Spay Guilt

[FurmiliarCattitude]

I found a stray a couple of months ago and although I had no intentions of keeping her she wormed her way into my heart. When I took her in initially she was unspayed and has gone through heat on and off unfortunately. Today I dropped her off to get spayed and I feel so guilty knowing that she’s scared and around people she doesn’t know who are causing her pain that she doesn’t know is good for her. I know it’s for the best but I’m wracked with guilt. Any words of support?

 

[verna davies]

You are doing the right thing for her even though she might not realise it. Its surprising how quickly they bounce back. Just spoil her, give her plenty of love and attention and stop beating yourself up. Post a photo of her if you are able. What have you named her?

 

[kittyluv387]

Mmm no. Girls can get uterine infection if you let them go through many heat cycles without getting mated. It is nasty and painful for the cat. You're doing her a world of good.

 

[FurmiliarCattitude]

Her name is Sophie! I know it’s the best thing for her ultimately but I still feel bad all of my other pets were fixed before I got them so this is my first time going through this process and I didn’t realize how bad I’d feel about.

 

[verna davies]

I had both of my girls done. One didn't bother even having a collar and the other acted as if she had been to a holiday camp. Keeping her from jumping and being quiet may be a problem so good luck with that.
Sophie is lovely, beautiful coat
Let us know how you get on.

 

[ItsMaryann]

Don’t worry! My cats have always bounced back so fast after being spayed. She’ll be fine!

 

[white shadow]

.
Do ensure you get enough pain control medication for 3-4 days for her !

Look what happened here: Kitten Crazy After Spay - see post #3
.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Although things are rough for her now, there will be no having litter after litter of kittens doomed to short, desperate lives. There will be no more risk of pyrometria or other uterine infections, of death due to breach birth, of mammary cancer and a couple of other nasty hormone-driven cancers. And once the initial soreness has gone, she will be a MUCH happier cat. Sometimes, we have to grit our teeth in the "now" so that we can get to a better future. Grit your teeth. You are doing Something Wonderful for this girl, even if she doesn't know that.

 

[Kflowers]

My current cat used her time in the hospital to pick up swear words from the other cats. She went in not knowing any, she was a 4 week old orphan when we got her, and left knowing at least 20. She was fine the minute she leapt our of her carrier back home. Well, she was hungry, but fine.

 

[1 bruce 1]

My current cat used her time in the hospital to pick up swear words from the other cats. She went in not knowing any, she was a 4 week old orphan when we got her, and left knowing at least 20. She was fine the minute she leapt our of her carrier back home. Well, she was hungry, but fine.

@Lilbashful , consider it a test run at the vets for if, in the bad event she would ever be injured or sick and need to be hospitalized that she'll be used to it. She'll be home, safe, sound, and like K Kflowers cat, sassy as ever in no time.
It's like a kid that doesn't want an operation (tonsils, etc.) or a kid that doesn't want to go to the dentist. They hate it, we hate that they hate it but we're the adults and it's our job to do what's best for them even if they are scared.
The back up plan: spoil her rotten when she gets home with her favorite foods, treats, all the attention her Highness deserves and when she's healed up enough, toys.
I've been "lucky" enough to live with cats that are in heat before, and it's miserable. They never stop yowling, never stop trying to get outside, spend their time at the windows and aren't nearly as content or happy as a cat that isn't driven by, um..."that." The cat I had at the time dropped significant weight because she refused to eat, she just wanted to scream at the windows and try to rush out doors. That's not a happy cat.
Dogs at least go in and out of season and when they're out, they might as well be spayed. Cats are in much more than out, and it can cause all kinds of problems.
You'll both be happier in the long run, I promise.

 

[Kflowers]

And 1 bruce 1 doesn't mention the most amazing thing of all. That morning when you walk into the living room, open the curtains and see 6 or 7 tom cats hanging on the screen saying, "Hi, there, babe."

 

[1 bruce 1]

And 1 bruce 1 doesn't mention the most amazing thing of all. That morning when you walk into the living room, open the curtains and see 6 or 7 tom cats hanging on the screen saying, "Hi, there, babe."

That's a sight. When Baby Girl went in we had this beat up looking guy show up that was acting like the Fonz ("heyyyyyyyy") and she was pretty much plastered to the window. We did feed him (we won't turn a cat away, and the plan was TNR and the rest was up to him) but she was spayed and before he was trusting enough to enter a live trap, he moved on after a week or so.
I can't help but mention this cats skull was humongus. It looked like an over inflated basketball so I called him Basketball Head.

 

[Kflowers]

Oh yes!!! One of Sweet Gum's beaus had the most enormous head I've ever seen. Used it like a club when he had discussion with the other fellas. Would have loved to add him to the house, but Sweet Gum's dog was against her having boy cats in the house.

 

[PushPurrCatPaws]

Her name is Sophie! I know it’s the best thing for her ultimately but I still feel bad all of my other pets were fixed before I got them so this is my first time going through this process and I didn’t realize how bad I’d feel about.

Sophie is a beauty!

 

[1 bruce 1]

Oh yes!!! One of Sweet Gum's beaus had the most enormous head I've ever seen. Used it like a club when he had discussion with the other fellas. Would have loved to add him to the house, but Sweet Gum's dog was against her having boy cats in the house.

Like a club...
I'm starting to believe that men are every bit as weird as women say.

Baby Girl wasn't "in" long, but it was hell. She never shut up, yowled, we had complaints, we tried to shut her up and keep her in a small room away from windows (made it worse)...
She came in like someone snapped her fingers. One night, she was a cute kitten and the next morning she was, well....courting. Loudly.
Once she was spayed, she turned into the most adorable lap cat that turned
"never shuts up" to "Won't take 'go away' for an answer" and she's happy, sassy, and won't be adding to the kitten boom.

 

[FurmiliarCattitude]

Thanks for the support guys. It made me feel a lot better. My little loaf is back home now and conked out. No cone of shame yet but I’m keeping an eye out for licking.

 

[1 bruce 1]

Thanks for the support guys. It made me feel a lot better. My little loaf is back home now and conked out. No cone of shame yet but I’m keeping an eye out for licking.

Let her rest. Check the incision daily or more if you can, and be glad she's home safe and sound.
In a few days you'll probably be asking us how to keep her down while she heals, because she "feels fine!"
They're tough little nuggets. Enjoy her!

 

[jen]

I trapped an old feral cat and had him neutered today and while I have neutered many many cats who weren't my personal pets, I still have a sense of betrayal to him lol. He is like some wise old street cat and I swoop in and betray his trust and neuter him and now he is in a trap in my bathroom recovering. I am SO happy it got done but I feel for the guy. I included a picture for you to see how cute he is. I pet him for the first time today but he is still a bit drugged from the surgery. Also holy crap his cheeks are HUGE they are like golf balls under there. All his skin is thick and scabbed.

 

[verna davies]

@Lilbashful . she will be more alert tomorrow but if you have a cone, put it on her tonight just in case. Keep an eye on the wound and if you have any concerns, send a photo to your vet or post one on this thread.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Good work. She'll be MUCH happier now! My Hekitty was a kinda late spay, and I vividly remember her prowling the house, shrieking, "Let meowt, let MEOWT! NEOW, NEOW, NEOW!" And the parade of willing toms I had to wade through at the front door (and their "signatures" that had to be scrubbed OFF of the front door). Of course, I had "the talk" with her, you know, when you say, "But, Sweetie, those tomcats will promise you the moon and stars, but all you will be left with is kittens. And those toms won't be there to help you clean them and feed them and teach them how to cat. They'll be off with some other willing girl." And she says back to you, "I know, Mama, but...LET MEOWT!" None of that for you now!