How to stop feeling guilty?

[Meowmee]

Hi Meowmee ! I actually just have the two cats. I know Maui needs some cat-discipline... I wish Coffee would just give her one good wallop over the head to show her that she isn't a toy! (I get their nails trimmed regularly, don't worry)

Ok maybe it was someone else with the other cats It would be good actually if she would do that. It is totally normal- Byron did that with Angie when she was a crazy kitten, numerous times and eventually she stopped constantly jumping on him. I would def try the separation and re intro

 

[walli]

Yeah try not to do the guilt I have a worst situation than you.
We all do the best we can with cats that are so unpredictable sometimes!
Just know you guys are doing great things and try to relax, they have a good home
otherwise you wouldn't care so much.
Just chill it will be good for the cats too!
I have to remind myself of this too!

 

[reba]

This is just my opinion, hope it’s not controversial, but here’s the story. After adopting a litter of stray kittens, eventually trapped and got their father into the house who decided to pull the nonsense that you describe.

How did I stop it? Well Dad’s world pretty much caved in every time he showed aggression. Not that I ever hit him, but I would hold him on his side and yell at him for a good 30 seconds, followed by the cold shoulder. That was when I caught him doing things like cornering his daughter in the cat carrier. If I even saw a hint of the wheels turning he would hear “Don’t you even consider...”

Now he‘s a pretty smart cookie which I’m sure helped, but after a few weeks the behavior stopped. He’s not even the dominant cat in the house now. And he could be - he’s double the size of the other three.

 

[cataholic07]

Holding a cat down and yelling at the cat is NEVER the answer. There are lots of reasons why cats may be best friends and can get into fights or hissy fits. You don't want your cats to be scared of you and sometimes it can cause peeing issues due to stress.

-Unfixed cats tend to be extremely territorial and can fight with each other more often. That's why fixing your cats is extremely important.
-Not enough resources. You should always ensure you have a lot of cat trees, litter boxes and toys for your cats so they don't have to share.
-Jealously, cats do get very jealous so you want to ensure you give all cats the same amount of affection each day. If a cat isn't cuddly or doesn't like being bushed do something else they love to do, the same time every day if possible. Fynn isn't a fan of being brushed or cuddled with but he loves to be carried around so I do that for him. Jetty loves to be brushed, and Ceriah loves to play or carried.
-Play aggression is common in young kitties, they wanna play and they can get extremely rough during play which can lead to fights. Ceriah and Jetty play really well together, as does Fynn and Jetty. But if Fynn tries to play with Ceriah she will hiss and growl as well he is a big boy and she's only 4 months old. We make a loud sound and he usually stops then I bring out the wand toy to burn off some energy.
-Illness or injury can make some cats aggressive.

And some cats are never best friends but they learn to coexist which is fine as long as they are happy. It's like step kids, sometimes they don't love each other but they learn to like each other without killing each other lol. And that's ok to! I'd recommend checking out books by Pam Johnson Bennet, she has loads of great cat knowledge and a website with a ton of great blogs.

 

[reba]

Yelling is NEVER the answer if your temper has gotten the best of you (with animals or people), but yelling (or a firm talking to whatever you want to call it) worked in this case. '

And the only peeing issues he has is demanding to be picked up and rocked every time I pee in the middle of the night. Drives me crazy but it's so cute I can't not humor him.