Caught A Feral Cat... And I Need Some Advice

[kimmer3d]

Hello everyone,

A the start of the month, i saw a black and white cat around my front porch. I knew she wasn't my neighbors and she looked thin and hungry. I went out. She ran away. But i left food for her. And two minutes later she came back and ate the food. Fast forward to me contacting the local cat rescue and they told me that this was one of their cats, Lily, who had been caught near a barn and spayed. They had her in a garage and one day ran away. She was on her own for 2 months. I started to stress. I live in Canada. And the winters are brutal. Thirty below zero Celsius is common. And i live in the country with lots of coyotes, fishers, and a busy main road. They told me she was wild and they didn't know if she was even adoptable. They couldn't take her back, seeing as they are overwhelmed with other cats. They asked me if i was willing to try and catch her since she was now coming every day for some food. So i said yes, and they brought me a trap. I caught her in 5 minutes. No kidding. Anyway, i had a room set up for her, away from my dogs upstairs where the dogs are not allowed. I caught her on October 9th and things were moving well. She would come out and eat with me sitting on the floor. She even began chasing cheese balls i'd made for her, with her tail up in the air and coming back for more. I was very pleased. I couldn't touch her, but i thought we were making some progress.

The vet gave me a pill for parasites, but i knew she had fleas. Having dogs in the house, i had to get rid of the fleas before she could move from her room into the rest of the house. I knew that trying to put a dose of Revolution would be a challenge, not to mention stressful for the kitty. So, yesterday, with my gloves and my husband, i caught her, and she fought me, bit me, she even peed all over me. Poor thing. I felt terrible. Just terrible. Now, she won't look at me, won't come for her food anymore. I feel like we've gone backwards

.

I guess what i'm asking is; is she too feral to ever be okay inside? Should i let her back out in the Spring? Would she be happier? The way she fought me, i'd never seen that before and i've had cats all my life. Even mean ones. But never feral. I don't want her to go back out, especially with winter coming.

This is her when she liked me better. They think she's about a year old, maybe a little older.
Well, any advice, help would be greatly appreciated. I just don't know

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi!
Gracious sakes, she is fantastic!!
So, she is still in that room (In other words, not back outside?)
Yes, there is definitely hope. Here is what I think.

There are ways to get her to relax, and then, eventually, to see you as a giver of good things, and not evil.

For now, basically leave her alone until you see that she's eating again. Resist the temptation to look in on her all the time. Play some music for her.

When she's eating again and is a tad bit calmer, then start sitting on the floor away from her/across the room from her, read poetry, play more music (an app Relax My Cat, MusicForCats.com, harp music et al), read some more. Sing to her, something lovely and happy. Read more uplifting poetry.

This will take time. The thing is, you have time because she's inside with you now. Do not be in a hurry. Be relaxed and calm, sincerely calm, and happy that she's there with you, praise her, tell her how gorgeous she is.

-->Don't look at her intently or intensely, and don't approach her. Put food and water off to the side, not in front of her. If she's hiding, fine, let her.

When you put treats out, leave them on the floor and don't try to make her come to get them.

Let her come to the conclusion that you're ok, and let her approach you. It'll happen

 

[kimmer3d]

Hi!
Gracious sakes, she is fantastic!!
So, she is still in that room (In other words, not back outside?)
Yes, there is definitely hope. Here is what I think.

There are ways to get her to relax, and then, eventually, to see you as a giver of good things, and not evil.

For now, basically leave her alone until you see that she's eating again. Resist the temptation to look in on her all the time. Play some music for her.

When she's eating again and is a tad bit calmer, then start sitting on the floor away from her/across the room from her, read poetry, play more music (an app Relax My Cat, MusicForCats.com, harp music et al), read some more. Sing to her, something lovely and happy. Read more uplifting poetry.

This will take time. The thing is, you have time because she's inside with you now. Do not be in a hurry. Be relaxed and calm, sincerely calm, and happy that she's there with you, praise her, tell her how gorgeous she is.

-->Don't look at her intently or intensely, and don't approach her. Put food and water off to the side, not in front of her. If she's hiding, fine, let her.

When you put treats out, leave them on the floor and don't try to make her come to get them.

Let her come to the conclusion that you're ok, and let her approach you. It'll happen

Hi! Thank you so much for replying. Yes, she is still in the room. I will not let her out, especially since i know it's getting too cold and she was HUNGRY. I just feel bad that she reacted so badly, and is not happy with me, after the Revolution episode. I will put her food out and her treats, and i'll give her space. Hopefully, she'll come around and see that we just want to love her. I am so happy to have found this forum. I can see that i am not alone.
Best,
Kim

 

[1CatOverTheLine]

I guess what i'm asking is; is she too feral to ever be okay inside?

kimmer3d - Nope; there's no such thing as, "too feral." Cats are smarter and more emotionally developed than Humans, and have the ability to forgive, and to Love without reservation. If you're patient with her, and have it in your Heart to help her and to Love her, no force on earth can stand against you. By Spring, Lily will have forgotten what, "outside," even means.

Welcome to TCS; you really found the right place! Jcatbird Norachan @bigbadbass @white shadow and others will, no doubt, be along soon or late, and can (and will) answer any concern you might have with adopting an "unadoptable" cat. I have eight former ferals inside (out of an eleven cat clowder), and they all understand what Life is really about now.

God Bless you for helping this stunning girl!



Edit: if you decide to stick around, I've no doubt that everyone her involved with ferals would Love to see Lily's story unfold as a journal on this thread:

Fervour For Ferals.
.

 

[tabbytom]

Hello kimmer3d , thank you for taking time to get this beautiful kitty in. Is she still indoors? I believe she still is.

Don't give up hope on her. Let her calm down for the next few days and let her gain her back the trust in you. Continue the routine of feeding her, playing chase cheese balls with her, talking calmly and softly to her, showing her your love, sitting down showing hands with no gloves.

Leave your husband and your clean unwashed garments with her in the room so that she gets familiar with your scents. Place it where she lays and get a box for her so she can make it a safe place to hide as being in a big room with no covers is overwhelming for her. You don't want her to hide under beds or cabinets where it's difficult to get her out if need to. So a box will do just fine. Place her litter box across the room away from her dish and water.

She could have faced similar situation outside before she came to you as in being caught and trapped with several people handling one cat. So you and your husband catching her to give her the flu treatment, it sort of triggered her mind of the TNR scenes she had before.

Once her confidence level is up to begin trusting you, take it easy as it may take a little more time as expected. Try not to spook her again. Since she had made progress by coming into your house and getting fed by you, just give her more time to readjust after the recent incident. The faster she gets to trust you and your husband, the faster she'll be integrated with everyone and the house.

Yes, please keep her indoors which is safer for her and once she knows the she does not have to run from anybody, she'll know that this is a safe place to stay.

Feel free to ask questions if you have any and we'll try our best to help. Do keep us updated of the progress.

 

[kimmer3d]

kimmer3d - Nope; there's no such thing as, "too feral." Cats are smarter and more emotionally developed than Humans, and have the ability to forgive, and to Love without reservation. If you're patient with her, and have it in your Heart to help her and to Love her, no force on earth can stand against you. By Spring, Lily will have forgotten what, "outside," even means.

Welcome to TCS; you really found the right place! Jcatbird Norachan @bigbadbass @white shadow and others will, no doubt, be along soon or late, and can (and will) answer any concern you might have with adopting an "unadoptable" cat. I have eight former ferals inside (out of an eleven cat clowder), and they all understand what Life is really about now.

God Bless you for helping this stunning girl!



Edit: if you decide to stick around, I've no doubt that everyone her involved with ferals would Love to see Lily's story unfold as a journal on this thread:

Fervour For Ferals.
.

Thank you so much! This site is fantastic. Lily will have a never-ending supply of love from me. I'm very patient. I've just never caught a feral before, and have no idea what i'm doing. I want her to feel safe and loved. She can take the time she needs. Thank you for saying that 'there's no such thing as too feral'. It makes me feel much better. There's hope for us!

 

[kimmer3d]

Hello kimmer3d , thank you for taking time to get this beautiful kitty in. Is she still indoors? I believe she still is.

Don't give up hope on her. Let her calm down for the next few days and let her gain her back the trust in you. Continue the routine of feeding her, playing chase cheese balls with her, talking calmly and softly to her, showing her your love, sitting down showing hands with no gloves.

Leave your husband and your clean unwashed garments with her in the room so that she gets familiar with your scents. Place it where she lays and get a box for her so she can make it a safe place to hide as being in a big room with no covers is overwhelming for her. You don't want her to hide under beds or cabinets where it's difficult to get her out if need to. So a box will do just fine. Place her litter box across the room away from her dish and water.

She could have faced similar situation outside before she came to you as in being caught and trapped with several people handling one cat. So you and your husband catching her to give her the flu treatment, it sort of triggered her mind of the TNR scenes she had before.

Once her confidence level is up to begin trusting you, take it easy as it may take a little more time as expected. Try not to spook her again. Since she had made progress by coming into your house and getting fed by you, just give her more time to readjust after the recent incident. The faster she gets to trust you and your husband, the faster she'll be integrated with everyone and the house.

Yes, please keep her indoors which is safer for her and once she knows the she does not have to run from anybody, she'll know that this is a safe place to stay.

Feel free to ask questions if you have any and we'll try our best to help. Do keep us updated of the progress.

Thank you so much! Yes, she is in our warm house It's really cold out, and i can't imagine what she would have done to keep warm. I believe you are correct. The catching her and giving her the flea treatment triggered some trauma, probably when she was caught the first time and spayed. Poor thing. This makes complete sense. I will keep my distance and wait for her to come to me, if she wants. I have all the time in the world.

I will keep you posted. You guys are fantastic!!!

 

[Furballsmom]

 

[1CatOverTheLine]

Thank you so much! This site is fantastic. Lily will have a never-ending supply of love from me. I'm very patient. I've just never caught a feral before, and have no idea what i'm doing. I want her to feel safe and loved. She can take the time she needs. Thank you for saying that 'there's no such thing as too feral'. It makes me feel much better. There's hope for us!

kimmer3d - One of mine - White Tip - lived for years outside in -30º C. Winters, and was simply untouchable after she was trapped and brought inside with her then-weeks old Son, Oz. She was the fiercest and most reluctant cat I ever met, and her only goal in Life was to kill anything and anyone who drew near her. It required three of us - my veterinarian, his Vet Tech, and myself - to get her sufficiently tranquilised so as to have her spayed, and even my Vet - dear Friend that he is, and ever unwilling to give up on anything in Life - advised me when he brought her back to me that she should be allowed back outside once she'd healed properly, as she'd "never be an house cat."

She's the reason that my typing's so dreadful, in fact; she's asleep on the desk between me and the keyboard.

 

[fionasmom]

Just because she was TNRed, does not mean that something has not happened in her past that has made her react. From your description, I would say that you are on your way to a great relationship. To me, she is not that "feral" at heart and can absolutely be worked with. Since she is in a very safe place, hopefully she will not need any handling for a while and you will have time to bond. I rescued a cat like her years ago; she lived in my garage and when I moved I knew I could not abandon her, so trapped her, expecting the worst. It turned out she had been TNRed with no ear tip, or was a pet who was lost or abandoned and when I gave her the room that became hers she simply got on the bed and slept as if her miserable life was over. A few years later I was actually able to successfully treat her for diabetes with insulin injection, just to show how far we got.

 

[kimmer3d]

kimmer3d - One of mine - White Tip - lived for years outside in -30º C. Winters, and was simply untouchable after she was trapped and brought inside with her then-weeks old Son, Oz. She was the fiercest and most reluctant cat I ever met, and her only goal in Life was to kill anything and anyone who drew near her. It required three of us - my veterinarian, his Vet Tech, and myself - to get her sufficiently tranquilised so as to have her spayed, and even my Vet - dear Friend that he is, and ever unwilling to give up on anything in Life - advised me when he brought her back to me that she should be allowed back outside once she'd healed properly, as she'd "never be an house cat."

She's the reason that my typing's so dreadful, in fact; she's asleep on the desk between me and the keyboard.

View attachment 259038​

Wow. Hihihi. What a fantastic story! It gives me hope I absolutely love cats. I just lost my 19-year-old Siamese girl to cancer last month, and i've been so devastated, that i never thought of getting another cat. Hurts too much. But here is Lily, and i'm already very attached. In time, i hope she'll come over and realize that i only want the best for her.

 

[Jcatbird]

Hi! I am glad you came! I am dealing with a similar situation right now. The only difference is that I have done this with many cats and over many years. She is actually okay. It may not seem so but she was scared by being handled and treated. Now she is mad. I bet she turns her back to you at times to give you the “cold shoulder”. She is probably scooting away and playing hard to get. This cat chose you. She ran away from a place she did not like and picked you to adopt. She will come around. I totally believe that and I come to this conclusion from the experiences I have had with many many cats. Every cat is different and she will need time to calm down and understand that everything is still okay. There are lots of ways to work with her to help her to adjust. Continue what you have been doing with her. It was working and she will trust it again. Food is the best bonding tool I know of. If she hesitates to eat then use treats. Warm meat baby food is a good bait. My cats love Carl Buddig ham sandwich meat. I don’t know why that is such a great lure but it works. Canned chicken in water is a good one too. Get her eating and then use the food to bring her closer to you. If she still goes for cheese balls use them and as she chases you can drop them closer to you as she gets too excited to notice. I spend quiet time just talking to them or singing. You don’t have to be great at it. They just like hearing you. Soft music sometimes calms. There are products for sale that calm like Feliway. I also find that if I sleep in the room with them they can investigate me as I sleep. They are curious and it will get them interested in you, in time. Out of the cats I pulled in last year I have socialized 71 and they have all gotten adopted. Some were dumped pets but many were very wild feral cats. I have been told that some would be unable to socialize but so far , they have all done very well. My feral Tom is actually calling me to his room right now. He has only been inside a few days and at one point he looked like he would be interested in eating me. Lol Now he is having bouts of rubbing all over me. One tool I use to begin touching is a brush. I leave it where they can see it and even play with it. When I get a chance to touch them with it I do. They may leave at first but if you can get even one or two strokes down their back they realize it feels great! That often leads to me sneaking my hand in to pet and soon after I can sneak in the flea treatment that I put on the back of their neck. I brush them and scrub the tube down the back of the neck. They assume it is the brush. There are so many tips you can use to get through this with this beautiful cat. You already won her heart and that is the biggest hurdle. You are doing a fantastic job with her. You are just going through an adjustment stage. She will learn as you go and begin to trusut what goes on around her. This is all new to her. Just give it time and take baby steps. You’re really doing great in spite of your concerns. I think you are awesome for saving her life! You just keep writing in here with any questions or worries. This is a great place to get support. Lots of people will want to help you and give you the benefit of their experience and knowledge. I am looking forward to hearing your story with kitty. Give yourself some credit for having accomplished a lot in a very short time! You have kitty love!

 

[kimmer3d]

Just because she was TNRed, does not mean that something has not happened in her past that has made her react. From your description, I would say that you are on your way to a great relationship. To me, she is not that "feral" at heart and can absolutely be worked with. Since she is in a very safe place, hopefully she will not need any handling for a while and you will have time to bond. I rescued a cat like her years ago; she lived in my garage and when I moved I knew I could not abandon her, so trapped her, expecting the worst. It turned out she had been TNRed with no ear tip, or was a pet who was lost or abandoned and when I gave her the room that became hers she simply got on the bed and slept as if her miserable life was over. A few years later I was actually able to successfully treat her for diabetes with insulin injection, just to show how far we got.

Thank you! I've read about 'semi-ferals' too. Maybe Lily had some kind of human contact before? Perhaps she was mistreated? I don't know. The local rescue could only tell me that they caught her near a barn. The farmer had spotted her and called them. But that's all i know. When i caught her, the next day she came out and eat in front of me while i sat and watched her. So maybe you are right!

 

[tabbytom]

and wait for her to come to me, if she wants. I have all the time in the world.

Yes, she will! Just keep the routines and never give up.

Even if she comes up to you, let her do all the smelling and rubbing and smearing of her scents on you and let her own you. You don't do a thing to win her. Don't try to pet her as yet. All this comes later once she completely own you.

After she has owned you, do not raise your hand to pet her. Form you hand into a fist and move c]slowly to her face and let her smell your fist and rub her scent on her. If you have other pets, wash your hands and rub the blanket she is using to transfer her scent on you. Then pet her cheek with the formed fist and move slowly to her head. Do it once or twice and stopped and repeat later. From formed fist to petting her with the back of your and and repeat. Then with the palm on her head down her back. Just do all these in slow sequence and repeat till she knows you are no threat to her.

Just be very patience and remember, it's alway one step forward and two steps back.

 

[kimmer3d]

Hi! I am glad you came! I am dealing with a similar situation right now. The only difference is that I have done this with many cats and over many years. She is actually okay. It may not seem so but she was scared by being handled and treated. Now she is mad. I bet she turns her back to you at times to give you the “cold shoulder”. She is probably scooting away and playing hard to get. This cat chose you. She ran away from a place she did not like and picked you to adopt. She will come around. I totally believe that and I come to this conclusion from the experiences I have had with many many cats. Every cat is different and she will need time to calm down and understand that everything is still okay. There are lots of ways to work with her to help her to adjust. Continue what you have been doing with her. It was working and she will trust it again. Food is the best bonding tool I know of. If she hesitates to eat then use treats. Warm meat baby food is a good bait. My cats love Carl Buddig ham sandwich meat. I don’t know why that is such a great lure but it works. Canned chicken in water is a good one too. Get her eating and then use the food to bring her closer to you. If she still goes for cheese balls use them and as she chases you can drop them closer to you as she gets too excited to notice. I spend quiet time just talking to them or singing. You don’t have to be great at it. They just like hearing you. Soft music sometimes calms. There are products for sale that calm like Feliway. I also find that if I sleep in the room with them they can investigate me as I sleep. They are curious and it will get them interested in you, in time. Out of the cats I pulled in last year I have socialized 71 and they have all gotten adopted. Some were dumped pets but many were very wild feral cats. I have been told that some would be unable to socialize but so far , they have all done very well. My feral Tom is actually calling me to his room right now. He has only been inside a few days and at one point he looked like he would be interested in eating me. Lol Now he is having bouts of rubbing all over me. One tool I use to begin touching is a brush. I leave it where they can see it and even play with it. When I get a chance to touch them with it I do. They may leave at first but if you can get even one or two strokes down their back they realize it feels great! That often leads to me sneaking my hand in to pet and soon after I can sneak in the flea treatment that I put on the back of their neck. I brush them and scrub the tube down the back of the neck. They assume it is the brush. There are so many tips you can use to get through this with this beautiful cat. You already won her heart and that is the biggest hurdle. You are doing a fantastic job with her. You are just going through an adjustment stage. She will learn as you go and begin to trusut what goes on around her. This is all new to her. Just give it time and take baby steps. You’re really doing great in spite of your concerns. I think you are awesome for saving her life! You just keep writing in here with any questions or worries. This is a great place to get support. Lots of people will want to help you and give you the benefit of their experience and knowledge. I am looking forward to hearing your story with kitty. Give yourself some credit for having accomplished a lot in a very short time! You have kitty love!

Hihihi. Thank you so much. Yes, she is giving me the 'cold shoulder'. And i can understand why she is mad. I didn't want to stress her, but at least now, i know she won't be bothered or handled for a long time. Not until she wants. I love the brush tip, that never occurred to me. I am going to use it when Lily is less stressed. I can actually hear her running in her room playing with her ball. I guess she's going to be okay. Tomorrow, baby steps. I've been spending a few hours each day in her room while i work on my laptop and will continue to do so. She was so cute running and chasing her cheese balls... i just want her to be comfortable with me again

 

[kimmer3d]

Yes, she will! Just keep the routines and never give up.

Even if she comes up to you, let her do all the smelling and rubbing and smearing of her scents on you and let her own you. You don't do a thing to win her. Don't try to pet her as yet. All this comes later once she completely own you.

After she has owned you, do not raise your hand to pet her. Form you hand into a fist and move c]slowly to her face and let her smell your fist and rub her scent on her. If you have other pets, wash your hands and rub the blanket she is using to transfer her scent on you. Then pet her cheek with the formed fist and move slowly to her head. Do it once or twice and stopped and repeat later. From formed fist to petting her with the back of your and and repeat. Then with the palm on her head down her back. Just do all these in slow sequence and repeat till she knows you are no threat to her.

Just be very patience and remember, it's alway one step forward and two steps back.

So true. I will definitely wait for her to do the first move, and then some. I can see how nervous she is with my hands when i feed her. I will take it slow. I'm not in a hurry at all. I just want her to feel comfortable and eventually see that she is safe. Safe with me.

 

[Jcatbird]

I am reading your posts and you should know that I read a great many here. I can see something in your writing that tells me you WILL both get through this just fine. There are cat lovers and cat people. You are both. You have the natural instincts and the love. This is a very lucky and smart cat. I am sure she came across many humans in her quest for a home but she came to you. She saw in you what I see. You’re going to give her love. You say you can hear her playing! That is so great. Happy cats play. She is already getting over the stress. There is something very special between you. I bet she made you smile when you heard her playing. It must have been a bit if a relief. You have been getting great tips here. Try them out and just keep going. Progress is happening with each moment. It just takes a little time for it to be clear.

 

[tabbytom]

I can see how nervous she is.....

One more thing, don't forget the slow eye blink with her.

 

[Norachan]

Wow, what a pretty girl!

You've had some really good advice here already, but I just wanted to say don't give up. She's looking at you with very calm, trusting eyes in that picture. She might be a bit upset now because you grabbed her, but she'll get over it.

My feral rescues will sulk and hide from me for up to a week if I ever have to trap them and take them to the vet. They forgive me eventually though.

I have a similar problem to you when I have to give the wilder ones their worming medicine. Will she (usually) let you stand close by when she eats? I've found the easiest way to get the liquid wormer on the back of their neck is to offer them a delicious treat, wait until their head goes down and the fur at the back of their neck parts a little and then squeeze the liquid on from a standing position. You have to be fast and I'm sure it's not as effective as slowly squeezing it onto their skin, but it's better than nothing.

My cats have an outdoor enclosure, so they need worming regularly. If she's going to be an indoor only cat you won't need to worry about fleas and worms that much, but just in case you ever need to treat her again.

 

[kimmer3d]

I am reading your posts and you should know that I read a great many here. I can see something in your writing that tells me you WILL both get through this just fine. There are cat lovers and cat people. You are both. You have the natural instincts and the love. This is a very lucky and smart cat. I am sure she came across many humans in her quest for a home but she came to you. She saw in you what I see. You’re going to give her love. You say you can hear her playing! That is so great. Happy cats play. She is already getting over the stress. There is something very special between you. I bet she made you smile when you heard her playing. It must have been a bit if a relief. You have been getting great tips here. Try them out and just keep going. Progress is happening with each moment. It just takes a little time for it to be clear.

Yes. I laughed when i heard her playing, and it made me feel great, and that there's hope. I'm going to spend some time with her later, and see if she wants to chase her cheese balls again!