UPDATE: 50% success. One cat still hates the new cat.

[str3ssed0ut]

Here is the first post I made about our new cat situation: Attempt #2 - I feel like giving up. (info on all three cats involved is in the previous thread). Writing that one and reading responses was so comforting, so I thought I'd post an update.

Things started out bleak, I must admit. Since then, we've made tremendous progress between my cat and one of his cats, Aldous (M, 1yo). Aldous and Clarence (new F cat, 4yo) have now been introduced in the same room together. They eat treats, play, and give each other plenty of space with little intervention from us. Today they came almost nose to nose a couple times with no negative reactions whatsoever.

Her and Graves (second M cat, 1yo), however, are the complete opposite story. There was an incident when we were feeding them all through the screen once; I took my eyes off her for a second, and she charged through the screen completely, and chased Graves down the stairs. They ended up snarling at each other in a corner, but thankfully no physical fight was exchanged. I was able to just grab her and separate them again. This was after making significant progress with no obvious signs of aggression anymore, which is why I was caught so off guard by her charging the screen.

Ever since then, which was about 2 weeks ago, they've been extremely on edge about each other's scents. She seems to have mostly gotten over it, but Graves will now even try to attack things just because they smell like her. She still gets some defensive body language when they make eye contact. We've gone back to giving them treats through the door, and putting Graves in her room/giving him treats while her and Aldous get to meet in person. I understand why they don't trust each other, I blame myself, but hopefully it's still recoverable. Graves is extremely territorial. When they met through the screen, he got nervous when she went to explore the house and he couldn't see her anymore. I honestly have wondered if it was a bad surgery and he isn't full fixed, because he's just that level of obsessed/upset about her presence.

I assume that that's the right thing to do, start over scent swapping and positive associations between her and Graves, but I was wondering if anyone has any other tips to help speed up the process, or ideas as to why Graves was so extremely territorial to begin with. Is it possible for a cat to not be fully fixed, or is it just his personality?

Thank you <3

 

[rubysmama]

Sorry to read about the setback between the 2 cats. Unfortunately, that is not uncommon, and in fact TCS has an article written just for that type of situation. How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction | TheCatSite

No 2 cat introductions are the same, and some just go slower, and bumpier, than others. All you can do is be patient, and keep doing what you've been doing.

About a cat not being fully fixed, we have heard of cases where some ovarian tissue wasn't removed during a female's spay, and the cat continuing to have heat cycles. But I don't recall anything similar about a male's neuter. One way you might be able to assure yourself that his neuter was done correctly, is noting the smell of his urine. An intact male's urine is tomcat stinky, so if your male cat's pee smells normal, he's probably properly neutered, and his territorial nature is just part of his personality.

 

[Tobermory]

As rubysmama says, no two introductions are alike and it takes time and patience. I brought Mocha home in 2017 when she was three and finally earlier this year—almost four years later—Lily grudgingly accepted her. It doesn’t mean she didn’t hiss or growl or lunge at Mocha occasionally, but in general, we had an armed truce. By choice, they stayed in different parts of the house, coming together only to eat (where I kept a close watch on them).

One thing that seemed to help was that I made sure I was giving Lily lots of love. Mocha is pretty chill, but Lily had a lot of anxiety and I realized after awhile that I wasn’t paying enough attention to her. She actually got better after I started to go out of my way to spend time talking and petting and combing her. It showed her she was loved, and it helped her relax.

 

[str3ssed0ut]

Sorry to read about the setback between the 2 cats. Unfortunately, that is not uncommon, and in fact TCS has an article written just for that type of situation. How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction | TheCatSite

No 2 cat introductions are the same, and some just go slower, and bumpier, than others. All you can do is be patient, and keep doing what you've been doing.

About a cat not being fully fixed, we have heard of cases where some ovarian tissue wasn't removed during a female's spay, and the cat continuing to have heat cycles. But I don't recall anything similar about a male's neuter. One way you might be able to assure yourself that his neuter was done correctly, is noting the smell of his urine. An intact male's urine is tomcat stinky, so if your male cat's pee smells normal, he's probably properly neutered, and his territorial nature is just part of his personality.

Sorry it took me a while to reply, but thank you for your response! I've never noticed anything off or extra smelly in how his pee smells, so we're probably all clear. His nature is still very frustrating, but through slow reintroduction, things have gotten slightly better. We intervene every time he gets "stalky" over where the new cat is going to prevent fights, and he's slowly becoming less concerned about her every move when they're in the same room together. Hopefully we'll be fully integrated shortly! Thanks again.

 

[str3ssed0ut]

As rubysmama says, no two introductions are alike and it takes time and patience. I brought Mocha home in 2017 when she was three and finally earlier this year—almost four years later—Lily grudgingly accepted her. It doesn’t mean she didn’t hiss or growl or lunge at Mocha occasionally, but in general, we had an armed truce. By choice, they stayed in different parts of the house, coming together only to eat (where I kept a close watch on them).

One thing that seemed to help was that I made sure I was giving Lily lots of love. Mocha is pretty chill, but Lily had a lot of anxiety and I realized after awhile that I wasn’t paying enough attention to her. She actually got better after I started to go out of my way to spend time talking and petting and combing her. It showed her she was loved, and it helped her relax.

I appreciate your response, even though I haven't had time to reply in a while! Four years is such a long time; I applaud your patience! We've noticed the same thing in Graves; giving him lots of extra attention, especially through long play so it tires him out at the same time, has definitely improved his behavior a little, even if it's purely because it distracts him for longer. We're making progress again lately, with all three cats hanging in the living room! I'm very excited to have them all fully integrated, but thanks again for your encouraging reminder to be patient!

 

[rubysmama]

His nature is still very frustrating, but through slow reintroduction, things have gotten slightly better.

"Slightly better" is good. Hopefully things will keep improving. Good luck.