Goodbye Sweet Frankie

[deepsearch]

Frankie passed on Saturday. It was unexpected, he became so sick. Frankie was only about two years old, at most. He wasn't exactly my cat, but he was a cat who I fed outside when he was very young until he was socialized enough to be brought indoors. I worried about him a lot when he was an outdoor cat and I knew he needed some vet care after he developed a swollen, squinty eye. He adjusted to being an indoor cat easily and was very loving and craved attention and got along with other cats just fine. My mom ended up adopting him after losing her little FeLV+ cat, Tommy. We found out Frankie had FIV when we got him to the vet, but his health seemed good once his eye issue cleared up...

We didn't know that he'd developed FIP and while my mom and I went on a week-long trip he deteriorated. It's everyone's worst fear that while they're away their cat will get sick and I'm still struggling to accept what happened. A cat sitter came to care for Frankie and two other cats twice a day, but apparently, she didn't realize that Frankie was in a bad way. When I last saw him the day we got back from our trip his eyes were watery and he looked like he didn't feel well at all. My mom took him to the vet the next morning, but his condition declined rapidly. The vet drained fluid from his abdomen, but he didn't improve. So the decision was made to let him go, as he wasn't going to get better.

My mom was with him when he passed. I regret that I wasn't there to see him one last time. When I saw him the day before, I had assumed he had an eye infection or some virus that was treatable. I hadn't expected to get a call from my mom saying he was so sick that letting him go was the kindest thing to do for him. I could have gone to see him, but it would have taken me about half an hour or so to drive to the emergency vet to be with him. By that time he was on oxygen and was struggling to breathe. I didn't want him to suffer waiting on me. And I didn't want to watch him die... I asked my mom to say goodbye for me, but I think I was in shock at the time. I just couldn't process it. I know he was with someone who loved him and he spent more time with my mother than with me, but I still regret that I wasn't there. I don't even know if he would have been aware of my presence, as sick as he was, but I was the one who took care of him while he lived outside and he became attached to me before anyone else.

Overall I'm just at a loss. I wish I'd been able to spend more time with him. After my mom took him in I had hoped he'd live a long, happy life and I'd get to see him often. I'd figured if my mom was unable to take care of him anymore, I'd become his guardian. I feel terrible that Frankie was alone most of the time this past week. I wish I could have been there for him. I wish the cat sitter had noticed that he wasn't doing well. I wish that we'd known he had FIP sooner. I know it's a devastating illness, but I just wish there was more that we could've done for him. And I feel so bad for my mom because she decided to adopt Frankie after losing Tommy last December... And her cat Edward won't be with us for much longer, either, as he has nasal cancer... Losing Frankie so suddenly is just crushing.

I'm sorry, Frankie. I wasn't ready to say goodbye. I knew you only for a little while, but I won't forget you.

 

[FeebysOwner]

There is no easy ending - ever; there will be regrets - always. It is so easy to fall into looking back and wishing differently even when you know you cannot do one thing to change any of that.

I am pretty sure that Frankie would rather have you bless/celebrate the time he spent with you and you with him than to concentrate on his passing. Your memories of him are much more enduring, cherished, and everlasting than those last few moments, despite his short life. Please give your mom a hug from us too.

That pic of Frankie is precious! RIP little Frankie.

 

[Margot Lane]

Think if Frankie hadn’t been socialized enough to come in out of the cold! You made his brief life in this world warmer and much happier. You put a maximum of quality into a minimum of quantity, and him vice versa! Honestly all we ever can do IS to seize the day, if we are lucky enough to be owned by a cat! Thank you for taking care of him.

 

[Mia6]

I am so very sorry about your loss. Frankie is very beautiful!!!

 

[Norachan]

I'm so sorry. He was a beautiful boy. I know he was only with you for a short time, but for Frankie those few years were so much better because of you and your mum. You were his everything. You saved him and thanks to you he was able to live in a nice home and be with the people who loved him when he passed.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Frankie, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someones' heart forever.

The wonderful thing about cats is that they are so totally living in Zentime. Every moment is their "forever," and for Frankie, that meant that forever, he was a beloved cat, and that forever, his family was with him, and he was not alone. And now, from his new home in That Place Where All Things Are Known, Frankie blesses you and your mom for your love for him, and your care for him. He knows that you would never have left him had you been able to know he was ill, and most importantly, he sends his love, translated and purified into Love, back to you both, to walk beside you down through all of your days. Because Love abides. Always, forever, Love abides.

 

[di and bob]

He knew you cared and loved him and he carried that love in his soul. This was beyond anything you could have controlled, the two years he had in your and your mom's care were the happiest in his life. He lived longer than he would have and is grateful for it.
Try to remember the good times, do not dwell on his end. All those should haves could haves change nothing. It only brings sadness and that is the last thing he wants. Go forward into the future and live it as you would have wanted for him if you were the first to go, he wants no less.
He gave you something precious in this world, a cat's love. Hold it close and know it is eternal. He will forever be as close as your thoughts and prayers.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your mom, he is at peace because of your love.....RIP sweet Frankie. You will be dearly missed, you will always have a secure place in loving hearts. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[Antonio65]

Frankie was clearly much loved, that photo says it all, he couldn't have asked for more, though his life with you was short.

You weren't there with Frankie, but I am sure he thought of you while he was going to reach the Rainbow Bridge, he thought of you and the good you did for him. This is the treasure he brought up there with him.

RIP Frankie!

 

[deepsearch]

Thank you all for your kind words. This past week was difficult. I still can't really believe that I won't ever see him again... I will always wish that I could've spent more time with Frankie before he passed and I wish that he could've gotten the care he needed sooner.

But I am so thankful that Frankie trusted us enough to become a member of the family and that I got to love him and know him. I am grateful that he was able to have a peaceful passing and that he wasn't alone. I'll always hold onto the moments that we had. He was a very special little man and he will always be missed.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Thank you so much for those pics! Frankie will forever be in your heart and cherished for so long as you live. You will always miss him, but regrets will eventually be overcome with the gratitude of having been a part of his life, and he yours. That is all any of us can expect - or hope for - with any living being. We know they will be gone, or maybe we will be before them - it is all about the time we share while we are 'here' that counts the most.