New cat attacked my son! Need help!

[luv2cats]

Working at a shelter I've seen cats with all kinds of issues.  This cat may not like children and needs to be in an adult home.  If the cat is attacking your son this may not be the right fit for your household.  Kids are kids and of course want to play with the cat.  The first thing you should do is contact the Shelter where you adopted from, if it is a good one they will help you and take back the cat and letting you adopt another more friendly family cat.  Shelter's should know the cat's ability/personality to either be in an adult home, no other pets, not small children, etc.

 I agree with the one poster that many people might not like my opinion on this issue, but it is one thing for adults to work with a new cat with issues, but if you cannot trust the cat to be around your son then it should not be in your home.  Some animals do not like children and won't ever like children - for the safety of your son you need to take this cat back to the shelter as fast as you can before any injury to your son happens.

 

[quiet]

I think she said the shelter is in another state so returning is not an option. If she relinquishes the cat to a shelter now with the history they will euthanize the cat. Just making sure we are being realistic here.

 

[mycatwasthebest]

@mycatwasthebest Hardly, since the behavior stopped once each child reached puberty - the cat was 5 years old when our nephew did, and 9 when our niece did.

Without actually seeing the interaction between the OP's son and cat, it's difficult to say whether the cat is aggressive, playful, fearful or any combination thereof.

Yes it is hard to say, that's why I think they should be allowed to interact together without being separated unless it is truly out of hand. If your niece and nephew weren't living with you I can see being  unable to train the cat re their presence, but that should be doable here. Maybe just take it real slow like introducing cats to each other?

 

[mycatwasthebest]

EUREKA! CLAW COVERS! they are plastic(?) tips that cover the claws so scratching doesn't hurt!!! they are supposed to last for about 6 weeks...a small investment that I can't see any harm in

 

[jcat]

EUREKA! CLAW COVERS! they are plastic(?) tips that cover the claws so scratching doesn't hurt!!! they are supposed to last for about 6 weeks...a small investment that I can't see any harm in

Great suggestion!

The site info is here: Soft Claws , Soft Paws

There are also some reviews by TCS members: Awesome, Works very well to stop furniture clawing, Excellent alternative to tattered furniture!

[VIDEO][/VIDEO]


[VIDEO][/VIDEO]

 

[quiet]

So, although I think the soft paws are great for some situations, I don't know if they are right for this one.

We have a cat here that has been newly adopted and also relocated so is under a bit of stress. I think that doing the soft paws could push this cat over the limit.

Just my opinion. I actually think it would be better to isolate the cat for the next two weeks than to cause any more stress. She needs to feel safe for a while and I think that soft paws will not help her feel safe. Also I have seen cats start biting when they don't have their claws for defense. Not in every situation. \

Anyway, Please let us know how things are going with your cat and son.

 

[mycatwasthebest]

cats do not know they cannot use their  claws as usual with these

THAT IS THE "POINT"

 

[newkittyperson]

Hi again,

I'm soooo glad I found this site! Thank you everyone for your advice and suggestions. I read them all and have found great ideas and tips from the 'collective' of cat owners here.

Our kitty is still with us, as we struggle with the newness of having a cat in residence AND her aggression/fear issues. Right now the attacker (aka: Mocha) is curled up purring in my lap. She snuggled up after her routine of climbing up on my lap, standing on me to reach my neck and lick and lick...rubbing her head into my neck and chin (whats up with that???). She can be a real cuddle monster when she chooses to be!

I am thrilled to report there has not been another attack of my son (fingers crossed - touch wood).

We have kept him off the floor (unless we are with him), been getting him to feed her, and have kept a 'hands off/no touch" policy in place while she gets used to the fact she's come into a home with a 10-year old child who moves, makes some noise and so forth.

Our kitty, Mocha, is very wary of him still and rushes towards his direction is he makes noises (he's a 10 year-old boy, he makes noises!) and watches him VERY closely, taking an aggressive stance or position if he is nearby. He had his first friend over in weeks just yesterday and needless to say, we watched the cat like a hawk to keep both boys safe (I actually took her into the bedroom and hung out with her).

To compound the issue, the former stray cat, who convinced us to adopt our own cat, has returned to our covered porch! She has an owner, but seems to prefer our home. Although the two are completely separated, I suspect Mocha senses the stray-not-stray is nearby!

We have not given up yet, and will be using as many tricks and tips presented here to keep working on the aggression! That said, I cannot keep asking my son to cancel play dates at our home, or to be "on guard" 24/7, or even stay quiet and still and calm for the most part in his own home!

I guess time will tell if this is going to work out or not! But we cannot take her back to the shelter we adopted from so easily, as it is across the country!

So, please keep tips and tricks coming...they are helpful - even if just for support!

You guys are great! Thank you for reaching out...

 

[rachelinaz]

Since you don't know his past.... My thought is maybe a boy his age in his former home abused him...
So maybe he/she relates boys that are 10ish to mean little brats.
NOT THAT YOUR SON IS MEAN! But relates kids that are that age to bullies.
***We are almost positive that is what happened to our dog Louie. Three years later and we still issues.

Well this is very sad and you should discuss this problem with a vet. The only way to save this from happening again is that you should never leave her alone with your boy.   Discuss safe behavior with your children and teach him how to defend against cat attacks. Your boy is now grownup as he is 10, not so small to defend himself against a cat attack. Aggression in cats can be caused by fear, pain, over-stimulation (petting or play) or is redirected annoyance and frustration induced, for example, by the cat observing a strange neighborhood cat trespassing on its territory through a closed window. A child yanking repeatedly on a cat’s tail would qualify in the plain old annoyance category.

 

[furmonster mom]

I would have to agree with the suggestion of giving her a high perch.

Think about it this way, what do cats do to escape a perceived danger?  They climb a tree.  This is a natural "safety" instinct; many animals have a similar instinct. 

Your son may not be a true danger, but the cat perceives him as one none the less.  Not by anyone's fault, it may just be a past experience.  Giving her a place where she can feel safe to observe may actually give her another perspective on him and his movements.  Eventually, and it may take time, she may realize that he is not as much of a threat as she thought.

Oh... and the headbutting, cheek marking, and grooming are really good signs that she likes you. 

 

 

[datagrrl]

We had a dog we got at a year and a half. He was a complete sissy. Submissive in every way. Unless you were a bald white guy. Then he became aggressive. It took him years to accept my husband's best friend. It wasn't just him. We had him for 15 years and if he met someone new who was bald it was always the same thing.

 

[the3rdname]

I am thrilled to report there has not been another attack of my son (fingers crossed - touch wood).

We have kept him off the floor (unless we are with him), been getting him to feed her, and have kept a 'hands off/no touch" policy in place while she gets used to the fact she's come into a home with a 10-year old child who moves, makes some noise and so forth.


We have not given up yet, and will be using as many tricks and tips presented here to keep working on the aggression! That said, I cannot keep asking my son to cancel play dates at our home, or to be "on guard" 24/7, or even stay quiet and still and calm for the most part in his own home!

Good job on taking all necessary precautions and getting your son to feed her 

  I'm so glad the attacks have ceased.  As soon as she seems more comfortable with your son, I would get him to play with her using wand toys.

I honestly don't think your son will need to modify his behavior or skip playdates at your home for very long.  Granted they're younger than your Mocha, but my feral kittens used to run for cover when I cleared my throat.  That was two weeks ago.  Now I can talk normally, move normally (almost), and even laugh without freaking them out.  (I just brought them indoors, so I'll probably have to regress a little until everyone starts to relax again.  Oh well!)  Look at it this way: your son has to practice self-control and behavior modification several hours a day, 180 days a year.  If he can control himself for long stretches of time out of his young life in a classroom, he can do it at home.  You set the bar and your kids will live up to your expectations.  Besides!  Now that summer is here, there's ample opportunity to run around screaming like a mad man *outdoors*.

People keep mentioning high perches and it occurred to me that you don't necessarily have to purchase a cat tree to provide safety zones for Mocha.  Get some cheap shelves at Ikea and glue pieces of carpet remnant to them, attach to the wall in a staggered pattern to allow for little jumps up and down.  There are probably a thousand DIY tutorials online.

Best wishes and please update!

 

[quiet]

Can't you lock her in a bedroom with litter and food and water when your son has play dates?