please help!

[pipkinlover87]

Working on finding him a home with a friend of my moms co worker.

Thanks all!

 

[pipkinlover87]

I don't know how to edit my original post but I meant to add I don't think he'd fare well being an outdoor cat. he's very comfy inside and has a stuffed animal that he drags around the house... and he's 7...

 

[tulosai]

Can you describe your new space? It is likeky we'd be able to help you figure out where to keep a literbox and how best to keep your daughter safe so he can stay with you indoors.

Can you also please tell us if he's ever scratched or been aggressive to the baby? If you think he'll scratched her because he scratched the furniture that is probably unfounded though as parents you will of course have to be vigilant as all parents with cats must be to make sure she learns to play with the cat respectfully and not do things like hit or pull on him that might make him try to get her off and scratch her in the process.

 

[stephakneexo]

There has to be a space for the litterbox

 

[mingking]

Please do not put down your cat. Your cat seems perfectly normal and the only problem is our own human fears and preferences. Please don't take what I said the wrong way. 

If the cat has not exhibited aggressive behaviour towards your daughter before, I wouldn't worry too much. Maybe show your daughter a safe way to pet or handle the cat. Of course, close supervision is what will ultimately ensure everyone is safe and happy. 

You can also try soft paws to help save your furniture. Sticky tape on furniture to discourage scratching. New types of scratching posts as cats often get bored with their old toys. 

 

[slykat12]

I honestly cannot believe what I am reading. The cat you chose to bring into your home is a living breathing being and you made a commitment that you can not just break. Putting a healthy cat down is not an option-that is murder plain and simple and no good vet will do it. In addition, no one is going to adopt a 7 year old. It will sit in a cage forever crying for you if you even find a no kill shelter that will take it.

The cat has done nothing wrong at all. It is your pet. Part of your family. You are suppossed to care for it till its natural death. That is your job. Create a space for the litter box. Think! Buy a piece of furniture that hides it. Put it in the bathroom. Tuck it in a corner. I had a litter box right in the kitchen and no one in my family batted an eye. Put it in a closet or in the kids room. If you clean it daily there is not an issue.

I second soft paws they work great. But you must keep the cat 100% indoors with softpaws on.

 

[detmut]

where do you live? what about trying to rehome him?

 

[pipkinlover87]

where do you live? what about trying to rehome him?

my mom is making some calls to friends and Co workers. Hopefully we can find someone!

 

[pipkinlover87]

Ok all, my mom is trying to find someone. i have also told a couple people to have them ask their friends, etc.

And yes, to answer everyone's questions He is not a nice cat. He has bitten and scratched my whole family and chases after the dogs even if they do nothing to provoke him. He was a feral cat when he was found and still has a wild side.

I will update if we hear anything about a new home for him.

 

[raficat]

I was going to suggest an enclosed litter box that can be in a main room without looking too unsightly, but it sounds like the cat just doesn't fit well into your family.

It's unlikely a nokill shelter would take him without a substantial donation. I used to work at one, and they only wanted adoptable cats - young and friendly. They only took older cats if there was money involved, or someone with good connections. And if you did get one to take him he would likely spend the rest of his life there.

If you take him to a county shelter they will almost certainly euthanize him within 24 hours - please don't.

Sometimes things don't work out. This is not your fault, nor is it the cats fault.

Do you live in or near a rural area? Sounds like he would be a good barn cat, since he isn't that into people. Maybe you can find a farm to take him?

Also, I want to say I had 3 cats aged 6 - 10 years when my daughter was born. There was never a problem. I taught her early on how to pet the kitty softly. So please don't think you can't have a cat with a baby in the house!

 

[pipkinlover87]

I was going to suggest an enclosed litter box that can be in a main room without looking too unsightly, but it sounds like the cat just doesn't fit well into your family.

It's unlikely a nokill shelter would take him without a substantial donation. I used to work at one, and they only wanted adoptable cats - young and friendly. They only took older cats if there was money involved, or someone with good connections. And if you did get one to take him he would likely spend the rest of his life there.

If you take him to a county shelter they will almost certainly euthanize him within 24 hours - please don't.

Sometimes things don't work out. This is not your fault, nor is it the cats fault.

Do you live in or near a rural area? Sounds like he would be a good barn cat, since he isn't that into people. Maybe you can find a farm to take him?

Also, I want to say I had 3 cats aged 6 - 10 years when my daughter was born. There was never a problem. I taught her early on how to pet the kitty softly. So please don't think you can't have a cat with a baby in the house!

Yes I definitely don't want him sitting in a cage for the rest of his life yes i live in a rural area and my sister in law is asking people she knows if they would want a barn cat or preferably an indoor cat.

I know one can have cats and babies at the same time. I was raised with cats and was taught how to pet them but my cat even if you pet him nicely and soft he's very unpredictable. I do not trust him with the baby at all. If I go in the other room real quick and the baby is playing on the ground I put the cat in the laundry room even if I'm just running to heat up a cup of tea or something.

It breaks my heart having to get rid of him but my daughter needs to be and is my number one priority. when my brother brought him home he was 3 weeks old and I was 18. I wasn't even thinking ahead to when I'd have children and have to deal with a mean cat biting one of them ya know?

Thank you for your kind words and advise. It means a lot to me

 

[mingking]

Yes I definitely don't want him sitting in a cage for the rest of his life yes i live in a rural area and my sister in law is asking people she knows if they would want a barn cat or preferably an indoor cat.

I know one can have cats and babies at the same time. I was raised with cats and was taught how to pet them but my cat even if you pet him nicely and soft he's very unpredictable. I do not trust him with the baby at all. If I go in the other room real quick and the baby is playing on the ground I put the cat in the laundry room even if I'm just running to heat up a cup of tea or something.

It breaks my heart having to get rid of him but my daughter needs to be and is my number one priority. when my brother brought him home he was 3 weeks old and I was 18. I wasn't even thinking ahead to when I'd have children and have to deal with a mean cat biting one of them ya know?

Thank you for your kind words and advise. It means a lot to me

I'm glad you're looking around for a home for him! I hope you do find one soon. For now, you could invest in some soft paws if you haven't already so scratching isn't as painful.

 

[pipkinlover87]

I'm glad you're looking around for a home for him! I hope you do find one soon. For now, you could invest in some soft paws if you haven't already so scratching isn't as painful.

I tried those a few years ago and he was NOT having any of that! I would have to have a vet do it so they could put him to sleep for the process haha for now she's not super mobile but she is trying to crawl and that's when I'm worried about it!

 

[raficat]

I hope you can find a more appropriate situation for him, and hope that some day you'll get another, nicer, cat!

 

[marmoset]

I'm not really sure how to respond to this.  You asked what we would do and that is a hard one to answer.  I would have worked with the cat to get it to stop scratching and biting people.  The more cats you work with the more you realize that they are not random whether they are feral or not.  Aggression is actually fairly predictable and is usually a reaction to some other stimulus unless the cat does genuinely have a chemical imbalance.  Misdirected aggression (where the cat is upset by some other animal or thing but attacks you or another, third animal) can also seem unpredictable (though it is certainly not random).  When I hear of a cat that bites and scratches I know that in most cases the people or other pets are crossing some line with the cat- making improper eye contact, overstimulating the cat, approaching the cat wrong.  It would be easier to know what is going on if you had been bitten today and could tell us everything that led up to the bite and what happened after the bite.  

As for furniture, cats do scratch.  Vets and groomers can apply soft paws pretty cheaply.  What kind of scratchers have you tried?  There are many materials (bare wood, cardboard, sisal rope, carpet etc) and some cats favor one over the others.  Cats also might prefer vertical scratchers or horizontal ones.  Unless you have tried a good assortment I wouldn't give up on scratchers.  My biggest peeve about scratching posts in general are the size. The cheaper ones are so short.  Cats want to stretch when they scratch (especially those that favor vertical posts) so longer/ taller is better.

As for what I'd do- I'd work to keep the cat.  My first move would be to call my vet because I have a good Doctor/ client relationship with her and she has helped me with behavioral issues with my cats.  She is the doctor that my shelter uses most of the time.  If she was away on some crazy long vacation I'd then call a cat- only vet (the other vet my shelter uses for more difficult cases) and see if they could consult on behavior.  Both of those options would definitely require an in-office visit and physical exam of the cat to rule out medical issues that might effect behavior.  If all else failed I'd ask for references for a cat behaviorist.  

No joking I would also watch all episodes of "My Cat from Hell."  Season two has a few cats that are aggressive and destructive and the owners are worried about bringing in a baby.  Most of all the seasons are available on youtube or you can buy them from amazon.  The earlier seasons focus more on how to do basic handling with cats (proper play techniques, how to pet without overstimulating, slow blinking, creating a good environment etc).  Then I'd read some of Pam Johnson-Bennet books on cat behavior.  

At this point I'd probably have the behavioral issues managed.  If not I'd go back to my vet and talk about medications for the cat.  I'm not a huge fan of handing out prozac like candy but if everything else failed and if the vet thought the cat could have an anxiety issue I'd put it on the meds.  

If even after all that I was unable to work it out with the cat I'd choose rehoming (indoor only) to someone I knew or had a good reference for- maybe a friend of a friend etc.  If I had no luck there I'd choose a good rescue or shelter as the most humane option.  You will have to do research on the shelters to find a no kill.  Some shelters let cats free-roam all or a part of the time.  If your cat bit someone at a no kill he'd have to be put into quarantine (in a cage) at the shelter for a certain number of days- I think it varies by state- but he wouldn't be put down or neglected/ abused.  Please believe me that bad shelters get more press than good shelters and no shelter wants to make itself look like a pet holiday resort that encourages people to guiltlessly relinquishing animals so they aren't making commercials showing a bunch of cats on a cat condo playing with a wand toy or a shelter volunteer giving some giant fluffball kisses.  Not all shelters are equal.  Many cats have very happy and long lives at no-kill shelters.  The biggest issue with a no-kill shelter/ rescue route is that it can be hard to get a cat in, especially this time of year when there is an inundation of kittens.    Your best bet might be a rescue that functions largely through foster homes or a no-kill shelter that uses foster homes.  Plenty of fosterers are willing to take cats that need some socialization.  

I wouldn't put the cat down no matter what.  

Now here's some random thoughts and questions:

Have you researched how to move with a cat and establish a safe room?  If he's had issues in the past a move will likely be stressful for him and he may be more prone to aggression.  

Where are these dogs that he has attacked?  Are they your dogs or friends' dogs that were visiting?

Is he neutered?

When he bites does he break skin?  When was the last time anyone was attacked?

Can you pet him or pick him up?

What does he do when company comes over?  It seems he does not hide because you said he's bitten/ scratched everyone in the family.  If he is not hiding where is he and where is the company?

 

[Norachan]

I have a house full of feral cats, some of them tolerate petting more than others but none of them has ever bitten or scratched me. If he's reacting like this it's because he feels threatened. I think he'd feel a lot more secure if he could get out of you and your daughter's way.

What he needs is his own space. I think the best thing to do would be to make him his own Kitty Highway, some shelving, cat trees and walkways so that he can get all around the house without having to come down to floor level. If he's got a safe place he can run to and hide he's not going to resort to biting and scratching.

There are some amazing examples of Kitty Highways on youtube, they can be as elaborate or simple as you like. I recommend you take a look at some of them and talk to your husband about what would work in your new place. We put ours up in an afternoon and the cats love it. it's made all of them a lot happier.

Please, please don't put his down or turn him over to a shelter. He's your family just as much as your daughter is.

 

[pipkinlover87]

I have a house full of feral cats, some of them tolerate petting more than others but none of them has ever bitten or scratched me. If he's reacting like this it's because he feels threatened. I think he'd feel a lot more secure if he could get out of you and your daughter's way.

What he needs is his own space. I think the best thing to do would be to make him his own Kitty Highway, some shelving, cat trees and walkways so that he can get all around the house without having to come down to floor level. If he's got a safe place he can run to and hide he's not going to resort to biting and scratching.

There are some amazing examples of Kitty Highways on youtube, they can be as elaborate or simple as you like. I recommend you take a look at some of them and talk to your husband about what would work in your new place. We put ours up in an afternoon and the cats love it. it's made all of them a lot happier.

Please, please don't put his down or turn him over to a shelter. He's your family just as much as your daughter is.

Thanks, I'll check them out!

 

[pipkinlover87]

I'm not really sure how to respond to this.  You asked what we would do and that is a hard one to answer.  I would have worked with the cat to get it to stop scratching and biting people.  The more cats you work with the more you realize that they are not random whether they are feral or not.  Aggression is actually fairly predictable and is usually a reaction to some other stimulus unless the cat does genuinely have a chemical imbalance.  Misdirected aggression (where the cat is upset by some other animal or thing but attacks you or another, third animal) can also seem unpredictable (though it is certainly not random).  When I hear of a cat that bites and scratches I know that in most cases the people or other pets are crossing some line with the cat- making improper eye contact, overstimulating the cat, approaching the cat wrong.  It would be easier to know what is going on if you had been bitten today and could tell us everything that led up to the bite and what happened after the bite.  

As for furniture, cats do scratch.  Vets and groomers can apply soft paws pretty cheaply.  What kind of scratchers have you tried?  There are many materials (bare wood, cardboard, sisal rope, carpet etc) and some cats favor one over the others.  Cats also might prefer vertical scratchers or horizontal ones.  Unless you have tried a good assortment I wouldn't give up on scratchers.  My biggest peeve about scratching posts in general are the size. The cheaper ones are so short.  Cats want to stretch when they scratch (especially those that favor vertical posts) so longer/ taller is better.

As for what I'd do- I'd work to keep the cat.  My first move would be to call my vet because I have a good Doctor/ client relationship with her and she has helped me with behavioral issues with my cats.  She is the doctor that my shelter uses most of the time.  If she was away on some crazy long vacation I'd then call a cat- only vet (the other vet my shelter uses for more difficult cases) and see if they could consult on behavior.  Both of those options would definitely require an in-office visit and physical exam of the cat to rule out medical issues that might effect behavior.  If all else failed I'd ask for references for a cat behaviorist.  

No joking I would also watch all episodes of "My Cat from Hell."  Season two has a few cats that are aggressive and destructive and the owners are worried about bringing in a baby.  Most of all the seasons are available on youtube or you can buy them from amazon.  The earlier seasons focus more on how to do basic handling with cats (proper play techniques, how to pet without overstimulating, slow blinking, creating a good environment etc).  Then I'd read some of Pam Johnson-Bennet books on cat behavior.  

At this point I'd probably have the behavioral issues managed.  If not I'd go back to my vet and talk about medications for the cat.  I'm not a huge fan of handing out prozac like candy but if everything else failed and if the vet thought the cat could have an anxiety issue I'd put it on the meds.  

If even after all that I was unable to work it out with the cat I'd choose rehoming (indoor only) to someone I knew or had a good reference for- maybe a friend of a friend etc.  If I had no luck there I'd choose a good rescue or shelter as the most humane option.  You will have to do research on the shelters to find a no kill.  Some shelters let cats free-roam all or a part of the time.  If your cat bit someone at a no kill he'd have to be put into quarantine (in a cage) at the shelter for a certain number of days- I think it varies by state- but he wouldn't be put down or neglected/ abused.  Please believe me that bad shelters get more press than good shelters and no shelter wants to make itself look like a pet holiday resort that encourages people to guiltlessly relinquishing animals so they aren't making commercials showing a bunch of cats on a cat condo playing with a wand toy or a shelter volunteer giving some giant fluffball kisses.  Not all shelters are equal.  Many cats have very happy and long lives at no-kill shelters.  The biggest issue with a no-kill shelter/ rescue route is that it can be hard to get a cat in, especially this time of year when there is an inundation of kittens.    Your best bet might be a rescue that functions largely through foster homes or a no-kill shelter that uses foster homes.  Plenty of fosterers are willing to take cats that need some socialization.  

I wouldn't put the cat down no matter what.  

Now here's some random thoughts and questions:

Have you researched how to move with a cat and establish a safe room?  If he's had issues in the past a move will likely be stressful for him and he may be more prone to aggression.  
Where are these dogs that he has attacked?  Are they your dogs or friends' dogs that were visiting?
Is he neutered?
When he bites does he break skin?  When was the last time anyone was attacked?
Can you pet him or pick him up?
What does he do when company comes over?  It seems he does not hide because you said he's bitten/ scratched everyone in the family.  If he is not hiding where is he and where is the company?

•Have you researched how to move with a cat and establish a safe room? If he's had issues in the past a move will likely be stressful for him and he may be more prone to aggression.
~yes, I have moved with him before and he did great. We set his room up first so he could stay away from any commotion that was going on.

•Where are these dogs that he has attacked? Are they your dogs or friends' dogs that were visiting?
~one of them is my dog who has been with us for 4 years. Often times he just walks by my cat to get to me when I call him. He has jumped over the couch before to avoid walking by my cat. Also my parents dogs. He grew up with 2 out of 3 of them. Again, they will just be laying there or walk by not paying any attention to my cat and he will run after them or swipe at them. They avoid him as well and if we call them into the room we're in and they have to walk by the cat they will stop and stare at us as if we're crazy.

•Is he neutered?
~yes, has been since he was a kitten and allowed to be.

•When he bites does he break skin?
~usually he does. I've had to use a bandaid before.

•When was the last time anyone was attacked?
~he got my dog (lab/newf mix) a few days ago and last weekend he scratched my brother when he was just standing near him not paying attention to him.

•Can you pet him or pick him up?
~I can and he will tolerate my husband petting him a couple times. Everyone else is too afraid to pick him up but my husband has several times. I can pick him up typically with no problem.

•What does he do when company comes over? It seems he does not hide because you said he's bitten/ scratched everyone in the family. If he is not hiding where is he and where is the company?
~no he does not hide. He will lay on the back of the couch looking pissed at everyone. He has his own room to go to but never does. My friends and family ignore him because they know he can mean.

 

[gesseppe]

Catnip like marijuana, when taken only amplifies the current emotion... But when I have a kitty acting up I sprinkle some of the scent over their bedding.  They seem to act out and most of the time get their much needed time out and everything is good for awhile..  Maybe some catnip scent on your kitties scratching post... he can let some aggression out on that!  

My baby Jennifer will go off on you if you touch her tummy, this was from a mean vet who hurt her when she got fixed...  anyways she is scarred and mostly scared.  It is what it is, Maybe much needed one on one play time with thick leather work gloves that go up the forearm.. no seriously, I have a Tomcat that plays bloody rough and no one else can play with him but me...  and feeding catnip is not recommended it can cause other problems.. 

etsy- FEB. 16 086 sml.jpg

• gesseppe
• Apr 9, 2015

good luck

 

[marmoset]

•Have you researched how to move with a cat and establish a safe room? If he's had issues in the past a move will likely be stressful for him and he may be more prone to aggression.
~yes, I have moved with him before and he did great. We set his room up first so he could stay away from any commotion that was going on.

•Where are these dogs that he has attacked? Are they your dogs or friends' dogs that were visiting?
~one of them is my dog who has been with us for 4 years. Often times he just walks by my cat to get to me when I call him. He has jumped over the couch before to avoid walking by my cat. Also my parents dogs. He grew up with 2 out of 3 of them. Again, they will just be laying there or walk by not paying any attention to my cat and he will run after them or swipe at them. They avoid him as well and if we call them into the room we're in and they have to walk by the cat they will stop and stare at us as if we're crazy.

•Is he neutered?
~yes, has been since he was a kitten and allowed to be.

•When he bites does he break skin?
~usually he does. I've had to use a bandaid before.

•When was the last time anyone was attacked?
~he got my dog (lab/newf mix) a few days ago and last weekend he scratched my brother when he was just standing near him not paying attention to him.

•Can you pet him or pick him up?
~I can and he will tolerate my husband petting him a couple times. Everyone else is too afraid to pick him up but my husband has several times. I can pick him up typically with no problem.

•What does he do when company comes over? It seems he does not hide because you said he's bitten/ scratched everyone in the family. If he is not hiding where is he and where is the company?
~no he does not hide. He will lay on the back of the couch looking pissed at everyone. He has his own room to go to but never does. My friends and family ignore him because they know he can mean.

That's incredibly valuable info.  He's not hiding when company comes but he is anxious over his territory or he feels threatened.  I think you absolutely should follow pipkinlover87's advice about creating a path up high where he can walk without feeling threatened by anyone or any dog and call your vet to inquire about medications- he might actually be imbalanced and do well.  Please give "My Cat from Hell" a chance too.  He's had a lot of cats that sound like yours on the show.