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- #101
THANK YOU!!!"I think it is definitely possible Hawthorne senses the energy of the house - lots of activity, things changing locations, furniture disappearing, etc." - Agreed. Cats are creatures of habit, don't like change. So any changes in territory, emotions, etc can put them on edge.
"So far in terms of the moving, we spent one hour at my mom's on Monday evening (and today is Saturday)." - OK. It probably is te other stuff (emotions, getting ready for the listing, etc) that is causing some unease. They are very perceptive.
" But in about a week, we go there for five days. So I know more things will be unsettled, plus in the next week we're painting and so on to get the house ready to sell, and someone will be coming to replace some floors - so lots going on." - Yes, given that I suspect Hawthorne will be struggling a bit. So just try to make him as happy as possible, try to keep to play and feeding routines. And keep any interactions between them short (or even if you sense anxiety hold off). And when things settle down we can get back to it. Just try to make Hawthorne's life as "normal" as possible and spend some extra time and attention on him if possible.
"You're absolutely right, I should have held off letting them be at the gate given his mood. I had grown so confident that he would be tentative that I thought it would be ok, and then suddenly he was not so tentative. " - That is fine we only know after. It is not a big deal so no need to worry.
"He's had a lot to contend with in the last six months - my other cat passing away, then a new cat showing up, and now 'moving type' activities. So, I'm trying to be patient. " - Yes, but he is going to be fine and Florence is going to be a positive for him (as wil the new house). He has been through a lot BUT cats are resilient. He is going to be just fine.
"And lastly, you'd asked about how long for recovery - what do I look for in that regard?" - A return to "normal" defined by body language, not avoiding certain areas, eating normal, etc.
"I would say within five minutes both were able to lie down and settle," - OK, great. That is really good.
" BUT, it's now 10 hours later and she is still growling at him much more and from a much greater distance." - Yes, that will happen but as she sees him behaving it will give her confidence all is well.
"And they briefly encountered each other a little while ago at the gate (she slipped out while I was going into the room)" - SO they had no barrier between them?
" and she kind of froze and tried to retreat very very slowly." - That is fine, she was telling him she doesn't mean any harm or threat. It is actually great.
Did he attack her at all? How was his body language?
"In the past, she had a lot more confidence about it." - Yes BUT she did the exact right thing to tell him she doesn't mean harm or to be a threat. I am not at all bothered by that.
"I think his pissy behaviour this morning surprised her too." - I am sure it did. BUT it sounds like it was really nothing more than a blip. I don't get a sense it is anything really.
This was a test and they actually did pretty well. I don't think is an issue at all. We are going to be just fine.
And sorry if it was unclear - they did NOT meet with no barrier. They met at gate #2 (she slipped beyond gate #1). She basically froze as soon as she saw him and slowly backed away.
I think your advice is very very wise - for now, just make them both individually as happy and comfortable as possible, and return to the intro after some of this settles a bit.
I think that is a plan that works for all of us, because doing all the house stuff AND the cat stuff is too much. Better for me too to just spend time with each and know we can work on the intro again later.