- Joined
- Feb 23, 2017
- Messages
- 121
- Purraise
- 11
Hi! I'm new here to this forum, and also new to having a cat - a month and a half ago I got a cat from my local shelter. Well, we had a cat when I was young, but that's a lot of years ago. So, after reading up on cats and aquiring some info, I'm very excited and looking forward to a new companion. Turns out though, the cat is... something is wrong. I was told she was a little shy, but there's more to it than that. I ask them specifically if something has happened to the cat, has she been exposed to any trauma, feral cat, and so on. Than they say she has been a feral cat for a month before they got her. So I google and read and get into this, and I'm starting to realize that I'm in for quite a challenge - without having known or accepted it. I'm pretty mad at the shelter for not telling me right away. They said she likes to talk... no, she doesn't. She talks mostly when she's stressed out or scared. That's why she was meowing when I approached her at the shelter. And she shivered when I touched her (she was inside a cage when I was there). I didn't know what to make of this, and didn't think it was that big a deal since she didn't hiss or scratch or bite or anything like that. So... I've had her for a month and a half now, and I really don't have the patience for this... I'm trying the best that I can, but I would really like to have known what I've bargained for. Well, she's a little better know than she was. I can play with her, feed her off my hand (depends on where we are, where I'm standing, what mood she's in?), and she walks around the house. Well, as long as I don't walk too... it's a bad apartment like that, a lot of small rooms and not a lot of space, so she runs off a lot when I'm nearby. She can lay in the sofa when I do, as long as I keep my distance. But I',m not allowed to pet her. She scares off and moves away. She also shivers, as I said... a friend of mine said that's probably a sign that she has been traumatized. I don't know. All I know is that she's been in the shelter since she was one month old, and she was feral prior to that. "She had a reasonably tame mother", the people at the shelter said. Well, been feral and than at the shelter until I picked her up, she's obviously never had a home. So... I really don't understand why they didn't tell me. I'm not a good selection when it comes to taming a feral cat... she's almost ten months now, so she's been in the shelter for some months, but with a lot of people in and out, a lot of cats in and out... she's not tame. She's not aggressive though... she has hissed at my three times, all of them I'm pretty sure because she felt cornered. She doesn't hiss anymore.
So... I guess maybe I'm lucky in that she's half-feral from what I understand... I know it could've been a lot worse. But I really want her to be safe and be able to pet her and lie next to her and... not seeing her run away scared all the time when our paths cross when we walk about the apartment. I'm not a very patience person as I've said, so I'm having a heard time not reaching out and petting her. And honestly don't know wether to do so or not. She lays on her side exposing her belly when we play, after a while (I play with one of those fishing rods with a "bird" on), or when she's feeling playful. And she closes her eyes when she lay near me, like in the other corner of my couch or so. She sniffs my hand, but that's it. Recently trying to do the closed fist... "bump" or what it's called. She sniffs that too, but yeah. I actually got to pet her a little bit a week ago when she was (almost) sleeping, and I laid close to her, and very gently touched her paw (on top of it), and very gently touched underneath her chin. After that, nothing though. Frustrating, and a little confusing.
Should I just be laid-back and let her make the first move, or should I push a little? She seems to be so "ready" in one way... like she just don't exactly know how to be affectionate (she doesn't rub on any of my stuff - doesn't give off any scent). Like she wants to, but is afraid. And I've heard about some people pushing a little forward. And I've also heard that the cat should always take the initiative.
Any suggestions/feedback?
So... I guess maybe I'm lucky in that she's half-feral from what I understand... I know it could've been a lot worse. But I really want her to be safe and be able to pet her and lie next to her and... not seeing her run away scared all the time when our paths cross when we walk about the apartment. I'm not a very patience person as I've said, so I'm having a heard time not reaching out and petting her. And honestly don't know wether to do so or not. She lays on her side exposing her belly when we play, after a while (I play with one of those fishing rods with a "bird" on), or when she's feeling playful. And she closes her eyes when she lay near me, like in the other corner of my couch or so. She sniffs my hand, but that's it. Recently trying to do the closed fist... "bump" or what it's called. She sniffs that too, but yeah. I actually got to pet her a little bit a week ago when she was (almost) sleeping, and I laid close to her, and very gently touched her paw (on top of it), and very gently touched underneath her chin. After that, nothing though. Frustrating, and a little confusing.
Should I just be laid-back and let her make the first move, or should I push a little? She seems to be so "ready" in one way... like she just don't exactly know how to be affectionate (she doesn't rub on any of my stuff - doesn't give off any scent). Like she wants to, but is afraid. And I've heard about some people pushing a little forward. And I've also heard that the cat should always take the initiative.
Any suggestions/feedback?