The "What's on your mind?" Thread -2017

[tallyollyopia]

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Duly noted--and I shall.

My manager was able to pull someone from the main team (much to the of the supervisor for that team) to help for the next few months while I'm on work restrictions. We do have a new supervisor starting tomorrow and a new employee starting in 2 weeks but they'll be useless for at least a month while they go through all the trainings, both company required ones and department required ones, and settle into their new roles. Today was the first day I had help. Normally it takes all day to cover both facilities by one person and a lot just doesn't get done at all. Today we got done just before noon After lunch, we had to clear out space and get supplies ready so that tomorrow I can fill those spaces up with more of the lab's projects My back isn't as painful as it normally is on Sundays.

I'll be heading out soon. I still have no energy to deal with my family It's good to know that taking a break from the drama is perfectly ok. Any suggestions on how I can deal with the guilt-tripping that will eventually happen?

I suggest you vent here.

Another idea is to deflect, not engage. They start the sob story, reply with something like "By the way, did you hear blah news story?" Don't respond to it, a response will feed into it, change the subject. Now if they push, if they get aggressive and nasty, then state once "I will not stay and be treated this way." and then deflect. If they continue, make good on your statement and leave.

If you do this consistently, yeah it'll get worse at first as they try to pull you back into your old role, but then it'll get better.

I was worried that they wouldn't. I just don't have a positive experience with HR. I was actually on work restrictions 2 years ago when I returned from surgery but it wasn't exactly official. My then-supervisor said I didn't need to let HR or the health service office know. Maybe the policy has changed since then, I don't know.

Simply walking can be enough to send pain shooting up my lower back I have to go to physical therapy to work out the issues with my back and hips. It's written in HR's accomodation approval letter that I am allowed to take time off from work to go to PT.

Mom wanted me to go over for dinner tonight. I declined. She made up excuses for my Dad's behavior last time which is just BS She always has an excuse for everything. My patience dealing with the constant drama and other issues has run out. I have no doubt that a good part of my lifelong anxiety issues is a result of growing up in an unhealthy, negative, drama filled environment.

I'm going to give you some unsolicited advice. If you have medical problems, get it all in writing and make it all official. That way you have ADA protection. If you have ADA protection then you have a whole lot of protections. They can't make you do something you can't do, and they can't punish you either. And if there's even a hint of retaliation ("Oh gee, you clocked in 30 seconds too late, we're writing you up. We don't care someone else was 2 minutes too late.") then the EEOC is going to be your friend. Also, you don't have to take FMLA as a block, you can take off as needed once you are on FMLA and they can't punish/retaliate for that either.

And don't do what I did last year. If I had been smart and selfish I'd have gone on FMLA and told the company to kiss my . Instead I knew they were short-staffed so I did my best to stay on until my moving day. I ended up with a lot more physical pain and suffering, I got in trouble for going to the ER because they were short-staffed, I got in trouble for a money mistake when I was high as a kite on the feel-good drugs because I wasn't allowed to stay home after going to the ER, I got in trouble for not filing my folders when my doctor flat out said no use of the right hand and arm including no filing, I got in trouble when I said that a co-worker I was training couldn't simply unplug my mouse and plug hers in to switch from left-handed to right-handed configuration, and in the end I left the company on really bad terms because I couldn't deal with all the stress on top of the physical pain and ended up having a nervous breakdown. (I had gotten in trouble for not filing despite the doctor's restriction. I was closing the office that night with someone else, someone sympathetic, and I told him that I didn't know if I was going to show up in the morning and gave him my keys, and then I covered my desk in sticky notes as to what was what in case I didn't come back. An hour later during the drive home I first called my husband and discussed it with him and then I left a message with HR that I was not ever coming back and who had my keys.) I actually was on FMLA at the end, but I tried to take off as needed because they were short-staffed instead of putting myself first and them a far, far last.

I never thought I'd say this, but I'm going to tell you the first thing they told me in training for my current job: YOU first, TEAM second. (Unspoken is: LIFE--DOES NOT EXIST.) The reasoning behind this is: if you can't function properly, you're letting the team down.

Five years ago (practically to the day) I slipped and fell and broke my left forearm in three places. It had to be repaired surgically and is now held together with little titanium screws and plates, and it was in a cast for months (which I mean literally -- it's not hyperbole). While it was in the cast, the ligaments got shorter, so that when it came out of the cast it was clenched in a fist and I was in danger of bed sores from my fingernails growing into my palms. Occupational therapy got it to finally unclench; more O.T. got it to the point where the wrist is strong enough that I can now use it to support myself by leaning on a banister. The fingers are straight enough now that I can once again get my wedding ring over the knuckle. They aren't straight enough for me to clap my hands normally; I have to do it sideways, right hand against just the palm of my left hand. And the little finger isn't strong enough to control thread tension so that I can crochet or tat (both of which I've done from childhood).

At this point I have no health insurance, which means no more O.T., but I do have a clue about what I need to do. Right now the best exercise for that hand is practicing my guitar, and I've finally gotten the physical environment set up properly for guitar practice. I found a beautiful triptych style mirror, with beveled edges that grab the light and throw off rainbows, for $35 at Goodwill, and I now have it mounted securely on the wall across from the chair I sit in to practice, because it's much better to look in the mirror than to crane down to get a good look at the hand. I've made a new elastic guitar strap that holds it in the best position for playing, even when I'm seated. I still have the nice guitarist's foot rest that I bought in the late '80s, and the guitar stand, and most importantly I still have my guitar with the beautiful tone. And I found the music for the lovely étude my guitar teacher wrote for me, to show off with. I worked on it the other day, expecting a total disaster, and was astonished to discover that I can still make all but one of the chords (even the one that requires a half bar), and the one that I can't quite make will work okay if I just ignore the alternate bass note. And I'm now all the way up to 5 minutes of practice before my wrist hurts too much to continue! (I know, that sounds like a really short practice session, but numerous short practice sessions are actually more effective than the same total amount of time spent in just one or two longer sessions. And besides, while I'm getting my callouses back the sessions were bound to be short anyhow.)

There's just one thing that I don't understand about how my hand is working, and this is as good a place as any to ask, I think, since I no longer have an occupational therapist. Finger independence is always a bit of a problem for musicians because the nerves that control the little finger and the ring finger branch off from a single nerve. Guitar students are told horror stories about Robert Schumann, who destroyed his hands and his career as a pianist by using some novel exercises to try to develop true independence of those two fingers. (The stories are apparently not true, but the cautionary tales persist: 1 • Schumann’s Hand « Pianist to Pianist, by Jura Margulis.) However, since my injury this lack of finger independence also involves the middle finger of my left hand. Do any of you folks with more medical knowledge than I have know why this would be?

Margret

I don't know why, but knowing what I know (and I only have technical school anatomy and physiology to go on, so I could be wrong), but I don't think you're going to get that independence back.

My guess would be that it's a ligament/tendon/muscle problem and not a nerve problem. Humans tend to use the thumb and first finger a lot more than they use the middle, ring and little finger, and that usage would cause more practice in re-attaining full control. And muscle memory is a very real thing, something that would have been greatly diminished or completely forgotten over months of non-use. You're likely still at a point where the hand must move as one while the brain is figuring out all the individual sensations that will lead to full individual control.

More research!

I have heard of people soaking their cats, and yeah, that's not cool. Shadow and Montressor simply don't engage in behaviors that I feel are dangerous or damaging. I find that most cats don't have damaging/destructive behaviors. Midway had three, we're down to one. The first one was him jumping on the stove. He has absolutely no way of knowing if the stove is cold or if it's just recently turned off and still hot, so that needed fixing. Cheap plastic table mats with double-sided sticky tape on the top side that I left on the stove cured him of that. The blinds, we're just about done with that. The last one is his penchant for knocking stuff off high places in the wee hours of the morning. More annoyance than anything usually, but we can't get rid of every glass item in the house and shattered glass is both damage and destructive. (I threw out the very nice glass drinking glasses since my husband couldn't seem to remember to NOT put one on the bathroom counter before bed.) I'm also afraid of him deciding to knock things like smartphones off or him tipping a glass on the electronics instead of on the floor or him knocking random stuff over when he bolts after I throw the covers off (which tricks him into thinking I'm getting out of bed). Since he does bolt when he thinks I'm getting up, I also worry when he does find something to shatter he's going to get glass splinters in his paws while running when I get up to deal with cleaning up the glass.

I found smell to work as a good deterrent. Whatever area (and in our house that was just the kitchen and the counters) that I didn't want the cats getting on or into, I cleaned with ammonia (which all of them hate the smell of--Rose actually enjoyed the smell of citrus, for some strange reason) and had no further problems.

arouetta , we're cross-posting. So, okay, one thing at a time.

Yes, feline physics experiments can be very worrisome. I've never found a way to break a cat of pushing things off. We used to tell Floppy "No physics experiments." She knew what we were talking about and she'd stop, until we weren't looking. If the glass (or whatever) was still there, she'd push it off. I have a lovely crocheted lace runner that my mother made to go on top of my treadle sewing machine (when closed), and I can't use it for fear of a cat pulling it off, along with anything on top of it, and snagging it in the bargain.

I think you missed my point about abuse. I wasn't talking about soaking a cat, I was talking about routinely using any training method that involves punishment (which is what a spritz of water is) when you already know that it won't work.

And I can think of one scenario where soaking, specifically with a hose or a bucket of water, is appropriate and not abusive -- if you need to break up a cat or cat/dog fight that is reaching dangerous levels. But the intention there isn't punishment, it's startling the participants out of fight mode, without getting hurt yourself.

Margret

Duly noted.

Roger's sister has a sleep schedule similar to mine -- she tends to stay up late at night and get up late in the morning. Grandma Neva used to call her at around 5:00 a.m. to ask "What are you doing?" "Sleeping, Grandma." "Well why aren't you scrubbing the stairs?" (or whatever the current bee in her bonnet was).

After several months of this my S.I.L. finally got fed up and called Grandma Neva just before going to bed. "Hi, Grandma. What are you doing?" "Sleeping! Do you know what time it is?!" "Certainly, Grandma. It's my bedtime, but I thought I should call you first so that we can talk now about whatever it is you planned to call me about in three hours."

For some reason, Grandma Neva stopped calling her early in the morning.

Margret

 

[tallyollyopia]

I got home today and found a dead rabbit (full grown) on the back porch. Part of me is horrified (I don't know how many know this, but rabbits have sharp claws), and the rest of me is impressed. One of my cats killed a full grown rabbit! (I know that sounds horrible of me--but the local rabbit population is only slightly below "plague" levels here.)

 

[arouetta]

I am not a dog person in the slightest, but I do like that Bravecto commercial.

 

[LTS3]

Having dealt with a guilt-tripping parent (thank goodness, just one), the deflecting is probably the best answer you are going to get. And you do need to be prepared to get up and walk away if they persist after warning. That works well on the telephone, too. "Mom, if we can't have a pleasant conversation, I have to hang up." "Mom, I did tell you. I'll speak with you later." click.

I did that once, hung up on my dad. I had called to speak to Mom and Dad answered the phone. Instead of a "Hi, how are you?" type greeting, it was "What the do you want, you good for nothing ". I immediately hung up. Mom called back and made excuses for what Dad said. She said he was being funny and all this nonsense. I did not find anything funny about it. It was extremely hurtful.

 

[foxxycat]

I would have severed ties if my dad talked to me like that. Seriously!!

I say go to their house=get your stuff you want to keep and just fade away...find another family. you don't need that !

 

[segelkatt]

I always wondered what a vole was. I knew moles, they live underground, are practically blind, very slow and have these huge front feet that look almost like hands with which they did their tunnels. I don't think they would be much in the way of prey for a cat because they don't come above ground much. Now voles apparently look like mice and their bright eyes in the picture show that they run around above ground. So what I see around here are probably mice and voles besides the squirrels. By the way, Panthera has now brought 5 birds inside and I have closed the window panels down to 6 inch slits, hopefully the dumb birds won't fly in through there. Strange that the hummingbirds hardly ever came in, it's those bigger yard bird types that did.

From tallyollyopia (dunno how I lost the quote)
Moles--you can't forget moles. Or, maybe we just had an infestation (for a while that's what the cats were bringing in). Hard to say. (Is a vole like a mole? What's the difference?)


A mole is far more like a mouse, actually. It would, in most cases, take an expert to tell the difference.

vole

mole

Thanks for the new "Egg" posting!

foxxycat So glad you are back! And even a partial win is better than a total loss. As long as you are all trying, options remain open.

The bookcase is sitting in the corner snickering at me. I cannot deal with it today. Still a bit achy from crawling around on the floor putting it together wrong!

 

[segelkatt]

tallyollyopia : the rope you are talking about is called "sisal" and is made from the Mexican agave plant

AWM has a theory that cancer is actually triggered by an undiscovered virus. Taking that into consideration, it makes sense that it's the act of puncturing the skin that makes it more likely for cancer to develop, since that means the integrity of the skin itself is being compromised.



I've been clicking on the smiley icon, and like I said: about half the time I'll get the bar of smileys at the bottom of the message (stays up, like you said) and about half the time they don't come up.



One of the things that happens around here is, in spring when it starts getting that time of year, is we get "moveable clinics" run by vet techs (instead of full blown veterinarians), that charge five, six bucks a shot (not only does my schedule not allow it, but I like getting the cats their shots at the same place every time).

Side note--I had to get shoes today, and AWM and I (since I'm working nights I don't function well in the daytime) went all around town running her errands as well, and we discovered that our town has a PetCo (which probably won't be in business for too long, because it's difficult to find). Out of curiosity, I went in (I'm boycotting Petsmart, not PetCo, after all), and was slightly impressed. Like Petsmart, they had red-eared sliders on sale, unlike Petsmart they had them in a proper environment (mostly aquatic, with landing area under warming light, for those who don't know), which impressed me. Actually, most of the store was like that. I was even (tentatively) impressed by their parakeet cages (which were wide rather than tall, which makes sense given how parakeets like to fly), had the truly, most humongous koi I have ever seen in a tank (it was the size of my forearm), and then I got to the cat section. Most if it was repeats of stuff from other stores, but I got to the scratching posts--and my eyes nearly bugged out of my head. These are sturdy, wood-cored, carpet and swisel (I have no idea how to spell that) rope posts for less money than Wal-Mart charges for their cardboard-cored posts that never screw on as tight as they should be! (We got one and marked another couple as potential buys later, next time I get paid.) The one we got has a carpeted basket on top of the scratching post itself, a toy hanging from the basket that looks kind of like a da bird (and is detatchable and replaceable), and the cats love it. So--cautiously optimistic there.

On another note, one of our stops was a thrift store (to check for more carriers, because I'm not comfortable having fewer carriers than I do cats), and there were two almost perfect carriers except for two things--one, the carriers were dirty with insects on them (but were plastic, and would have been easy to clean), and the price went up. To give perspective, the last time I got a carrier at this place it was ten dollars (and the carrier was clean) and this time it was twenty (and very dirty). Is it petty that I didn't get them? Should I get them tomorrow?

, it is pronounced "SA-ee-sal".

 

[segelkatt]

Nobody should be without health insurance. That is what the Affordable Care Act, also known as "ObamaCare" is for. Why are you not on that?

Five years ago (practically to the day) I slipped and fell and broke my left forearm in three places. It had to be repaired surgically and is now held together with little titanium screws and plates, and it was in a cast for months (which I mean literally -- it's not hyperbole). While it was in the cast, the ligaments got shorter, so that when it came out of the cast it was clenched in a fist and I was in danger of bed sores from my fingernails growing into my palms. Occupational therapy got it to finally unclench; more O.T. got it to the point where the wrist is strong enough that I can now use it to support myself by leaning on a banister. The fingers are straight enough now that I can once again get my wedding ring over the knuckle. They aren't straight enough for me to clap my hands normally; I have to do it sideways, right hand against just the palm of my left hand. And the little finger isn't strong enough to control thread tension so that I can crochet or tat (both of which I've done from childhood).

At this point I have no health insurance, which means no more O.T., but I do have a clue about what I need to do. Right now the best exercise for that hand is practicing my guitar, and I've finally gotten the physical environment set up properly for guitar practice. I found a beautiful triptych style mirror, with beveled edges that grab the light and throw off rainbows, for $35 at Goodwill, and I now have it mounted securely on the wall across from the chair I sit in to practice, because it's much better to look in the mirror than to crane down to get a good look at the hand. I've made a new elastic guitar strap that holds it in the best position for playing, even when I'm seated. I still have the nice guitarist's foot rest that I bought in the late '80s, and the guitar stand, and most importantly I still have my guitar with the beautiful tone. And I found the music for the lovely étude my guitar teacher wrote for me, to show off with. I worked on it the other day, expecting a total disaster, and was astonished to discover that I can still make all but one of the chords (even the one that requires a half bar), and the one that I can't quite make will work okay if I just ignore the alternate bass note. And I'm now all the way up to 5 minutes of practice before my wrist hurts too much to continue! (I know, that sounds like a really short practice session, but numerous short practice sessions are actually more effective than the same total amount of time spent in just one or two longer sessions. And besides, while I'm getting my callouses back the sessions were bound to be short anyhow.)

There's just one thing that I don't understand about how my hand is working, and this is as good a place as any to ask, I think, since I no longer have an occupational therapist. Finger independence is always a bit of a problem for musicians because the nerves that control the little finger and the ring finger branch off from a single nerve. Guitar students are told horror stories about Robert Schumann, who destroyed his hands and his career as a pianist by using some novel exercises to try to develop true independence of those two fingers. (The stories are apparently not true, but the cautionary tales persist: 1 • Schumann’s Hand « Pianist to Pianist, by Jura Margulis.) However, since my injury this lack of finger independence also involves the middle finger of my left hand. Do any of you folks with more medical knowledge than I have know why this would be?

Margret

 

[arouetta]

I knew moles, they live underground, are practically blind, very slow and have these huge front feet that look almost like hands with which they did their tunnels. I don't think they would be much in the way of prey for a cat because they don't come above ground much.

I don't know if anything ever came of it, but I heard scientists were researching moles because they are rodents that live 30+ years in the wild. Scientists wanted to know how they managed to have that kind of a lifespan compared to other rodents so the findings could be applied to human longevity.

 

[segelkatt]

I don't know if anything ever came of it, but I heard scientists were researching moles because they are rodents that live 30+ years in the wild. Scientists wanted to know how they managed to have that kind of a lifespan compared to other rodents so the findings could be applied to human longevity.

I don't know where you got your information from. Per Wikipedia and other sources a mole will live not more than 6 years which seems more reasonable. Even that is more than the lifespan of most small rodents.

 

[LotsOfFur]

My step sister died on Sunday. She was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer 3.5 years ago. She had just turned 50 in April.
We've been sisters since Jan. 1, 1983. We haven't lived in the same city for 18 years and the last time I saw her was 11 years ago when I helped my mom & step dad move to my city.
My step dad is 81 and has been in a rehab/nursing home since December after a fall at home. My poor mom is turning 70 on Friday and things aren't hopeful for my step dad ever coming home.
No one wants to outlive their children... I'm sad for so many different reasons right now. Just needed to say this to someone.

 

[foxxycat]

I am so very sorry for the bad news Lotsoffur. Sending you gentle hugs.

someone asked why they didn't' have insurance-for some folks-the price for the premiums is way too expensive- $900 a month is lower value. When working with the company that helps pay this-it's not bad. But being unemployed and or on social security then that price is way too much to pay without income.

 

[segelkatt]

I am so very sorry for the bad news Lotsoffur. Sending you gentle hugs.

someone asked why they didn't' have insurance-for some folks-the price for the premiums is way too expensive- $900 a month is lower value. When working with the company that helps pay this-it's not bad. But being unemployed and or on social security then that price is way too much to pay without income.

That is why Obama started the Affordable Care Act (ACA) also known as ObamaCare which Trump is trying so hard to get rid of although so far without success. Let us hope that whatever the Senate decides is either just an improvement of the ACA or something altogether better. Those on Social Security have Medicare. Those who are really poor can be on Medicaid.

 

[Margret]

I never thought I'd say this, but I'm going to tell you the first thing they told me in training for my current job: YOU first, TEAM second. (Unspoken is: LIFE--DOES NOT EXIST.) The reasoning behind this is: if you can't function properly, you're letting the team down.

I don't know why, but knowing what I know (and I only have technical school anatomy and physiology to go on, so I could be wrong), but I don't think you're going to get that independence back.

Well, I know for certain that I won't get it back if I don't try.

Late in 2001, my mother and I drove to Ohio to attend the ordination of a friend of mine. We made a long trip of it, detoured into Canada, stopped in Nebraska to see Car Henge, went to a filk con in Ohio, spent a couple of months doing it all. Shortly before we left town a friend of mine suffered a major left hemisphere stroke, and the last word I had on his condition before we left town was that the doctor had told his wife that he might never have meaningful speach again. I mentioned this to my mother and she told me that it was much too soon for that kind of prognosis, that after a stroke healing continued for at least a year and I needed to reassure the man's wife, so as soon as we got home I told her that. She said to me, "Oh, yes. I knew all along that it was just CYA on the doctor's part. Steve already had meaningful speach back. Of course, mostly he was swearing, but it was definitely meaningful!" Steve is still with us. His voice is quiet, and slurred, but he definitely has meaningful speach. He can't play an instrument any longer but he's still a brilliant musician; he composes and he's the core of the Bass section in our choir. And he can walk short distances with a cane.

Before I had the tumor removed, my prognosis for after the surgery was that it would be at least a week before I could read again, if ever. I was reading the day after surgery (and bless my husband and brother for bringing me all those Discworld books in the hospital ).

I find that the most useful attitude is to ignore negative prognoses. Even specialists don't know everything, and we're all different. Read the first few posts in Artie's thread and ask yourself whether you would have thought Artie would still be with us 6 months later. He wouldn't, if artiemom had given up on him, or if LTS3 hadn't found him a great doctor, or if this site didn't exist to supply support, encouragement, and suggestions.

I found smell to work as a good deterrent. Whatever area (and in our house that was just the kitchen and the counters) that I didn't want the cats getting on or into, I cleaned with ammonia (which all of them hate the smell of--Rose actually enjoyed the smell of citrus, for some strange reason) and had no further problems.

Oh, good idea! Of course, it won't work on everything, but then, what does? I am definitely going to get some ammonia to use on kitchen counters; I'm so tired of the cat shedding directly into the food as I'm making it. Just because she doesn't mind swallowing (and spitting up) fur is no reason for me to do the same.

I got home today and found a dead rabbit (full grown) on the back porch. Part of me is horrified (I don't know how many know this, but rabbits have sharp claws), and the rest of me is impressed. One of my cats killed a full grown rabbit! (I know that sounds horrible of me--but the local rabbit population is only slightly below "plague" levels here.)

Here, too, ever since the local coyote pack that probably killed my Floppy died out. (I heard a rumor about distemper, but I don't know for sure.) However, you're right about those claws. Every time I take Jasmine for a walk she tries to chase rabbits and I have to restrain her. She does not accept the explanation that that cute little prey animal could kill her, after all, don't I know that she's a mighty hunter? (I don't believe she's ever had a chance to kill anything larger than a small spider, except in her dreams. The core of a roll of paper towels doesn't count, except in her imagination.)

Nobody should be without health insurance. That is what the Affordable Care Act, also known as "ObamaCare" is for. Why are you not on that?

The insurance company I was with last year dropped a huge number of doctors, including mine, and there are reliable predictions that they'll be doing the same this year. The other options are Kaiser, which doesn't cover one of the meds I need, and therefore Kaiser doctors won't prescribe it, and a company that's affiliated only with certain religious groups, and I don't trust any religion (especially these two) to make health care decisions for me.

I do have catastrophic hospitalization, for a few pennies a month after the federal subsidy. It's from the same company I was with last year, so I don't actually trust it, but I'm willing to gamble a couple of dollars on it, and I don't expect to actually need it (famous last words). The biggest danger is probably from the DES I was exposed to in utero. (Diethylstilbestrol - Wikipedia) No one really knows what will happen to aging DES daughters; since the cancer that comes from DES was previously found only in very elderly women it seems likely that we're more at risk as we age. And given the location of that cancer I'm even more distrustful of religious groups making the decisions.

No one has ever said that the ACA is perfect. During the extensive negotiations required to pass it, certain major protections that the Democrats wanted had to be dropped. I got caught in some of the 'Gotchas' that were added.

My step sister died on Sunday. She was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer 3.5 years ago. She had just turned 50 in April.
We've been sisters since Jan. 1, 1983. We haven't lived in the same city for 18 years and the last time I saw her was 11 years ago when I helped my mom & step dad move to my city.
My step dad is 81 and has been in a rehab/nursing home since December after a fall at home. My poor mom is turning 70 on Friday and things aren't hopeful for my step dad ever coming home.
No one wants to outlive their children... I'm sad for so many different reasons right now. Just needed to say this to someone.

You can talk about it with us as much as you want.

Margret

 

[artiemom]

LotsOfFur I am so sorry to hear of your loss.. ((hugs)).. we are all here for you... so sorry..

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Roger's sister has a sleep schedule similar to mine -- she tends to stay up late at night and get up late in the morning. Grandma Neva used to call her at around 5:00 a.m. to ask "What are you doing?" "Sleeping, Grandma." "Well why aren't you scrubbing the stairs?" (or whatever the current bee in her bonnet was).

After several months of this my S.I.L. finally got fed up and called Grandma Neva just before going to bed. "Hi, Grandma. What are you doing?" "Sleeping! Do you know what time it is?!" "Certainly, Grandma. It's my bedtime, but I thought I should call you first so that we can talk now about whatever it is you planned to call me about in three hours."

For some reason, Grandma Neva stopped calling her early in the morning.

Margret

HA! We keep the same kind of sleeping schedule! I had to get very firm with Suzanne about not calling me before 11am at the earliest.

I got home today and found a dead rabbit (full grown) on the back porch. Part of me is horrified (I don't know how many know this, but rabbits have sharp claws), and the rest of me is impressed. One of my cats killed a full grown rabbit! (I know that sounds horrible of me--but the local rabbit population is only slightly below "plague" levels here.)

Doesn't sound horrible. That's what cats do. It never serves one well to deny the basic nature of a predator, and cats are apex predators in their weight class.

I did that once, hung up on my dad. I had called to speak to Mom and Dad answered the phone. Instead of a "Hi, how are you?" type greeting, it was "What the do you want, you good for nothing ". I immediately hung up. Mom called back and made excuses for what Dad said. She said he was being funny and all this nonsense. I did not find anything funny about it. It was extremely hurtful.

Yes, it was, and inexcusable. I might have hung up and changed my phone number.

I don't know where you got your information from. Per Wikipedia and other sources a mole will live not more than 6 years which seems more reasonable. Even that is more than the lifespan of most small rodents.

She is thinking of the naked mole rat, which does, indeed, live to be 30 years old. It is an easy mistake to make, confusing "naked mole rat" with "mole."

My step sister died on Sunday. She was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer 3.5 years ago. She had just turned 50 in April.
We've been sisters since Jan. 1, 1983. We haven't lived in the same city for 18 years and the last time I saw her was 11 years ago when I helped my mom & step dad move to my city.
My step dad is 81 and has been in a rehab/nursing home since December after a fall at home. My poor mom is turning 70 on Friday and things aren't hopeful for my step dad ever coming home.
No one wants to outlive their children... I'm sad for so many different reasons right now. Just needed to say this to someone.

My heart goes out to you and your family.

 

[segelkatt]

Mamanyt1953 thank you for the clarification on the rat that is not a mole, the only thing in common those two have is that they both live underground, only one is a rodent and it's not the mole which eats worms. Apart from the fact that a mole can ruin a lawn and push veggies out of the ground in the garden but not eat them I find it to be a nice animal with its pretty black fur and oversized hands, even the nose isn't too bad in contrast to some other animals.

 

[Marasoul]

Now I'm

I had a cat health question so I went to the main forum page instead of the Cat Lounge. At the bottom of the page was an article about indoor cats and the rabies vaccine, and I read it.

I've had three different vets say that the adjuvant is the problem, not the vaccine itself. Three different vets. And according to that article, they all lied to me because it's not the problem. That it's the act of getting an injection that's triggering the cancer, not just vaccines, definitely not the adjuvant.

And apparently the hip is not the ideal vaccination site, which all three vets wanted to put it there. Apparently the tail is best, the lower leg second best, because the cancer is easier to treat in both locations. It's also a lot easier to lop off part of the tail or the lower leg if the cancer becomes aggressive, instead of trying to figure out how to take out a chunk of the hip.

Why the (bleep) are vets lying and saying it's the adjuvant when it's not? Why are they pushing the one year vaccine by saying the three year vaccine has the wrong adjuvant, when it's the act of sticking a needle in, so once a year is more risky than once every three years?

Why are they lying???

Been there. It's the money. Just sayin

 

[LTS3]

I have never liked my Dad at all

I broke one of the cats' bowls again I was drying it and it somehow slipped out of the towel and smashed onto the counter And it was the one I had bought to replace one I had dropped and broken a couple months ago too Maybe I should buy stainless steel bowls now.

 

[tallyollyopia]

I did that once, hung up on my dad. I had called to speak to Mom and Dad answered the phone. Instead of a "Hi, how are you?" type greeting, it was "What the do you want, you good for nothing ". I immediately hung up. Mom called back and made excuses for what Dad said. She said he was being funny and all this nonsense. I did not find anything funny about it. It was extremely hurtful.

I would have severed ties if my dad talked to me like that. Seriously!!

I say go to their house=get your stuff you want to keep and just fade away...find another family. you don't need that !

It's not always that easy to separate yourself from family.

tallyollyopia : the rope you are talking about is called "sisal" and is made from the Mexican agave plant

, it is pronounced "SA-ee-sal".

You know, I've never heard the proper pronunciation before--the way I spelled it is how most people around here pronounce it.

Nobody should be without health insurance. That is what the Affordable Care Act, also known as "ObamaCare" is for. Why are you not on that?

When I was unemployed I tried to sign up for ObamaCare--and when I was taking in no money they wanted me to pay six hundred dollars a month.

My step sister died on Sunday. She was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer 3.5 years ago. She had just turned 50 in April.
We've been sisters since Jan. 1, 1983. We haven't lived in the same city for 18 years and the last time I saw her was 11 years ago when I helped my mom & step dad move to my city.
My step dad is 81 and has been in a rehab/nursing home since December after a fall at home. My poor mom is turning 70 on Friday and things aren't hopeful for my step dad ever coming home.
No one wants to outlive their children... I'm sad for so many different reasons right now. Just needed to say this to someone.

That is why Obama started the Affordable Care Act (ACA) also known as ObamaCare which Trump is trying so hard to get rid of although so far without success. Let us hope that whatever the Senate decides is either just an improvement of the ACA or something altogether better. Those on Social Security have Medicare. Those who are really poor can be on Medicaid.

Speaking as someone who tried to get Medicaid--it's nearly impossible. I don't know what other states require, but in this one you have to have your medical records from every doctor you have ever seen, and for me that's impossible--when DD was stationed in Germany and while I was there I saw a local doctor.

Well, I know for certain that I won't get it back if I don't try.

Late in 2001, my mother and I drove to Ohio to attend the ordination of a friend of mine. We made a long trip of it, detoured into Canada, stopped in Nebraska to see Car Henge, went to a filk con in Ohio, spent a couple of months doing it all. Shortly before we left town a friend of mine suffered a major left hemisphere stroke, and the last word I had on his condition before we left town was that the doctor had told his wife that he might never have meaningful speach again. I mentioned this to my mother and she told me that it was much too soon for that kind of prognosis, that after a stroke healing continued for at least a year and I needed to reassure the man's wife, so as soon as we got home I told her that. She said to me, "Oh, yes. I knew all along that it was just CYA on the doctor's part. Steve already had meaningful speach back. Of course, mostly he was swearing, but it was definitely meaningful!" Steve is still with us. His voice is quiet, and slurred, but he definitely has meaningful speach. He can't play an instrument any longer but he's still a brilliant musician; he composes and he's the core of the Bass section in our choir. And he can walk short distances with a cane.

Before I had the tumor removed, my prognosis for after the surgery was that it would be at least a week before I could read again, if ever. I was reading the day after surgery (and bless my husband and brother for bringing me all those Discworld books in the hospital ).

I find that the most useful attitude is to ignore negative prognoses. Even specialists don't know everything, and we're all different. Read the first few posts in Artie's thread and ask yourself whether you would have thought Artie would still be with us 6 months later. He wouldn't, if artiemom had given up on him, or if LTS3 hadn't found him a great doctor, or if this site didn't exist to supply support, encouragement, and suggestions.



Oh, good idea! Of course, it won't work on everything, but then, what does? I am definitely going to get some ammonia to use on kitchen counters; I'm so tired of the cat shedding directly into the food as I'm making it. Just because she doesn't mind swallowing (and spitting up) fur is no reason for me to do the same.



Here, too, ever since the local coyote pack that probably killed my Floppy died out. (I heard a rumor about distemper, but I don't know for sure.) However, you're right about those claws. Every time I take Jasmine for a walk she tries to chase rabbits and I have to restrain her. She does not accept the explanation that that cute little prey animal could kill her, after all, don't I know that she's a mighty hunter? (I don't believe she's ever had a chance to kill anything larger than a small spider, except in her dreams. The core of a roll of paper towels doesn't count, except in her imagination.)



The insurance company I was with last year dropped a huge number of doctors, including mine, and there are reliable predictions that they'll be doing the same this year. The other options are Kaiser, which doesn't cover one of the meds I need, and therefore Kaiser doctors won't prescribe it, and a company that's affiliated only with certain religious groups, and I don't trust any religion (especially these two) to make health care decisions for me.

I do have catastrophic hospitalization, for a few pennies a month after the federal subsidy. It's from the same company I was with last year, so I don't actually trust it, but I'm willing to gamble a couple of dollars on it, and I don't expect to actually need it (famous last words). The biggest danger is probably from the DES I was exposed to in utero. (Diethylstilbestrol - Wikipedia) No one really knows what will happen to aging DES daughters; since the cancer that comes from DES was previously found only in very elderly women it seems likely that we're more at risk as we age. And given the location of that cancer I'm even more distrustful of religious groups making the decisions.

No one has ever said that the ACA is perfect. During the extensive negotiations required to pass it, certain major protections that the Democrats wanted had to be dropped. I got caught in some of the 'Gotchas' that were added.





You can talk about it with us as much as you want.

Margret

Attitude is important. So--play away! (We really need a guitar playing smiley.)

HA! We keep the same kind of sleeping schedule! I had to get very firm with Suzanne about not calling me before 11am at the earliest.



Doesn't sound horrible. That's what cats do. It never serves one well to deny the basic nature of a predator, and cats are apex predators in their weight class.



Yes, it was, and inexcusable. I might have hung up and changed my phone number.



She is thinking of the naked mole rat, which does, indeed, live to be 30 years old. It is an easy mistake to make, confusing "naked mole rat" with "mole."



My heart goes out to you and your family.

I'm thinking that, given how many rabbits there are this year (compared to previous) we're missing a natural predator around here.