Sisters Not Getting Along

Matt M PA

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Hello everyone!

I have two almost 8-year-old littermate sisters. They have always got along well, ate side-by-side and played together, slept together. However, both have very different personalities.

A few years ago a strange cat came to our back door and my two cats, Aggie and Allie lashed out at the strange cat. This occurred a few times.

We had no problems for a couple years, until a month or so ago. I've yet to see the other cat or animal that comes to the back door, but it causes my two to fight each other. I resorted closing the door to the porch at night which seemed to work. I had one further incident where Aggie was at the door. Allie heard the commotion and started toward the door by then, Aggie was running in an seemingly aggressive. Allie responded in kind. I put Aggie in the car tree and within a number of hours it all settled down.

We were away for a couple days, so I cut pieces of cardboard so they can look out bay window on the porch. We had a friend check in on them and they were fine. When we returned home Saturday night, why wife took the cardboard out of the windows and we went to bed. At 2AM they were under a bed snarling at each other. I removed one from the altercation and closed the door to that room for the evening. In the morning, they were both acting a bit "off", and seemed to stay to themselves.

I contacted the local emergency vet on Sunday who suggested a couple of the Feliway units. They are running. It was also suggested that since they have been together so long that it will just take some time.

I work at home and yesterday, kept Aggie in the office with me, while Allie had run of the house. Both had letterboxes and food. I carried Aggie upstairs a couple times to "see" her sister, and some minor growling occurred.

I contacted our usually vet who thinks that it was an outside influence that caused this and that we need to just wait it out. She also suggested a treat called "Soliquin". I got a bag of those (ouch$) and Allie likes them, but Aggie does not.

Last night, Allie had retreated to our bedroom, so I took a litterbox and food to her and she's been there today, too. (She hissed once at the closed door, despite her sister not being there. When I went downstairs to where Aggie was...she was responsing with a quiet growl.) Mostly sleeping. Aggie has followed me into the office....also sleeping.

This morning, I noticed a real change in Aggie being more her "normal self" and the same goes for Allie. I'm not in a rush to push them at each other in case I do more harm that good.

If you're still reading, thank you. I'm very concerned about our two girls as they are like children to my wife and I. These two always had a great relationship and I'm glad to try anything to help this get sorted.

Also, I've ordered a motion activated sprinkler for our backyard in hopes of keeping critters away that will cause this to reoccur.
 

rubysmama

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Hello and welcome to TCS. :wave2: Sorry your girls are currently not getting along. That actually happens a lot, even with bonded pairs.

Sometimes it happens after one cat goes to the vet and returns with different scent on them. In your case, it was probably something outside that startled one of them, and they blamed the other.

TCS has a couple articles on the topic that may be helpful.

Here are the links:
How To Deal With Non-recognition Aggression In Cats
Re-directed Aggression In Cats
 

jclark

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Spray them both down with liquid catnip, grab a beer, sit back and watch the show. ;)

Seriously though, I've had good experience with Feliway. Sounds like it might be working for you.
 
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Matt M PA

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Thank you for the replies and welcome! Very much appreciated.

This afternoon, I carried Aggie up to the room where Allie is and cracked the door. Allie meowed at Aggie...but no response from Aggie. In fact, she seemed disinterested. We'll try this again later...
 
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Matt M PA

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Well folks, another update. I went to check on Allie after a thunderstorm and she seemed like she wanted to go out of the bedroom. She was meowing and being friendly. Aggie too, has seemed more herself today.

So, I carried Allie down to where Aggie was. No response from either. I put Allie in the cat tree and fed them both 8 feet apart with Aggie on the ground. No bad reactions yet...so I am optimistic.

Only cat or critter folks can understand the frustration, unhappiness, concern...you get the idea...when cats don't get along.
 

rubysmama

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Fingers crossed that they're friends again. :crossfingers:
 
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Matt M PA

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Tonight, I think we've rounded the corner. They washed each other and played a bit. "Relieved" isn't the word. Not the best pic I ever took of them...
 

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Matt M PA

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Well, it looks like we've made a step back. They were fine for hours, playing washing...usual activity. I was out for a while, but my wife reported all was quiet.

I decided to feed them both, as always with 2 separate bowls on a placemat separated by a shared water bowl. Aggie started to eat...and Allie went to push Aggie to the other bowl. This happens all the time. Tonight, Aggie didn't give and growled. Allie made similar noises.

I don't recall what I said or in what tone to them...but they each went separate ways. Allie went to our bedroom...Aggie to a dining room chair.

I took a litter pan and food dishes to the bedroom...I guess Allie should stay there tonight. Seems to be her safe place. I don't like the idea of them being loose together....just in case...
 
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Matt M PA

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First, I have to say that I'm thankful for the support. Despite having cats my whole life...I've never had two.

Fed them both this morning. One in the cat tree...one on the floor 6 feet away. No problem.

Let them both room. Aggie settled under the coffee table. Allie came around the sofa...they saw each other. Aggie hissed. Then, both growled. I was sitting on the floor near them and I held Aggie facing another way and with some mild intervention (scuffing) could calm each of her growls but didn't prevent her growling again.

I picked Aggie up and took her to the basement office with a pan and food. She's here with me being talkative and purring.

Allie retreated to the bedroom. She will have free roam today. When I saw her in the bedroom, she purred.

I guess it's going to take some more time...and I'm willing to do whatever it takes for my two girls to get along.
 

rubysmama

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I've also been around cats my whole life, but my family, and now myself only ever had one at a time, so I have no experience with cat interactions. But I've learned a lot from reading various threads on this forum.

I see in your first post that you've got Feliway. I've never used it, but have read that there are at least 2 different types. So if you think it's not working, maybe look into one of the other types.

Also there are calming treats that I've seen mentioned before.

As I just mentioned, there's been lots of posts from pet parents whose cats have suddenly started fighting. I just did a search and found a lot of results. Maybe you can scan through them and see if there's any helpful suggestions that might work in your case. Good luck.

Search Results for Query: cats suddenly fighting | TheCatSite
 
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Matt M PA

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Thanks rubysmama! I will review those.

I did get the Feliway Multicat (Have two running in the house) and the treats our Vet offered. Only one cast is willing to eat the treats.

This all started 2AM Sunday, so maybe I am being too optimistic on how quickly it should resolve..
 

catlover73

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I currently have 4 cats myself. It seems like the outside visitor has caused some re-directed aggression between your babies. You can also click the articles button and look in cat behavior for articles about re-directed aggression. There may also be some tips in the articles on non-recognition aggression that are helpful for re-directed aggression. I am posting from my phone right now and it is a pain to post links.

These issues take time and patience to resolve. It can be a few steps forward and then a step back like you saw. That is normal.
 

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Hi there, I am going through pretty much the same thing, and it all started Sunday too! I am kind of at a loss because they will groom and sniff each other just fine for a minute or two, but once they start sniffing the floor and around the room, one starts hissing.

I have 2 sisters who are 2 years old and were raised together. They were very close and loved to play and nap together. But on Sunday I rescued a kitten from the inside of the dashboard in my grandmother's car. I put the kitten in a carrier, put the carrier inside the house because it was very hot and the kitten needed to cool down. Draped the carrier with a towel, left it in one spot. My two cats didn't even get near the kitten--they only smelled her, saw each other, and started attacking one another. The kitten is no longer in the house, she has been relocated to a permanent home.

So far I have been keeping one in a room all day (I check on them every few hours to give some love) with a litter box, food & water, their favorite toys and a blanket for each. I swap them every day so they each get a chance to roam the rest of the house. I have them eat dinner on opposite sides of the door so that they can smell each other and their food, and hopefully make some positive connections. Every morning I crack the door open and let them sniff each other for a while--no hissing, they even groom each other's faces if the door is open enough. But if they both wander down the hallway or sniff around the room, the hissing starts. I have a Feliway multicat diffuser which I just got on Monday, and I can't tell if it's helping or not. I have it in the living room but I'm wondering if I should put it in the shared room or the basement where the kitten was.

Anyway, I just wanted to share some of what I've been doing in case it might help you. It sounds like your babies are more comfortable being around one another and in the same room right now than mine are. Still, it helps to know I'm not the only one struggling with this sort of situation. I'm also a bit impatient about progress... it's hard seeing them fight when they were snuggled up together Sunday morning. But cats aren't people--they can't really sleep these things off and apologize in the morning. It'll just take time and effort to mend their relationship, even though we want to see them be buddies again as soon as possible.

Good luck to you! I would love to hear updates on their progress, as well as any new things you try to help them get along.
 
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Matt M PA

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catlover73, I have reviewed some articles on this site, and am thankful for your response. I figure it's a matter of time for these two to settle down.

kukido, good luck to you too!

Obviously, I can't think like a cat so it's hard to understand. I really believe that Allie wants to be with her sister...as she sat by the basement door for a good while today. Aggie watched the door intently.

They've been good buddies all their lives, so I'm sure this will work out at some point and I'm resolved to keep up the work. Since Aggie was in the office today...she'll be free tomorrow and Allie will spend the day in her quiet place, our bedroom.

What I have been doing is carrying the isolated one to the one thats "loose". See the reaction and if not positive...return her to the room.
 
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Matt M PA

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Yet another update. Brought Aggie upstairs from the office and placed her in the car tree. Fed them both...Aggie in the tree and Allie on the floor...6 feet apart. No problem.

While Aggie was in the tree we three played with a fishing pole game, had some treats...and at one point...both slept..Allie in the front window.

Aggie came out of the tree and wandered into the kitchen. There are no food bowls set up. Allie started down the steps into the kitchen....some growlling ensued and they went their own ways. Allie to the bedroom, Aggie onto a dining room chair.

I think this time, I'm going to leave them loose and watch. Probably have to separate over night to be safe.

I can't understand why the kitchen seems to be a problem...there was no food out.
 
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Matt M PA

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I know, I know...is there any end to Matt's updates?

Today, Aggie had free run. Allie stayed in the bedroom. I brought Allie to where Aggie was and Allie was quietly meowing noises of "I don't want to be here". I took her back to the bedroom. Later, I brought her downstairs into the office so that she's be with me. We again brought her to where her sister was. It took longer, but a few quiet meows and she went back to the bedroom.

Tonight, Aggie is running around like her old self, talkative, etc.

I went up to visit with Allie and give her fresh food and she seems content to stay under the bed. It is her safe place, usually.

I have the bedroom door closed to avoid an altercation...but am wondering if it's right to have her in that room all the time. She seems content there. Or, should I quarantine Aggie tonight and let Allie roam?
 
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Matt M PA

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..how I wish there was a way to edit a post...if there is...I cannot find it..

I carried Aggie up to the bedroom where Allie is. Aggie quietly protested when seeing her sister...just as her sister did earlier...
 
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