The "What's on your mind?" Thread -2017

[arouetta]

Something to consider is a co-morbid diagnosis. There is a crazy high number of people with an ASD that also have ADHD. My daughter is one of those people, and while sometimes it's tough to figure out which one is causing a behavior, once we do she does well. Figuring it out is necessary as coping techniques/behavior modification techniques are waaaay different so we know how to approach it.

Before anyone jumps on that last statement, my daughter is sick and tired of "being weird" and is willing to work on it so she isn't automatically thought of in that manner by strangers and acquaintances. She's also sick and tired of her words being misinterpreted and she gets frustrated because she doesn't know what's going on and she's also willing to work hard to fix those issues as well.

 

[Willowy]

Something to consider is a co-morbid diagnosis.

Yeah, it's possible that she has ADD and ASD. Definitely not the H part though . That child will not move 6 inches if she can figure out a way to avoid it, lol.

A family once visited our church, they said their daughter was diagnosed with Asperger's (at the time; it was about 15 years ago) and ADHD. Wow, she was a mile a minute. Maybe 100 miles a minute. Of course everybody is different so I can't base anybody else's diagnosis on her. But wow. If they ever figured out how to harness her brain energy she could have done a lot. It's figuring out how to harness it that's the problem. I wonder how her adulthood is going.

 

[arouetta]

Unless the last DSM changed it, I haven't bothered to look, the actual name is AD/HD, Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, and then as a qualifier they specify "with hyperactivity" or "without hyperactivity". Girls for whatever reason tend to not have hyperactivity, they have attention deficit and impulsivity instead. And then there are the exceptions like my daughter, eep. ADD vs ADHD hasn't existed in like 10 or 15 years...maybe even 20.

And that's another rant topic for me. All these people who claim it's a nonsense disorder that is used only for impatient teachers and pharmaceutical companies - please explain to me why my father was diagnosed with ADHD in 1962.

 

[tallyollyopia]

I do have a sweet husband.
I'm glad slim fast is helping with your hunger pangs. I had my wisdom teeth removed way back when and i was on a liquid diet for a while. My mouth is too small for my teeth and they were growing sideways into my other teeth and they had to be cut out. One had to be shattered and pulled out piece by piece. It was miserable and I felt like I was starving to death. I got some slim fast in the hopes that it would suppress my appetite and I wouldn't feel so hungry all the time. It didn't work. I definitely didn't need to lose weight! I did anyway. Liquid diets do that, apparently. I looked horrible and it took me forever to put it back on.

As I've mentioned before, my mother was a physical therapist. She basically ran both the P.T. and O.T. departments at her hospital for a very long time, in addition to giving treatments.

When I was 16 or so I had some atypical bleeding from the aureole of one breast, and my mother told me to go down the hall to the emergency room and have it looked at, since we could basically get it for free that way. It stumped the doctors (eventually it turned out that one of the little capillaries happened to intersect one of the pores) and they were talking about it over my head (they thought) using worrisome terms like "exploratory" and "carcinoma," and I thought (and very carefully did not say out loud), "Boy, if you guys only knew who my mother is you wouldn't be talking this way where I can hear!"

Margret

Yup.

My mother has worked as a nurse since before I was born. When I was around 8, I helped her study for her boards so she could get her LPN license so I've known most of the terms since I was very young. Even now, if I'm unsure about something, I'll call her. And she doesn't always trust doctors, either. It's a good thing, too. Several years ago, my great uncle had to go to the ER. I don't remember why, but she went with him to kind of supervise the doctor. He ordered an MRI. My mom said, "you realize he has a pacemaker, right?" The doctor said, "yes, it's right here in his chart." "But you want to do an MRI?" "Yes." She then had to explain to a licensed doctor why that would kill him. The ER here is commonly referred to as the morgue. My family only uses this ER if we basically know what's wrong. Otherwise, we go to the next county over.

Our local hospital (the only one for the entire county) used to have a morbid saying about it: Go in because of one organ, come out minus two. About the only thing they've got a reputation for doing well is hosting women for natural labor (I can't tell you how many stories I've heard about women going in for c-sections and losing their appendix "since the doctor was there anyway".

Actually, virtually all professions have jargon, designed (consciously or not) to separate the "in" group from the "out" group. Some of it is necessary; there are specialized words that professionals need that are unique to their profession and related professions. But some of it really is primarily to make their speech unintelligible to outsiders. With the medical profession, have you ever noticed how, every few years, diseases acquire new names? That's to mystify outsiders. For example, "Manic-depressive illness" has now become "Bi-polar disorder." I suppose that could be justified on the basis of "manic" being a pejorative term, but they have to know that most people still think of it as "manic-depressive" anyway.

Margret

Back when I was in high school we used to joke that one of my friends was one step away from being Bi-Polar--and that step was a diagnosis!

My son has two children now in their 20s. At one time or another they were both diagnosed as having Asperger's, but at different stages of the spectrum. Both are highly intelligent and verbal. Both are most comfortable when they are "in a rut", same old same old. The younger one is also a trans which makes things more difficult although we all accept it and refer to him as a her and use her chosen name Rynn (it used to be Richard) and refer to her as my son's daughter. She has moved out and has a job in another state as a manager at Subway and seems to be doing alright, at least so she says. She does not have a driver's license and at this time has no desire to get one, she rides a bike and the bus.

Chris, the other son, is another matter. Even when small, like pre-school, he had some weird behaviors. He claimed that he could not walk barefoot because the grass was hurting his feet. He did not like loud noise and he did not like any kind of music. He would yell out the window that he was being held prisoner although the door to his room was open. Child Protective Services were called numerous times and it was observed that he was indeed not in a closed room while yelling out the window so they stopped coming whenever some concerned neighbor called them.
Both children went to a special school where they both attained excellent grades and graduated from high school. Rynn attended a university out of state on scholarships but did not last past a few months as he/she found the environment too difficult and so returned home with no plans for the future.
Chris had problems even at the special school as he would have outbursts (kicking the walls or the desk whenever something did not go his way) but because it was a special school it was pretty much ignored, there were other kids who acted worse.
Chris has pretty much been ignored by Social Services since then, they just put him on SSI and pretty much forgot about him. His attention span to anything he'd rather not do is extremely short, he'd rather mess with his computer any time, he has a hard time dealing with anything new. Once he was told by some social worker who was evaluating him to go down stairs in an office building to the first floor via the stairs and then come back using the elevator. He could not do that like any ordinary person could, it took him over half an hour to finally return, nobody knows where he was, he said he got lost.
Lately I have been concerned regarding what would happen to him once his parents are no more and told my son he should have Chris evaluated by a counselor, not just a social worker. Apparently that did not go so well.
He was told he should be on some medication and he did not want to do that as he apparently was on one before and it turned him into a zombie and he had a fit (outburst) in the Counselor's office about that. I told my son Chris would need to be on a different medication until they found one that agreed with him, that to have an intelligent verbal person declared to be disabled beyond hope was disgraceful. Apparently the counselor thought he'd do alright perhaps doing circuit board assembly, a mind numbing occupation, what a waste of somebody who could probably do programming.
I wish he lived in California where opportunities for people like him are much more available, but he lives in Reno, NV and social services there are pathetic. Unfortunately I live an age restricted community so I can't have him here, I don't think he would want to be here anyway as I would ride herd on him and he would not like that one bit. If he lived here I would insist on a counselor doing the right thing. My son is not home much as he drives a big rig and his wife is not much in regard to insisting what Chris needs.
So, this is a long rant regarding Asperger's/Spectrum. I don't know what else I can do to help Chris who is a long way from what his brother/sister is doing although they are both "on the spectrum", both verbal, both very intelligent, both "stuck in a rut" but dealing with it in a different fashion. Chris will need to be self-sufficient or he will be "warehoused'
sooner or later, what a waste. Does anybody ave any ideas?

None here, sorry.

 

[Kat0121]

I washed my sheets a little while ago. One of the cats decided to use one of the pillowcases as a napkin after dinner.

I imagine it went like this:

"Hmm. I seem to have food on my face. Shall I groom myself or use one of mom's pillowcases?"



"Pillowcase it is... now which one... there are so many to choose from" (7)

"This one is too old... this one is sorta new.... AHA! this one is brand new! We have a winner!"

So I found the gravy smeared pillow case and washed the sheets. As I was putting them back on the bed, Sophie decided to supervise. She ran all over the bottom sheet to investigate then found a spot to relax at the top of the bed. She watched me put the top sheet on then ran around that. After the pillows were back and the blanket was on, she did a last check of the whole bed and wandered off. I wonder if she was trying to tell me that she was the gravy wiping bandit.

 

[Margret]

Unless the last DSM changed it, I haven't bothered to look, the actual name is AD/HD, Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, and then as a qualifier they specify "with hyperactivity" or "without hyperactivity". Girls for whatever reason tend to not have hyperactivity, they have attention deficit and impulsivity instead. And then there are the exceptions like my daughter, eep. ADD vs ADHD hasn't existed in like 10 or 15 years...maybe even 20.

And that's another rant topic for me. All these people who claim it's a nonsense disorder that is used only for impatient teachers and pharmaceutical companies - please explain to me why my father was diagnosed with ADHD in 1962.

I never said or meant that it's a nonsense disorder, or that it's used only for impatient teachers and pharmaceutical companies. I believe it's over-used; it seems to be the first thing teachers think of, and some of them insist that they won't teach a particular student unless he or she is medicated. Sometimes that's justified, and teachers are likely to be the first to spot it, but medicating students isn't a proper substitute for a teacher doing his or her job, and some teachers seem to use it that way.

As arouetta mentioned:

Figuring it out is necessary as coping techniques/behavior modification techniques are waaaay different so we know how to approach it.

If there's a problem, the first step toward doing something about it is to accurately describe/diagnose the problem, and that's unlikely when the real problem doesn't happen to match preconceived notions.

Back when I was in high school we used to joke that one of my friends was one step away from being Bi-Polar--and that step was a diagnosis!

Yep!

Back when the house guests from hell (the ones who got Floppy killed) were trying to insist that Floppy had "run away" because she was so disgusted by my housekeeping, a friend named Gary came over to give me a ride to my computer club, and one of them suggested that I invite Gary into our bedroom so he could see for himself how awful my housekeeping really is (I never claimed otherwise, and considering that Roger and I were occupying the smallest bedroom in the house while they were occupying the rest of the house I couldn't conceivably have done better). I informed her that, while Gary was a good friend, that did not give him bedroom privileges. Poor Gary just stood there looking confused (he knew all about how Floppy disappeared, and that the house guests knew nothing about cats). As we were on our way out to the car, Gary asked me "Is she manic depressive or something?" Roger told me later exactly how I should have responded: "Well, we've never noticed that she gets depressed."

Time, oh time, turn back in your flight
I thought of the comeback I needed last night.

(I wish I could remember what book I got that from.)

Margret

 

[kashmir64]

Our local hospital (the only one for the entire county) used to have a morbid saying about it: Go in because of one organ, come out minus two. About the only thing they've got a reputation for doing well is hosting women for natural labor (I can't tell you how many stories I've heard about women going in for c-sections and losing their appendix "since the doctor was there anyway".

This is why we call ours 'Hack-Um-Up-Hospital'.

 

[kashmir64]

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Or as my people call it - WTH were we thinking day.

 

[tallyollyopia]

This is why we call ours 'Hack-Um-Up-Hospital'.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Or as my people call it - WTH were we thinking day.

Sounds like a real story behind that saying...

 

[tallyollyopia]

It's Thanksgiving, so I thought I'd share some funny stories about my kitties.

One of the things that Grandma used to have (and is now cluttering the living room) is a little squirrel figurine about two inches high. One morning while I was winding down from work I heard this strange thumping against the coffee table. Curious I got up and looked to see that Princess was trying to play with the squirrel, and was getting very upset that it wasn't doing anything. Finally she looked up at me like, "Mom, what the hay?"

We left the boxes that the space heaters came in around the house (Christmas is coming, after all), and earlier tonight I heard an odd noise and went to investigate. Ra had tipped one of the boxes over and was meticulously pulling the cardboard inserts, plastic, and instruction manual out of the box. He then crawled into the box--but it only covered his front. His rear and tail were out for all to see.

A few days ago Spot brought a bird to the back porch, but we wouldn't let him in with it. So, frustrated, he worked the kill open, pulled out the heart, and then got entry--where he proudly dropped the heart at my feet.

When we first got the space heaters, none of the cats knew what to make of them. Spot found a place in the laundry room that got heat from the one in the kitchen, without being close enough that he was in danger if it decided to attack. Asia would only go around the space heaters if she could could keep pace with a human--keeping the human between her and the heater. Ra pretended to ignore them at first--but freaked out when the oscillating one moved (it took a while to find the button to make it do that. Princess has just avoided them as much as possible. Anyway, I said that to say this: when we first got the heaters, one of them went in my room and I turned on the space heater for my room and closed the door so that it could get warm in there. When I stepped into the hall I saw Asia laying on AWM's bed, staring at me like I was some kind of alien. After a moment I realized why: in all three years of her life, she has never seen me close the door before. Open it after other people have closed it, sure. But she's never seen me close it before--I haven't since Rose gave birth to them in my room. Poor kitty!

 

[kashmir64]

Not only is it Thanksgiving, but it is also Doctor Who day.

Happy Doctor Who day everyone.

 

[segelkatt]

Look into group homes. They are for people who can't quite live on their own but can manage part of what it takes to live on their own (hold a job, clean their room, cook, stuff like that). Back in the day waiting lists were long, up to 10 years, so if you guys look into a group home and think it's where he would fit, get on the waiting list immediately.

Group homes won't let him keep his computer and the ones around Reno are all for people with low mental capacity so that is not an option. Still looking though and apparently he has now decided that having a job would not be so bad. After he big accident where he was in the hospital for 2 1/2 month getting rehabilitated he has thought that maybe he could work as an orderly taking people from here to there, the one he had suffered from Down's Syndrome and Chris thought this would be an easy job and pays well and there are never enough people to do that. He even asked how much training it would take (6 months). While I can't picture him doing that for any length of time at least he is now thinking about a job which he never did before (just like a child).

 

[arouetta]

These are on Autism Speaks website as resources in Reno. Maybe they can help.
Washoe Arc
Department of Housing and Urban Development

 

[Alicia88]

Happy Thanksgiving!
We're celebrating tomorrow with John's family. My family doesn't really get together anymore. It makes me feel a little sad. When I was a kid, my mom, and my uncles, and all their families gathered at my grandparents place for Thanksgiving and Christmas. When I was in California, I always called to talk to everyone at once. Then my grandpa broke his hip and had to go to a nursing home and my grandma moved into senior citizen housing to be close enough to drive over there every day and spend the whole day with him. He died just a few months after I made it back home so at least I got to say goodbye but I don't think he recognized me. Alzheimers is pretty terrible. Now everyone just does their own thing. I definitely don't have room to host Thanksgiving. My mom is still with the abusive jerk everyone hates and refuses to associate with. And it wouldn't be the same, anyway.
John works tonight and tomorrow night but we're doing Thanksgiving tomorrow at noon.

 

[Margret]

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Or as my people call it - WTH were we thinking day.

I deduce that you're a Native American?

Not only is it Thanksgiving, but it is also Doctor Who day.

Happy Doctor Who day everyone.

Happy Doctor Who day back atcha!

I give up. Is Doctor Who day Thanksgiving, or is it November 23, and what makes it Doctor Who day?

I notice that BBC America is showing a Star Trek marathon today rather than Doctor Who reruns, which would be more fun.

Margret

 

[kashmir64]

I deduce that you're a Native American?


Happy Doctor Who day back atcha!

I give up. Is Doctor Who day Thanksgiving, or is it November 23, and what makes it Doctor Who day?

I notice that BBC America is showing a Star Trek marathon today rather than Doctor Who reruns, which would be more fun.

Margret

November 23rd.
On November 23 1963 the very first episode of Doctor Who aired.

And yes, I'm 1/2 Seminole.

 

[foxxycat]

My friend is on Medicare; they do cover it. She's had lots of bad doctors in the past, and recognizes them when she encounters them; she likes her current doctors and trusts them and I'm not about to argue with her about that.

Basically, despite being older than me she's begun having periods again, very painful periods. The choice is between a D&C and a hysterectomy, and her choice is to simply rip everything out, since right now their only function appears to be to cause her pain. So she's already decided on surgery; that is not an issue, timing is the only remaining issue. She doesn't want to do it in December, which leaves November and January, and her doctors are sufficiently concerned that they're willing to give her precedence for a November date.

The thing is, ovarian cancer is one of the really nasty ones; very hard to catch early, a terribly painful death, and, as we've already discussed in this forum, the blood test for it isn't conclusive. This means that, since it isn't showing up on ultrasound, there's a reasonably good chance that she's lucked out, that she has ovarian cancer but it's shown up early enough to be curable by surgery. Under those circumstances I think she's made the right decision.

It appears that this particular surgeon has either coined a new word himself, or a change in terminology is in progress right now. (The medical community seems to do this every so often, as the general public begins to understand medical terminology, and we can't have that!) Since Google doesn't have it yet it seemed like a good idea to ask whether anyone here recognized it. My guess is that "acancer" is a synonym for "pre-cancer," or possibly, as suggested by arouetta , it means a pre-cancerous adenoma.

Margret

I would get it all yanked too. Any abnormal "stuff going on after menopause probably isn't normal....so not a bad idea to get it yanked.

In 2009 I had the divinci surgery for hysterectomy done. It was a shorter recovery and less chance of infection. Maybe find a surgeon who is qualified to do this surgery. They left my ovaries as the doc said they were not abnormal looking despite my funky cycles. They didn't want to have me go through meno at 34 yrs old. I found the 2 weeks after were the hardest. I boosted my couch up 6" by raising on blocks. That was the best thing I did for preparing. And of course no pulling or pushing for 6 weeks post surgery. I definitely don't regret it.

Hope all having a good turkey day! Spending time at my dad's girlfriends house. House full of kids n people. I'm ready for a nap. Made sweet potatoes and green bean casserole that came out good.

 

[Alicia88]

I'm on the couch with both Connor and Murphy. Murphy is in my arm like a baby and not minding his baby brother's kicking at all. I need to get up to take John to work so I can keep the car and pick Aislyn up later, but I don't know how I can stand to disturb them. I guess John is just going to have to call in! I'm sure comfortable cats are an acceptable excuse, right?

 

[Margret]

November 23rd.
On November 23 1963 the very first episode of Doctor Who aired.

Thank you. And I still question BBC America's judgment running a ST marathon today, but I guess they may think it's more appropriate since Star Trek is an American series.

And yes, I'm 1/2 Seminole.

In that case it wasn't your ancestors who sold Manhattan Island. As for what they were thinking, I believe that they didn't realize they were "selling" anything, merely giving the Europeans the right to camp there for a while. Culture shock, and the culture with the most sophisticated weapons wins the argument. It's one of the least attractive qualities of human nature.

Margret

 

[Margret]

I'm on the couch with both Connor and Murphy. Murphy is in my arm like a baby and not minding his baby brother's kicking at all. I need to get up to take John to work so I can keep the car and pick Aislyn up later, but I don't know how I can stand to disturb them. I guess John is just going to have to call in! I'm sure comfortable cats are an acceptable excuse, right?

Good luck explaining that one to John's employer.

Margret