Question of the day, Sunday 22 December 2019

[Mia6]

Over the holidays, will you have to be around someone or more than one person who you really dislike? Someone who is always right, rude, tactless and just a nasty person. How do you handle it?

I will have to on Christmas Eve. I stay as far away from them as possible and count to ten when something asinine leaves their lips which is often. I never engage them in conversation. I've learned the hard way to just let it go.

What about you?

 

[Leomc123]

i was in this situation a few years back. Pretty much it was ignore them completely. The trick is if they come to talk to you, keep it short and sweet with them, and make up something to excuse yourself, like you need to go to the bathroom, or you are keeping an eye on the cooking, or you just remembered you need to make a phone call , or have a family member next to you to interrupt the conversation or pull you away when they are around you.

If they are rude to you, just smile at them and say "thats nice" and look at them directly in the eyes and keep smiling and stare at them. And dont respond with anything else and just wait for them to say something stupid again and smile at them. Soon they will get the idea and they will feel stupid and everyone around them will think they are stupid.

 

[verna davies]

Not nowadays, I used to have to grin and bear it but it is hard and others pick up on it. Now I avoid people I dislike or don't get on with. Too old to be tolerant. I appreciate that many people have to mix with company they would rather not and hats off to them for doing it.

 

[di and bob]

I am around some people who I dislike, but not something I can't handle. I really try to be tolerant in this season, but it's not something real easy, like said above, I'm too old to waste time on such people. People I really dislike I just don't associate with anymore. Life's too short. I usually ignore peole like that, or think of more pleasant things. I don't back down either if tehy start something and that is my problem. They haven't met a b#!*# until they've met me!

 

[Mia6]

They haven't met a b#!*# until they've met me!

Ha!!!!

 

[Maria Bayote]

One thing I don't like during this season especially when I used to spend Christmases in my home country - when I was forced to face relatives I only get to see once a year or occasionally such as during Christmas, a wedding or during a funeral. I do not like people who brag about where they went, house they acquired, or even signature clothes they bought for their kids. Once in a while I got to encounter nosy ones, and rude ones, so I look for an excuse for them to leave my house the soonest possible time, or look for the easiest way out. I have always not been a good people person especially to these kinds of people, and try to show my displeasure in my subtlest of ways.

 

[GaryT]

I simply try to avoid them. I am nice and will answer politely when they try to converse with me but, as soon as I see an opportunity, I exit stage left! Always nice to come home to my boy, Theodore. He greets me when I come home and makes me forget any bad dealings. Not many come to my house. I am always asked to come (and sometimes I find a reason to say no I can't come....my bad?)

 

[maggiedemi]

I try to stay away from people like that. It sends my anxiety through the roof to be around people who lecture me or don't let me have an opinion. My mom can't be avoided because she lives here. My oldest brother said to me the other day "Mom doesn't have a mean bone in her body." What a crock of crap. She is one of the meanest people I've ever known!

 

[Jem]

This year will be an interesting one....I'm not looking forward to it.
I have an aunt who we've all just tolerated. She likes to be a poop disturber, not happy unless there is drama and someone else is miserable with her. She's always been difficult, uses drugs, has illnesses, mental issues etc...BUT she's family, so whatever. She has significantly gotten worse over the last couple of years though and we have all stopped enabling her (no more money and favors). Anyway, since the money train has stopped she is even more...messed up and angry towards the family.
This past summer though she turned her sights on my Dad (the one man who always stood by her) and decided to threaten my father with the unthinkable, IF we, collectively as a family, don't start treating her better (note the last comment about no more money).
Well, my Dad being the softy that he is, still invited her to Christmas. I just hope this is one of those years she doesn't show up. She complains about not getting invited to events (lie - we invite her) then will turn around and say she doesn't like coming to things because she doesn't like that "we're all fake". I guess getting along with people means were fake...IDK.
I'm usually the take it in stride, ignore and let it go type, but I honestly don't trust myself this year. What she did, was....horrid, and to pretend like it didn't happen and make nice, I don't think I can do. If she shows up I'm going to try my best to ignore her, but if she confronts me......well, it takes A LOT to get me angry and not many people have seen my crazy mad side, but this might just be the year!

 

[LTS3]

Nope. I just don't deal with those type of people anymore and that includes family. I don't do family gatherings / holidays / etc anymore.

 

[neely]

The only problems I've encountered during the holidays were with some of the relatives on my husband's side of the family. However, as other members have said I would grit my teeth or ignore them. I felt it was not the time or place to bring up bad feelings or confront them during the holidays especially if we were at their home. On the other hand, I have been known to stand up for myself when they would over step their boundaries especially when it came to our children. Most of the instigators have passed on and the last few years we have spent the holidays at our neighbor's house. They also share our love for animals and we have a wonderful time, i.e. no need to ignore anyone there.

 

[betsygee]

Nope. I just don't deal with those type of people anymore and that includes family.

Same here.

We have a family gathering on Christmas Eve and there will be people there I don't have much in common with or disagree with on some things, but no one I actively dislike or feel I want to avoid.

 

[mightyboosh]

This thread emphasizes just how weird people are. I don't mean the posters above but we all seem to experience the same idiots at precisely the time when everything should be happy and harmonious. Why do they plague us with their presence?
Mine is a guy that I only see on Xmas day and none of us like him. He's a real smart ass and just not pleasant.
Maybe that's why characters like Scrooge et al were invented to show that redemption could be accomplished and that we can all live happily ever after. That's easier said than done though.
Mind you, they probably think the same way about us so who exactly is the bad guy?

 

[MonaLyssa33]

Since the election, my immediate family hasn't seen a lot of my extended family as a way to protect my nieces from their racism that really wasn't that evident until 2016. Anyway, it sounds like there will be a family party in January where I will be seeing some of the extended family I haven't seen, so it shall be interesting. I'm a pretty agreeable person though, so I get along with a lot of people, but I will go full-on Auntie Bear for my nieces if need be.

 

[Koveshnikov]

cats do not tolerate those who dislike them) let's do the same)

 

[Tik cat's mum]

No I'm to long in the tooth to put up with people I dislike now. I think it gets easier as you get older but when I was younger I just kept conversation short and sweet.

 

[mightyboosh]

No I'm to long in the tooth to put up with people I dislike now. I think it gets easier as you get older but when I was younger I just kept conversation short and sweet.

I agree. As I get older I find it easier to give people a taste of their own medicine.
We could always go on the 'Grumpy old men/Grumpy old women' TV series and let rip.

 

[Talien]

I'm too old to put up with that kind of crap, one of my Aunts is normally like that but acts all nice and polite to your face. It's probably a good thing that side of the family doesn't do get-togethers anymore. When I was younger I'd just shake my head and walk away, but now? No, sorry. Grow up. People like that I would pointedly ignore unless they purposely did things to get on my nerves. I'd tell them to knock it off and if they didn't take the hint I would turn the tables and provoke them into taking a swing at me, then call the police and report them for assault.

 

[CatLover49]

When Im around someone like that ...I just smile and be nice..say hello...And try not to get engaged in a conversation..if it does happen...I just try n be nice ..smile..let them voice their opinion and I just say YES...I understand...But in my opinion...IS. .So on etc..And Try and change up the subject in a slow but nice way...

 

[CatLover49]

Nope. I just don't deal with those type of people anymore and that includes family. I don't do family gatherings / holidays / etc anymore.

Sometimes its best that way