The "what's On Your Mind?" Thread -2018

[LTS3]

The manager I did two interviews with told me that they were desperate for a new person. You would think that if they were desperate, they would make a decision quickly

 

[Margret]

oh just heard back from the guy we rented from last year-they are using a different rental company-price is cheaper AND adding washer/dryer and satellite tv/internet. So looks like we will just stick with them...in fact they are cheaper than the small cottages I see on tripadvisor..

Oh, good! That sounds ideal for you!

I do not know what is with companies lately.. Do they have a glut of people interviewing? do they not call back anyone? It used to be that if you did not hear from a place after an interview, that meant you did not get the job.. I think it is their way of not 'getting involved' with telling bad news.. but, it seems everything has changed, and you do not know what to think anymore. Crazy...

Actually, I remember hearing about this kind of behavior in my youth as well. It's been around for quite a long time.

The manager I did two interviews with told me that they were desperate for a new person. You would think that if they were desperate, they would make a decision quickly

Or else they're also desperate not to let themselves be stampeded into hiring the wrong person.

she'll be ok, but I'll still feel like a class-A jerk for doing it!

I know you already know this, but it sounds like you need a reminder: Feeling like a jerk is okay as long as you're not acting like a jerk, and in fact you are doing the exact opposite of acting like a jerk. I know; it's extremely annoying that we can't properly explain our behavior to the cats we care for, but there's no way around that, so we just have to do our best for them and then let it go.

Margret

 

[dustydiamond1]

WELL PHOOEY! What I forgot to tell you all is that I am now patting and stroking Sprite on a regular basis, and she is spending almost every night in the SFS! I think that in another few weeks I'll be able to get my neighbor Suzanne to put the word out at her church that a kitten needs a good home. The thing that is KILLING me, though, is that we have a HUD/RD inspection on Thursday. We have snow coming (just a little, and might not stick) tomorrow. That means that I have to get up early on Thursday morning and boot Sprite out of the shelter, then push it flush with the wall so that they don't see the entrance. DANGIT! Well...she survived the 4 inches for a week not in there, so she'll be ok, but I'll still feel like a class-A jerk for doing it!

Don't feel bad, at least you had advance notice. Sprite will be OK for one day.

 

[artiemom]

WELL PHOOEY! What I forgot to tell you all is that I am now patting and stroking Sprite on a regular basis, and she is spending almost every night in the SFS! I think that in another few weeks I'll be able to get my neighbor Suzanne to put the word out at her church that a kitten needs a good home. The thing that is KILLING me, though, is that we have a HUD/RD inspection on Thursday. We have snow coming (just a little, and might not stick) tomorrow. That means that I have to get up early on Thursday morning and boot Sprite out of the shelter, then push it flush with the wall so that they don't see the entrance. DANGIT! Well...she survived the 4 inches for a week not in there, so she'll be ok, but I'll still feel like a class-A jerk for doing it!

My gut feeling is that Sprite will be ok.. she may be hanging around for a bit, looking for the entrance and for you.. but she will be ok. I worry about her also.. remember Mama is still around, watching our for her baby.. she will not allow anything to happen to her.

Sprite may take a bit of step backward; but, knowing you, she will be back very quickly for "loving".. You and the shelter are too important to her. A lifeline. Do not be discouraged if she is a bit skittish, after this episode. She will be confused. Just be natural and show her you love, as is your way. She knows you now.

Perhaps, after the inspection, put out an old smelly piece of your clothing.. just a thought. Sprite may smell it and be more comfortable.. I mean, if it works for indoor cats, it should work for a semi-feral.

I know as soon as you are able to, you will tell Suzanne to spread the word. I would just love to see Sprite in a home.. indoors, always... safe and warm..

 

[Max's Human]

Today I'm really angry because one of my closest friends told me that her bf locks their two cats (a 3-yo and the other is just a few months old) in the bathroom at night. They scratch and meow at their bedroom door, and not sleeping gives him panic attacks. I feel bad for not caring about her bf's issues if he doesn't sleep (apparently even earplugs don't do it?), but it breaks my heart and makes me SO mad that they do that.

Maybe THE BF should sleep in the bathroom. He could get help without treating the babies LIKE that!!!

 

[arouetta]

The boyfriend - trazodone. While I can understand the need for sleep, there's gotta be a happy compromise, and a bathroom is just too darn small. Either put up a door dividing the entire place in half so there's a barrier between the cats and the bedroom door, or sleeping pills. Sleeping pills would be cheaper and less damaging to the home.

 

[Alicia88]

Mine are used to sleeping with me and now that they can't, they scratch at the door. We deal with it. They give up eventually. I haven't - and wouldn't - even considered locking them in the bathroom. The bf sounds like a real whiner.
I'm sure Sprite will be just fine. You've done tons for her and it's just for one day. You won't be able to do anything for her if you get kicked out, so you're not being a jerk at all.

 

[Yanaka]

THAT would be the point I point to door- GET OUT and stay out. That would tick me off too. My girls sleep with us..and Honeybee doesn't take too kindly to a locked door. She will rip the carpet up and scratch/bite the door.

Right??!! At least be patient and train them to stay out of the room... And she had warned him that it would happen when they were going to get the kitten...

 

[foxxycat]

The boyfriend - trazodone. While I can understand the need for sleep, there's gotta be a happy compromise, and a bathroom is just too darn small. Either put up a door dividing the entire place in half so there's a barrier between the cats and the bedroom door, or sleeping pills. Sleeping pills would be cheaper and less damaging to the home.

Yes trazadon is perfect. Lol. You can get some Benadryl. That is the same thing that's in over the counter sleeping pills except for one type of unisom. I know because for almost 10 years I needed an aid to fall asleep... now I have a special tea...

In fact Jon and I are the type we would sleep on the floor in the master bathroom just so they wouldnt be lonely. Or at least I can..Jon can't anymore but i slept in yjere with honeybee when she got a bone marrow test and she wouldn't stop pulling cone of shame off her...

Anyways that person needs a smack on the head.

 

[kashmir64]

My son just showed me this game site. G2a. It is so cheap. I just got Lego Pirates of the Caribbean for $2.22. And it has a steam code to activate through Steam. They are not pirated games, just much cheaper than anyone else. So cool.

 

[segelkatt]

Yes trazadon is perfect. Lol. You can get some Benadryl. That is the same thing that's in over the counter sleeping pills except for one type of unisom. I know because for almost 10 years I needed an aid to fall asleep... now I have a special tea...

In fact Jon and I are the type we would sleep on the floor in the master bathroom just so they wouldnt be lonely. Or at least I can..Jon can't anymore but i slept in yjere with honeybee when she got a bone marrow test and she wouldn't stop pulling cone of shame off her...

Anyways that person needs a smack on the head.

She needs to get rid of the boyfriend. If he treats cats that way sooner or later he will treat her that way, he's just using his inability to sleep to make her do something she does not want to do. And a very small kitten to be treated that way is animal abuse. Why oh why don't people, usually women not learn that this kind of behavior will not stop but will just get worse? There are more fish in the sea, there is a good man out there who loves cats and is looking for her instead of this jerk. I hope her friend will talk to her about that.

 

[foxxycat]

She needs to get rid of the boyfriend. If he treats cats that way sooner or later he will treat her that way, he's just using his inability to sleep to make her do something she does not want to do. And a very small kitten to be treated that way is animal abuse. Why oh why don't people, usually women not learn that this kind of behavior will not stop but will just get worse? There are more fish in the sea, there is a good man out there who loves cats and is looking for her instead of this jerk. I hope her friend will talk to her about that.

100% agree...I see it daily. There's women that treat men like crap too..I have several men here who won't leave their dragon. So it's both ways. There's crappy people on both sides.

 

[segelkatt]

100% agree...I see it daily. There's women that treat men like crap too..I have several men here who won't leave their dragon. So it's both ways. There's crappy people on both sides.

I do know that there are women also who treat their men badly. The difference is that in general men can do more physical harm than women simply because of their size. Since this is going on in HER place (it's not apparent if he lives there or is just spending the night) she should put her foot down and demand to either go to HIS place to spend the night or to put up with the cats NOT being locked up. Of course the best thing is to get rid of this potentially dangerous and abusive person.

 

[kashmir64]

The way I see it is that he obviously has control over her. Right now, he's just using her emotions (toward him) but very soon it will become physical. This will not end well if she doesn't stop it now.

 

[foxxycat]

Unfortunately there's a few women who have beat their husbands..and they stay..I have one guy who tells me stuff and I keep telling him-why do you stay?? I say the same thing I say to women-only you have the power to change your future..and as a poster I saw in High school:

If something in your life stinks=change it. (it was a picture of a baby's butt in a diaper-in reference to dirty diaper=life)

I have lived by that moto for many years.

Positive for now-spreading awareness for those who feel trapped-you are only as trapped as you let yourselves be.

 

[Alicia88]

Leaving can be hard. I've been there. My ex nearly killed me and I still wound up goj my back. I spent 2 months in a DV shelter and that was there limit and I had nowhere else to go. I was recovering from a lacerated spleen and kidney and had no way of finding a job or getting money to get back home. My ex husband abandoned me in California and all my friends and family were in Missouri with no money to get me back. The abusive guy talked me into quitting my job, moving on with him, and going back to school. Then he got abusive. He said all the right things and I went back but nothing changed. Then I thought I was pregnant. I refused to raise a child in that environment. Found another dv shelter and was able to stay there til my mom got her income taxes and flew me home. I wasn't pregnant - apparently the stress caused the symptoms. Positive - a non-existent child saved my life. That was my wake up call. And now my life is much better. I have a great man and a beautiful baby and I don't have to worry about getting beat because I look at him wrong.

 

[Mother Dragon]

 

[debbila]

In November I was told by my ophthamologist that I can no longer drive. I've had glaucoma for many years and I don't have vision in my left eye except for light. It's advanced to me losing peripheral vision on the left of my right eye. As some of you know, I had a stent implant in my right eye in August. The stent doesn't correct my vision. Loss from glaucoma can't be restored, the stent is to stop the high pressure and prevent any more vision loss. I've had exams every 1 - 2 weeks and the stent is doing the job well.
As you can imagine, this came as a shock. So for the past two months I've been signing up for discounted transportation that's available for seniors and people with disabilties. I've already started using the Senior Cab program and waiting to hear if I'm approved for the other program. My boyfriend is a gem. He's been taking me to all those appointments. I feel bad that at times he has to wait a long time for me ( you know how those doctors are! ). I'll use the cab service now for those long appointments. I am grateful for the stent implant, that such a thing exists to help me and so many others.

Does anyone have any experience of their own or someone they know that has health problems that prevents them from driving? I'd like to hear how you/they deal with it.

............

 

[Mother Dragon]

I'm so very sorry about your vision loss. I know it's scary as well as a big blow to your independence.

I found several resources in your area which may be of help to you. If they can't help, perhaps they can refer you to someone who can.

ACBVI

Arizona Low Vision Resources, Organizations and Information

http://www.azifb.com

Your ophthalmologist can probably refer you to others as well as providing direct information.

With a little time, you're going to become much more independent than you believe possible.

You have a large and caring family here at TCS. Reach out to us any time.

 

[Margret]

debbila , I have a friend who has never had stereoscopic vision. He had a driver's license at one time but frightened himself so badly by being unable to correctly judge distance that he gave it up voluntarily. Since then he has either taken the bus (which gets him to and from work just fine), his wife has driven him, or he's cadged rides from friends. However, his wife is now suffering from apparent dementia and is no longer able to drive him at all, so if he can't take the bus he either doesn't go or he cadges a ride. If it's somewhere that he and his wife both want to go they have to cadge a ride, because his wife would not do well on the bus.

I believe that his wife doesn't have a formal diagnosis of dementia (it's just obvious to everyone around them), and that my friend is in denial about the nature of his wife's illness so he isn't going to ask for a formal diagnosis. My friend isn't technically "disabled" since he sees well enough to continue to work, and without a formal diagnosis for the wife they can't qualify for any of those Senior or Disabled cab programs, and his wife isn't able to go anywhere on her own safely, so they're kind of stuck between a rock and a hard place. I know it's very difficult for both of them.

When possible, they offer to hold gatherings at their house, since it means that they don't have to go anywhere and that the wife can go to her own bedroom to rest when things get difficult for her, but that doesn't work very frequently for them because one of the people in the group they most often wish to host is seriously allergic to cats, and they have cats.

Also, after my brain surgery I was unable to legally drive for over a year. My husband was rarely around to take me places, and the people he was paying to help care for me were extremely remiss in their responsibility. We don't live on a bus route, so I tried to sign up for some of those programs and was unable to do so, though it's quite clear that I qualified. As far as I can tell they never even tried to verify my data and find out whether I qualified; I think they may have been overloaded. When my husband was hospitalized the only way I could get groceries that I could safely eat was to call my husband's pastor and ask if someone from the church could give me a ride to the grocery store. Fortunately the church was extremely helpful in this regard, even though it was my husband's church and not mine. This is not uncommon; if you're a church member that's another resource you may want to explore. For that matter, I'm convinced that I could have gotten help from that particular church even if it hadn't been my husband's church, except that I wouldn't have known to ask for it, so even if you aren't a church-goer you may want to check on those options.

Margret