Maybe not the correct place for this but I feel like writing this makes me feel a bit better.. My sister called me about an hour ago and told me that Grandpa (mom's dad) had died few hours ago. It was not a surprise, he was hospitalized nearly 2 weeks ago and we knew he wasn't coming back.
We weren't very close, specially not in the last few years because he had suffered a stroke and hardly recognized any of us who he didn't see all the time. He is the first closely related person in my family who has died while I've existed. All my other grandparents are still alive. Might sound odd, but I didn't really feel much anything, maybe a bit relief when I heard about this. I'm more worried of his cat.
My mom had been taking care of him so he was able to live at his home pretty much until the end. Mom also stresses very easily about everything and obviously her dad having to be hospitalized was a major blow for her. Maybe she felt she had failed? It lead to her having kind of a breakdown this morning and she was also in a hospital for few hours (way too high blood pressure, and she's been on medication because of it for years). After she got home, her dad passed. She just called me to tell me, I told her that my sister had just called also. But this is what makes it hard: her voice..I haven't heard her sound like that for over 20 years.. It was so hard to hold back the tears when I listened to her sadness and pain. I'm surprised, since I didn't know I care so much about her, we haven't exactly been the most perfect family ever..
Is it normal not to grieve over someone's death (I feel guilty because the death doesn't really bother me, he's my grandpa after all), but to be more devastated because of the way the death has broken someone else's world (my mom's in this case)?
Yeah, i'm just rambling. Just had to wrote it down.
We weren't very close, specially not in the last few years because he had suffered a stroke and hardly recognized any of us who he didn't see all the time. He is the first closely related person in my family who has died while I've existed. All my other grandparents are still alive. Might sound odd, but I didn't really feel much anything, maybe a bit relief when I heard about this. I'm more worried of his cat.
My mom had been taking care of him so he was able to live at his home pretty much until the end. Mom also stresses very easily about everything and obviously her dad having to be hospitalized was a major blow for her. Maybe she felt she had failed? It lead to her having kind of a breakdown this morning and she was also in a hospital for few hours (way too high blood pressure, and she's been on medication because of it for years). After she got home, her dad passed. She just called me to tell me, I told her that my sister had just called also. But this is what makes it hard: her voice..I haven't heard her sound like that for over 20 years.. It was so hard to hold back the tears when I listened to her sadness and pain. I'm surprised, since I didn't know I care so much about her, we haven't exactly been the most perfect family ever..
Is it normal not to grieve over someone's death (I feel guilty because the death doesn't really bother me, he's my grandpa after all), but to be more devastated because of the way the death has broken someone else's world (my mom's in this case)?
Yeah, i'm just rambling. Just had to wrote it down.