The "what's On Your Mind?" Thread -2018

[Mamanyt1953]

I still feel like I failed her. It took her so long to really warm up to us and get cuddly. She demands pets now and we used to have to go to her. I hope this doesn't ruin her trust.

Stop. You have done the very best you can for her. You did NOT "fail" her. And she might have to go through another adjustment period, but it is very unlikely that you "ruined" her trust! Hugs, Darlin. Better to care much than too little.

Help quick. I caught Montressor licking the mayo off my husband's lunch plate. I didn't see anything suspect on the ingredients list. Should I worry?

She'll be fine. Hekitty once licked a bit of mayo...very out of character for her, and there were no ill-effects. Her stools were a TINY bit softer for a day or two, but there was no out-right diarrhea. Now, different cats may react in different ways, but don't go borrowing trouble...or poop, as the case may be.

 

[Willowy]

Mayo is just eggs and oil and a bit of lemon juice/vinegar. So whatever effect eggs and oil would normally have on him. A few licks shouldn't cause any trouble but it depends on his tummy.

 

[Alicia88]

Stop. You have done the very best you can for her. You did NOT "fail" her. And she might have to go through another adjustment period, but it is very unlikely that you "ruined" her trust! Hugs, Darlin. Better to care much than too little.



She'll be fine. Hekitty once licked a bit of mayo...very out of character for her, and there were no ill-effects. Her stools were a TINY bit softer for a day or two, but there was no out-right diarrhea. Now, different cats may react in different ways, but don't go borrowing trouble...or poop, as the case may be.

I hope maybe I can end up visiting her once in a while. This woman's first response made me like her immediately. I posted Marcy on the local pet rehoming Facebook page, she commented that she was interested, and messaged me saying that she wouldn't be able to take her until Monday because they'd be going out of town for the weekend and she didn't want to pick her up and immediately leave her alone. So she was already thinking about Marcy's comfort. We messaged back and forth a bit and I told her I wanted to meet her so we'll probably be getting together tomorrow. And then John told me they'd known each other in school and said she'd take good care of her. Quite a coincidence, I guess, but this is a small town so maybe not that much of one, but it still made me feel better. And, I could use a new friend so maybe we can strike up a friendship and I can still see Marcy once in a while. I've been giving her extra cuddles all weekend.
Murphy stole a McDonald's chicken sandwich once when it was left unattended. The weirdo didn't want the chicken. He just pulled it apart and licked off all the mayo. Didn't bother him at all.

 

[Willowy]

I feel bad for the road engineers around here. Today it's about 90 degrees (yes, in May. I had the heater on 2 weeks ago), and I just saw a road crew fixing an area that buckled in the heat. During the winter when it gets -20, they have to fill all the gaps from contracting. It must be frustrating for them to try to make roads that can stand up to the crazy weather here.

Keeps the road crews busy though, nice steady work.

 

[Alicia88]

It's 94 here. With the nursing, none of my tank tops fit. I was gonna look for some at Walmart but Rue21 next door was having a sidewalk sale. $3 tank tops! Score! Unfortunately, all their sale shorts were high tops and I hate those.

 

[dustydiamond1]

@LTS3 OMG.. this has happened to me.. in the past.. Take this with the circumstances I am under... sorry for being blunt....

You have to decide what is more important to you---either the "false" friendship, or the truth..

sorry to sound so blunt..but, I have been under an ton of emotional stuff...

I have been there, done that...
@LTS Just "Ghost" yourself.... it will be apparent, within a short period of time..

Better you discover this now; rather than later....
Do not respond to e-mails, phone calls.... it will eventually die down...

The most important thing to take out of this experience; is that YOU Cannot TRUST this person....
let it go.. let it die off, on it's own....
You will be a better person, for doing so....Much stronger..and wiser..

Just my opinion... but; what do I know????

You are too good a person, a KIND, CARING, HIGHLY INTELLIGENT PERSON, to take all this crap...It is not worth it... either emotionally and professionally..

(( HUGS ))))

 

[dustydiamond1]

I still feel like I failed her. It took her so long to really warm up to us and get cuddly. She demands pets now and we used to have to go to her. I hope this doesn't ruin her trust.

 

[dustydiamond1]

@LTS3, I once had a person in my life who very clearly had control "issues." She always had to be in charge. If a job had been given to me (by the person who was really in charge) and I was doing it slowly because doing it fast meant doing it wrong she would take it out of my hands and do it herself, fast and wrong. It was obvious that she had some kind of emotional problem that was causing this behavior, so I cut her a lot of slack. Then one day we were talking and I mentioned that she might want to get some therapy and she said to me, "Oh, I know I need therapy, but my parents caused my problems so it's up to them to pay for my therapy. I'll get therapy when my parents pay for it."

Understand, this wasn't because she didn't have enough money to get therapy, it was because she was playing power games with her parents, just as she did with everyone else. When she basically told me that she knew she had problems; she knew what to do about those problems; and she was deliberately choosing not to do anything about them, I suddenly stopped cutting her slack. I stood up to her when she tried to bulldoze people into doing things her way (I tried to do so politely, but was quite willing to be rude when it proved necessary), and whenever possible I began avoiding situations where I would have to interact with her. Eventually she disappeared from my life. I occasionally see her around, but she ignores me and I ignore her.

Margret

 

[dustydiamond1]

We are having hot, humid July & August weather around here in May.

 

[dustydiamond1]

I hope maybe I can end up visiting her once in a while. This woman's first response made me like her immediately. I posted Marcy on the local pet rehoming Facebook page, she commented that she was interested, and messaged me saying that she wouldn't be able to take her until Monday because they'd be going out of town for the weekend and she didn't want to pick her up and immediately leave her alone. So she was already thinking about Marcy's comfort. We messaged back and forth a bit and I told her I wanted to meet her so we'll probably be getting together tomorrow. And then John told me they'd known each other in school and said she'd take good care of her. Quite a coincidence, I guess, but this is a small town so maybe not that much of one, but it still made me feel better. And, I could use a new friend so maybe we can strike up a friendship and I can still see Marcy once in a while. I've been giving her extra cuddles all weekend.
Murphy stole a McDonald's chicken sandwich once when it was left unattended. The weirdo didn't want the chicken. He just pulled it apart and licked off all the mayo. Didn't bother him at all.

I hope you get to visit and the lady becomes a friend. Keep us updated.

 

[dustydiamond1]

Is there a "right" way to cut ties with someone you thought was a friend but turns out not to be? I keep getting screwed over and over again by a person who never tells me anything truthfully and takes advantage when I'm super stressed out and not thinking clearly to push and manipulate me to do things which I end up regretting. I do not want this person in my life anymore. I have not spoken or texted this person in a few weeks now. Guess I'm kind of "ghosting" already. I'm ready to block this person from texting and calling and emailing me if needed.

Block, block, block ASAP. Do not speak to them about it they know what they are doing and know just what buttons to push and what strings to pull to get you to dance to their tune. Enough is enough Good luck and stay strong.

 

[dustydiamond1]

There's several "right" ways. And there's several "wrong" ways. And often what is "right" for two people is "wrong" for two other people, and it can be both "right" and "wrong" at the same time.

@LTS3 From what I've read in your posts, your "right" way with this person is best done by ghosting. Someone good at manipulating and pushing someone into something unwanted will only have a response right back at you when you tell her/him "We're done" that will be pushing into keeping the friendship going - guilt, promises, convincing you that you are the problem in the friendship, fast talking to keep you from thinking straight, etc. As you do seem to be unsure of yourself and passive, the person you describe will have you staying besties by the end of the conversation.

Just disappear. Don't respond to calls/emails/texts. Don't talk of that person to mutual acquaintances, and just kinda shrug and say something non-committal if someone speaks of them.

Btw, welcome back.

 

[segelkatt]

All this hot weather is surely not here in "sunny" Southern California. It has been overcast all day for the last few days, temps never reach 70F and it's drizzling just about every night with temps in the low 50s. Here I thought I'd have corn from my garden for the 4th of July but the corn is only 3 1/2 feet high so that is not going to happen. Tomatoes are small and green and everything but the zucchini is slow as molasses, that is going full blast and I have already had to give some away. If my car was parked outside it would be filthy with the drizzle and then dust settling on it, and as my cat is white it would really show. I am waiting for the sun and warmer temps, I feel like I'm freezing here with the heat on every day after 3 as the temp starts to drop severely at that time. My heating bill is going to be horrendous for this time of year.
Looks like the doctor has finally figured out what has been causing my chronic diarrhea, at least I hope this is it. I had been using enough toilet paper for a family of 5! Seems that my pancreas is not making the enzymes I need to digest my food and the diarrhea has become worse and worse over the years. I won't go into just how bad it had gotten to be, too much info for polite company. So the doc prescribed enzymes that I have to take with every meal and snack (that is really going to cut down on snacking and making me lose even more weight for which I am grateful) and it seems to be working. Before I had to run to the bathroom every time I put anything into my mouth and stay there for half an hour or more which really impacted my social and other life, I did a lot of fasting when I had to do something that took me away from home for hours at a time. And visiting my friend in San Diego meant fasting all day as I certainly did not want to sit in HER bathroom for extended periods of time. Now I hear my guts rumbling like before but I don't have to go. It took only a few days to see results like the doc had said and I am slated for a CT scan on Wednesday to have a good look at my pancreas. Sure hope there is nothing else going on there.

 

[arouetta]

The Target I work at has had a pest problem since I started there and probably long before. Sometimes we've had sugar ants in the fitting room, not a few, but a few hundred in one room with stragglers in adjoining rooms, and it's never the same room. There's sugar ants in the break room too, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot, very rarely none at all. I often see huge black crickets all seasons except winter all over the floor and in the customer bathroom. I've seen huge numbers of roaches outside the building at night and there's roach traps in various places in the employee areas. I've seen what I hope are water bugs and not huge roaches all over the floor (just recently one walked right in front of a guest, I'm glad she didn't look down) and bathroom. Huge spiders in the fitting room, too bad they aren't doing their duty and eating all the bugs.

But last night took the cake. I was using the family bathroom after work (store was closed), I looked down to wipe myself and I saw a tick crawling around the inside of the toilet bowl. I don't want to see ticks at all, and that's a place where I especially do not want to see a tick. Eek!!!

 

[Katie M]

I know quiet cat fights mean they're just playing, but sometimes it's eerily silent

 

[arouetta]

I know quiet cat fights mean they're just playing, but sometimes it's eerily silent

Yeah, I know what you mean. Screaming and blurred movements is real, duking it out like two professional wrestlers is play, but sometimes it looks so serious that you wonder if you lost your sense of hearing.

 

[DreamerRose]

Lily has had hairballs, and the vet gave me some Omega-3 oil to spritz on her food to help her pass the hair. This stuff is horrible; it must be a fish oil. It also spritzes on the countertop when I prepare her food, then it gets on my forearms, which means I carry it around the house. Now everything smells fishy. I've cleaned up the countertops and my arms as well as I could, but the fishy smell is everywhere. I wish I'd never used it. Combing and brushing seems to help the most.

I also gave it to Mingo, just in case, before I realized it was fish oil. He can't tolerate fish or seafood, so he was vomiting all around the living room on the carpets. Of course, he can't vomit on the tile or kitchen floor, so I've been constantly cleaning up vomit in addition to the fishy smell.

What a mess.

 

[Katie M]

Yeah, I know what you mean. Screaming and blurred movements is real, duking it out like two professional wrestlers is play, but sometimes it looks so serious that you wonder if you lost your sense of hearing.

At one point, Charlie had Selene's ear in his mouth. That HAD to have hurt, but she didn't make a sound.

 

[arouetta]

Lily has had hairballs, and the vet gave me some Omega-3 oil to spritz on her food to help her pass the hair. This stuff is horrible; it must be a fish oil. It also spritzes on the countertop when I prepare her food, then it gets on my forearms, which means I carry it around the house. Now everything smells fishy. I've cleaned up the countertops and my arms as well as I could, but the fishy smell is everywhere. I wish I'd never used it. Combing and brushing seems to help the most.

I also gave it to Mingo, just in case, before I realized it was fish oil. He can't tolerate fish or seafood, so he was vomiting all around the living room on the carpets. Of course, he can't vomit on the tile or kitchen floor, so I've been constantly cleaning up vomit in addition to the fishy smell.

What a mess.

Omega 3 often comes from fish because they have so much of it in their system.

I've heard canned pumpkin (not canned pumpkin pie) and Vaseline can also help.

 

[kashmir64]

It has been overcast all day for the last few days, temps never reach 70F and it's drizzling just about every night with temps in the low 50s

I wish it was here. We are currently in a Stage 3 fire restriction. Which means no barbeque or smoking outside of any building. The forests have been closed. And people from Phx. are complaining that they came up here to camp and they want a campfire. The forest is closed, where are you going to camp? Even charcoal has been pulled off the shelves of the stores. But they will find a place, and we will have a major fire, and they will go home.

Makes me want to go to their house in Phx. and start a bonfire in their yard. See how they like it.