I Don’t Know How To Deal Of The Passing Of My Cat

[Rebecca bastholm]

A few days ago I had to have my cat put to sleep I am struggling to talk to people on how I am truly feeling. I miss him like cry I miss how I would lay in bed with my fiancé and he would be in the middle of us getting all the loves that he could get.
My house is very silent now he passed life seams very hard. When I was having a bad day he was always there picking me up. He always knew how to put a smile on my face. He meant the world to me and my heart is truly broken. I don’t know how to handle his loss

 

[Nancy Ninetails]

I am so sorry for you loss. It is sad fact of life that we usually outlive our beloved pets. Know that it is alright to grieve. He was a part of your family and don't let anyone tell you "he was just a cat" or make you feel as if you shouldn't grieve for him.

 

[Rebecca bastholm]

I have had “he just a cat”
The thing that hurts me the most he was only a baby I feel like he should still be here and should be getting loves and hugs from us.
I ain’t a one to show how I truly care as I find it really hard but not knowing how to feel is making it the worst I just want him home and with me as I suffer with panic attacks and he always stayed with me till I calmed down and he always made me feel better afterwards never left my side

 

[Nancy Ninetails]

He was your baby and there is no proper way to feel. I am currently on vigil with a very ill 5 month old and am in tears fearing if he'll make it. We love them and we grieve when we lose them. As it should be, no matter how others who don't understand our bond may think.

Give yourself time to grieve and perhaps in time, you can give all that love to another cat/kitten who needs you, as you need them. For me, that is how I honor the ones I've lost. I never forget them, they always hold a place in my heart but I help another in need in their remembrance.

 

[JamesCalifornia]

~ I think many of us know how you feel. We get very attached to out little friends . I believe this is part of a healthy personality. Sometimes they are with us for a very long time , or a very short time. While here they know they are wanted and cared for and have a happy life .
I think the idea of getting another pet is a good one. We are good for them , and they are good for us ! Rescue a stray or perhaps visit a shelter and save a kitty that nobody wants .
You'll be OK but it takes time . If you're alone vist here or try one of the psychology web sites . They can help sometimes .
Take care ...

 

[les26]

You have come to the right place, we understand.....

It is one of the most horrible things that we go through in life, losing a pet who is so close to us, that is IF you are very attached to them and not a person who has a pet but as soon as it passes just moves on heartlessly to another because "it was just a cat or dog", but if you truly had the special bond that we all do here and it sounds like you did it will break your heart, but with time, love, patience and people who understand you will be able to show love and compassion to another kitty in need. And if you suffer from panic attacks, the stress and grief of this can cause them and/or make things worse. After Sebastian died in my arms almost 2 years ago a friend who works at the local health food store told me about Holy Basil which helps your body and mind deal with stress but doesn't make you feel drugged or out of it, and I took it and it did help and I take some every so often just to help deal with life, but when we lose a pet the grief can play many games both mentally and physically, so take care of your self and take time out to stay healthy. Sometimes, bad things like this just happen, they pass at young ages sometimes and we'll never know why, but as someone once told me "it is better to have had a good short life than a long bad one", so in that time he knew he was loved, and he loved you. You will feel better in time but it takes a long time, visit here and talk often as these people are wonderful, just let your feelings out, if you want to cry do it, if you want to be sad do it, if you want to be mad do it, if you want to laugh at some good memory of him do it, let it out, holding it in only makes it worse and delays the healing process, we all know how badly it hurts, so bad that you too feel like you will die and don't care if you do, but you will get better, and hopefully take another one in who needs a good home when you are ready.

I hope that your heart heals a bit more each day, Lord Bless you.....

 

[Kitty Mommy]

I'm so sorry you had to put your cat to sleep. It is such a hard decision to make. You did what you thought was best and I know it hurts. It does eventually get better. It helped me to write my cat's life story after I lost my Tiger last month. I hope your heart can start to heal soon.

 

[di and bob]

Your feelings are all perfectly normal. Afterall, your heart doesn't know the difference between human and feline, it just knows it is broken and hurt. There are always feelings of guilt involved, and we go over and over all the things we should have done different. The emptiness in your home is overwhelming at first, time is the only thing that helps us adjust to no longer having them in our lives. Surrounding yourself with people who understand, like on this site, helps to let a little of the pain escape, sharing your burden makes it a little lighter to bear. You are amongst friends here, we all know the pain of losing someone we love so much.
Over time, you developed a bond with that sweet little one. He will never truly be gone from your life because love is spiritual. It will never fail you like the frail physical body. It can never be taken from you. Yes he is gone from your life, but you will always have your precious memories to comfort you, and the legacy he left for you, how to open your heart to another.
It DOES help to have the distraction of another little one who so desperately wants to know love, it's not being disloyal to allow another into your heart, in fact it is an honor in their name. You will learn to love a new love like a mother does that has several children, each one unique and precious for their own individuality. You can't dwell on the end of your little boy, I know form experience, it brings nothing but heartache and tears. Of course you feel heartbroken right now, you feel lost and that you will never love again. That is perfectly normal. But in time you will learn a new life's order for yourself, and your little one will always be near. His new journey will always parallel yours for eternity. In the meantime, do good in his name. It will help you feel a little better about yourself. Donate cat food and litter to your local shelter or pantry. Pay for a little one's adoption so they may find a home quicker, I do this several times a year in my Chrissy's name. It helps to keep busy, to do something to stop the helpless feelings. It is something you can control.
My heart goes out to you, I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers, please come here as often as you need to, and it does help to offer help to the others who need comforting right now too. You are not alone in your grief. Take care.......RIP sweet boy, you will never be forgotten and will always be held in a loving heart. May God bless and keep you until you meet again!

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Little One, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

I am so sorry that you lost your baby. And here, there is no such thing as "just a cat." We know that cats can, and usually do, become the purring heart of our homes. You will grieve until you don't any more, and no one has the right to tell you when that is. I will say this, I have realized over the past 60 some-odd years that love never dies. It does change form. That love is still with us, but OH, how we miss the physical presence. My heart goes out to you.

 

[bayadere]

I'm so sorry this happened. I'm also finding it difficult dealing with the passing of my cat just a week ago. I just want to curl up in my bed with my cat purring noisily by my side.

I just try and get through the days by remembering all the good times we had, all his funny little ways. I just try and remember and celebrate his life rather than dwell on his death. I hope this helps even just a little.

 

[adventuregirl]

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I also lost my kitty a couple of weeks ago. It’s really hard especially when your kitty is such a great helper for our emotions. I know it’s hard. Since my cat passed away in my “terrible week” - the week my dad died two years ago and also the week of my dads birthday- my husband told me to go to the humane society the next day, to just look and cuddle cats. I ended up finding a new kitty named Oscar who was having a hard time getting adopted because he was grumpy and didn’t like kids or other pets. They said he wasn’t friendly and that he was a biter... anyway the second he was in my arms he was purring away. I took it as a sign and adopted him on the spot. He is completely different than my cat I just lost, and even though I miss her very much Oscar has helped me get over the loss so much. Since he is a completely different cat -color, size personality … I don’t feel like I am replacing my little Mini, I just feel like he is something different. I also feel like Mini understands and that I need a cat in my life. So anyway it might feel like to soon, but if your house feels empty opening your heart to a new cat might help... at the very least volunteering at a shelter might help sometimes cuddling a cat is the best therapy.

 

[EggSandwich]

My condolences.

Yes, we do know how you feel. You should give yourself some times. It doesn't matter how small or insignificant your little one may seem to someone else; your kitty was part of the family. That is enough justification right there.
You should remember to give yourself time. As much as you need.
-
When you feel ready, go ahead and do little things. Start slow. Do something small that is productive each day. Wash the dishes, etc. Try to keep your mind off of the sadness and the empty, hollow feeling.
Consider getting another cat. Go to your local place where you can adopt pets, and look around. Cuddle cats. You don't even have to leave with one, but it will make you feel better to spend some time with them.
Adopting another cat can help you a lot more than you may first anticipate.

 

[Rebecca bastholm]

~ I think many of us know how you feel. We get very attached to out little friends . I believe this is part of a healthy personality. Sometimes they are with us for a very long time , or a very short time. While here they know they are wanted and cared for and have a happy life .
I think the idea of getting another pet is a good one. We are good for them , and they are good for us ! Rescue a stray or perhaps visit a shelter and save a kitty that nobody wants .
You'll be OK but it takes time . If you're alone vist here or try one of the psychology web sites . They can help sometimes .
Take care ...

Hey thank you for you kind words we are looking into it but we just don’t feel right getting a new pet I know we will when the time feels right I still look at his pictures and nothing seem to be working... I know it’s going to take time
But I thank you all for your kind words

 

[LTS3]

There are resources for grieving pet owners that you may find helpful: Pet Loss Support Hotline: Resources for Grieving

Feel free to post here on TCS as well

Don't let anyone push you to get a new pet if you don't feel ready for one. I know people who got a new pet right away, like days later, and they didn't even seem fazed by the loss of the previous pet. When my previous cat died, it was an entire year to the day before I brought home a new cat. Peple kept asking me almost right away when I was going to get another cat, even being super pushy about it, but I wasn't ready. I just ignored them. If you're not ready for a pet until years from now, it's perfectly ok

 

[tessie7]

Rebecca bastholm I am with you. My beauty went to sleep yesterday, and I am truly heartbroken with grief. My house is empty, and I keep expecting to see her in her favorite spots. I know this is all normal to feel, but it's very hard right now and I can't believe the amount of tears that continues to roll out of my eyes.

 

[bayadere]

Rebecca bastholm I am with you. My beauty went to sleep yesterday, and I am truly heartbroken with grief. My house is empty, and I keep expecting to see her in her favorite spots. I know this is all normal to feel, but it's very hard right now and I can't believe the amount of tears that continues to roll out of my eyes.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sure your darling cat had a wonderful life and felt so so loved by you. Cherish and remember all the good times xx

 

[Purr-fect]

Many of us here have also lost our beloved pets. I promise you time will help lessen the pain you are feeling now. There will be better days ahead for you.

Take an hour at a time. Hours will become days and time will help heal.

Dont under estimate the stress this can take on you. Look after yourself, rest, eat well, exercise, stay active.

It will get better.

 

[Mylittlepony]

A few days ago I had to have my cat put to sleep I am struggling to talk to people on how I am truly feeling. I miss him like cry I miss how I would lay in bed with my fiancé and he would be in the middle of us getting all the loves that he could get.
My house is very silent now he passed life seams very hard. When I was having a bad day he was always there picking me up. He always knew how to put a smile on my face. He meant the world to me and my heart is truly broken. I don’t know how to handle his loss