Ok, this is probably going to be pretty long, so if you don't feel like reading it please skip on, I won't mind []
My fiance and I have been engaged since Valentine's Day (aw, isn't that sweet, lol). I got my dress a couple weeks later (not my idea, future-mil got it for me). We planned on a June, 2008 wedding. Sounds good, right?
Well, see, Dave (fiance) wants to be a youth counselor at our church. Oh, by the way, we live together. The problem is that Dave can't counsel youth while we're "living in sin." He's also really anxious to get married, although he's not particularly interested in the wedding and inviting everyone part of it.
The original June 2008 plan went something like this: Have wedding ceremony and reception at a beautiful local park, on a Saturday morning. Have brunch afterwards, maybe some music playing, dancing, stuff like that. End early afternoon and be done with it.
Now Dave wants to get married ASAP. Not by the justice of the peace, but by the pastor, because he wants to get married before God, which is understandable. The problem is that we have absolutely no money to have any sort of wedding. We both just started new jobs a few weeks ago. We have no savings, and none of our parents are going to help with expenses.
We are lucky that we don't have to pay for this stuff:
Dress (already have it)
Cake (my step-mom's a pastry chef)
DJ (fiance's aunt and uncle are professional DJs)
Some of the food (my grandma will provide the majority, I just have to make up the excess)
However, that means we still have a lot to pay for.
Now, Dave's idea was to have a very small ceremony, just parents/grandparents invited, at the church in December. I wouldn't wear my dress, and he wouldn't wear a tux. We'd all go out to eat somewhere afterwards and everyone pays for themselves. My problem with this, as my grandma pointed out, is that if we do that, what's the point of having a June 08 "renewal of our vows"? I'd just have to get dressed up, walk down the aisle again, and have to pay for everyone to eat and stuff. I'd also most likely just decide not to do it at all, and then have wasted my future MIL's money on my dress.
We've thought about just doing the whole darn wedding in December, and getting it done and over with. The problem is that we can't possibly afford it, we don't even have our rings yet! The minimum number of guests will be around 85 or so, and that's just family and only the friends we need to be in the wedding party (which, by the way, is just me plus two girls, and Dave plus two guys). I've tried talking to Dave about only inviting parents/siblings/grandparents/best friends, but that's just the way it's done in his family.
I know this probably doesn't make any sense at all, and believe me, it doesn't make any sense in my head either. I just want to have a nice, simple wedding. No catering, my grandma will provide the food. We already have music lined up, as well as a cake and my dress. The problem is that we can't afford to feed 85 people in December. By June we could, because we will have been saving for a while then. It still won't be glamorous, but I'm not that kind of girl.
Please help if you can, I know ya'll have some great ideas. I just need to figure out the best course to get this done. My grandfather's very sick with cancer right now, and I want him to see my walk down the aisle before he passes away, I just don't know how. Please give me some ideas about how this can possibly work!
Thanks so much if you read this everyone, I really appreciate it!
My fiance and I have been engaged since Valentine's Day (aw, isn't that sweet, lol). I got my dress a couple weeks later (not my idea, future-mil got it for me). We planned on a June, 2008 wedding. Sounds good, right?
Well, see, Dave (fiance) wants to be a youth counselor at our church. Oh, by the way, we live together. The problem is that Dave can't counsel youth while we're "living in sin." He's also really anxious to get married, although he's not particularly interested in the wedding and inviting everyone part of it.
The original June 2008 plan went something like this: Have wedding ceremony and reception at a beautiful local park, on a Saturday morning. Have brunch afterwards, maybe some music playing, dancing, stuff like that. End early afternoon and be done with it.
Now Dave wants to get married ASAP. Not by the justice of the peace, but by the pastor, because he wants to get married before God, which is understandable. The problem is that we have absolutely no money to have any sort of wedding. We both just started new jobs a few weeks ago. We have no savings, and none of our parents are going to help with expenses.
We are lucky that we don't have to pay for this stuff:
Dress (already have it)
Cake (my step-mom's a pastry chef)
DJ (fiance's aunt and uncle are professional DJs)
Some of the food (my grandma will provide the majority, I just have to make up the excess)
However, that means we still have a lot to pay for.
Now, Dave's idea was to have a very small ceremony, just parents/grandparents invited, at the church in December. I wouldn't wear my dress, and he wouldn't wear a tux. We'd all go out to eat somewhere afterwards and everyone pays for themselves. My problem with this, as my grandma pointed out, is that if we do that, what's the point of having a June 08 "renewal of our vows"? I'd just have to get dressed up, walk down the aisle again, and have to pay for everyone to eat and stuff. I'd also most likely just decide not to do it at all, and then have wasted my future MIL's money on my dress.
We've thought about just doing the whole darn wedding in December, and getting it done and over with. The problem is that we can't possibly afford it, we don't even have our rings yet! The minimum number of guests will be around 85 or so, and that's just family and only the friends we need to be in the wedding party (which, by the way, is just me plus two girls, and Dave plus two guys). I've tried talking to Dave about only inviting parents/siblings/grandparents/best friends, but that's just the way it's done in his family.
I know this probably doesn't make any sense at all, and believe me, it doesn't make any sense in my head either. I just want to have a nice, simple wedding. No catering, my grandma will provide the food. We already have music lined up, as well as a cake and my dress. The problem is that we can't afford to feed 85 people in December. By June we could, because we will have been saving for a while then. It still won't be glamorous, but I'm not that kind of girl.
Please help if you can, I know ya'll have some great ideas. I just need to figure out the best course to get this done. My grandfather's very sick with cancer right now, and I want him to see my walk down the aisle before he passes away, I just don't know how. Please give me some ideas about how this can possibly work!
Thanks so much if you read this everyone, I really appreciate it!