought I could trust and give me a good reference sabotaged at least 2 of the jobs I applied for for her own selfish reasons. It was something she said after I didn't heard back from a job interview despite a follow up email and phone that tipped me off. I stopped using her as a reference (didn't tell her) and gave her vague answers when she asked about my job search.
I'm positive my references won't say anything negative. I got my current job thanks to my references saying positive things. My current boss told me about the conversation he had with them. ;) but thank you for the reply. You can never be too careful.


Edit: I've had 5 interviews in the past couple of months. I think the problem is with me. When I first meet people I tend to be shy. So I don't know if that is what's stopping me from getting the job. I do my best to smile and be respectful. But who knows?:(
 
Last edited:
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #47

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
Well, you never know so just be cautious of who you use as references. Looking back, I now realize that reference sabotaged my entire job search in numerous ways:angrywoman:

Introverts in particular can find interviews daunting. I found some helpful articles here: Search for "interview" - Introvert, Dear
thank you for the advice i will be careful. ;) and thank you for the article, i will check it out. I really think my shyness is what is mainly holding me back.

I have another interview next week. Its for the City of Doral which is 5 minutes away from my current job. I applied over two months ago and they randomly called me up.

I also got an email from Sams Club, I had applied for a job on indeed, and they sent me an email with a request to apply for another job for them. I'm waiting to see if they get back to me. I'm hoping i can find an afternoon/weekend job. :heartshape::crossfingers:
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #48

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
i finally met my sisters boyfriend. so far he doesnt give me any bad vibes. i tend to go with my feelings on things. her first husband gave me a creepy feeling even though he was so friendly and everyone liked him. turned out i was right about him sadly.

we'll see how things go. he seemed genuinely happy to be here. i wish her well. but he just seems too good to be true. wanting to buy a car for her daughter and things like that when they've been together a month or so.

they finally saw each other in person yesterday and they are celebrating their wedding renewal today.

hopefully things go well. it gives me the incentive to find work soon since they move back down in 5 months. my cats are already getting on her nerves because of the messes pets make. i dont want to wait until i have the same issues with her, that i had with my brother.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #50

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
I hope he's all he seems to be, that will be wonderful for your sister.
I agree. :vibes::heartshape:

she's leaving to Indiana tomorrow. And will be back in 5 months or so. So I don't have much time. :running:

I am glad she's moving back tho. Itd make me sad if she permanently moved over there.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #52

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
So what happens now? Do you have to take over all the bills?
Not sure. She hasn't told me anything yet. She hasn't asked me to just yet. She hasn't really discussed the house bills with us. I'll do what I can. But my focus is on moving out. My niece wants to move out too. She'll gave to figure out what to do with her house.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #53

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
I was talking to him earlier he was telling me they were moving down as fast as they could.

I can't tell if he likes cats. He was telling me he wanted to visit friends with 10 cats but he can't stand the smell so it'll be a quick visit. He said he was wondering how our house wasn't stinky with cat pee. :confused2: makes me wonder if he'll have issues with the cats fur and litter. I pray I can figure something out before they come down. My sister already has moments that she gets annoyed. He seems to like giving his opinion on things and dont want to be somewhere uncomfortable. :paperbag:
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #55

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
Did they get married over the phone or something?
they married when my sister was 14. shes in her 50s now. so they knew each other for a short time. the marriage was fake because the family originally intended to get into the US by marriage. but in the end my parents and older siblings came to the US by boat. so the marriage was for nothing.

they believed they were divorced. my sister married two more times after that. they met again online about a month ago and found out they never actually divorced. so they decided to give the marriage a try. so technically they've been married all these years even though they both went on to marry other people. :stars:

my parents wanted to get away from their birth country, it was not safe there.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #57

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
So the marriage is legal? I have to admit that is kinda exciting and romantic.
i dont know much about the law, but they married in cuba.

lol you sound like my sister, shes saying its meant to be. i think im just more realistic and cynical than her. but hopefully things work out for her. :heartshape:
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #60

terestrife

TCS Member
Thread starter
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 23, 2012
Messages
2,027
Reaction score
2,018
just found out my oldest brother was heard talking during the party, about the situation, saying he didnt like how fast things happened, and that he found the way the guy was acting to be very strange. he was supposedly saying that a lot of people felt that way.

looks like people have been having weird feelings but no one has confronted my sister.

i think since shes the oldest sibling people tend to let her do crazy things and dont interfere. especially because of her temper. lol
 
Top