- Joined
- Dec 6, 2020
- Messages
- 253
- Purraise
- 218
Like a lot of people out there, I am feeling a bit lost on the cat introductions. I adopted 1.5 year old male Kirby from a foster a month ago. He was originally a TNR from a feral colony that suffered from a bit wound and turned out to be friendly so he was taken in by the rescue group. He was described as a calm cat that loves to sleep and I was told it was struggle to get him to play.
Our resident cat is a 4 year old female, Sango. She came from a hoarding situation and is extremely timid with humans except for us - she hides from strangers. She loves attention from us and was very miserable when we went on vacation for a week in September. She hid from the pet sitters the entire time. Before covid, we used to go on 2 week+ vacations, so we wanted to get her a friend.
The problem is, Kirby really loves to play and no matter how much I play with him, he never tires out. I suspect this was always his personality, but the foster never knew because he was sick with giardia (which lost us a week of introduction while I had him isolated on meds). This translates into Kirby always pouncing on Sango. I’ve tried to break up these chases by using a spray bottle and then separating him by putting him back in his room. However, I’m not sure if this is teaching him anything
Every so often I’ve been letting things play out to see how she handles it and hope that she defends herself. Tonight I allowed things to happen again, and he chased her around the entire house. I wished it hadn’t gone so far - it went very fast! Eventually she hid under the couch. Then, she went to me for protection by jumping on my lap. He’s not attacking her with claws out and it’s mostly play I think? Regardless, she is very freaked out by it. I had to separate him and put him back in his room.
Is there any hope for things to ever work out? They do have times where he will lay near her on the couch and groom her face - but even this sometimes this looks a bit aggressive (I thought I saw him kind of nipped her on the front of her neck before, but it was hard to tell for sure).
I’ve been trying to play with him behind 2 stacked baby gates to tire him out, but he still goes after her if I let him in the room with her. She used to defend herself when we first introduced them by swiping and hissing at him, but it’s like she’s just given up? I give Sango lots of play and treats to help her confidence, but she just won’t fight back and is always the victim.
I know a month is not a long time, but I’m very frustrated. I even tried plugging in a Feliway multi cat diffuser and so far, it hasn’t made a difference (it’s only been plugged in for a day so far though).
Does anyone have any tips to help calm this crazy teenage boy and leave the girl alone? This is so stressful.
Our resident cat is a 4 year old female, Sango. She came from a hoarding situation and is extremely timid with humans except for us - she hides from strangers. She loves attention from us and was very miserable when we went on vacation for a week in September. She hid from the pet sitters the entire time. Before covid, we used to go on 2 week+ vacations, so we wanted to get her a friend.
The problem is, Kirby really loves to play and no matter how much I play with him, he never tires out. I suspect this was always his personality, but the foster never knew because he was sick with giardia (which lost us a week of introduction while I had him isolated on meds). This translates into Kirby always pouncing on Sango. I’ve tried to break up these chases by using a spray bottle and then separating him by putting him back in his room. However, I’m not sure if this is teaching him anything
Every so often I’ve been letting things play out to see how she handles it and hope that she defends herself. Tonight I allowed things to happen again, and he chased her around the entire house. I wished it hadn’t gone so far - it went very fast! Eventually she hid under the couch. Then, she went to me for protection by jumping on my lap. He’s not attacking her with claws out and it’s mostly play I think? Regardless, she is very freaked out by it. I had to separate him and put him back in his room.
Is there any hope for things to ever work out? They do have times where he will lay near her on the couch and groom her face - but even this sometimes this looks a bit aggressive (I thought I saw him kind of nipped her on the front of her neck before, but it was hard to tell for sure).
I’ve been trying to play with him behind 2 stacked baby gates to tire him out, but he still goes after her if I let him in the room with her. She used to defend herself when we first introduced them by swiping and hissing at him, but it’s like she’s just given up? I give Sango lots of play and treats to help her confidence, but she just won’t fight back and is always the victim.
I know a month is not a long time, but I’m very frustrated. I even tried plugging in a Feliway multi cat diffuser and so far, it hasn’t made a difference (it’s only been plugged in for a day so far though).
Does anyone have any tips to help calm this crazy teenage boy and leave the girl alone? This is so stressful.