Introducing Cats - Logistics Questions.

calicosrspecial

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Ahhhh, good. How was her body language when she was up there? Did she look normal, confident?

Great. The fact she was fine after tells us a lot. That she doesn't think there was any bad intent. That is very good.

"She goes and waits under the guest bed until I let him out so she can try and eat his kitten food." - She is funny. Yep, they do that.

"One of the reasons I think they were both agitated this morning is because I had picked up all the food so they wouldn't eat each other's." - Could be, makes sense. It sometimes happens.

"Hooper especially is a grazer and is fairly picky about his wet food. He had barely touched his wet breakfast but made a beeline for her bowl when he came downstairs." - Of course because they always love what someone else has. :)

"They did share some treats." - GREAT!!! Again, a sign that they are fine. Positive association/positive encounter.

If there were issues we would not be having this kind of update. They are fine. I am confident in that.

Thanks for the update. Great to know.
 
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Ahhhh, good. How was her body language when she was up there? Did she look normal, confident?

Great. The fact she was fine after tells us a lot. That she doesn't think there was any bad intent. That is very good.

"She goes and waits under the guest bed until I let him out so she can try and eat his kitten food." - She is funny. Yep, they do that.

"One of the reasons I think they were both agitated this morning is because I had picked up all the food so they wouldn't eat each other's." - Could be, makes sense. It sometimes happens.

"Hooper especially is a grazer and is fairly picky about his wet food. He had barely touched his wet breakfast but made a beeline for her bowl when he came downstairs." - Of course because they always love what someone else has. :)

"They did share some treats." - GREAT!!! Again, a sign that they are fine. Positive association/positive encounter.

If there were issues we would not be having this kind of update. They are fine. I am confident in that.

Thanks for the update. Great to know.
She was sitting up, alert, with ears forward and tail twitching.

They did better this afternoon. She is OK with gentle play but is very vocal about contact right now, probably because she doesn't feel quite herself. They had a couple of scuffles but otherwise it was similar to yesterday afternoon and she managed to sneak away for a thirty minute nap. She gently batted a toy but wasn't her usual "Rollie pollie" self. Here's a picture of snack time:

IMG_0179.JPG
 

calicosrspecial

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"She was sitting up, alert, with ears forward and tail twitching." - Sounds like very good body language.

"She is OK with gentle play but is very vocal about contact right now, probably because she doesn't feel quite herself." - I think that is probably correct,

I would say snack time is PERFECT!!!

I get a sense Twyla is just not 100% yet. Just give her some rest and when she feels better you can let them enjoy themselves again. Just monitor her and give her love and play with Hooper and give love.

They will be fine. A little break will not harm their relationship.
 
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Sorry for so many posts today. Should I give her a day or two off? Or just see how she feels? Do you think I should put the gates back up on my room so she can choose to interact at the door if she wants? I haven't been using them because it limits my ability to go in there without making a lot of noise and alerting Hooper.

My winter break is over on Monday so our month long kitty boot camp is almost over and I am trying to figure out how best to proceed. My plan is to let them interact a bit in the morning if possible and then let Hooper have the run of the house while I am at work, then mutual time when I get home (as long as they can manage) and let Twyla have the house overnight. Does this sound workable?

We are not quite where I was hoping to be at this point (over two months of shared space time) but we were making great progress before Twyla's health issue.
 

calicosrspecial

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I am so sorry for not responding sooner. I get really busy in late afternoon and on.

No need to apologize on posting.

Do what you think is best. I would see how she feels and importantly how you feel. If she is still a little tender then I would just give them a break.

On gates. Well, it could be a bit frustrating for them. So I would probably just use the door instead. Especially because the door is easier also.

I think your plan is great. Then on weekends try to have an "open door" policy and see how they do. Day time is typically a time they sleep a lot when the humans are gone. You may want to set up a camera and see what he does during the day (by the door to Twyla's room). Then we can transition them to a totally open door life. I think they are probably closer than you think but we need to get the trust in Hooper that all would be ok.

"We are not quite where I was hoping to be at this point (over two months of shared space time) but we were making great progress before Twyla's health issue." - Well, I think you are pretty much there. I think sometimes when we humans are around they want to play more than if we are gone. Because Twyla is a little more "fragile" we have to be more cautious. If she didn't have the health issues I would have them together all the time at this point. I think they are doing great and are intro'd. BUT with Twyla being a little unwell we just have to get a little more confidence Hooper will understand when she is not ready for more play. I do think Hooper has no intention of hurting her and I do think he does respect her desires to some degree. So the only worry I have is something accidental rather than intentional.

How would you disagree with those statements on their relationship? I think I have a pretty good sense of where they are but you are there so I really need your insight.
 
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I am so sorry for not responding sooner. I get really busy in late afternoon and on.

No need to apologize on posting.

Do what you think is best. I would see how she feels and importantly how you feel. If she is still a little tender then I would just give them a break.

On gates. Well, it could be a bit frustrating for them. So I would probably just use the door instead. Especially because the door is easier also.

I think your plan is great. Then on weekends try to have an "open door" policy and see how they do. Day time is typically a time they sleep a lot when the humans are gone. You may want to set up a camera and see what he does during the day (by the door to Twyla's room). Then we can transition them to a totally open door life. I think they are probably closer than you think but we need to get the trust in Hooper that all would be ok.

"We are not quite where I was hoping to be at this point (over two months of shared space time) but we were making great progress before Twyla's health issue." - Well, I think you are pretty much there. I think sometimes when we humans are around they want to play more than if we are gone. Because Twyla is a little more "fragile" we have to be more cautious. If she didn't have the health issues I would have them together all the time at this point. I think they are doing great and are intro'd. BUT with Twyla being a little unwell we just have to get a little more confidence Hooper will understand when she is not ready for more play. I do think Hooper has no intention of hurting her and I do think he does respect her desires to some degree. So the only worry I have is something accidental rather than intentional.

How would you disagree with those statements on their relationship? I think I have a pretty good sense of where they are but you are there so I really need your insight.
I think you are pretty spot on in your assessment. He loves her but doesn't understand that she isn't up to the type of play that he wants to engage in (primarily chasing, especially on the stairs, and that cursed pouncing from behind) and doesn't always know when to quit. She likes him as well and likes to play, but not for as long or as hard as he does. He can get really wound up but it seems to be getting easier to distract him. I think he is slowly learning boundaries, but that is not a continual forward progress. The positives are that he is very respectful when she is eating or using the litter box, for example, and shows her affection. If it wasn't for his not knowing when to quit and my fear that she might get hurt (more from aggravating her arthritis than anything) I would be willing to let them be out all day when I am home. Though there are times I need to get some actual work done and at this point it is difficult to do that when they are going at it.

Twyla is still quite vocal when he crosses a line - hissing, occasional growls and screaming when they wrestle. Hooper doesn't do any of those things.

That being said they have done pretty well today. As usual, she went and hid upstairs so I couldn't shut her in. When I went to let him out she immediately went in his room to check out his food bowl and they had a few minor swat and jump interactions upstairs and then downstairs wrestled a couple of times. But eventually I distracted him enough with play that she went back up stairs and was able to nap for two hours, they then had another round of play which ended when she went in her room and on the bed. They then had another good hour this afternoon. I let him in her room and he got up on the bed and sniffed her, licked her a couple of times and then did the neck bite thing at which point she got up and bopped him on the nose. They walked peacefully past each other a number of times and ate together. They then started playing, together and separately, at varying degrees of intensity up, down and on the stairs. She started to get a little tired so I enticed him into his room with a toy so that she could have some wandering around time (and so I could get some work done!). About 4 hours total.
 

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"I think you are pretty spot on in your assessment." - Great.

"He loves her but doesn't understand that she isn't up to the type of play that he wants to engage in (primarily chasing, especially on the stairs, and that cursed pouncing from behind) and doesn't always know when to quit." Yes, young cat things. She does like that stuff a little :/ but not to the degree he does. If she didn't like it she would be very different. She would be much more forceful with him to stop it, she would avoid him, hide, and definitely not initiate some of it. He is a young cat with boundless energy with a playmate he loves. :/

"He can get really wound up but it seems to be getting easier to distract him. I think he is slowly learning boundaries, but that is not a continual forward progress." - Great that it is easier to distract him. Yes, I agree he seems to be learning boundaries which also is obviously great.

"The positives are that he is very respectful when she is eating or using the litter box, for example, and shows her affection." - These are incredibly important and some of the reasons why they are fine.

"If it wasn't for his not knowing when to quit and my fear that she might get hurt (more from aggravating her arthritis than anything) I would be willing to let them be out all day when I am home." Totally understandable. I think you may be underestimating both of them but let;s wait until they convince you they can be trusted. Her arthritis does worry me but watch how she responds and she what she tells us as to how worried she is etc. Not to say we throw caution to the wind. But just observe her as she will tell you where her line is.

"Though there are times I need to get some actual work done and at this point it is difficult to do that when they are going at it." - Yes. It can be nerve racking. So it is best to try to keep them separated at that moment for now so you can be most productive.

"Twyla is still quite vocal when he crosses a line - hissing, occasional growls and screaming when they wrestle. Hooper doesn't do any of those things." - That is great. She is doing her part to teach him what is ok, what is too much, and what is too risky and dangerous. Yes, he is a youngster, not sure they really have a line.

"As usual, she went and hid upstairs so I couldn't shut her in. When I went to let him out she immediately went in his room to check out his food bowl : - She is funny. And smart.

"But eventually I distracted him enough with play that she went back up stairs and was able to nap for two hours, they then had another round of play which ended when she went in her room and on the bed." - Great.

"They then had another good hour this afternoon. I let him in her room and he got up on the bed and sniffed her, licked her a couple of times and then did the neck bite thing at which point she got up and bopped him on the nose." - Sounds good then she told him "stop it".

"They walked peacefully past each other a number of times and ate together. - Great, at least it isn't 24/7 with him. Thought it may feel close at times.

"They then started playing, together and separately, at varying degrees of intensity up, down and on the stairs. She started to get a little tired so I enticed him into his room with a toy so that she could have some wandering around time (and so I could get some work done!)." - Great and good job!!

"About 4 hours total." WOW, didn't expect that long. I would say they had a GREAT day!!!

I think the really good news is I don't think there will be any negative repercussions from your plan when you go back to work. They have such a great relationship so they are going to be fine with it. That is a really good place to be.
 
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This afternoon was a good example of why the can't be left alone together anytime soon. At least 6 full on screaming wrestling matches (a couple of which were start/stop/start again) in about a one hour period along with chasing. No harm was done, and Twyla is now sitting quietly outside Hooper's door, but I felt it was time to intervene. How much of this type of play is too much? I know both were in a playful mood to start, but then he just gets relentless with the pouncing. She will walk away, but doesn't really go hide, though at one point she hid between the shower curtains and then jumped into the tub itself. Hooper was prepared to jump in after her but I misdirected him because I wanted to prevent any tussling in such an enclosed space.

So less time together today. They had an hour this morning that was better. These two are such a handful!
 

calicosrspecial

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"At least 6 full on screaming wrestling matches (a couple of which were start/stop/start again) in about a one hour period along with chasing. No harm was done, and Twyla is now sitting quietly outside Hooper's door" - So she is sitting outside of his door after these 6 matches? She sure isn't afraid of him. Do you get a sense she kind of enjoys it up to some point?

"I felt it was time to intervene" - Totally fine to intervene when you feel it is necessary. We want to balance fun but not let it get out of control.

"How much of this type of play is too much?" - It depends on how they act. If one of the cats is hiding or acting differently then it is too much. Not that it would tip their relationship but because it might be a sign of risk of being hurt (accidentally) etc.

"I know both were in a playful mood to start, but then he just gets relentless with the pouncing." - Yes, boy will be boys. They do that. :/ Some cats LOVE to pounce. Twyla needs to express her displeasure as he would respect it.

"She will walk away, but doesn't really go hide, though at one point she hid between the shower curtains and then jumped into the tub itself." - The fact she is not hiding/avoiding tells me it is not too much for her. Now the "shower incident". Do you think she was possibly trying to ambush him or playing or was it in fact hiding/avoiding him? What did she do right after this?

Good job on distracting him as I agree, they shouldn't be playing in a bathtub especially with her arthritis.

The amount of time is not as important as the quality of time. And especially how they act after these play sessions. If they act normal then fine. If there is some "difference" (which could be a number of things - walking differently, going certain places, avoiding, hiding, etc then we would be more concerned).

Yes, they can be a handful. It is interesting because they are this way because they like and accept each other so much. Neither one fears the other one. So it is just turn it up and have fun!! If there was more fear etc they would be avoiding each other, more cautious, giving space, etc. You are kind of a victim of your (and their) success. Hooper can't believe he has this great sister that loves to play and let him get away with wildness and she doesn't seem to reprimand him (she seems to kind of enjoy it). So she doesn't seem to smack him in the face and tell him to "get some manners".

It is hard to drain his energy because he is young and he loves to play with her. Maybe try to distract quicker and see if between you and Twyla you can convince him that too much is too much. And let's see how that might help. It sounds like you can distract him for the most part. And when you do this watch Twyla and let us know what she does. We'll see if that helps.
 
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"At least 6 full on screaming wrestling matches (a couple of which were start/stop/start again) in about a one hour period along with chasing. No harm was done, and Twyla is now sitting quietly outside Hooper's door" - So she is sitting outside of his door after these 6 matches? She sure isn't afraid of him. Do you get a sense she kind of enjoys it up to some point?

"I felt it was time to intervene" - Totally fine to intervene when you feel it is necessary. We want to balance fun but not let it get out of control.

"How much of this type of play is too much?" - It depends on how they act. If one of the cats is hiding or acting differently then it is too much. Not that it would tip their relationship but because it might be a sign of risk of being hurt (accidentally) etc.

"I know both were in a playful mood to start, but then he just gets relentless with the pouncing." - Yes, boy will be boys. They do that. :/ Some cats LOVE to pounce. Twyla needs to express her displeasure as he would respect it.

"She will walk away, but doesn't really go hide, though at one point she hid between the shower curtains and then jumped into the tub itself." - The fact she is not hiding/avoiding tells me it is not too much for her. Now the "shower incident". Do you think she was possibly trying to ambush him or playing or was it in fact hiding/avoiding him? What did she do right after this?

Good job on distracting him as I agree, they shouldn't be playing in a bathtub especially with her arthritis.

The amount of time is not as important as the quality of time. And especially how they act after these play sessions. If they act normal then fine. If there is some "difference" (which could be a number of things - walking differently, going certain places, avoiding, hiding, etc then we would be more concerned).

Yes, they can be a handful. It is interesting because they are this way because they like and accept each other so much. Neither one fears the other one. So it is just turn it up and have fun!! If there was more fear etc they would be avoiding each other, more cautious, giving space, etc. You are kind of a victim of your (and their) success. Hooper can't believe he has this great sister that loves to play and let him get away with wildness and she doesn't seem to reprimand him (she seems to kind of enjoy it). So she doesn't seem to smack him in the face and tell him to "get some manners".

It is hard to drain his energy because he is young and he loves to play with her. Maybe try to distract quicker and see if between you and Twyla you can convince him that too much is too much. And let's see how that might help. It sounds like you can distract him for the most part. And when you do this watch Twyla and let us know what she does. We'll see if that helps.
I believe she does enjoy all of this to a point. I think her biggest issue (and maybe this is mine, too) is that oftentimes she is unable to go about her routines or take a stroll around the house without being pounced or chased. So I feel bad for her about that. On the flip side she is definitely getting more mental stimulation and play.

She definitely wasn't hiding in the tub because she was scared. Possibly setting up an ambush or just looking for a quiet place for a minute. I enticed him away from the bathroom and they were back at it pretty quickly.

And she does reprimand him by smacking him in the face at times, and gives warning growls and hisses, which he sometimes respects. But she does also enjoy the play.

If I am nearby I can usually distract him, but I am trying to not hover over them every second. If he gives chase there really isn't any stopping him.
 

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"I think her biggest issue (and maybe this is mine, too) is that oftentimes she is unable to go about her routines or take a stroll around the house without being pounced or chased." - Yes, probably. But it sounds like she would be willing to tell him enough. I always try to let the cat tell me what they think. Sometimes we can think things and worry more than the cats do.

"On the flip side she is definitely getting more mental stimulation and play." - I think this is a really great positive for her. I get a sense she is enjoying his presence.

"She definitely wasn't hiding in the tub because she was scared. Possibly setting up an ambush or just looking for a quiet place for a minute." - GREAT. I am guessing it was more ambush since there would be other and better places to get some peace. But I am really glad she didn't seem to be hiding.

"I enticed him away from the bathroom and they were back at it pretty quickly." - Good job on distracting him. Was Twyla looking for him when she came out? Or did she come out and did he make a beeline to her? And if the latter, how did she respond?

"And she does reprimand him by smacking him in the face at times, and gives warning growls and hisses, which he sometimes respects." - This is really good as it shows that she is not afraid to reprimand him. wants to teach him, and that he respects her. The fact she allows it to go a little further suggests she probably doesn't as she would probably make the point a little stronger.

"If I am nearby I can usually distract him" - That is very good and suggests there is no bad intent.

"but I am trying to not hover over them every second." - Good, they need to work it out themselves as well.

"If he gives chase there really isn't any stopping him." - No, it is very hard. It is when they "catch" is when it is the easiest to end it. That is normal. Some cats love to be chased, initiate chase (meaning wanting to be chased). And another cat sees something act like prey they will chase. It is in there DNA. But it is what happens during the "catch" and after the incident that tells us everything. If they act normal then it is all for fun.

I know it is hard because Twyla is more fragile with her arthritis and we don't want her to get injured. So just try to distract Hooper as much as you like. I don't think there is any risk of harming their relationship. She will also do her part if you are not there and he gets a little too much. I know you are worried she may not be forceful enough but I get a sense if it gets to be too much she will. Like when she came back from the vet and was more forceful. Maybe she needs to be a bit more forceful to tell him but I think she will get there. And I think Hooper will respect it. There is no question there is love and respect between them so the only worry I have is she gets sore or hurt accidentally. I don;t get a sense Hooper would intentionally do something bad to her.

It is interesting. I had a picture of Twyla in my mind at the beginning. I have a totally different picture of her now. Not sure if either one is/was correct but she seems a lot more active and full of life. It is really cool if I have the right picture now.
 
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Today was pretty good. We had severe weather and Twyla is scared of storms so I was curious to see what would happen. Overall she wasn't in much of a playful mood (not the best weather for her joints) and would growl or hiss if Hooper approached or jump up on the kitchen island to observe him. They wrestled a few times but Hooper seemed more easily distracted by me today and she was able to get away from him for a few short naps.

Interesting moments:

Twyla was in my room with the door shut while Hooper was having his crazy time when the storm blew in. She meowed LOUDLY to be let out as she likes to hide upstairs during storms. I let her out and she paused at the bottom of the steps. Hooper came over, sniffed her and then gave her a few little licks. I distracted him and he let her go upstairs to hide (though he did bother her later). Later she went into his room to eat the crumbs in his bowl and he came in, sniffed her and started washing her again! He then went for her neck and she cuffed him and then walked away. She might enjoy the washing more if he would lick in the same direction as her hair growth :lol:

Still later, she was sitting on the kitchen island with me while I worked and Hooper was playing. He disappeared for awhile and I moved to the couch and she followed me and got on my lap. This is the first time she has done that when he has been out! After about 5 minutes Hooper showed up and sat on the floor and they batted paws while she was on my lap. When she wouldn't budge he jumped up by my feet and continued batting. She hissed at him and got down and he followed her, but didn't go into chase mode. She snuck past him into her room and I shut the door for her. I'm sure there is some sibling rivalry for lap time, so was relieved that nothing major erupted on top of me.

Probably about three hours altogether. I gave Twyla more private time today because of the weather situation and put Hooper in a brief timeout during the worst of the storm so he wouldn't disturb her while she was stressed. It also seemed that Hooper did better at playing by himself (meaning not always chasing Twyla or needing to be distracted by me).



Twyla has always been fairly playful, but Hooper has definitely brought out different aspects of her personality.
 
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She might enjoy the washing more if he would lick in the same direction as her hair growth :lol:

This is the first time she has done that when he has been out!
That's too funny about the washing in the wrong direction :lol:.

I miss my two in my lap when Gracie is out, they stay off the couch, so I'm very glad to know it comes back! :cloud9:
 

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I think that is a great day. Twyla being in a more stressed mood (due to storms, arthritis, etc) and it not escalating is fantastic. And it sounds like Hooper got the message (maybe eventually).

"She meowed LOUDLY to be let out .........:" - I wonder if she wanted to be with him as she paused at the bottom of the steps.

"Hooper came over, sniffed her and then gave her a few little licks." - That is so cute!!

"I distracted him and he let her go upstairs to hide" - Good job.

"Later she went into his room to eat the crumbs in his bowl and he came in, sniffed her and started washing her again! He then went for her neck and she cuffed him and then walked away." - So cute and then the really fantastic part. She walked away and all was well. I LOVE this!!

"She might enjoy the washing more if he would lick in the same direction as her hair growth" - :flail:

"Still later, she was sitting on the kitchen island with me while I worked and Hooper was playing. He disappeared for awhile and I moved to the couch and she followed me and got on my lap. This is the first time she has done that when he has been out!" - That is so cute. A great sign.

"After about 5 minutes Hooper showed up and sat on the floor and they batted paws while she was on my lap. When she wouldn't budge he jumped up by my feet and continued batting." - Yep, he wanted her attention.

"She hissed at him and got down and he followed her, but didn't go into chase mode." - That is great. I think it is all about getting her attention.

"I'm sure there is some sibling rivalry for lap time, so was relieved that nothing major erupted on top of me." - I don't think so. I think he is just like "hey, what about me, I wanna play. Pay attention to me too". It is actually a VERY good sign nothing major erupted as it wasn't a "territory" thing. This is a reason why I don't think it was a rivalry thing.

"Probably about three hours altogether. I gave Twyla more private time today because of the weather situation and put Hooper in a brief timeout during the worst of the storm so he wouldn't disturb her while she was stressed. It also seemed that Hooper did better at playing by himself (meaning not always chasing Twyla or needing to be distracted by me)." - Great amount of time. Good job of giving her more space. Hooper sounds like he did really well. Showed restraint, respect. And he was happy with playing on his own (at least for a little while).

Overall, I think it was a great day and tells us a lot about where they are. I think they are in a great place. I know it is not perfect as we want him to be a bit more restrained but they love each other and that will overcome everything.

Just keep doing what you are doing. Hopefully this experience will continue (Hooper paying less attention to her). Keep up the great work.
 
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Twylasmom

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The past couple of days we have been working on transitioning to a new schedule since I am back at work full time as of today. Hooper seems to enjoy being left out on his own while I am gone, yesterday I came home and he was sleeping on the couch and today he was in the guest room. They get an hour or two together in the morning and the same in the afternoon when I get home. The big issue is Twyla eventually gets tired of being hounded by Hooper and just wants to get away, but I don't always want to end it with shutting her in her room or hiding upstairs. She enjoys having some time to roam the downstairs (using the scratching post, watching the birds on the patio, sitting with me) without being jumped on. So I am trying to give her some time to do that without Hooper around, even if it is just an hour in the afternoon. Today he is absolutely throwing a fit while I am giving her that time even though he was out all day and had an hour of play when I got home and will get another couple hours soon. I think he got really spoiled over break! Hopefully we will settle into our new routine soon.

They generally start out well together and then build to rougher play after about 30 to 45 minutes. The big issue remains that Hooper just doesn't take the cue to quit and leave her alone. Of course she sends mixed signals, like going upstairs and lying in wait for him in his room!

I know we have made so much progress but getting over the hurdle of longer periods of peaceful interaction and/ or just ignoring each other seems to be a long time coming.
 
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Twylasmom

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Ugh. This morning has been horrible. Lots of fur flying and drawn out "fights." Ended up with having to shut Hooper in his room for the day and leaving Twyla out. He was so wound up and wouldn't leave her alone and I think she was on edge because of the weather. Praying for a better time tonight when I get home.

I worry that he is getting bigger and stronger and might hurt her, even if it is play. :(
 

calicosrspecial

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"Today he is absolutely throwing a fit while I am giving her that time even though he was out all day and had an hour of play when I got home and will get another couple hours soon. I think he got really spoiled over break!" - Cats often times get to a point where they no longer accept having territory taken away and I think that is where Hooper now is. :( When you came home he was on the couch. I think we are going to have to work on distracting him while she has access to the house and then since Twyla seems ok to be in your bedroom to have her in there for the time being. And I think at this point you are going to have to work on distracting him at all times when he tries to interact with Twyla. To try to teach him that something other than Twyla is appropriate.

Does Hooper ever play with toys that don;t require human interaction? I like to have a ball that a cat can't grip and throw but can bat around the floor playing football. That can keep a cat engaged as it acts like a mouse in ways. But it has to be a ball they can't grab with their nails and throw it around.

Are they still eating together? Maybe we can think about having him have a slow feeder to give her more time as well?

I am guessing this morning is a function of the change in routine. Where was Hooper during the night?

Did Twyla "fight" back this morning?

How did they act after these "fights"?

Did they eat together before this? Did it go well?

I am thinking it probably will be best to have Hooper out during the day and have Twyla in your bedroom since she enjoys it. During the day they typically sleep (at least Twyla would). Hooper might be running around for some of the time.

I think Hooper having less access to her is frustrating to him and there is pent up energy. And combine that with a feeling of territory not being accessible might be causing issues as well.

So tonight, really distract Hooper in every way you can. Make sure they eat together. And try to hang out with Twyla with him out and about then have the evening with Twyla in her room (I think she sleeps with you but anywhere she is happy) and let Hooper have access to the rest of the house.

I think the change in routine is causing some issues but they will adjust. :/ I know it is not fast enough.

I know, I don;t sense Hooper has any intentional desire to hurt her but it could happen accidentally. :/ I think he just enjoys her too much.
 
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"Today he is absolutely throwing a fit while I am giving her that time even though he was out all day and had an hour of play when I got home and will get another couple hours soon. I think he got really spoiled over break!" - Cats often times get to a point where they no longer accept having territory taken away and I think that is where Hooper now is. :( When you came home he was on the couch. I think we are going to have to work on distracting him while she has access to the house and then since Twyla seems ok to be in your bedroom to have her in there for the time being. And I think at this point you are going to have to work on distracting him at all times when he tries to interact with Twyla. To try to teach him that something other than Twyla is appropriate.

Does Hooper ever play with toys that don;t require human interaction? I like to have a ball that a cat can't grip and throw but can bat around the floor playing football. That can keep a cat engaged as it acts like a mouse in ways. But it has to be a ball they can't grab with their nails and throw it around.

Are they still eating together? Maybe we can think about having him have a slow feeder to give her more time as well?

I am guessing this morning is a function of the change in routine. Where was Hooper during the night?

Did Twyla "fight" back this morning?

How did they act after these "fights"?

Did they eat together before this? Did it go well?

I am thinking it probably will be best to have Hooper out during the day and have Twyla in your bedroom since she enjoys it. During the day they typically sleep (at least Twyla would). Hooper might be running around for some of the time.

I think Hooper having less access to her is frustrating to him and there is pent up energy. And combine that with a feeling of territory not being accessible might be causing issues as well.

So tonight, really distract Hooper in every way you can. Make sure they eat together. And try to hang out with Twyla with him out and about then have the evening with Twyla in her room (I think she sleeps with you but anywhere she is happy) and let Hooper have access to the rest of the house.

I think the change in routine is causing some issues but they will adjust. :/ I know it is not fast enough.

I know, I don;t sense Hooper has any intentional desire to hurt her but it could happen accidentally. :/ I think he just enjoys her too much.
Hooper is very good going into his room at "bedtime" and is quiet all night - this probably contributes to his hyperkinetic energy in the morning. I really wanted to leave him out and shut Twyla in this morning but he was the easier one to catch and I was in a time crunch. But I agree he needs the time out during the day.

I am already either keeping an eye on him or distracting him the majority of the time. It's when they are on the move that the bad stuff usually happens. I will keep at it!

"Does Hooper ever play with toys that don;t require human interaction?" Yes, he does. He will bat springs or balls around though he does like me to throw the springs for him.

"Are they still eating together? Maybe we can think about having him have a slow feeder to give her more time as well?" They do in the afternoon and evening. In the morning they eat at the same time but separately (primarily because Twyla demands feeding at 6:30 and I try to go back to sleep for an hour after, if I don't feed then there is no sleep for me). Once they are out, the first thing each one does is goes for the other's dry food. When they do eat together, Twyla is focused just on her food and Hooper will watch but doesn't bother her, but he is often more interested in watching her than eating. I usually have to pick up his unfinished food so she won't eat it.

"I am guessing this morning is a function of the change in routine. Where was Hooper during the night?" Hooper is in his room at night. Twyla is more nocturnal and likes to roam a bit during the night.

"Did Twyla "fight" back this morning?" Yes, she did.

"How did they act after these "fights"?" Hooper either ran away and did something else, or came right back for round two. Twyla would either walk away if she had the opportunity or hold her position (usually lying down). She didn't go hide but seemed a bit subdued. Weather was probably a factor, too. It was raining pretty hard and that always stresses her.

"Did they eat together before this? Did it go well?" No. He did sit and watch her as she ate some of his dry food.

I'm hoping it was just a bad morning. They did have some good moments, it's just that things always seem to escalate to the rough play/fight. It would be fine it it was one and done, but he just doesn't know when to back off. When I get home I am going to give him some time with just me before they interact. I just feel like we are stuck at this stage and wonder if we will ever get past it.

Thanks for the support!
 

calicosrspecial

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That is great he is good about "going to bed". Yes, they do have pent up energy in the morning. AND usually around 8 or 9pm. That is the time they hunt in the wild typically.

"It's when they are on the move that the bad stuff usually happens." - Is Twyla walking away? When the bad stuff happens?

Good that Hooper plays with those. Keep trying to encourage that.

Ok, good on them eating. Positive. Yes, they do like to focus on the other cat's food.

"Hooper is in his room at night. Twyla is more nocturnal and likes to roam a bit during the night." - Interesting. DO you think she goes to his room at night?

""Did Twyla "fight" back this morning?" Yes, she did." - That is not necessarily bad as we want her to communicate her disinterest.

""How did they act after these "fights"?" Hooper either ran away and did something else, or came right back for round two. Twyla would either walk away if she had the opportunity or hold her position (usually lying down). She didn't go hide but seemed a bit subdued. Weather was probably a factor, too. It was raining pretty hard and that always stresses her." - Interesting he would run away. He is understanding a little BUT he doesn't seem to really fear her. Was she exposing her belly?

""Did they eat together before this? Did it go well?" No. He did sit and watch her as she ate some of his dry food." - That sounds fine.

"I'm hoping it was just a bad morning. They did have some good moments, it's just that things always seem to escalate to the rough play/fight. It would be fine it it was one and done, but he just doesn't know when to back off. When I get home I am going to give him some time with just me before they interact. I just feel like we are stuck at this stage and wonder if we will ever get past it." - I think it was a "bad morning". It actually doesn't sound all that bad and there were positives. I am not bothered by Twyla's actions and he did get it for a while. No, he doesn't know when to back off because he sees it as play. And he likes her. I am guessing he thinks "oh this is different, should be fun".

Oh, we may be a little stuck BUT we have the change in routine happening and the bad weather. Things don't switch on a dime AND it doesn't sound like it was really a fight. If they were acting differently (hiding etc) then I would be more concerned but they are way past the risk of them not getting along. It is just getting Hooper to stop being infatuated with her 24/7. He will get bored and the novelty will wear off.

We will get past this. Just when not if.

You are welcome. We will get there. I think you are a victim of your success. Hooper loves her and trusts her so doesn't always listen to her (though he seems to at times) and he does respect her. We don't have a fundamental issue here which is great. We just have a novelty, excitement issue. Which we can overcome. I know it is frustrating but we will get through this. Twyla might have to get a bit more forceful to let him know. But it doesn't sound like Hooper has any mean intent (which is great).

Don't worry, we'll get there. I suspect they will cuddle together in the future.
 
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