male cats not getting along

[jc66]

Hello,

My two male cats are neutered, both kinda healthy. The new cat just adopted, is Tux, he came from a cat cafe. He's used to new cats, shy, but here he's made himself at home. His only health problem is a problem with his gums so he needs all 4 back teeth pulled.
Our resident cat Bear, is a maine coon, he has Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy, high blood pressure, and anxiety. He's on meds and doing well, although the anxiety meds were just started yesterday, Prozac.
Bear can be quite aggressive with my cat in particular, since the first day they met. He was 6 months old, she was 4 years. The other females he corners, sometimes with his ears back, or he chases until they are huddled on the ground screaming. They don't fight but they scream. His ears are back, tail whipping wildly, and when you intervene he very slowly walks away giving them a side eye, but this only happens maybe twice a year. However, with my cat, it's whenever he sees her, and part of it is her reaction to him.
We lost my other cat in March, and I mentioned I was thinking of adopting, my dad immediately adopted Tux.
Tux pretty much ignores everyone, only going on the defensive when something happens. Bear however, is on the offensive. I tried to do slow introductions, but my dad ruined it, immediately taking Tux out of his room and letting him loose saying cats fight, they'll work it out, no matter how many things I show him otherwise.
Tux loves exploring the house and Bear usually follows in a slightly crouched slow chase. If Tux's back is turned, Bear begins to Trott and tries to attack, I usually intervene. However, sometimes when Bear goes after Tux, his tail is wildly flicking, pupils dilated, and ears straight up, whiskers front as well. He also growls and yowls, and if you try to physically remove him, he tries to bite, which is rare.
Tux, has learned to jump over the multiple pet gates in the room and open the door. We have something rigged to keep him in at night, but he cries all night.
When Bear starts in on Tux, I try to distract him, there's a 50/50 chance it works. When he looks away at me or walks away, I praise him. When he doesn't I just keep on trying.
Is there anyway to help them get along even though my dad tries to ruin it?
P.S. I'm going to try and attach videos, Bear is the brown and white one.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Hi. I guess the first big question is how this all is affecting Tux. Does he cower and/or stay away from Bear, or does he just let these 'skirmishes' have little impact on him? If the former, you have got to point that out to your dad, saying it can have long term effects on Tux's personally and behavior. If the latter, then, it might solve itself over time, along with your current approach, especially if the Prozac helps Bear.

Given you have issues between Bear and one of the females as well, you had better hope the Prozac helps. Your female may be suffering otherwise, although you don't seem to be worried about that relationship.

Short of a proper introduction, about the next best thing you can do is to start a 'discipline' technique with Bear, once he starts the attack process if you can't stop him with your current approach, then you pick up him say a firm 'no' or hiss in his face (pick one and stick with it), and then place him in a 'time-out' behind a closed door for no more than a couple of minutes. The only way this will eventually work is to do it each and every time - consistency is the key here.

Here are some TCS articles, in case you can find them useful.
How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction – TheCatSite Articles
How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles
Cat Behavior Problems [What to do and what not to do] – TheCatSite Articles

 

[Furballsmom]

When he doesn't I just keep on trying.

Bless you, although be careful for yourself.
How To Safely Break Up A Cat Fight – TheCatSite Articles

We have something rigged to keep him in at night, but he cries all night.

If you have a clock that audibly ticks, or maybe set your cellphone up to do this, the ticking sound (or a heartbeat sound) can sometimes help calm cats even adult ones.

 

[jc66]

Hi. I guess the first big question is how this all is affecting Tux. Does he cower and/or stay away from Bear, or does he just let these 'skirmishes' have little impact on him? If the former, you have got to point that out to your dad, saying it can have long term effects on Tux's personally and behavior. If the latter, then, it might solve itself over time, along with your current approach, especially if the Prozac helps Bear.

Given you have issues between Bear and one of the females as well, you had better hope the Prozac helps. Your female may be suffering otherwise, although you don't seem to be worried about that relationship.

Short of a proper introduction, about the next best thing you can do is to start a 'discipline' technique with Bear, once he starts the attack process if you can't stop him with your current approach, then you pick up him say a firm 'no' or hiss in his face (pick one and stick with it), and then place him in a 'time-out' behind a closed door for no more than a couple of minutes. The only way this will eventually work is to do it each and every time - consistency is the key here.

Here are some TCS articles, in case you can find them useful.
How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction – TheCatSite Articles
How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles
Cat Behavior Problems [What to do and what not to do] – TheCatSite Articles

When Bear goes after Tux he has two responses, one is to stare at him then either lay down and sleep or start playing with something. The other reaction is his tail puffs up and he turns sideways while hissing, then he goes on his way.
My female cat has always been nervous even as a kitten, she's about to start Prozac as well. It's not that I'm not worried about her and Bear, but I'm already working with a behaviorist with those two, and thing have begun to improve a bit with them. That works because my dad let's me deal with them how I'm supposed to, he has no contact with Little Bit, although he constantly says let them fight it out as well.

I can try the discipline method, the only reason I didn't was because I read it could cause negative associations with Tux.

 

[jc66]

Bless you, although be careful for yourself.
How To Safely Break Up A Cat Fight – TheCatSite Articles


If you have a clock that audibly ticks, or maybe set your cellphone up to do this, the ticking sound (or a heartbeat sound) can sometimes help calm cats even adult ones.

Thank you, I will try this, right now we have music playing for him at night.

 

[FeebysOwner]

I can try the discipline method, the only reason I didn't was because I read it could cause negative associations with Tux.

I understand, but Bear will more likely view you as the 'meanie' (he may already, with what you are currently doing!). However, you aren't doing anything that a mama cat wouldn't do (actually, you are being much nicer) when trying to teach her kittens that there are limits. Mama cats will swat, bite, and even pounce on kittens to try to teach them better behavior. A hiss or a no and a 1-2 minute removal from the area seems a lot less 'mean'. You don't need to try this in addition to what you are already doing if you think Tux isn't being impacted much.

 

[jc66]

Bless you, although be careful for yourself.
How To Safely Break Up A Cat Fight – TheCatSite Articles


If you have a clock that audibly ticks, or maybe set your cellphone up to do this, the ticking sound (or a heartbeat sound) can sometimes help calm cats even adult ones.

Thank you, I will try this, right now we have music playing for him at night

 

[Hellenww]

When Bear goes after Tux he has two responses, one is to stare at him then either lay down and sleep or start playing with something. The other reaction is his tail puffs up and he turns sideways while hissing, then he goes on his way.

Does Bear continue to pursue Tux after being rebuffed? "Ears up" is usually interest, maybe play, not attack to harm. Is it possible Bear wants to play? I agree "letting them fight it out" is not the way to go. Since your Father will not follow a slow intro, let Tux's behavior lead you.

If Tux can't see Bear coming, tell Bear "NO" so Tux knows he's coming. Someone on the site suggests using a large piece of cardboard to put between them rather than put yourself at risk.

What are their ages?

 

[jc66]

Does Bear continue to pursue Tux after being rebuffed? "Ears up" is usually interest, maybe play, not attack to harm. Is it possible Bear wants to play? I agree "letting them fight it out" is not the way to go. Since your Father will not follow a slow intro, let Tux's behavior lead you.

If Tux can't see Bear coming, tell Bear "NO" so Tux knows he's coming. Someone on the site suggests using a large piece of cardboard to put between them rather than put yourself at risk.

What are their ages?

It very well could be interest. With my female, part of the problem was he wanted to play, but she reacted fearfully and violently, which then made him aggressive, fearful, and curious. Then she runs and his prey drive kicks in (according to a behaviorist). I think some of what's going on with Tux and Bear is curiosity, fear, and aggression.
Tux is 4 years and Bear is 6 years.

 

[jc66]

Does Bear continue to pursue Tux after being rebuffed? "Ears up" is usually interest, maybe play, not attack to harm. Is it possible Bear wants to play? I agree "letting them fight it out" is not the way to go. Since your Father will not follow a slow intro, let Tux's behavior lead you.

If Tux can't see Bear coming, tell Bear "NO" so Tux knows he's coming. Someone on the site suggests using a large piece of cardboard to put between them rather than put yourself at risk.

What are their ages?

The really bad times he will continue to go after Tux and that's when he's yowling, growling, and tries to bite us.
Other times he walks away.

 

[jc66]

[

Does Bear continue to pursue Tux after being rebuffed? "Ears up" is usually interest, maybe play, not attack to harm. Is it possible Bear wants to play? I agree "letting them fight it out" is not the way to go. Since your Father will not follow a slow intro, let Tux's behavior lead you.

If Tux can't see Bear coming, tell Bear "NO" so Tux knows he's coming. Someone on the site suggests using a large piece of cardboard to put between them rather than put yourself at risk.

What are their ages?

So we have the doorway blocked, 6 ft high, and Tux still managed to get over it. Yesterday Tux wasn't affected by the other cats, but today his ears are always back and now he's growling. I'm going to bungee the door shut and try to do reintroducing despite what my father says or does.
I know to start with scent, although none of the cats react to socks that are rubbed allover the face of the other cats. Bear does however, sniff everywhere Fux has been. Can I skip this step since they don't react or should I still do it for a day or 2?

 

[Furballsmom]

I don't know, --I think Bear is confusing me in that regard.

 

[jc66]

I don't know, --I think Bear is confusing me in that regard.

He's a confusing cat, that seems to react more to sight than smell.

 

[Furballsmom]

You know the situation best, I initially was thinking they'd need it but you're likely ok skipping that step

 

[Juliarghh]

Hello,

My two male cats are neutered, both kinda healthy. The new cat just adopted, is Tux, he came from a cat cafe. He's used to new cats, shy, but here he's made himself at home. His only health problem is a problem with his gums so he needs all 4 back teeth pulled.
Our resident cat Bear, is a maine coon, he has Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy, high blood pressure, and anxiety. He's on meds and doing well, although the anxiety meds were just started yesterday, Prozac.
Bear can be quite aggressive with my cat in particular, since the first day they met. He was 6 months old, she was 4 years. The other females he corners, sometimes with his ears back, or he chases until they are huddled on the ground screaming. They don't fight but they scream. His ears are back, tail whipping wildly, and when you intervene he very slowly walks away giving them a side eye, but this only happens maybe twice a year. However, with my cat, it's whenever he sees her, and part of it is her reaction to him.
We lost my other cat in March, and I mentioned I was thinking of adopting, my dad immediately adopted Tux.
Tux pretty much ignores everyone, only going on the defensive when something happens. Bear however, is on the offensive. I tried to do slow introductions, but my dad ruined it, immediately taking Tux out of his room and letting him loose saying cats fight, they'll work it out, no matter how many things I show him otherwise.
Tux loves exploring the house and Bear usually follows in a slightly crouched slow chase. If Tux's back is turned, Bear begins to Trott and tries to attack, I usually intervene. However, sometimes when Bear goes after Tux, his tail is wildly flicking, pupils dilated, and ears straight up, whiskers front as well. He also growls and yowls, and if you try to physically remove him, he tries to bite, which is rare.
Tux, has learned to jump over the multiple pet gates in the room and open the door. We have something rigged to keep him in at night, but he cries all night.
When Bear starts in on Tux, I try to distract him, there's a 50/50 chance it works. When he looks away at me or walks away, I praise him. When he doesn't I just keep on trying.
Is there anyway to help them get along even though my dad tries to ruin it?
P.S. I'm going to try and attach videos, Bear is the brown and white one.

Hi! How did this end up going? Sounds a lot like what's happening with my two boys - resident kitten chases and jumps on new cat. New cat will hide for a bit but generally ends up coming back out quickly. He follows resident cat around the house and is happy to sit near him usually though.

 

[jc66]

Hi! How did this end up going? Sounds a lot like what's happening with my two boys - resident kitten chases and jumps on new cat. New cat will hide for a bit but generally ends up coming back out quickly. He follows resident cat around the house and is happy to sit near him usually though.

So I bought an indoor catio for the new male, he stays in there at bedtime and I feed both on either side, it helps them. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07VRZN9YS/?tag=thecatsite
Mainly they'vecalmed down, maybe because of the Prozac, maybe they are getting used to each other. I distract the aggressive male with whatever I can and praise him, give him pets, or give him treats when he walks away. Sometimes they can sit next to each other. But when Tux, the new cat, starts playing or gets the zoomies, that's when Bear chases him and gets real aggressive. After observing him a behaviorist says Bear has a massive prey drive that's why he chases. It's basically just us having to train him to ignore Tux. The attacks have gone from multiple times a day to once every week or every other week. It took almost two months. We are still trying to introduce Tux to the other cats, but want to get Bear under control first.

 

[jc66]

Hi! How did this end up going? Sounds a lot like what's happening with my two boys - resident kitten chases and jumps on new cat. New cat will hide for a bit but generally ends up coming back out quickly. He follows resident cat around the house and is happy to sit near him usually though.

This is the two of them sitting next to each other. And here is another of them sleeping on me at the same time. So there is hope.

 

[Juliarghh]

This is the two of them sitting next to each other. And here is another of them sleeping on me at the same time. So there is hope.

Oh that is quite positive, isn't it? Happy to hear that it's settling down over time. Gives me hope that my cat (he's 6mths) just needs some time to adjust to his new friend.