I just finished 'A Mother's Reckoning' by Sue Kiebold, Dylan Kiebold's mother. For those who may not remember he was one of the Columbine shooters. It was very interesting. She went through the process of dropping the denial and getting a clear look at what happened. She talks about what the media called the 'journal' it wasn't actually a journal. The police tore apart his room, school locker, and car after it happened. The journal was a collection of things he had written over the two years before, some were just little notes and he was severely depressed. A psychologist said he probably had an avoidant personality. He then hooked up with a kid who was a true sociopath. She also talked about the 'basement tape', not in great detail but that is where the last of her denial fell away.
She talks about how good kids are at hiding things from their parents, she now says that she would absolutely routinely search her children's rooms. She said she doesn't care what experts say or how angry it makes her kids she would search.
It isn't maudlin, she doesn't make excuses and she isn't looking for forgiveness. She did want to set the record straight about them being wealthy, they were not. Much was made about their son having a BMW, it was bought for 400 dollars and he and his father worked on it together. Their house was large on a large property but it was a barely habitable fixer upper which they worked on themselves. That was made more difficult when her husband developed rheumatoid arthritis. Their marriage did not survive this.
She talks about how good kids are at hiding things from their parents, she now says that she would absolutely routinely search her children's rooms. She said she doesn't care what experts say or how angry it makes her kids she would search.
It isn't maudlin, she doesn't make excuses and she isn't looking for forgiveness. She did want to set the record straight about them being wealthy, they were not. Much was made about their son having a BMW, it was bought for 400 dollars and he and his father worked on it together. Their house was large on a large property but it was a barely habitable fixer upper which they worked on themselves. That was made more difficult when her husband developed rheumatoid arthritis. Their marriage did not survive this.