My Pumps Who Loved Me So Much Is Now A Star In The Sky

[Antonio65]

foxxycat ,
I'm terribly sorry for the loss of your precious Pumpkin, but you have nothing to regret. You loved her so much, you gave her what nobody else would have given her, she knows that, she has always known, she always will.
She's not in pain any longer, she's at the Bridge, where everything is wonderful, quiet and happy. And Pumpkin, like all other cats who went to the Bridge before her, has her new set of wings.
I'm sure you know that Dick Shawn once said:
If you gave wings to a cat, it would not condescend to be a bird. It would be an angel.
Cats are the Angels in Pets Paradise, no other animal would be a better angel than a cat. Pumpkin will be an amazing angel.

She was very weak and I mistakenly thought it was from not eating. at least next time this happens I won't wait so long. My poor girl.

I do hope you will never have to experience anything like that in your life, there won't be a next time!

I fear some day I will never want to love anything again because it hurts so damn much.

I'm living in this stage now, and it is so bad...

He won't talk about her for a long time. It's like a forbidden thing here. We can't talk about the deceased. Which in my opinion is not healthy at all. But that's the difference between men and women. We deal with things differently.

I don't think it depends on the genre, I talk about my deceased cats almost everyday, since the first moment they're gone. To be true, I think that the names Lola and Pallina come out of my mouth at least once a day.

 

[Norachan]

I'm so sorry Foxxycat. I know how much your girls mean to you.



I hope you'll take some comfort from the fact that you were with her right up until the end and now she's sleeping nearby with her sisters. I don't think we ever get over losing them, but eventually you'll be able to look back on all the nice memories you have of her and smile a little.

Rest in Peace sweet Pumpkin.

 

[foxxycat]

This makes me cry.

I am so sorry for your loss.

I'm sorry to make others cry. I'm still crying. But ya know I was born crying. Always something makes me sad.

Here we are Monday morning. Just laying here watching the news and feel numb. I won't have to give meds to Pumps. We called her Lumpers. Pumpy Lumpy. She used to crawl under the covers when people came over and made a lump in the bed .


In her younger years she slept beside Jon nightly curled up against his belly. She would come up on the bed. Tap him on the head. He would lift the blankets and she would crawl underneath. that cat loved to cuddle. It's been a long time since she's done that since the arthritis made it difficult for her so in one way I'm kind of relieved that she doesn't have to live in pain anymore. It just sucks that it happened the way it did. I still don't understand where we went wrong. You would think cardiac issues would have shown up in her blood work.

And I will spin my wheels for the next week or two. it's just how it is.

 

[di and bob]

I couldn't talk about my Chrissy for a long time, it just brought up too many hurtful feelings. I would cry just thinking about her, saying her name destroyed me.....
When our precious little ones are beyond pain, it is our turn to hurt. We punish ourselves by going over all the things we could have done different, that we should have known, and desperately trying to make sense of the unthinkable. And as each and everyone of us finds out, it changes nothing and only brings pain to an already broken heart. Don't make Pumps death more important in your mind than her beautiful life. Concentrate on those precious moments that she shared with you, that she willingly gave to you, because that is what she wants for those she loved so much. Horrible times like these force us to prioritize our feelings, what is important to us as we go into the future. Forces us to confront our own mortality and how we approach life. Receiving and giving love is one of the most important parts of a well lived life. Our hearts can hold an infinite amount of love, and as we give our own love it makes room for even more.
Because love is spiritual, it never leaves that heart, it becomes a part of you and will forever be there when you need it. Each and every love is irreplaceable, as unique as a snowflake and always present in one form or another. Pumps love is forever tied to your own. "Death cannot take that which never dies" and you know her love will be with you forever, as close as your thoughts and prayers. Ask her to help heal your heart and she will, she is at peace now and only wants that for your heart as well....So mourn her loss to your life, but rejoice in the permanent addition to your soul.
My heart goes out to you, it is a long, difficult road to travel to heal a broken heart. Time is the only thing that helps. And sharing your burden of grief with those who understand..... i'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.
RIP dear Pumps. The pure light that comes from the new star that is you in the evening sky will shine down on those you loved so very much. May you slumber on in that patch of warmth and light for eternity, at peace because you were so very loved. May the good Lord bless and keep you until you meet again!

 

[artiemom]

Again.. so sorry... ((Hugs))

and again, do not feel any guilt, whatsoever.

You did what you thought was right, and were guided by experienced, knowledgeable Vets...

Please be kind to yourself.. give yourself a break from guilt.. does not make the emptiness and hurt lessen, but... be good to yourself....
Jon--too

Thinking of the 3 of your..You, Jon, and Bee

How is HoneyBee doing?

love

 

[maggiedemi]

This was so hard to read. I'm bawling like a baby. I'm sending all my love to you, Jon, and Honeybee. May it offer you some comfort along with all the wonderful messages above from all your friends. RIP sweet Pumpkin Face, the kitty of many beautiful colors. We will never forget you.

 

[foxxycat]

Hi Maggie and Artiemom, Bee is fine. In fact she's not done anything weird to show grief. She was chasing Pumps in her last few days. So I knew something was wrong. Honeybee is a dominant girl. I just wish I could turn back time to a month ago and this time do things differently but guess that's not helpful is it?

 

[Furballsmom]

 

[foxxycat]

I've been still spinning my wheels. I know she was on quite a bit of meds. I still wonder if I should have had an echo done earlier this year. i never thought to bother. I just chalked it up to her being an old lady and would move slower. I also been reading on some scientific sites that cats with cardiac problems rarely show on xrays or blood tests. Unless it is specific things that they test for.

I will be ok. Still a shock. I wasn't expecting this.

A guy at work has a 10 yr old he want me to take. Hes indoor and outdoor. He needs a safe place to live. Hes with dogs and hates them but this month he's been fighting back at the dogs. And now every morning they have a scuffle routine. He showed me a video of them playing. The cat isn't mad. His tail was up the entire time. he was clamping onto the dog being agressice and the pug just wanted to lick the cat amd the cat is like hell no!

 

[mama africa]

I wish I had the right words... just know I care.

 

[foxxycat]

It's ok mama africa I understand. My Bee girl hasnt been sleeping on me for quite some time now. But it could be because of the heat. Jon's been very cold lately so I try to keep it warmwr for him even though I am dieing! I like it 65. But i think once he gets on new meds for RA he may not be so cold. I've had to sit on his feet for like 15 minutes to warm him up. Ugg I hate it hot. I feel like my heads gonna pop off.

I am gonna try to see if my coworker will send me the video of the dog n cat horsing around. i told him maybe the cat doesn't min the dogs now. I asked if the cat likes other cats. Said he's been fine with other ones.

He wants me to take. Him for a week. If it doesn't work out I can return him.

What do you guys think? He told me his wife told him she didn't want to give him away to just anyone. he said to her don't worry she's one of the best pet parents out there.

Should I call the local vet we use to let them know she passed away? They use the same computer system. I just feel really bad. The lady really loved Pumps. Everyone loved pumps.

 

[maggiedemi]

He wants me to take. Him for a week. If it doesn't work out I can return him.

What do you guys think?

I would give it a try. What does the boy kitty look like, what color?

 

[Antonio65]

I would give this cat a chance, he might be a lovely senior chap with lots of love to give and currently unable to express because of the dogs.
If it doesn't work, you can return him or help your coworker find another good home.

It's ok mama africa

mama africa

 

[foxxycat]

Yes the two vets are sister vets. But I will call tomorrow. I don't want to cry again today.

The cat is a tiger cat. Good sized cat

 

[Furballsmom]

 

[mrsgreenjeens]

foxxycat , I'm so sorry your beautiful girl is gone. Please don't blame yourself for not figuring out what was happening. How could you when even your Vet didn't realize?

Now Pumpkin is truly an angel with her very own set of wings and she is with all of those who went before her, doing whatever it is that cat angels do. Best of all, she is doing it without any pain.

Run free at the bridge, beautiful Pumpkin

 

[foxxycat]

Some pictures of my baby.

Here's thr best portrait of her that I did. Somewhere is a drawing of her I did in 2013? 2014? Not sure where it is.

Here is Lumps and Bee in August. Our last vacation together. Pumps didn't go outside much then. She spent the day under my bed in her bed and at night on the bed with Jon

This was the only time I saw Pumps grooming Bee. Bee was upset in the cage and kept mashing her face against the wire.

This photo was taken on Wed? Nov 27? 28?
This is her spot in the library. Her nest is to the left of this spot. She prefered to stuff herself in this corner.

Here iz the tree that I used to pill Pumps and give her her puffs.

 

[foxxycat]

I found the drawing.

 

[margd]

Dear Foxxycat, words can not express how deeply sorry I am to hear that sweet Pumps has crossed the bridge. And it is breaking my heart to read how much you are second guessing her last days. You are one of the best cat moms ever. Your care for Pumps and Honeybee is love itself and that shows in the wonderful lives you made possible for both of them. Please, do not blame yourself in any way - everything you did for Pumps was with her best interest in mind, just as it always was. Your many friends here are all telling you this and I hope some day you'll feel the truth of what we say.

Your portrait of her is gorgeous, it really is. What a dear face! I want to reach through the screen and give her a kiss. She really was a terrific cat, very special and your portrait really does justice to her. If you find the drawing, I know I'm not the only one who would love to see it.

I wish I could give you a hug in person, this is so, so hard, I know. It's such a contradiction that they rip out a part of our hearts when they leave while simultaneously embedding themselves even deeper. Pumps will always be there and I hope the time comes when you can smile through the tears when you think of her. She enriched your life, just as you enriched hers.

Rest in peace sweet angel, Pumpkin Face.

 

[margd]

We cross-posted - I missed that you'd posted your drawing of her. It's really good. You've captured such a look of intensity in her eyes! Wow. I wish I could draw as well as you do!