Hey guys, hope this doesn't ramble on too much.
My mom - 53yrs young, has never owned a cat, and she lives alone. She got divorced about 10 years ago or so, and sometimes I think she is lonely. She sometimes comes over and takes care of my cats when I am out of town, and seemed to enjoy having them around. So, I suggested that maybe she consider getting a cat. I told her I would adopt a kitten for her on mothers day. She found one she liked through adopt-a-pet online, and they tried to make her take two kitties because she works full-time. She felt like it was too much for her to handle, and the idea sort of fizzled out. HOWEVER between then and now, she's was always browsing the AAP website and would email me kitties that she liked...so I was under the impression she was still interested in a kitten.
WELL, last Friday, my friend called, asked how my mom was doing, and I told her fine, she's been thinking about getting a kitten. Turns out my friend had a stray kitten that her mom found while driving back from Kentucky on the Hwy - in KY that is....well anyways, she brought the little sweetie over, and my mom met him, and decided to take him home. We went to the pet store that night, and I helped her get some things. My mom is VERY NEW to Cats and I gave her some direction on how to care for them and what to do. I even got her a book, emailed her a ton of links, and directed her to here, TCS, which I am not sure if she's even visited or not. I know she loves the little guy, he is just so sweet! He is about 5.5-6 weeks old. Here's a couple photos of him:
Ok so Sat. I went over to her house and gave the little kitty a bath....I saw one flea crawling on his head, and I couldn't get it off...I have never had any experience w/ fleas - and have never had a flea problem w/ my two cats and one dog...needless to say, now I have all my pets on flea prevention and I HOPE I do not end up w/ a flea problem!!!
So Mon. she brought him to the vet for his first checkup, a flea wrap of sorts, and you know the typical thing...de-worming and stuff...they educated her about the fleas, and I don't think she's too happy about that, or the $165 vet bill. She's not rich, and sometimes finances can be hard for her. But I DO KNOW she CAN afford to take care of a cat, she just needs to realize that once this initial round of vaccinations and care are over with, that it gets much better....
So anyways, this kitty has really turned my moms life around...she isn't used to change, and having to de-flea, have a stinky cat box, worry about the extra expenses (as we didn't get him from adoption, just through a friend), and the stress of having a kitten, cat proofing and moving things around in her house has got her totally stressed out. She keeps going back and forth on whether she wants to keep him, or give him away. She has a good friend of hers who's sister was looking to adopt a kitten, so at least we know that we can give the kitten a good home should my mom decide that having a cat isn't for her.
She's called me twice - both late at night just needing to talk and telling me she just isn't sure she can handle a cat in her life....she says he's cute, and loves spending time with him, but she feels disrupted and out of whack. She complains that he gets into everything, he's a little stinky, he's costing her a lot of $, she has the heebie jeebies from the fleas...you know what i mean....I feel so bad..>I love this little kitty i've fallen in love w/ his sweetness....and I'm trying to help my mom understand that kittens are not kittens forever, the fleas and worms will be gone, and he'll get bigger, and not get into things as much, and as long as she trains him right, and treats him good (as of course she IS doing a great job for him), that things WILL GET BETTER! That you bond and form a special relationship that you just can't explain because it is a feeling. She told me that sometimes she looks into the kittens eyes and gets a little creeped out...lol i told her thats normal, cats have a way about them somtimes but I said she shouldn't worry about that.
I want to send her to this post so she can read the responses, in hopes it will help her try a little longer. I honestly feel like she never gives things enough time and seems to give up too soon on things.....but I don't know! If she is having these feelings, would it be better for her to just give him up, or should she try for longer, and if so, how long?
Is there anyone on here that was once new to cats, and never thought they would be a cat OR PET person, feeling disrupted like she does, and had gotten a kitten older in life, who had doubts about it once the kitten was there? Did you stick it out? Give it up? I'd love to hear what you guys think, and how I can give my mom advice. I feel bad but I keep trying to make her feel guilty if she gets rid of him because i totally want her to keep him, at the same time, I don't want her to resent him(or me! lol), or regret getting him - esp. when he's not a little kitten anymore and she feels like cats are just not for her in general. I wish I could reassure her that they become your best buddies, and its a wonderful feeling to be a cat owner...i know it isn't for everyone, but I just wish she would give him more time....your thoughts are greatly appreciated!
Thanks for the replies, and thanks for getting through this post!
My mom - 53yrs young, has never owned a cat, and she lives alone. She got divorced about 10 years ago or so, and sometimes I think she is lonely. She sometimes comes over and takes care of my cats when I am out of town, and seemed to enjoy having them around. So, I suggested that maybe she consider getting a cat. I told her I would adopt a kitten for her on mothers day. She found one she liked through adopt-a-pet online, and they tried to make her take two kitties because she works full-time. She felt like it was too much for her to handle, and the idea sort of fizzled out. HOWEVER between then and now, she's was always browsing the AAP website and would email me kitties that she liked...so I was under the impression she was still interested in a kitten.
WELL, last Friday, my friend called, asked how my mom was doing, and I told her fine, she's been thinking about getting a kitten. Turns out my friend had a stray kitten that her mom found while driving back from Kentucky on the Hwy - in KY that is....well anyways, she brought the little sweetie over, and my mom met him, and decided to take him home. We went to the pet store that night, and I helped her get some things. My mom is VERY NEW to Cats and I gave her some direction on how to care for them and what to do. I even got her a book, emailed her a ton of links, and directed her to here, TCS, which I am not sure if she's even visited or not. I know she loves the little guy, he is just so sweet! He is about 5.5-6 weeks old. Here's a couple photos of him:
Ok so Sat. I went over to her house and gave the little kitty a bath....I saw one flea crawling on his head, and I couldn't get it off...I have never had any experience w/ fleas - and have never had a flea problem w/ my two cats and one dog...needless to say, now I have all my pets on flea prevention and I HOPE I do not end up w/ a flea problem!!!
So Mon. she brought him to the vet for his first checkup, a flea wrap of sorts, and you know the typical thing...de-worming and stuff...they educated her about the fleas, and I don't think she's too happy about that, or the $165 vet bill. She's not rich, and sometimes finances can be hard for her. But I DO KNOW she CAN afford to take care of a cat, she just needs to realize that once this initial round of vaccinations and care are over with, that it gets much better....
So anyways, this kitty has really turned my moms life around...she isn't used to change, and having to de-flea, have a stinky cat box, worry about the extra expenses (as we didn't get him from adoption, just through a friend), and the stress of having a kitten, cat proofing and moving things around in her house has got her totally stressed out. She keeps going back and forth on whether she wants to keep him, or give him away. She has a good friend of hers who's sister was looking to adopt a kitten, so at least we know that we can give the kitten a good home should my mom decide that having a cat isn't for her.
She's called me twice - both late at night just needing to talk and telling me she just isn't sure she can handle a cat in her life....she says he's cute, and loves spending time with him, but she feels disrupted and out of whack. She complains that he gets into everything, he's a little stinky, he's costing her a lot of $, she has the heebie jeebies from the fleas...you know what i mean....I feel so bad..>I love this little kitty i've fallen in love w/ his sweetness....and I'm trying to help my mom understand that kittens are not kittens forever, the fleas and worms will be gone, and he'll get bigger, and not get into things as much, and as long as she trains him right, and treats him good (as of course she IS doing a great job for him), that things WILL GET BETTER! That you bond and form a special relationship that you just can't explain because it is a feeling. She told me that sometimes she looks into the kittens eyes and gets a little creeped out...lol i told her thats normal, cats have a way about them somtimes but I said she shouldn't worry about that.
I want to send her to this post so she can read the responses, in hopes it will help her try a little longer. I honestly feel like she never gives things enough time and seems to give up too soon on things.....but I don't know! If she is having these feelings, would it be better for her to just give him up, or should she try for longer, and if so, how long?
Is there anyone on here that was once new to cats, and never thought they would be a cat OR PET person, feeling disrupted like she does, and had gotten a kitten older in life, who had doubts about it once the kitten was there? Did you stick it out? Give it up? I'd love to hear what you guys think, and how I can give my mom advice. I feel bad but I keep trying to make her feel guilty if she gets rid of him because i totally want her to keep him, at the same time, I don't want her to resent him(or me! lol), or regret getting him - esp. when he's not a little kitten anymore and she feels like cats are just not for her in general. I wish I could reassure her that they become your best buddies, and its a wonderful feeling to be a cat owner...i know it isn't for everyone, but I just wish she would give him more time....your thoughts are greatly appreciated!
Thanks for the replies, and thanks for getting through this post!