Cat Intro Going Really Badly

[Natashan]

Thank you!
Am covered in plasters at the moment squeaky has a bitey streak.

Have added a photo of dinner time. Both the madams are unamused.

 

[ArtNJ]

Both cats screaming and lunging is...a depressingly difficult one. Just trying to be real, don't want to be all rainbows and sunshine when your having a difficult time.

I think you said you can't do the baby gates, so maybe you need to try the carrier approach. The idea is one cat goes in the carrier in a room with the other, and they get used to being in each others presence while not attacking. I don't love the idea of it at all, baby gates is clearly better, because just being in the carrier can be stressful for many cats, but its worked for some. Jackson Galaxy supposedly has an a method where you crack a door and secure it so it can't open further -- sounds tricky to set-up, but that might be something to think about. I do think you need one of these methods, because screaming and lunging is not a good place.

 

[Natashan]

No it’s not

It’s leaving me wondering if there’s any hope at all....

I’ve been using the playpen covered, as in the picture above. But Pittan attacks it. No yowling but spitting.
She lunges, from what I’ve guessed, when squeaks makes unwavering eye contact. Which she does when she sees Pittan. It’s weird though....squeaks chirps at Pittan, like she does when she sees a bird outside. But then the growling starts and it all goes to pot.
Will try the two door stops and the carrier and playpen... this has to end eventually. I know I’m close to the end of me!

 

[ArtNJ]

How long have you been trying the playpen method?

 

[Natashan]

This is the 3rd time I’m doing it this time round. Last intro I did I did it more often and longer periods, also uncovered. And Pittan wouldn’t really attack it. She’d just huff, snort and avoid. Occasionally she’d yell but stopped when I shushed her or redirected her attention.
Now she hears it and growls then jumps/whacks it as she can hear squeaky eating. I’m trying it slower this time. It’s just weird as she’s fine when I was giving treats with both of them face to face, half a foot away from each other.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Well...not good, but I did watch the videos, and the fact that Pittan can be distracted during an episode, and that the mutual treat time is fairly calm does give me some hope, but this is definitely a long-term process.

 

[Natashan]

So this morning, during breakfast, I decided to keep squeaks in the play pen and Pittan free.
She growled the whole time squeaks was eating, circled the playpen and came right up to it, growling. I moved the tent into the bedroom as squeaks had wolfed down her food and would no longer be distracted. But Pittan actually followed and then, while screeching, attacked squeaks through the playpen.
No harm done to either cat.
But I’m starting to give up hope

 

[ArtNJ]

I focused in on your use of the words "during breakfast" -- i.e. short duration session. Possibly you can exhaust the aggression with longer times; that seems to work sometimes. If there is no actual contact from the attempted violence, perhaps you can leave the playpen out all day then switch cats the next day, or maybe waiting several days. I'm not sure it will work, but it does seem like being all riled up takes energy and if no contact actually happens, its hard to sustain. Granted I've seen exhausting the aggression work only with growling and hissing, as I've not actually used anything like a playpen myself. And you might only have time to try this on a weekend since leaving the playpen out while your not there is probably too risky.

 

[Natashan]

I had NO idea that was a possibility.
I think I’ll try that. The slow and steady approach isn’t helping much and today Pittan is refusing to speak to me.
Pittan is just so difficult! Bless her though, she is my baby. A mean one! It has to be the undersocialisation as I got her so young.

 

[ArtNJ]

It is definitely something that works with mere growling and hissing. I've had it work, and others have too. If no one is being hurt, then given enough *time*, the bothered cat(s) settle down and then time in proximity with nothing bad happening seems to help. It seems like short sessions don't do much, because they never settle down and there is no time they are together without spewing hate. I can't promise that it will translate to your situation, but its worth a try. Good luck!

 

[Natashan]

Would it work if she even if she goes for the kitten if she’s in the play pen? Or is that just adding more stress.

Hopefully it will work . Thanks for the luck! Much needed

 

[walli]

I think you are doing really well, just the fact that they will eat treats together says a lot!

 

[Natashan]

Thanks I really appreciate the positivity! Just keeping fingers crossed the moment and being super hopeful it’ll work out sooner rather than later.

 

[Natashan]

This taken just now.
Maybe there IS hope yet!
Pittan did a long growly walk but then plopped herself down in full view of squeaks (trapped in the playpen). I suppose to keep an eye on her.

Not sure if resignation or if exhaustion from not eating her dinner or brekkie properly as she was to distraught and sulky.
Little madam.

 

[walli]

Hey! that is great!!
try not to be stressed in front of them, they sense it and it stresses them out!

 

[Natashan]

Hi all!

So it’s been a work in progress. Not much of a difference but I have had both cats out at the same time for short spells. Usually when one is sleeping and making sure that squeaks is on a lead.
Someone always manages to start something however. Silly things.
I’ve added another video of this morning during brekkie. Let me know what your thoughts are

Oh, and as for the music playing in the background, I’m trying to keep the kitty calming music on most of the day.

 

[rubysmama]

I watched the video, but unfortunately with my complete lack of experience with aggressive cats, I don't really have an opinion. Or at least not a helpful one.

Beautiful cats, though. I hope in time they'll agree to peacefully co-exist.

 

[Natashan]

Beautiful cats, though. I hope in time they'll agree to peacefully co-exist.

Thank you! Any help is better than none.

They’re Arabian Maus. Very, very vocal and expressive. They’re everywhere here in the Middle East and such fun cats. My husband and I are desperate for them to get along better.

 

[Kflowers]

the fact that the kitten keeps eating and ignores the adult's swearing, says the kitten isn't afraid. They know the playpen isn't that sturdy.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

That video was helpful. The BEST time to step in is as soon as one cat focuses on the other. Right around 11-12 seconds into the video we go from "looking" to "focusing." At that point, whenever you see it, try intervening with a wand toy or treat for the one that is focused. Get them distracted. That may help over time.