If you can't choke a cat, then what?!

[ploofka]

I have the sweetest, most wonderful, cool, awesome cat in the whole wide world, you would say so yourself if you met him, but every evening from the moment we walk in the door he hounds us nonstop crying, begging, stares, and rubbing our legs trying to get us to feed him his canned food.  It's up and down off our laps, and every time we get up to get something from the kitchen or go take a pee, he's running over to his bowl like we're going to feed him as if an overabundance of dry kibbles is not enough for his fat-cat-in-a-healthy-cat's-body of an appetite.  Crying constantly and rubbing his snotty nose all over my clothing and skin.  It's so annoying, I just want to throw a chair at him or choke him and throw him through our sliding glass door over the deck and into the back yard of our apartment building!  Besides possibly rage counseling for myself, is there anything I can do to get him to stop wining like a little pussy (perhaps bad choice of words) from 5:30 until the moment we feed him just before bed?

(Please sense the sarcasm in my comment, don't be sending ASPCA out after me, thanks...but this seriously is  annoying)

 

[jcat]

The easiest thing to do would be to give him a half can of food when you get home from work and the rest before bedtime, assuming you're feeding him so late because you don't want him waking you up at night. If he prefers canned food to dry, as your post suggests, you could simply switch him to all canned, which is healthier, anyway, because it contains fewer carbs and is more similar to feline prey than dry is.There are quite a few threads in the nutrition forum discussing the advantages of canned over dry food.

 

[simka]

I don't understand why you don't feed him his wet food when you come home. Most cats love wet food and many prefer it over dry so it's not surprising he tries to get you to give it to him as soon as possible. He's being smart, though you find it annoying. There isn't a way to stop him. He loves his wet food and he wants it as soon as possible. Leaving out an overabundance of dry food isn't the healthiest form of feeding. Can't you give him wet food in the morning  and when you get home and leave out a very small amount of dry?
 

 

[tarasgirl06]

I would seriously ask myself, if I was you, if you are a loving guardian to your cat.  Perhaps rehoming him would be the best decision for you, as it certainly doesn't sound like you love him.

 

[kittylover23]

I agree, Tarasgirl. I would definitely reconsider owning an animal if I were you (based on your choice of words).

 

[ritz]

Assuming Ploofka is saying this somewhat 'tongue in cheek' and really loves her cat and wants to keep him furever:  definitely do feed more wet food.  More filling, less carbs.

Ritz is food centric (as I am, but that's an issue for my therapist).  But I've come to learn that as soon as she gets a certain amount of F A T (fat!), she quiets down.  (I feed 100% raw food.)

Also I've learned that not all meows mean Feed me; sometimes they mean, pay attention to me.  NOW!  I don't care that you've had a rotten day; I need some lovin (and, enterainment) NOW!  Sometimes, meows, headbuts mean absolutely nothing.  I am Feline, hear me Roar.

PS:  Ritz sometimes gets especially cuddly if she is not feeling well.  Just putting that out there....

 

[gloriajh]

you didn't say if he was neutered?

mine whine if they're hungry, one or two of them will even get grouchy and pick a fight with the other cats if they are't fed 

 - 

- feeding quality food might give the nutrients to satisfy his needs - if you're feeding foods with mostly grains, and additives, etc., instead of what a cat requires, - which is m-e-a-t -, then maybe he's just hungry, hungry, hungry...

too many carbs, like in most kibble foods, causes fat cats, just like people - and yet hunger still exists - maybe if he gets quality protein he'll be satisfied (?)

he probably is also very lonely if you are gone all day - cats are not all that independent as some think - they are very social creatures

for feeding ideas - have you been to these websites?  : http://www.catinfo.org/    or   http://www.littlebigcat.com/category/nutrition/

meanwhile - no choking allowed for any reason  

  just love, love, and more lovin'   

 

[rad65]

Besides possibly rage counseling for myself, is there anything I can do to get him to stop wining like a little pussy (perhaps bad choice of words) from 5:30 until the moment we feed him just before bed?

After reading your entire post, I would recommend anger management even if you hadn't mentioned your desires to beat and torture your cat (BTW, yes, I consider throwing a chair at and choking your cat to be beating and torture). You came to the wrong place to be spewing out that crap. Maybe taking care of an animal isn't for you? Every term you used to describe your cat is offensive, from snotty nose all the way to blatantly using the double entendre that is part of the quote I used. You do realize that taking care of a cat is like taking care of a baby for his entire life, right? He will always be dependent on you, and the only way he has of expressing what he wants is to meow, whine, and rub against you. Obviously something is wrong with him if he is whining. Cats aren't vindictive, they don't go out of their way to make people mad or be annoying.

 

[qatz]

Cats can make quite a fuss when they want something.  I feed my cat as soon as I get home from work but

on weekends she starts fussing, crying, rubbing, etc. for her dinner from noon to  all the way until

regular dinner time.

This is just the way cats are.  If you bothers you so much, then perhaps cats are not really for you.  Find a

good home for your cat and get a goldfish instead.

 

[barbb]

A cat's natural eating habit is to have several small meals a day. When cats are hungry they become aggressive, hence the rubbing and persistence to be fed.:-(

I have the impression your cat is coming at you for attention and food at the exact time you really want to kick back and relax and decompress from the day. It may be that you were feeding her some of your own food when you are eating and she is used to that. A routine has been established inadvertently by you, and now you are wondering what the heck is happening. She is probably associating the food and attention she has gotten in the past around this time of day with you :-) and is just waiting for that time of day when she is happiest and gets the most from you. 

I think you should feed your kitty three times- in the morning, after work (5:30?) and before bedtime. I would also use a laser light for around 10 minutes after each meal if you can afford to make that a routine- because cats are usually active after they eat, for about 10 minutes, sometimes more. This should also work off some of your kitty's fat LOL.If those play times aren't good for you, find another time(s). The key is routine. If you set the routine and stick to it, your cat will follow it. But you have to provide adequate food to stave off the aggression, as well as adequate playtime. Just like little children, kitties will act out if they are marginalized. 

Another thing that sounds like it would be a great fit for your kitty is this ball where you can put dry food in it and the cat can play with it to get the food out .

Last but not least, I hate to recommend that you consider adding a cat, but it does sound as if your cat needs more attention and maybe a playmate. Before doing that, do what I said above and see how that works. 

Someone else recommended rehoming your cat. I would not do that unless you really feel this cat is a bad match and you have not had it very long. But most cats will do the same thing if they think they will get food at x time each day somehow. 

You can also buy a food dispenser that will automatically give food if you are late getting home from work. https://www.google.com/search?ix=aca&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=cat+food+dispenser. That way you can stick to the routine of feeding at 5:30. For exercise you might also want to get a cat tree (costco has inexpensive ones periodically) and run her up and down the tree with the laser, or use a string on a stick. You really need to do this at least once a day between dinner and bedtime, otherwise you just need to expect that your kitty will bother you for attention! LOL. Good luck!

 

[whollycat]

I have the sweetest, most wonderful, cool, awesome cat in the whole wide world, you would say so yourself if you met him, but every evening from the moment we walk in the door he hounds us nonstop crying, begging, stares, and rubbing our legs trying to get us to feed him his canned food.  It's up and down off our laps, and every time we get up to get something from the kitchen or go take a pee, he's running over to his bowl like we're going to feed him as if an overabundance of dry kibbles is not enough for his fat-cat-in-a-healthy-cat's-body of an appetite.  Crying constantly and rubbing his snotty nose all over my clothing and skin.  It's so annoying, I just want to throw a chair at him or choke him and throw him through our sliding glass door over the deck and into the back yard of our apartment building!  Besides possibly rage counseling for myself, is there anything I can do to get him to stop wining like a little pussy (perhaps bad choice of words) from 5:30 until the moment we feed him just before bed?

(Please sense the sarcasm in my comment, don't be sending ASPCA out after me, thanks...but this seriously is  annoying)

Okay, assuming you're truly serious with your post, even if sarcasm-laced, below is my advice:

Ditch the kibble and feed him a grain-free meat-as-first-ingredient canned, which doesn't sound like would be hard to do for your sweet boy.

Others gave good links to great info. I'll add a couple too. Please read all linked info provided by all of us. Regarding kibble: http://www.holisticat.com/no-kibble.html Regarding choosing a better canned food: http://www.holisticat.com/commercial.html

Ditch the kibble; it's not satisfying him. The ingredients in most kibble is comprised of fillers and other cat-inappropriate ingredients that are not bio-available to them, so they are hungrier--and have to drink copious amounts of water to compensate for the lack of moisture in kibble. Also regarding water intake: physiologically kitties do not have the thirst mechanism like dogs or humans do, so will not drink enough water to compensate--they get the majority of their moisture/water from the foods they consume. Humans and dogs get thirsty and know it's time to drink something--cats do NOT have this and will not drink enough to keep them well-hydrated.

Feed him canned before you go to work and when you get home--do NOT restrict how much canned you leave out for him (you do not want to restrict his caloric intake at this time--since I don't know for sure it he's overweight; if he needs two 3oz cans each meal, so be it for the time being). At bedtime you could offer a smaller meal of a partial can; refrigerate the rest, and warm it in a baggie in warm water to serve the remainder the next day. Some kitties won't accept left over canned food rewarmed, so you may have to just toss it.

If you're serious about what you posted, I have some questions:

Is he eating the kibble? What kibble are you feeding him, i.e. brand? Is he overweight? What time do you feed him in the morning? How long is he left with just kibble before you get home?

I ask about about him being overweight, and highly suggest NOT limiting his canned above, because these kitties especially should NEVER go without food for an extended time or they can develop hepatic lipidosis (fatty liver disease), which is very serious and can cause death if not reversed: http://www.marvistavet.com/html/body_hepatic_lipidosis.html

If you are not willing to do what has been suggested by us to your post, please find your kitty a new, loving home, or take him to a no-kill shelter. Frankly, your post disturbed me because I would do anything out of an immense love and respect for my kitties.

 

[ploofka]

I can't seem to reply to each person, so I'll just have to address them individually here.

Jcat- thanks for your suggestions.  At one point we were feeding him twice in the evenings, and even in the morning.  We'd feed him when we got home, and he started associating us coming home with him eating.  Now we just feed him in the evening, so if we come home at noon on a Sunday, he just keeps on napping.  I agree that it's healthier to feed cats the canned foods, because they're more meat and less carb based, and they are predators, so they're used to eating one big meal, and not grazing.  But Ploofka is not an easy cat- he's never been.  He's ten years old at this point, and he doesn't have any molars or premolars.  Apparently his previous owner didn't take good care of him as a kitten, and as a result I've had to front the bill for three extractions.  All that to say, if I don't leave out kibbles for him, which he can eat, and the vet has verified, he won't have enough calories with just eating one can in the evening.  Additionally, I can't feed him a whole bunch in the evening, because he will throw it up.  Because of his teeth issues, he's never been an all-you-can eat cat.  He may naturally be a predator, but he's adapted a grazer lifestyle.  But I appreciate your suggestions.

Simka- Thank you for your suggestion.  And I like your name, it's a lot like mine.  We have tried to feed him in the morning, however, as we all know cats adapt daily routines, and weekends don't register for Ploofka.  Also, as I've mentioned Ploofka is a very vocal little boy...think Siamese + volume.  If we start feeding him in the morning (again), whenever he wakes up he'll be sure to wake us up.  Just because you get a cat doesn't mean that you should forever be void of necessary sleep...that's why you have a kid.

Tarasagirl- Thanks for your suggestion, but it's clear you didn't read my whole post...all 8 lines of it...like the part about the sarcasm??? And if you had any idea what I've gone through for the past 6 years for my cat you'd be questioning if you even love YOUR cat.  Take a joke.

Kittylover- See Tarasagirl.

Ritz- Thanks for reading my whole post, and having a sense of humor yourself, oh and thanks for your suggestion.  Hey maybe we have the same therapist! Ha!  I wish I could feed more wet food.  He actually used to be an all dry food cat, but when I got him I started feeding him wet food for the calories. Now I buy some nice and expensive canned food for him, chocked full of calories...so they tell me.  He is a very affectionate little boy, I will say, which is one of the reasons he is so awesome.  Two days a week I work from home, and he works right here with me on my lap.  It's pretty cool.  Anyway, thanks for your suggestions, and for recognizing...and reading...my sarcasm.

Gloria- Thanks for your suggestions.  Yes, Ploofka is fixed.  I agree feeding them meat is the best way to go.  I've tried to buy the most meat-filled cat foods...at least my receipts tell me so $$.  Sometimes I give him lunch meat or tuna from the can, which he usually likes. (of course I worry about giving him the tuna with the mercury in it, so it's rare).  Thanks for the links...I'll take the tips and try and find a more protein-based dry food that I can leave out.  He actually is a very social kitty, and I think he likes being around other cats, but we had another cat (a girl), and with them both in our apartment one of them was marking.  So we had to give her to my parents.  I worry about adding another cat to the mix, because one day I came in and Ploofka was squatting around our bath mat ready to do his business...I thought she was marking, but when I saw that I started to think that it could've been him the whole time!  Anyway, thanks for your suggestions!
 

Rad- Your comments aren't necessary, and if you would've read the entire post you would understand the sarcasm.  Please have a sense of humor and take a joke.  And you're completely wrong, just because a cat is whining doesn't mean something is wrong with him.  That's like saying that just because a dog is barking something is wrong with them.  Dogs bark all the time!  And a cat is not a baby, I know that's hard for you to understand, but there are very clear differences between a cat and a baby.

Qatz- Next time you post a problem about what your cat is doing, I'm just going to write "this is just what cats do, get over it."  What do you think this thread is for?!  It's an "I have a problem, I'd like to know what other people have done to resolve this same problem" site!  If all you have is "that's what cats do get over it," then you don't belong on this site.

Barb- Thanks for your comment.  You're very correct that he likes to bother us when we most want to be left alone.  That's a good assumption...and yes, that adds to the annoyance.  But we don't ever feed him off the table, in fact, with the exception of what we drop on the ground in the kitchen and the rare times we feed him tuna or lunchmeat, he doesn't eat people food.  In fact we don't pay attention to him while we're eating at the dinner table, because we don't want him getting in the practice of bugging us at dinner or our friends when they're over for dinner.  I think we've done a really good job with this, and it shows.  We've tried feeding him multiple times throughout the day, but that doesn't work (see response to Jcat).  I like the laser pointer idea, but he's not really a player.  We got him all these toys, laser pointers, balls, even one of those feather/bird wand things, and he gets excited for 10 seconds, then tries to play lying down.  I think he's smart.  I think he realizes that it's just a silly light thing or some feathers connected to a string...either that or he's just getting old and lazy, which could very well be the case.  The vet says he's a geriatric cat...of course I kindof think of that as his way of saying "you should probably start bringing him in every couple months instead of yearly to pay us more."  At 10 years I know he's getting old, but I wouldn't call him "geriatric."  Anyway... That ball sounds really cool.  I'll have to look into that.  Thanks for the suggestion.  As for adding another cat, we had another cat, and that didn't go so well. (see response to Gloria).  I agree, rehoming would be horribly traumatic for him...we don't even like to take him to the vet for shots- we have a vet tech friend who's offered to come into our house to give him his vaccines.  This is his home, and we are the ones who take care of him.  He gets depressed when we take him to my parents while we're on vacation- he's a totally different cat.  Rehoming is the worst suggestion, but what do they know?  Anyway, I wish they made a dispenser for wet food!  Thanks for your suggestions...I'll see about some different toys that he might like...I'm always looking for something new for him.  Thanks!

Wholly Cat- Thanks for your comments.  I hear you loud and clear about the kibble.  I'll check out those links.  But, here's my concern, he has lots of hairballs.  He's a shorthair, but he sheds quite a bit, especially in the summer (it gets into the 100's quick here), if I get rid of the grain in the kibbles, is that going to cause him more hairballs.  I give him some hairball goo with his meals, which seems to help, and he likes it- he'll eat it off the plate, but I'm really concerned for our carpet (and you know cat's physically can't puke on hard flooring).  I've also tried getting some of that grass from Petco, but I kindof think that just makes him puke easier...isn't that what cat's do, go outside and eat grass so they can puke up hairballs?  He's an indoor cat only (his previous owner declawed him), so he can't go outside and eat the grass.  But I kindof think that's just Petco's way of getting a little extra $$, because it doesn't help the hairballs pass.  That's interesting about the water- I've never noticed that, but I do notice that if I give him a runny wet food, he always slops up the juice before he starts in on the meat.  We actually buy the small cans, so we wouldn't have to worry about rewarming it, but I just am concerned that since he's already starting to get a little tummy, is two cans going to be too much for him?  Ie is he going to become overweight?  I saw this 30 something pound cat and thought that his owners should be put in jail.  I don't want my cat dying prematurely because I feed him every time he whines (people do this a LOT with their dogs too).  As for your questions, I think I've answered most of them.  I couldn't tell you what dry food I'm feeding him.  I'm sorry, I don't usually have just one.  He is very picky about the dry food.  I found one that he really liked, with softer centers I guess, but it's nothing super wonderful or expensive.  I found it at Big Lots and just tried it.  I could get him the $10 bag or the $2 bag and it could make no difference.  I'll look into that condition.  Thanks for the link.  The last time I took him to the vet, last year, he checked out normal.  Please don't be disturbed, my post may have been short and to the point, but it was also humorous, because if I can't laugh about this, I really would go insane, and he wouldn't be around.  All that I've gone through for him, any sane person would've already had him put down.  Too many regular $600, $300, $200 vet bills.  To give him to someone else or another shelter would essentially be killing him, and I can't stand that thought.  Thanks for your suggestions.

For those of you that had good suggestions, Thanks!  For the rest of you, after reading the WHOLE story (the story that I was trying to save you the time by not telling), you may want to rethink your quick assumptions and responses.  And don't act like you didn't read this because of the title.  Mission accomplished-got some good suggestions.

 

[gloriajh]

Gloria- Thanks for your suggestions.  Yes, Ploofka is fixed.  I agree feeding them meat is the best way to go.  I've tried to buy the most meat-filled cat foods...at least my receipts tell me so $$.  Sometimes I give him lunch meat or tuna from the can, which he usually likes. (of course I worry about giving him the tuna with the mercury in it, so it's rare).  Thanks for the links...I'll take the tips and try and find a more protein-based dry food that I can leave out.  He actually is a very social kitty, and I think he likes being around other cats, but we had another cat (a girl), and with them both in our apartment one of them was marking.  So we had to give her to my parents.  I worry about adding another cat to the mix, because one day I came in and Ploofka was squatting around our bath mat ready to do his business...I thought she was marking, but when I saw that I started to think that it could've been him the whole time!  Anyway, thanks for your suggestions!

Social - I meant social as in human contact - ours will follow us into any room they can and settle in just to be near us. 

Tuna - or any fish has magnesium - magnesium causes crystals that can block the kidneys and/or bladder - so, it's not just the mercury I'd be concerned about.  I haven't read this whole article, but if you're interested ... http://www.peteducation.com/article.cfm?c=1+2142&aid=2729

I find if someone is marking - it's usually the male, so your little girl may have gotten a bad rap.  

Guess you have a lot of reading assignments, huh!  Give your 10-year old guy a hug from me.  

Oh, and just a personal note - try and wipe the negative words from your vocabulary because they tend to be prophetic -- , well (?) something like that ... .  

 

[minka]

The responses got a little long, so I just kinda skimmed through them, but the jist of what I got is:
A. you are feeding him once a day
B. he is not overweight, in fact you want to make sure he eats enough
C. he's old and has almost no teeth


Right away I can tell you why he is begging: you are only feeding him once a day!
There is no way, no how, you will be able to stop the begging unless you feed him more than once a day.
However, I can completely understand that you don't want to associate waking up with feeding time because then if he wakes up at 5, you'll be waking up at 5.
Okay, so what is the solution? One of these! http://www.petsmart.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2751313
They have timers on them, so not only can you set them for any time you want, but your cat will no longer associate you coming in the door, or moving towards the kitchen with getting food!!

I completely understand that you love your cat, pouring oodles of money and love at him to make him well, and wouldnt give him up for the world BUT when at the same time every day he comes running and meow, meow, Meow, Meow, MEOW, MEOW, MEOWWWS all over the place, it can make your head spin. >__

 

[ploofka]

Gloria- Thanks for the response. You're right, I've got a lot of good references to look into.  Thanks for the tip on magnesium.  I wasn't worried about that, just the mercury.  Good to know.  ...can't imagine that it'd be good for humans either...  Anyway, we've suspected that you're right about her getting the bad rap.  She was just the one we always found around the pee, trying to cover it up with the carpet.  It was really miserable.  I don't know what caused them to do it.  Having them separate has helped, but then they don't have each other, and we don't have her.  It was a really hard decision.  Luckily my parents were looking to get another companion after our family cat (Spotty) died a few years ago (he definately used up all of his 9 lives, and maybe some more).  As for the negative words, not completely sure of what you're referring to.  Me talking negative about my cat or the other users trolling on this thread.  Obviously the comments about my cat are sarcastic, I think I've made that very clear, and as I said, if I can't joke about it I'd go insane, and he'd have been put down by now.  As for the other users, they need to not be so serious, read my whole post, and take a joke.  Cats are supposed to make people relax, not have a stick up their... If they're not, you're doing something wrong.  Anyway, thanks for your suggestions.

Minka- You're right on with your assumptions.  Not to mention that he is an indoor cat, because he's declawed.  He's pretty helpless and needy at this point.  But I don't want to feed him too much.  I don't have the same issues I had when I had my other cat- another reason we had to separate them.  As I've mentioned, Ploofka is a grazer, and he'll leave his food for a matter of minutes before he comes back.  During that time my other cat, who is convinced that she's recovering very well from anorexia, will finish her food, then go finish his.  This still happens when we go on vacation and have to send him to my parents.  I was concerned that he wasn't getting enough then, but I'm not so concerned now.  Thanks for that feeder suggestion!  It didn't get very good reviews, but I'll look around and see if I can find one that cats can't open.  Of course, as I said, he is declawed, so he might not be able to.  I guess I could try it out and see.  Either way, I really like the idea that he'll stop associating me doing anything and everything with him eating.  Thanks!

 

[tarasgirl06]

My comment still stands, in all SERIOUSNESS, and yes, I did read your entire comment.  Several times, in fact.  A couple of other posters have stated how I truly feel a little more strongly.  Sarcasm is one thing; abusive, hurtful and IMHO deeply disturbed comments quite another.  If I made that sort of comment about a human child where others could see them, I would fully expect a visit from law enforcement and/or Child Protective Services pretty quickly.  Unfortunately, this society doesn't have laws that protect cats strongly enough; but all 50 U.S. States do have laws on their books, however inadequate, protecting all cats, and I would think that anyone making comments of the sort you posted where others could see/hear them might also reasonably expect some serious concern on the part of others who really love and care for other living beings.  I'll stop now, because I feel my comments probably won't sensitize you to the fact that not only are your comments very hateful to your cat, they are also hateful and hurtful to almost everyone on this website.

 

[whollycat]

Cats, by nature are hunters, and would usually eat small meals of prey many times a day. The reason for this is that this keeps a kitty's naturally acidic digestive "system" running in tip-top shape, which real meat (not kibble) facilitates. Since some human care-givers can not do this for them, most that work outside the home do two meals a a day with maybe an extra feeding close to bedtime. Lisa A. Pierson, DVM (http://www.catinfo.org/), recommends the following: "The average cat should eat 4-6 ounces of canned food per day split between 3-4 meals/day (or just free-fed if they are not overweight [my note: she's talking about canned, not kibble]) but this is just a general guideline.  When determining how much you should be feeding your cat once transitioned to canned food, keep it simple.  Too fat?  Feed less.  Too thin?  Feed more."

For example: All three of my kitties eat varying amounts of food per day (I work from home). Abby, my soon-to-be 16-year-old boy (13-14lb kitty; not overweight anymore since we switched to raw almost seven years ago when he tipped the scale at 18lbs+) eats around 6 ounces of raw a day. Maxie is a Maine Coon (7-1/2yrs old) and quite large and is not overweight at close to 20lbs, so at 4-6 ounces of raw, he would be starving--he eats at least double that of an "average" cat--always has, even as a kitten, and is very muscular with no fat on him. Izzy is small (6lbs and will be 5yrs old this year), so she eats around 4oz of raw total per day--Izzy tends to be a bit overweight for her size, but I am working on her "feral" way of approaching food; it's like she thinks she's never going to get another meal...ever, so she chows down daintily, but with gusto.

Abby and Izzy eat three times a day with the last being a smaller meal late at night before bed. Maxie eats 4-6 times a day, with the last smaller meal, with the other two, before bed.

I will say that a raw diet is more bio-available, so if feeding canned you may need to adjust for that--if my kitties were on canned food, besides being in the poor house, I would have to up the amount I currently feed by at least 1/3.

So the moral of the above story

: Figure from what an average cat (approximately 10lbs) would eat and adjust to what would be ideal for your kitty, as they are all unique.

All that being said, here is a great cat feeder: http://www.fancypaws.com/8daypetfeeder.html which is highly recommended and used by members of another kitty group I'm a member of. Excerpt: "This feeder also has a digital timer so that you can set the exact time you wish to feed the pet every day, or 2 times/day, or 3 times/day or up to 8 times/day. This cannot be done in a 7 day feeder or 6 day feeder or a 5 day feeder. The 8 Day Feeder is the only one of its kind."

The feeder above would allow you to time his meals while you're gone with smaller meals interspersed throughout the day. Once you find your sweet spot that works for Ploofka with the timed feedings, you might be able to get your sanity back.

ETA:

Cats are supposed to make people relax, not have a stick up their... If they're not, you're doing something wrong.

The first part of this is incorrect: Kitties do NOT have the job of "making people relax" like a good ole massage or a couple Valium. But their behavior IS trying to communicate that something is wrong and needs fixing. Also, a little unsolicited advice: if you're being sarcastic of injecting humor, please use the emoticons to convey this. Written text is not like spoken words, and you come across as pretty darn uncaring for Ploofka's predicament, e.g. a couple of comments about "putting him down." 

 

[kittylover23]

I read your entire post as well, and sarcastic or not, it was quite disturbing for someone who loves their cat to call it a "whiny pussy". These sound like hateful comments to me, whether they are meant as a joke or not. I'm not trying to condemn you. I just didn't think it was appropriate to make jokes like this on a cat lover's website.

 

[sivyaleah]

Using the word "pussy" alone, got me.

Very unacceptable on a forum where people are known for being kind and helpful to each other under nearly every possible circumstance.  In fact, out of all the forums I visit I find this one to be most polite overall.  It's just shocking to see someone post something such as this here and I'd hope that the OP thinks twice before doing so again.

 

[just mike]

The responses got a little long, so I just kinda skimmed through them, but the jist of what I got is:
A. you are feeding him once a day
B. he is not overweight, in fact you want to make sure he eats enough
C. he's old and has almost no teeth
Right away I can tell you why he is begging: you are only feeding him once a day!
There is no way, no how, you will be able to stop the begging unless you feed him more than once a day.
However, I can completely understand that you don't want to associate waking up with feeding time because then if he wakes up at 5, you'll be waking up at 5.
Okay, so what is the solution? One of these!

http://www.petsmart.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2751313
They have timers on them, so not only can you set them for any time you want, but your cat will no longer associate you coming in the door, or moving towards the kitchen with getting food!!

I completely understand that you love your cat, pouring oodles of money and love at him to make him well, and wouldnt give him up for the world BUT when at the same time every day he comes running and meow, meow, Meow, Meow, MEOW, MEOW, MEOWWWS all over the place, it can make your head spin. >__<

Well, so far I've gotten down to here in this thread and Minka I think your assessment is right on and it is about what I got out of the OP.  You know I free feed mine their kibble but Gawd forbid if I miss one of their beloved wet meals.  They wait for the wet meal like man eaters and I'd better deliver right on time or else  

I think more meals might very well help the situation.  Mine get their wet twice a day and usually they get their second wet feeding very soon after I get home in the afternoons.  We have a routine and in my household it works for us.