- Joined
- Mar 11, 2018
- Messages
- 17
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Hey folks. I've posted on here a couple times before regarding my kitty's health but in the last couple weeks it's become clear that there's not much else we can do and I will just be watching my baby waste away.
The quick rundown is Lita is a 16 yo CKD/IBD kitty. She's been treated for CKD for about 5 years, the IBD not quite as long but it has likely developed into cancer. I am opting not to put her through the ultrasounds/surgery/etc necessary for diagnosing and treating the cancer as I don't believe her frail little body can handle it and she's already been through so much (had mammary tumor removed two years ago).
She's on anti-nausea meds, appetite stimulants and steroids but we cannot get her the slightest bit interested in food. She is being syringe fed but still can't seem to keep the weight on. She's wasting away and it's so hard to watch. She has been to two vets and both admitted that short of surgery there's not much else that can be done.
Friday I had a hospice vet come out and do a quality of life assessment on her. She ranked just above the threshold for euthanasia, but after taking a look at her the vet said it was only going to get worse from here, and sooner would be better than later. I scheduled *tentative* appointment for an at-home euthanasia for Monday and took the long weekend to be with her.
But now as she's cuddled up on my lap and I'm sobbing, I don't know if I can do it. She still wants to be around us a fair portion of the time and does not seem to be in acute pain (vet agreed on this). However, as I mentioned, she does not eat and now doesn't even drink (just dips her nose in the water or hangs her head over it) and her motor skills are deteriorating rapidly. She also looks uncomfortable a lot of time, sitting in the 'meatloaf' position with her head down.
Overall I feel it may be too soon to end her life, but I am also desperately afraid she will die alone while I'm at work or end up injuring herself by trying to jump up on something or etc while I'm not around.
I can't figure out if it's more selfish to end her life due to these concerns or to keep her around in spite of them. I've been analyzing my feelings all day and I just don't know which are coming from a genuine concern for her wellbeing, from my guilt/fear, or from my exhaustion if watching her decline.
Please, any help is greatly appreciated. I know every person and cat is different but I just feel like I can't work this out on my own and my partner is deferring to me since she is my cat. And of course other people don't really understand...
The quick rundown is Lita is a 16 yo CKD/IBD kitty. She's been treated for CKD for about 5 years, the IBD not quite as long but it has likely developed into cancer. I am opting not to put her through the ultrasounds/surgery/etc necessary for diagnosing and treating the cancer as I don't believe her frail little body can handle it and she's already been through so much (had mammary tumor removed two years ago).
She's on anti-nausea meds, appetite stimulants and steroids but we cannot get her the slightest bit interested in food. She is being syringe fed but still can't seem to keep the weight on. She's wasting away and it's so hard to watch. She has been to two vets and both admitted that short of surgery there's not much else that can be done.
Friday I had a hospice vet come out and do a quality of life assessment on her. She ranked just above the threshold for euthanasia, but after taking a look at her the vet said it was only going to get worse from here, and sooner would be better than later. I scheduled *tentative* appointment for an at-home euthanasia for Monday and took the long weekend to be with her.
But now as she's cuddled up on my lap and I'm sobbing, I don't know if I can do it. She still wants to be around us a fair portion of the time and does not seem to be in acute pain (vet agreed on this). However, as I mentioned, she does not eat and now doesn't even drink (just dips her nose in the water or hangs her head over it) and her motor skills are deteriorating rapidly. She also looks uncomfortable a lot of time, sitting in the 'meatloaf' position with her head down.
Overall I feel it may be too soon to end her life, but I am also desperately afraid she will die alone while I'm at work or end up injuring herself by trying to jump up on something or etc while I'm not around.
I can't figure out if it's more selfish to end her life due to these concerns or to keep her around in spite of them. I've been analyzing my feelings all day and I just don't know which are coming from a genuine concern for her wellbeing, from my guilt/fear, or from my exhaustion if watching her decline.
Please, any help is greatly appreciated. I know every person and cat is different but I just feel like I can't work this out on my own and my partner is deferring to me since she is my cat. And of course other people don't really understand...