Scared semi feral stray cat hiding for a month

[Kwik]

I think I'm worried cause he has hurt me badly to a point I needed stitches. It was quite traumatic, and now I'm hesitant to pet him when he's standing up or out of the box. I never had the problem when he was an outdoor cat so it's definitely cause of that experience. I've purchased a pair of animal handling gloves so maybe that would help me build up my courage as well.

I find most cats are quite frightened by gloves and anything thin enough to be less threatening is like no protection at sll-:with gloves you really have to rub your scent over quite well- still,imo they are do not get the animal used to the hand,like using a brush or some type of extension for those fearful of getting scratched- seems it doesn't make the transition to a person's touch any easier but I've never worn gloves in my life except for birds so I can only comment on what I've seen others try to do

You don't have to be in a hurry to pet him-you can wait until you see he is ready & willing and you have more confidence - take your time,brushing against your legs is a good start and graze as the opportunity arises--- it's still very early on and you shouldn't keep comparing his outside behavior to inside,it has nothing to do with inside or outside and everything to do with the self assuredness and comfortability of a cat familiar with an established territory

Yes,here I go again- environment & surroundings take president over relationships

 

[charbby]

He doesn't brush against my leg. He doesn't really approach me unless there's food. I think I'm also a bit frightened if he gets too close. But maybe I'll try again. He's as scared of me as I am of him I think. So we both need to be brave haha.

Maybe I'll try standing up when I feed him; I'm always sitting down and he gets a bit scared to when I'm standing. He has progressed a lot and it's very apparent that he needs to slowly be pushed out of his comfort zone to progress. Whenever he does, he does really well. I think on occasion I've heard him purring whenever I brush him.

 

[tabbytom]

He doesn't brush against my leg. He doesn't really approach me unless there's food. I think I'm also a bit frightened if he gets too close. But maybe I'll try again. He's as scared of me as I am of him I think. So we both need to be brave haha.

Maybe I'll try standing up when I feed him; I'm always sitting down and he gets a bit scared to when I'm standing. He has progressed a lot and it's very apparent that he needs to slowly be pushed out of his comfort zone to progress. Whenever he does, he does really well. I think on occasion I've heard him purring whenever I brush him.

Cats can sense fear in us which radiate to them like 'danger'. The more calm you are, the more calm he'll be. If you choose to be rough with him, just for example, he'll defend himself and when he is at that point, all he cares about is defending himself even though he use to be a cuddle cat.

Always try to calm him down before you feed him, talk to him and praise him for waiting for his food and assure him everything's fine and you are just getting him food.
Even if it's not feeding time, sit near him and play with him but always have a toy to distract him once you see warning signs from him like his ears going backwards and he starts aa defensive stance and slowly move away from him and do not engage him at this moment.

I see that he just need a little more time to get over the whole thing. Just be patient with him.

 

[Kwik]

He doesn't brush against my leg. He doesn't really approach me unless there's food. I think I'm also a bit frightened if he gets too close. But maybe I'll try again. He's as scared of me as I am of him I think. So we both need to be brave haha.

Maybe I'll try standing up when I feed him; I'm always sitting down and he gets a bit scared to when I'm standing. He has progressed a lot and it's very apparent that he needs to slowly be pushed out of his comfort zone to progress. Whenever he does, he does really well. I think on occasion I've heard him purring whenever I brush him.

So cute in his little box- just adorable

But really,relax because there's no rush- you're BOTH learning to trust each other,both will learn you pose no threat....

I always stand and bend at the waste,keeping my hands low to the ground....they get used to my natural upright position and are not afraid when I approach,the hands are always there and when they finally do approach I don't have to reach out or come at them,it's easy to graze( like cats do to one another)

I used to sit on the ground and spend lots of time on the cats level but now if I did that I can't get up- rofl I'm looking at how relaxed he's checking you out,perky ears ,drowsy eyes,lil paws turned in- resting haunches----perfect!

Don't worry so much,all in good time

 

[charbby]

I think I only interact with him when he's in the box cause I feel a bit safer. I'm trying to be brave myself as well

 

[Kwik]

I understand you are not comfortable- the box is his safe place though,right? When a cat is in their safe place is the place that it's best not to interact ( physically or eye contact) then it's not such a safe space,see?

Of course while he's in there looking out and watching you/listening you can sit in his room,talk and just be that reassuring and familiar person -your opportunity is around the food dish,the idea is for him to come out to eat and with you there,gettijg closer and closer until eventually he no longer sees your pose no threat- he knows he can safely retreat to the place you will not get to him

Timmy no longer retreats to his enclosure cubby,part of the reason is because it was off limits to me until about 2months ago- when outside noises or people would frighten him and he ran to his safe space I'd go over to the cubby,pet him and coax him out- then his absolute safe space was not "absolute" anymore - then when he'd be frightened and start to run for the cubby I'd just have to stand and approach ahd he'd turn around to come back- I was replacing the security of the safe space- now he runs to me if he's frightened and he's found a new " safe space"( his bed) I barely ever pet my cats in their safe space so they know they can have their " alone time" when they want it and it's not necessary to hide

Hope thst helps to understand what build their confidence and trust in you- cats instinctively know to respect each others boundaries,that's why they can co- exist in an established territory so well..the only thing that really rocks that boat is hormones but that's not in the equation

You'll both trust one another in time- it's highly likely you'll be together for at least 15 wonderful years together so what's a year compared to that?People don't even move in together in one or two months,right? Lol They have to get to know one another

 

[charbby]

He's okay with me brushing and petting him in his box. I'm trying to stand up more now so he'll get used to it and realise it's not a threat. It also better on my knees haha

 

[charbby]

Oh I don't force him out of his box. I have lured him out a while back to show him that it isn't scary outside the box. But now he comes out very willingly. He just likes to sleep and hang in there; cats and their boxes

 

[Kwik]

He's okay with me brushing and petting him in his box. I'm trying to stand up more now so he'll get used to it and realise it's not a threat. It also better on my knees haha

I'm jealous ,really want new knees,lol

 

[charbby]

Got that tail up! He still hisses at me when I move too quickly? Not super sure but he hissed at me twice today but it was immediately followed by a miao. Something's triggering him but I think he gets over it quickly so it's probably just a knee jerk reaction. Next step is to get him not to be scared of my husband.

 

[tabbytom]

Got that tail up! He still hisses at me when I move too quickly? Not super sure but he hissed at me twice today but it was immediately followed by a miao. Something's triggering him but I think he gets over it quickly so it's probably just a knee jerk reaction. Next step is to get him not to be scared of my husband.

That's great!

Try moving slower and see if he hisses at you. This is just to test to confirm his action but after the hiss he meows at you is probably like he's saying 'Hey, you gave me a shock!'

 

[charbby]

He keeps rubbing his cheeks against corners tho, to a point I think it's excessive. I think he's itching but idk how to solve that. As an outside cat, one of his feeders would wipe him every day. I'm not sure if I can do it as he isn't super comfortable with me yet. I'm also a bit scared to be bitten or scratched. Maybe I'll just leave it for now.

 

[Kwik]

He keeps rubbing his cheeks against corners tho, to a point I think it's excessive. I think he's itching but idk how to solve that. As an outside cat, one of his feeders would wipe him every day. I'm not sure if I can do it as he isn't super comfortable with me yet. I'm also a bit scared to be bitten or scratched. Maybe I'll just leave it for now.

My Graycie is a cheek rubber- it's marking with pheromones and it feels good,especially becausd it's " mine,mine,mine"lol

I wouldn't worry about it,it just feels soooo good and they comfort themselves that way-Graycie is timid,,thsts about as bold as she gets

 

[tabbytom]

 

[charbby]

Why does he like to rub his cheek on things when I'm around? I can see from the camera that he doesn't do it when he's alone

Another picture of him but this time with his favorite mouse

 

[tabbytom]

Why does he like to rub his cheek on things when I'm around? I can see from the camera that he doesn't do it when he's alone

Another picture of him but this time with his favorite mouse

He’s just probably making scent marking or he could be grooming himself. My boy does that to his tunnel too and also he uses this to groom his cheeks.

 

[ImaRobot]

My girl I just adopted also does this. As I pet her she'll walk off and start rubbing her face against various area's of the room. If anything, I'd just take it as them being comfortable with your presence.

 

[charbby]

I realised whiskers' fur is a bit clumpy? Not matted but I think it sticks together cause it's oily. He wasn't like this as an outside cat; I suppose it's cause he does hang out in a light rain sometimes and gets wiped down by his feeder. I am trying to wipe him down without him getting too upset. What else can help in lieu of a bath? Dry shampoo? Any scent free ones to recommended

 

[charbby]

Photo of him being a happy cat in his box

 

[Kwik]

Photo of him being a happy cat in his box

He looks content in his box- I don't understand how he is in light rain indoors?

I've been working with animals( not just cats) for over 4 decades - the only time I'd bathe an animal is if they fell in a puddle of oil or something of that nature..... You keep fur bearing animals clean by brushing them,their natural oils cleanse their fur as you brush and brush and brush..

Dogs often get into things that are a terrific mess and it's much easier to bathe them but cats? Cats are meticulously clean-

Did you know that humans didn't always shampoo there hair? How that came about I barely remember but in Sicily I remember watching my great grandmother combing her hair with a very fine tooth comb,her hair was to her knees and smelled so heavenly,never shampood it in her entire life- the natural oils cleanse the hair..... you would think it'd be greasy but that's because you use shampoo and throw the chemistry all off- if you stopped using shampoo and could get past the greasy stage after a month of combing you'd have hair cleaner that you could ever imagine( just some trivia,look it up I'm sure you can find how shampoo got started)

Anyway,brush Whiskers,he will love it- mine go crazy when I say " brush" and they are spotless and there's not fur everywhere- they are groomed every other day

Cute little article
Medieval Hair Washing Myths Busted — SnappyDragon Studios