I'm going on two back-to-back trips over two weeks soon. I'm worried about how it will affect my relationship with my cat when I get back

[AaronZC]

Hi everyone. Hopefully this is the right section of the forum. I'm looking for advice on what to expect and preventative measures regarding my cat's relationship with me following my time away.

I'm a relatively new cat owner. My girlfriend and I live in an apartment together with our 14-month-old female ragdoll who we've had for almost a year now. This is my first cat.

The cat is very used to our company as someone has been home with her the majority of the time ever since we've gotten her. However, on Sunday my girlfriend and I will be going away for 5 days and will be taking the cat to stay with a trusted family friend for that time. I'll only be back for one day before I have to leave again for a week. My girlfriend will not be coming on the second trip though and will be able to care for the cat as usual.

My anxiety comes from the fact that I've heard that being away from your cat for long periods of time can cause them to feel resentment / estranged from you when you get back. In my case, not only will I be gone for about two weeks, but for 5 of those days the cat will have neither of us around, in an unfamiliar place with an unfamiliar person, only to have me come back for one day, and leave again. I can only imagine how confused this will make her.

What level of estrangement do you think this may cause my cat to feel from me when I'm finally back? Can this be a long-term thing, or am I likely to be able to repair my relationship with my cat quickly? Is there a chance that she will never feel the same towards me afterwards? What can I do to prevent this happening? And lastly, any advice on leaving your cat with someone else for several days is appreciated as well.

Thanks in advance

 

[Juniper_Junebug]

I am also a first time cat "owner" and can share my experience of one. I went on a two week vacation over Christmas/New Years, leaving my cat with a live-in sitter she had never met before. When I got back, my cat hid for the first 30 minutes or so, and I let her. But pretty soon she realized it was me and she was super affectionate and couldn't stop loving on me. Maybe I'm lucky but my cat doesn't seem to hold a grudge. She just gets out of sorts and takes some time to recognize me. Then she becomes extra affectionate / clingy for a day or so.

When I leave my cat at my mom's house, even for shorter periods, she is more out of sorts, even once or twice hissing at me. Not in anger but fear. But she eventually came around once we got home. You need to prepare for the stress of trying to get her in a carrier when she's not sure she wants anyone touching her. I did give my mom a blanket my cat likes (and that I've had on me so it's got my smell too), plus a litter box she had used before and some favorite toys and treats.

I've learned through this forum to take a shower first thing when I get back from a long trip. The worst re-intro I had was after an international trip where in put on a random perfume at duty-free...

 

[tabbytom]

Hi everyone.

and welcome to TCS!

Your plan of pet sitting your cat looks ok. Since there's a few days before you leave, I would suggest that you bring your cat over for a few hours over the couple of days at your trusted family friend's place. This is to get your cat used to the environment and also to the people in the family. Also bring her toys and blankets to the joys so that there's some sort of familiar scents when she's there.

Also your girlfriend is not going with you on the second trip, it's good that your cat will be home with your girlfriend and back to familiar place and scents.

Definitely your cat will miss you as there's only two of you in the house but because her contact is only the two of you, she'll miss you but it'll only be temporary and once you get back from your trip, remember to give her lots of hugs and kisses. Don't worry, go enjoy your trip. You can video call her whole you are away.

 

[cmshap]

I wouldn't worry about this so much. I also have a cat who was my first cat ever, but we are going on 9 years together now. I've been away for ~2-week trips a few times.

I personally use a service where someone comes to my home twice a day, and feeds, scoops litter, and plays with him for a while. So I haven't brought him to another home, I don't have experience with that aspect.

Willy greeted me at the door as if nothing happened as soon as I got back.

Of course, my cat is one cat. They all have their own personalities. But they all love to settle back into their routines. They may be thrown off by sudden changes, but once they have the chance to resume what is familiar to them, they take it.

I have family with cats, too, so I'm not basing my comment on just my one cat. They all take trips and have great relationships with their cats.

 

[Alldara]

I have both brought my cat to another home and had him stay at home. Actually, at one point, we experienced some damage to our apartment that left us homeless for a few months. We stayed at a family member's home and a trusted friend had my cats for 3 months. I visited once a week.

I didn't find any of this made a problem with my cats. They learned I always returned. A bribe when you return can be helpful.