Kitten still hissing and terrified after over a month

[Kwik]

Yeah, you are right. I never expected him to be a lap cat (the idea that we all have in mind of one). I am just worried that he gets very anxious and every interaction we have its like he has to warm up to us before fully relaxing. Also if he is out of the kitchen and catches our eye, he runs back to it. This is what I am worried about, him being so anxious… Also the fact that I cant pet him, at all. I stopped trying because I read it would be better for him to initiate, but him being so anxious makes me think the petting is so far away from happening… it makes me sad cause I dont mind him not being a “traditional” lap cat, but I do wish he interacted with us more, even if it was laying a couple feet from us in the room we were in, which has only happened twice for now…

He will-I assure you,he will....

Have you spoken with your Vet about his high anxiety? Your Vet might be able to help with a very low dose Rx to help along the way-,sometimes a temporary medication can benefit in acclimating a stressed kitty to a new home and a new home with new parents.....maybe a little gabapentin,inquire of your Vet--- there's also many over the counter products as well but I would not recommend anything without suggesting you consult your Vet first

It does not mean they need to be medicated forever, short term ..... can't hurt to ask. Do you have a Feliway diffusers plugged in?Feramone diffusers can also help comfort an anxious kitty-does Boogie like catnip,many kittens don't but it's worth a try

 

[Catl1987]

He will-I assure you,he will....

Have you spoken with your Vet about his high anxiety? Your Vet might be able to help with a very low dose Rx to help along the way-,sometimes a temporary medication can benefit in acclimating a stressed kitty to a new home and a new home with new parents.....maybe a little gabapentin,inquire of your Vet--- there's also many over the counter products as well but I would not recommend anything without suggesting you consult your Vet first

It does not mean they need to be medicated forever, short term ..... can't hurt to ask. Do you have a Feliway diffusers plugged in?Feramone diffusers can also help comfort an anxious kitty-does Boogie like catnip,many kittens don't but it's worth a try

Right! Ill ask the vet about it! I had two feliway diffusers plugged in for the first month, but I didnt really see any difference… Same thing with catnip, no effect on him apparently…

 

[Catl1987]

He will-I assure you,he will....

Have you spoken with your Vet about his high anxiety? Your Vet might be able to help with a very low dose Rx to help along the way-,sometimes a temporary medication can benefit in acclimating a stressed kitty to a new home and a new home with new parents.....maybe a little gabapentin,inquire of your Vet--- there's also many over the counter products as well but I would not recommend anything without suggesting you consult your Vet first

It does not mean they need to be medicated forever, short term ..... can't hurt to ask. Do you have a Feliway diffusers plugged in?Feramone diffusers can also help comfort an anxious kitty-does Boogie like catnip,many kittens don't but it's worth a try

Also yes, we are going to collect Yoda (new kittie) next monday! Hopefully Boogie likes him and they can bond and lean on each other!

 

[Kwik]

Right! Ill ask the vet about it! I had two feliway diffusers plugged in for the first month, but I didnt really see any difference… Same thing with catnip, no effect on him apparently…

Funny,some studies show kittens and ferals to be unaffected by catnip- I really cant agree because I've seen Itty bitty kitties attracted to catnip toys etc.... I imagine it depends on the individual....So far I've not seen any ferals go for catnip- real ferals(which you don't "see "really -lol)

So it may very well attract him later on....I've heard Feliway takes some time to work,a couple or 3 weeks they say.... I can't say I've noticed any significant difference myself BUT I've had them plugged in a couple of weeks prior to bringing in the feral ---Im not going to try NOT using them- lol!!!As a matter of fact I just bought another one to plug in the front of the house,apparently my kitties like the scent because they rub against the immediate area around the plug ins-----

Congrats for adopting another baby- I think Yoda will help Boogie and you as a wonderful addition to the family -pictures,don't forget pictures,dying to see Boogie and Yoda too!

 

[Catl1987]

Funny,some studies show kittens and ferals to be unaffected by catnip- I really cant agree because I've seen Itty bitty kitties attracted to catnip toys etc.... I imagine it depends on the individual....So far I've not seen any ferals go for catnip- real ferals(which you don't "see "really -lol)

So it may very well attract him later on....I've heard Feliway takes some time to work,a couple or 3 weeks they say.... I can't say I've noticed any significant difference myself BUT I've had them plugged in a couple of weeks prior to bringing in the feral ---Im not going to try NOT using them- lol!!!As a matter of fact I just bought another one to plug in the front of the house,apparently my kitties like the scent because they rub against the immediate area around the plug ins-----

Congrats for adopting another baby- I think Yoda will help Boogie and you as a wonderful addition to the family -pictures,don't forget pictures,dying to see Boogie and Yoda too!

I might get more feliway then… And yes! Im excited about Yoda joining our little family, Ill share pictures for sure! In the meantime, heres Boogie hanging in the kitchen!

 

[Kwik]

I might get more feliway then… And yes! Im excited about Yoda joining our little family, Ill share pictures for sure! In the meantime, heres Boogie hanging in the kitchen!

Boogie is adorable,awwww

 

[Fostercatmom_358]

So cute! I can't wait to see Yoda too

 

[Catl1987]

Hello! Here to give a Boogie and Yoda update:
So we brought Yoda a couple of hours ago home. The lady who gave him to us is a cat behaviourist expert and she advised on how to do the introductions… She told us to place Yoda’s carrier in Boogie’s safe room and let Boogie smell him first. As I suspected, however, Boogie ran away the moment I came into the room with the carrier (I think because it was large and he got spooked by it). He ran to the bathroom and hid. At this point Yoda was meowing and desperate to come out of the carrier so we opened it and he inmediately came out and started rubbing against us, purring… He started to explore the house and unfortunately he went straight to the place Boogie was hiding. Boogie hissed at him and looked absolutely terrified. Even peed himself. And then hid again in a corner of the bathroom. Right now he is still there. I left water, food and his litter box there and closed the door to give him some space. The lady told us it would be best to put Boogie back in the safe room because he is clearly not ready to explore the whole house and with Yoda now, his anxiety will only get worse. So now I dont know what to do… I wish he went back to his safe room, cause the bathroom is small and new to him, but Im afraid if I pick him up he will become even more stressed and maybe bite or scratch us. In the meantime, Yoda is the chillest cat ever. As Im typing this he is hanging on our bed, like he has been living here for a year.

 

[Kwik]

Hello! Here to give a Boogie and Yoda update:
So we brought Yoda a couple of hours ago home. The lady who gave him to us is a cat behaviourist expert and she advised on how to do the introductions… She told us to place Yoda’s carrier in Boogie’s safe room and let Boogie smell him first. As I suspected, however, Boogie ran away the moment I came into the room with the carrier (I think because it was large and he got spooked by it). He ran to the bathroom and hid. At this point Yoda was meowing and desperate to come out of the carrier so we opened it and he inmediately came out and started rubbing against us, purring… He started to explore the house and unfortunately he went straight to the place Boogie was hiding. Boogie hissed at him and looked absolutely terrified. Even peed himself. And then hid again in a corner of the bathroom. Right now he is still there. I left water, food and his litter box there and closed the door to give him some space. The lady told us it would be best to put Boogie back in the safe room because he is clearly not ready to explore the whole house and with Yoda now, his anxiety will only get worse. So now I dont know what to do… I wish he went back to his safe room, cause the bathroom is small and new to him, but Im afraid if I pick him up he will become even more stressed and maybe bite or scratch us. In the meantime, Yoda is the chillest cat ever. As Im typing this he is hanging on our bed, like he has been living here for a year.

Small is fine,he'll feel very safe I'm a smaller space-no worries there,I've had ferals brought indoors in cages no doubt much smaller than your bathroom to help them overcome the sheer terror of the sights & sounds of a house

A small space is better ,and really no hiding place when you go in there to sit with him,talk to him and pet him after he's calmed down and feels safe..... When cats are terrified the more space they have is not better,small spaces are good

When he's comfortable you can leave the door open for him to come out and into the safe room and he'll get to smell Yodas scent all over it- while Yoda is maybe in your room but not yet in a csrrier in that room with Boogie-scent before sight---its a process,don't be discouraged.....

 

[Kwik]

And it sounds like Yoda will be a great addition to the family-once Boogie gets familiar with him Im sure Yoda will have a good influence over him..... cats observe and watching other confident cats with humans is very beneficial...... Let Boogie move at his own pace,he just isn't ready for exploring yet-----that's okay,he'll watch Yoda playing and it will peak his interest and curiosity after he settles down

 

[Catl1987]

And it sounds like Yoda will be a great addition to the family-once Boogie gets familiar with him Im sure Yoda will have a good influence over him..... cats observe and watching other confident cats with humans is very beneficial...... Let Boogie move at his own pace,he just isn't ready for exploring yet-----that's okay,he'll watch Yoda playing and it will peak his interest and curiosity after he settles down

Thank you! It made me feel better that Yoda didn't really react to Boogie hissing and getting all puffy! He just turned around and left, like he wasn't interested. Hopefully that gives Boogie the message that he is not a danger!

 

[Meowmee]

Hello all, this is probably going to be a long post.
I took in a feral 2 month old kitten a little over a month ago. I saw him wandering around our house for a couple of weeks, no signs of mom or other litter mates… so I set a carrier with food inside and he got in. After that, I took him inside and prepared a room for him with carrier, food, water, toys and a litter box. He was in that room for two weeks and I would visit everyday, three, four times a day and just hang with him, read to him, did the eye blinking thing… From day one he ate and used the litter box normally, although never when me or my partner where around. After those two weeks, I left the door of his room open and he explored the kitchen, which is the room right beside the one he was in. All of this exploring happened and still does at night or when we are not in the house.
So far Ive managed to play with him with da bird type of toys and got him to eat treats from my hand. If I try to pet him, he hisses non stop, even though If I do pet him he eventually relaxes and even falls asleep.
The thing is, Im starting to get worried. Ive read everywhere that is easier for kittens to adjust but with him, its very hard to tell if we are making any progress at all. I also dont know how to approach him anymore. Im trying to give him space, but im scared he will never socialise if I dont force the petting and the physical contact. I am scared that I am always going to live with a cat who seems to hate us. On the first week of having him we took him to the vet and they told us he had herpesvirus, which meant we had to give him antibiotics and different medications. Weve had to take him to the vet because of this 5 times in a month. Its frustrating because i feel like that is traumatizing him even more, if possible!
Please help me, he is my first cat and I am so lost. I do not wish for a lap cat, I just want him ti be comfortable and okay with our presence without the constant hissing and looking terrified.
thank you!

I think in time he will relax more. I am not sure why herpes would need for him to go 5 x in one month. Can you reduce the number of visits? That could help him be less stressed.

 

[Meowmee]

Hello! Here to give a Boogie and Yoda update:
So we brought Yoda a couple of hours ago home. The lady who gave him to us is a cat behaviourist expert and she advised on how to do the introductions… She told us to place Yoda’s carrier in Boogie’s safe room and let Boogie smell him first. As I suspected, however, Boogie ran away the moment I came into the room with the carrier (I think because it was large and he got spooked by it). He ran to the bathroom and hid. At this point Yoda was meowing and desperate to come out of the carrier so we opened it and he inmediately came out and started rubbing against us, purring… He started to explore the house and unfortunately he went straight to the place Boogie was hiding. Boogie hissed at him and looked absolutely terrified. Even peed himself. And then hid again in a corner of the bathroom. Right now he is still there. I left water, food and his litter box there and closed the door to give him some space. The lady told us it would be best to put Boogie back in the safe room because he is clearly not ready to explore the whole house and with Yoda now, his anxiety will only get worse. So now I dont know what to do… I wish he went back to his safe room, cause the bathroom is small and new to him, but Im afraid if I pick him up he will become even more stressed and maybe bite or scratch us. In the meantime, Yoda is the chillest cat ever. As Im typing this he is hanging on our bed, like he has been living here for a year.

Usually the best intro is to take the new cat and put them in a room and then do scent swapping until the old cat gets used to the new scent etc. It’s good that Yoda is a calm cat because that will help Boogie

 

[Catl1987]

I think in time he will relax more. I am not sure why herpes would need for him to go 5 x in one month. Can you reduce the number of visits? That could help him be less stressed.

The thing is when I first took him to the vet they didnt see the herpes, just that he had a scratch in his left eye. We had to put eyedrops in it for a couple of days and come again the following week to see if he had healed. After those two visits, he had a flare up and I noticed he was making noises whenever he breathed… So I took him in again (third time) and vet confirmed he was positive in herpesvirus and had pneumonia because of it. So then we started giving him antibiotics and had to go to the vet two more times to check that his lungs were all clear.

 

[Catl1987]

And it sounds like Yoda will be a great addition to the family-once Boogie gets familiar with him Im sure Yoda will have a good influence over him..... cats observe and watching other confident cats with humans is very beneficial...... Let Boogie move at his own pace,he just isn't ready for exploring yet-----that's okay,he'll watch Yoda playing and it will peak his interest and curiosity after he settles down

Hello all!
Boogie and Yoda update:
After Boogie was in the bathroom for a couple of hours, he was noticeably more calm. I gave him one of Yodas toys that had his scent and he played with it, chewed it and licked it. The lady from the shelter recommended us to open the bathroom door and see what Boogie did. He came out inmediately and ate some treats. After that he went to the living room and saw Yoda again. This time, instead of hissing and getting puffy, he growled for a minute or two. It sounded like he was cursing at all of us . Yoda on the other hand remained chill, just looked at him, then looked up, turned around and left. Boogie then went to hide under the couch but I managed to lure him out with treats just a couple of minutes later and his body language was pretty relaxed. Right now he is back in his safe room, the one we put him in when we first got him. This morning we are doing the feces swap, to see if he slowly gets used to the smell. Wish us luck. Yesterday it was nerve-wrecking. Made me question whether bringing Yoda in was the right choice. I am so scared Boogie is going to attack him. Lets see how today goes…

 

[Kwik]

Hello all!
Boogie and Yoda update:
After Boogie was in the bathroom for a couple of hours, he was noticeably more calm. I gave him one of Yodas toys that had his scent and he played with it, chewed it and licked it. The lady from the shelter recommended us to open the bathroom door and see what Boogie did. He came out inmediately and ate some treats. After that he went to the living room and saw Yoda again. This time, instead of hissing and getting puffy, he growled for a minute or two. It sounded like he was cursing at all of us . Yoda on the other hand remained chill, just looked at him, then looked up, turned around and left. Boogie then went to hide under the couch but I managed to lure him out with treats just a couple of minutes later and his body language was pretty relaxed. Right now he is back in his safe room, the one we put him in when we first got him. This morning we are doing the feces swap, to see if he slowly gets used to the smell. Wish us luck. Yesterday it was nerve-wrecking. Made me question whether bringing Yoda in was the right choice. I am so scared Boogie is going to attack him. Lets see how today goes…

It's going to be fine,you're there to supervise & intervene if needed- bringing Yoda home was a wonderful decision,don't second guess yourself- only one day and there's progress,patience my friend-relax,learn from little Yoda-chill,lol

Just don't force anything,let Boogie have his space and move at his own pace

Personally I don't force the litterbox sharing ,I always let them have their own to start with so I have reliable litter box users,when they are familiar with each others scents & territory they are highly likely to share litter boxs- have one for each plus one extra- rule of thumb,even if they decide to all use one box they should have other options to avoid any issues

My newest addition(5th,integrating with 4 other residents)..... he had his own litter box for some time, 2 days ago he discovered there are more and is sharing nicely

 

[Meowmee]

Hello all!
Boogie and Yoda update:
After Boogie was in the bathroom for a couple of hours, he was noticeably more calm. I gave him one of Yodas toys that had his scent and he played with it, chewed it and licked it. The lady from the shelter recommended us to open the bathroom door and see what Boogie did. He came out inmediately and ate some treats. After that he went to the living room and saw Yoda again. This time, instead of hissing and getting puffy, he growled for a minute or two. It sounded like he was cursing at all of us . Yoda on the other hand remained chill, just looked at him, then looked up, turned around and left. Boogie then went to hide under the couch but I managed to lure him out with treats just a couple of minutes later and his body language was pretty relaxed. Right now he is back in his safe room, the one we put him in when we first got him. This morning we are doing the feces swap, to see if he slowly gets used to the smell. Wish us luck. Yesterday it was nerve-wrecking. Made me question whether bringing Yoda in was the right choice. I am so scared Boogie is going to attack him. Lets see how today goes…

I am sure it will be fine. It’s only day 1

 

[kittychick]

Glad to see Boogie was really making progress! I've socialized lots of new cats w/scaredy cats, and slow is the key. You really don't want Boogie to feel any more anxious then he needs to - especially after SO much progress. I could kick myself I couldn't get on earlier to advise (we do super slow intros - esp when one or both are scared/just beginning to socialize - sometimes over a month before actually letting them be full face-to-face). But you've done as much as you knew to do, even working with the shelter on intros, but think of it this way - - Boogie was finally feeling more like your house (esp the kitchen and "his" room) was his safe space. And now he's confused and probably feels like his territory isn't his anymore. Not that it can't end up just fine - Yoda could likely end up being a good influence. One thing I know - and I make this mistake often STILL - is that it's easy to go from working with the one who needs your quiet time in spaces he feels comfortable, and now you're likely spending a large portion of the time you previously spent with him to spend time with your new little one (understandable!). So I'd make sure you're still spending time with Boogie ALONE - without Yoda. Have you tried a Cat Dancer to play? (It's basically a long wire with cardboard on the end - but we find that even barely socialized fosters LOVE it - partially the way it moves, plus it allows you to give Boogie space as he plays with you)

If you can maybe take a step back - not letting Yoda into Boogie's room for now - letting that stay "his safe space." And when you open the door - just do it a crack, putting stoppers (or heavy books etc) so that they can only touch noses, no more. Once that's a "non-issue" for Boogie, you can put up something like a baby gate (watching constantly as they can climb right over!) where they can see each other and sniff and reach out, but can't hurt each other (and keeps Yoda out of Bookie's space). Then I move to feeding both on either side of the baby gate.

If you can't (or don't want to) take a step back with Boogie, I'd at least make an effort to make sure for now that Boogie still has his own "safe space" and give him as much - or more - of your time and attention. Hopefully it won't be long till Boogie's just as comfy as Yoda!!

Keep us posted - and more pics please!

 

[Catl1987]

Glad to see Boogie was really making progress! I've socialized lots of new cats w/scaredy cats, and slow is the key. You really don't want Boogie to feel any more anxious then he needs to - especially after SO much progress. I could kick myself I couldn't get on earlier to advise (we do super slow intros - esp when one or both are scared/just beginning to socialize - sometimes over a month before actually letting them be full face-to-face). But you've done as much as you knew to do, even working with the shelter on intros, but think of it this way - - Boogie was finally feeling more like your house (esp the kitchen and "his" room) was his safe space. And now he's confused and probably feels like his territory isn't his anymore. Not that it can't end up just fine - Yoda could likely end up being a good influence. One thing I know - and I make this mistake often STILL - is that it's easy to go from working with the one who needs your quiet time in spaces he feels comfortable, and now you're likely spending a large portion of the time you previously spent with him to spend time with your new little one (understandable!). So I'd make sure you're still spending time with Boogie ALONE - without Yoda. Have you tried a Cat Dancer to play? (It's basically a long wire with cardboard on the end - but we find that even barely socialized fosters LOVE it - partially the way it moves, plus it allows you to give Boogie space as he plays with you)

If you can maybe take a step back - not letting Yoda into Boogie's room for now - letting that stay "his safe space." And when you open the door - just do it a crack, putting stoppers (or heavy books etc) so that they can only touch noses, no more. Once that's a "non-issue" for Boogie, you can put up something like a baby gate (watching constantly as they can climb right over!) where they can see each other and sniff and reach out, but can't hurt each other (and keeps Yoda out of Bookie's space). Then I move to feeding both on either side of the baby gate.

If you can't (or don't want to) take a step back with Boogie, I'd at least make an effort to make sure for now that Boogie still has his own "safe space" and give him as much - or more - of your time and attention. Hopefully it won't be long till Boogie's just as comfy as Yoda!!

Keep us posted - and more pics please!

 

[Catl1987]

Thank you much for your answer! Its been a busy week but Im glad to say I wont be needing to try your advice because Boogie and Yoda are officially best friends! Ill leave here the steps we followed, in case anyone is going through the same thing and needs to hear other’s experiences!
- First we placed Yoda’s carrier in the room Boogie was in hopes he would smell him. As I posted, this was an absolute fail and Boogie ran off the room as soon as the carrier was placed on the floor.
- Yoda was dying to get out of the carrier, so we opened it for him and he inmediately came out, started rubbing on everything… A few minutes later they had theur first encounter, which was absolutely nerve-wrecking. Boogie howled, spit, got all puffy at Yoda… At this point he was in the bathroom so we closed the door and left him some time to relax there only coming in to feed him.
- That afternoon we opened the door again, always following the advice of the cat behaviourist, and they had their second encountered in the living room. Kinf of the same thing happened, Boogie howled like he was cursing at us and looked ready for an attack. Luckily Yoda is the chillest cat ever to exist so hus reaction was just to turn away from him and leave.
- After this, we were advised to put Boogie back in his safe room and start the scent swapping. We exchanged feces, gave Boogie some toys that had Yoda’s scent in it and at this point we could tell he was starting to relax, play and look more at ease.
- Next day we opened the door for the first time again. i was terrified they were going to get into a fight. This is how we did it: I first came in the room with Boogie and started playing with him with da bird, then when he was relaxed, my partner opened the door to let Yoda in. They spent around 5 minutes together. Boogie hissed at him but looked considerably more relaxed and even curious.
- After a couple hours on that same day, we dis the dame thing again. This time they spent around 15 minutes together. Boogie only hissed at him when Yoda got very closed, but looked curious and followed him around the room for the most part. During these times we made sure to always positively reinforce theur interactions with treats, during and after they happened.
- Still on the same day at night, we opened the door and this time Boogie made the first move, smell Yodas nose and followed him everywhere.
- Next day we decided to open the door and since then theyve become unseparable. They do everything together and Boogie is becoming cheekier and much more confident! Now he lays on the couch with us, which he never did before and even sleeps next to Yoda in our bedroom. We are so happy we made the decision of adopting a second car, and I can tell we are the only ones that are excited! Boogie looks the happiest since we brought him home and Yoda has adapted wonderfully and is a little cuddle bug.
Thank you so much for the advice!!!!