Should I get a new cat?

[ygravel001]

Hi there,

The cat on the right is named Aki, she's 9 years old (female). The one on the left was called Natsu, he was 14.5 years old (male) when I had to say goodbye to him last April due to a tumor that was spotted too little too late. Since then, it's just been me and Aki and she's been constantly wanting my attention for months now, especially since I'm working from home because of the pandemic. She has been with Natsu ever since she was 5 months old, so my theory is that she either misses having another cat with her or because Natsu was such a cuddly cat and demanded so much of my attention, that she's saying "it's my turn now".

I love Aki, but she's not the type of cat that cuddles a lot, she likes to be pet and only stays on me for about a minute or so. In short, she's a normal adult cat. I have been fighting anxiety for years without needing medication, but this year, with with the pandemic, the lost of Natsu and a few other things, I finally snapped this and now I'm on meds

I would love to get a new cuddly kitten to help me out and to give Aki someone else to play with, but I the only thing stopping me is the fear that she'll feel isolated if I start paying attention to a kitten. She's 9 years old, 3 years older than when Natsu first met her, so I'm wondering is she's too old for this and if there's a risk of this traumatizing her.

While I understand that everyone here may have an opinion on the subject, I would prefer having responses from either professionals or people that had a similar experience in the past.

Thank you

 

[The Stray Cat Novice]

I'm not a professional, nor have I ever experienced something like this before, but I'd like to help you out just in case nobody else does
I truly, from the bottom of my heart, want to give you my condolences, I'm sure Natsu meant a lot to you. I'd suggest if you'd like to get another kitty to help you and Aki out, get an older cat, since they usually require minimal effort so you can take turns between each cat and share the cuddles and love!

 

[maggie101]

I agree,an older cat. Especially since your cat will need a companion. I have 3 cats now 5,6,7 yrs old. Maggie,6 yrs old is very attached to me and since I rescued Coco,she feels even more left out so I try to spend lots of time with her.

 

[Talien]

I would suggest fostering a Cat first to see how she will react, if it goes well then you can adopt.

 

[Heeter311]

Hi!
I initially started writing a humorous response as my cat is pregnant (unexpectedly). However, I can relate to your situation on multiple levels.

First, I will state that my profession is mental health and NOT with animals. However, I do own 2 cats and 2 dogs and I grew up on a dairy farm with many cats and dogs throughout my life. I will give you my experience and hope it helps, so here it goes:

You are the Alpha, YOU are the most important right now and YOU need to take care of YOU first, so you can be there for Aki. It sounds like you have self-awareness and are doing this. It is a struggle right now and very easy for loneliness, isolation and anxiety to take over. It's my experience that cats are very in tune with human emotions (although the appear to be indifferent to us.) Keeping in mind each individual animal is different, Aki has already shown she has adjusted to other cats, and a kitten is (typically) an easier adjustment. You have given reasons why a kitten/cat will make YOU happier, which will help you be more "present" for Aki.
I went through this same debate over getting another dog. My current dog was a Chihuahua mix, so everything would point to "no", but I evaluated MY situation just like you are.

The breeds I have (Chihuahua, Shiba Inu, Siamese) by all accounts should not be mixed but they live in harmony. It's great to get feedback but remember to trust yourself. You know your pet and your household better than anyone. :-)

 

[neely]

While I understand that everyone here may have an opinion on the subject, I would prefer having responses from either professionals or people that had a similar experience in the past.

Welcome to TCS! I couldn't help but notice this is your first post. I'm not sure what type of professional you're referring to but the members on this site are knowledgeable and experienced cat guardians. We all love and respect cats. Everyone has an individual cat experience to share. If you prefer an opinion from someone in the feline profession it would be best to consult your vet since they know more about Aki and her medical history, personality, etc. My sincere and deepest sympathies on the passing of Natsu.

Regarding a companion for both Aki and you, there are several TCS Articles that may have some helpful advice and info. for you:
How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles
Your Second Cat: How To Choose The Best Friend For Kitty – TheCatSite Articles

My own personal experience when our previous cat who was also 9 years old, same age as Aki, did not go well. She was a real diva who was bonded to our dog but did not accept an older kitten. However, several other cats, ages 2-3 yrs. old who we had prior to her had no problems getting along. There are so many variables from age to personality to environment and if you're planning to adopt, previous history/circumstances. Our present cat was rescued from a terrible hoarding situation, adopted out and returned a year later. By all accounts you would expect him to have behavior issues but he is the sweetest most loving cat so one never knows. I wish you the best of luck in making your decision. Please keep us posted and let us know what you decide to do.

 

[gilmargl]

I feel very sorry for you suffering from depression after the loss of your affectionate cat. I can appreciate that at the moment you are hoping that a new kitten will help to heal your pain and loneliness.
I may be able to help by telling you of my experience introducing a kitten to 2 older cats even though my reason for doing so was slightly different - it was purely selfish. With 2 not too affectionate females, I simply wanted a friendly male cat again. The fact that the male kitten was in fact female served me right for being selfish in the first place!

The kitten bonded fairly quickly with the older cat (7 years-old?) but not at all with the 3-year old. She liked to sleep with us but was never a lap cat. When the older cat died she became rather shy and hasn't bonded with any cat since. If you take on a cat or kitten, you will have to accept them as they are. There is no guarantee that a kitten will be affectionate and you cannot be sure how the kitten you choose will react to Aki or Aki to the kitten. So before you decide to accept a new kitten (or cat) be sure you are willing to tolerate a situation which does not quite come up to your hopes and expectations today.

I have fostered cats and kittens for the local shelter organisation. When my cat-room for fosters was occupied, or when the kitten in question was sick or badly injured and needed constant attention - I kept young kittens - first in an enclosure - in my living room where my own cats spent most of their time. These kittens were eventually rehomed but, until then, they were running around with my own older cats. I didn't have them long enough for them to make any real bonds but life was peaceful - the adult cats would leave the room if the kitten was too boisterous. And one, special, older kitten (also female) - who gave all my cats fleas - would have made a lovely, affectionate addition to my three. But, she found a permanent home and has bonded well with an older cat and a young baby.

So, there's no guarantee on how things will turn out. But, look after yourself first and, when you are back to health you'll be able to tackle anything your new kitten or cat brings into your (and Aki's) life. Unless you are reasonably fit, a new kitten may be just too much trouble and cause you more worry than you can take right now. Good luck.

 

[ygravel001]

Thank you all for your replies. I think I'll do what was suggested by some here as well by some loved ones and wait a bit. Maybe I'll make my choice before the holidays since I would be on vacation for a couple of weeks anyway.

Cheers