When To Step In?

[ArtNJ]

I agree with susanm9006 pretty much, but it does seem possible that they are close enough to actual fighting that this will go sideways the second your back is turned. Two to three weeks is not a super long introduction. Some people have gone a good bit longer where the cats are showing signs of difficulty. You are kind of in a grey area perhaps. I think you need to make a judgment call as to whether you can keep going without them actually fighting, and if you can't, you could try getting back into an extended introduction process.

There does sometimes come a point with some of these things where rehoming one cat starts to look best for everyone, but things could still end up going well if you stick with it. If you have a friend that wants a cat, that is different, but if we are talking about taking a spot in a no kill shelter, I'd personally not give up. Introductions going like this have turned around many times.

 

[Buffster7]

Thank you both very much for your input. I feel at such a loss at this point in the process.

If they fight and I mean high pitched cat fight screaming followed by biting then I think it does diminish the chances they will be friends or that you would need to do a reintroduction. But each taking turns hissing and growling at one another seems to me to just be posturing and figuring each other out.

Okay, I may just need to get brave enough to refrain from intervening. With the bottle-brush tails and facing off and growling it felt that they were THIS close to fighting. But I don't know for certain. I can keep intervening if more time is needed to prevent a fight, but I get discouraged when I think of being in this same spot in 2 weeks, still intervening and not making any progress.

I think you need to make a judgment call as to whether you can keep going without them actually fighting, and if you can't, you could try getting back into an extended introduction process.

When you say an extended introduction process, is that similar to what I have going on now? Finn is in his own room for all but one hour of the day. That seems to be the max amount of time they can be out together before one of them ticks the other one off and they then start the swatting/hissing/chasing/nipping nonsense.

 

[susanm9006]

My point. You can’t intervene forever and to rehome one cat without really knowing it wasn’t going to work would be difficult too. 50-50 chance in my book that they may be growling and hissing at one another because both are afraid of the other rather than each wanting a fight. Personally I would want to find out which it is.

 

[ArtNJ]

If you were to retreat a bit, I think it should be to the "they can see each other but not interact" stage. Sometimes people double stack baby gates in a door to achieve this. A door can also be cracked via door jambs on each side. A week or two of that might get them more used to each other. Or not.

However, Susan is not wrong either. Its a judgment call.

 

[Buffster7]

Okay, I'm chewing on this. There's no way I'm ready to re-home as I'm very attached to the little guy already. I will give it everything I have and all the time I can before I do that. I just get concerned that when they interact through the door they are fine. When they're first out and about together they are fine. Something about being out together for any length of time seems to bring out that aggressive side to both of their natures. But...maybe the ARE just posturing. I may try to keep intervening for another week, and then stay out of it and see what happens. Thank you guys, you've given me food for thought.

 

[pearl99]

I feel so badly about Finn being cooped up in one bedroom all day every day that I fed Charlie in my room and have him closed in there for now and Finn is exploring the house. Is this a bad idea? Is this going to make Charlie even angrier?

I've usually swapped rooms/areas of the home equally when introducing, so both cats' scents are all over and less claim to a certain territory- sometimes one day in one place including night time for each then switch, or half a day if I had a day off, and alternate who is where at night time if it's a partial day in one place.
And giving them both attention and some play when isolated.

 

[Buffster7]

I've usually swapped rooms/areas of the home equally when introducing, so both cats' scents are all over and less claim to a certain territory- sometimes one day in one place including night time for each then switch, or half a day if I had a day off, and alternate who is where at night time if it's a partial day in one place.
And giving them both attention and some play when isolated.

You know, I've given Resident Cat run of the house and New Cat stays in his room all day. Should I switch that when I leave? Put resident cat in the room and let new cat have run of the house? Or maybe close new cat in my bedroom where resident sleeps, and put resident in new cat's room for the day?

 

[pearl99]

Either one based on what you feel and know about them, and maybe try it first on a day you are off to see how they do?
New kitty may need to explore the house on his own, and resident may need to feel good being in a room with new kitty scent all over.

 

[walli]

When your ready, I think leaving them out longer might be the answer.
when they are out there is tension between the 3 of you, need that to subside.
I still think they are doing well. Just need to get over the hump of the initial stress when together, I don't have an answer for that, but somehow if they can get through the initial stress they will have a different situation to relax.

 

[Buffster7]

What to do next, please?

I just got home and let the cats out for a while. They were actually doing really well! I was calm, no nerves, and I was unpacking groceries. I fed them in each others rooms because Finn inhales food and Charlie is a slow eater. So I fed Finn in Charlie's room and vice versa. That may not have been the best move since Finn is territorial about his room, but they both seemed to do well and didn't pay each other any mind when I let them out of their rooms. I went back to the kitchen and they were both doing their own thing. I got a phone call, and while on the phone, I hear yells. It wasn't drawn-out cat yells. It sounded like yelps. They had broken apart when I entered the room. I don't know who started it.

I picked Finn up and stroked him while I knelt down and stroked Charlie. Charlie flopped and laid down. I put Finn back in his room and came out to check on Charlie. He is laying here and not hiding which I take to be a good sign. What are my next steps? Do I keep them apart for a couple hours and then try it again? Or is this a major setback and I start from scratch?

 

[susanm9006]

This isn’t a major setback, it is actually a step forward. They got into it but not a full out fight, they broke off, no one was injured and no one ran to hide. I would let Finn out and see what happens next.

 

[Willowy]

Yeah, it's a good sign they broke it off before you had to break it up. If they were really intent on fighting, you'd have to throw water on them to break them up. I think they're doing fine!

 

[Buffster7]

Well, I let Finn out while Charlie was in the home office where he likes to hang out while I made a couple phone calls. When I was done, I let Charlie out with Finn in my arms. I stroked them both, then put Finn down a good ways away from Charlie. He made a beeline for Charlie. Charlie hissed and ran, and Finn chased. I followed them into the living room and intercepted before they got into it. Finn is now back in his room. I just feel sick over this.

 

[walli]

actually it wasn't bad if it was bad you would not have been able to pick Finn up and pet Charlie, don't worry girl!
Your still doing ok, they are not full on fighting.
we just gotta get them out long enough to get bored and relax!
you will get there!
Your doing great by the way!

 

[walli]

What would happen if you held Charlie and let Finn out?
What about putting Charlie in the cage that Finn was in while Charlie was out?
Just reaching for ways for Finn to calm down while he is out.

 

[Buffster7]

actually it wasn't bad if it was bad you would not have been able to pick Finn up and pet Charlie, don't worry girl!

Yeah, my fear is just that if I hadn't intervened, it would have been that bad. Finn definitely was fixated on Charlie and wanted another chance at him. During the first tussle, I'm pretty sure the yelps I heard were from Charlie. My guess was that Finn cornered and pounced him. Charlie had a little extra fur on him (his own fur...hard to tell if it ws pulled out or just shedding as he's shedding right now, but it was a tiny little clump) and Finn's fur was wet like Charlie's mouth had been on it. Charlie won't sit still long enough for me to examine him, but I noted the spot he was licking himself and will check him out when he settles.

What would happen if you held Charlie and let Finn out?
What about putting Charlie in the cage that Finn was in while Charlie was out?
Just reaching for ways for Finn to calm down while he is out.

I've let Finn out with Charlie in my arms before. Charlie does not like to be picked up, especially when Finn is on the ground, so I don't do it. I could put Charlie in the cage, but part of me doesn't want the resident cat caged, especially when he appears to be being 'hunted' in his own home. I'm actually starting to get a little pissed off at this whole situation. I don't know how you have been doing this for a year, Walli, and are so patient with it!

 

[walli]

Yeah I get it!!!
Our fight was full on ferocious, don't give up hope!
Can you keep Finn's door open so they can socialize between the door for awhile?
if your worried about the opening I would block all the way to the top of the door.
Don't feel guilty about having to leave Finn in the room, maybe he will start getting it, be a punk - stay in room!

 

[Buffster7]

Yeah I get it!!!
Our fight was full on ferocious, don't give up hope!
Can you keep Finn's door open so they can socialize between the door for awhile?
if your worried about the opening I would block all the way to the top of the door.
Don't feel guilty about having to leave Finn in the room, maybe he will start getting it, be a punk - stay in room!

I have a 6 foot shelving up in front of the baby gate. It's the extra tall baby gate. He jumps the baby gate and scales the shelving. I put another baby gate on top of the shelving, and I found him sitting on TOP of it looking for a way to jump down. There's no way to get anything to the very top of the door frame as the extra tall baby gate allows room for one more baby gate and then there's a little room at the top which he can get through. I have tried about everything I can think of - he cannot be contained other than keeping the door closed. Regardless, they don't socialize through the door. Charlie eats and then goes land lays down in another room. I don't mean to be one of those people that shoots down every suggestion that's offered, I just have tried everything to keep him contained and nothing has worked. Tomorrow is a new day, but man, if they get into it again, I'm going to have to consider rehoming and that thought just makes me so sad.