- Joined
- Jan 2, 2018
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On Tuesday January 18, 2018 at 1109am my baby Beanie crossed the rainbow bridge. He was 11 years old. He died on the operating room table. About 3 weeks before I noticed he stopped eating. We went to the vet right away, his blood work was in normal range and xrays were negative. We got him eating again but I knew something was up so we had an ultrasound which showed a 3.5cm mass. The doc couldn't tell if it was in his stomach or pancreas. We decided on surgery. The day before surgery I spent cuddling, loving, and playing with my boy. Beanie came to me on April 1, 2007. Some other family returned him to the rescue saying he was too vocal. They had him for 3 nights and decided it was not the right fit. I picked this sweet little boy up and knew he was the right fit for me and my other kitty Merlin. From day 1 Merlin and Beanie were two peas in a pod. I called them book ends because they looked so much alike. Beanie was the most loving, playful, cuddle buddy I have ever seen. People that did not like cats loved Beanie. He was gentle and never hissed, swatter or scratched at anyone or anything. He loved to play fetch and came running whenever I whistled for him. He waited for me at the door and nursed me through a painful injury surgery and recovery. Never leaving my side he purred on my leg like it was his job to fix me. As I am writing this I still cannot believe that my baby is gone. The doc called me about 2 hours after I dropped him off for surgery to tell me that he passed on the table. His little body was filled with cancer. The doc and office staff were truly shocked at the outcome as he was seemingly so strong. He looked and acted perfect. I know now that was all for his mommy. He was riddled with cancer. I still have no idea how a 12 lb animal can have so much strength. I have seen and experienced a great deal in my life. I am a Police Detective in New York City and have seen the worst of things but this loss is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with because for so long it was just me, Merlin and Beanie. Merlin crossed the bridge in 2015 and again Beanie was there to help me. Now with Beanie gone even though I have an amazing new husband and 2 other cats I feel alone. A few days ago I could not sleep so I was looking at all of the kitties that needed homes and I stumbled upon a lil guy named Doc. Doc was abandoned in a dumpster behind a vets office. He was rescued, nursed back to health and put up for adoption. Doc came home to live with us and is helping us all grieve. Doc will never replace my Beanie but I decided that the best way to honor my baby boy was to give another kitty a safe loving home with loving family. Doc is adorable and has brought a smile back to my face again. It is so hard to fall asleep without my Beanie, he will always have a piece of my heart but I know he is no longer in pain and he is with his "brother" Merlin. Many people cannot understand the love between an animal and a person and they do not understand my grief. But my grief is real and it physically hurts. Each passing day, I feel a bit better and I am loving and giving Doc and my other 2 "kids" the best lives possible, it is what I know Beanie would want. He acted as if his sole purpose in life was to make me happy and for 11 years he did. Rest easy my baby boy, mommy will never forget you.