- Joined
- Jul 21, 2018
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- 129
- Purraise
- 140
This is going to be long but I feel I need to talk about it. Feel free to offer words of encouragement, advice, ask questions, etc. I don't mind but I just need to post about it.
I feel as though I'm a bit exhausted. Almost a year ago I decided to adopt a retired breeder persian who I was told was in good health. When I showed up to adopt her, though, she was very ill. I will not specify where I got the cat or from whom. All other cats there seemed to be in good health, though. Anyway, I took her home because I had already fallen in love with her. I also took her straight to a vet. Then, two vets. She was diagnosed with calicivirus, a spay-site incision infection, and my vet said she was extremely underweight (5lbs). So, we gave her antibiotics, saline nose drops, and urgent care high calorie food. The infection at the spay site went away within weeks and the worst of the calicivirus went away. It was around this time that I was getting up to administer feedings, clean her face, etc. in the middle of the night. Some calicivirus symptoms lingered like tongue ulcers and stuffy nose. She wasn't gaining weight despite the voracious eating and the vet was concerned. I then noticed that she started having diarrhea. It was once a night but then it became 3-5 times a night. We tried limited ingredient food. Nothing. We tried multiple probiotics from the vet thinking it was anti-biotic related. Nothing. Blood work showed dehydration but otherwise good health. Stool sample came back clear. We tried Metro and it helped until the treatment ended. I was getting up in the middle of the night to clean her and then waking up in the morning before work to do the same. Finally, after tons and tons of diagnostics we finally received the IBD diagnosis. We switched her to raw-only food, s.boulardii probiotics, weekly B12 injections from home, and sucralfate liquid to help her intestines heal. It was a really slow recovery and some days were good and some bad. I spent a lot of time crying and worrying. She had to eat multiple small meals a day for good digestion and it would take her forever to eat and she wouldn't eat unless I hand fed her the nuggets of raw food. Over time, things got better. She started eating by herself and at more regular times. The diarrhea stopped. She gained three pounds (!!!!). Her digestive issues have been under control ever since. No diarrhea in about 7 months and I'm super happy. Now she's only on raw food, weekly B12, and s.boulardii for the IBD.
But, then, she started drooling. Not only drooling, it was sometimes blood tinged. This became a care issue too because I had to clean her face multiple times a day and started having to hand feed again. Vet #1 said it might be stomatitis. Vet #2 said not stomatitis but gingivitis. Since she's special needs, they want her to see a specialist. She's scheduled for April. We luckily got her symptoms under control and now she eats well by herself, is still maintaining her 8lb body weight, and is barely drooling (only a little at night). She gets 1-tdc for her gums, an oral gel from the vet, and we have gabapentin for if the pain gets bad (but I've only had to use it two times in the past two months). Based on pictures I've sent, the specialist doubts it's stomatitis and thinks it might resorptive lesions instead. Either way, in April she will see the dental specialist and also the internal medicine specialist for a CT scan of her sinuses, blood work, and a chest ultrasound (minor heart murmur) in case there needs to be surgery to clean or remove teeth.
I love this cat so much it hurts. I wasn't expecting a sick cat. In fact, for the first few weeks although I took excellent care of her I didn't bond with her because I was just so shocked and it was almost like I was on autopilot. But she's the sweetest thing ever and I quickly fell in love despite the difficulties. Even though my cat is doing pretty well now, eating, playing, and washing herself, I worry. I have a demanding career and when I work I just worry. I still wake up at night to check on her because it has become routine even though she doesn't need me to anymore. I feel weird feelings of being happy that she can take care of herself and feeling a bit sad because I had gotten so used to babying her and now I don't have to as much. The most recent time she ate by herself from her bowl instead of being hand fed I cried. I was happy because it meant her pain was less. I was sad because I felt like she didn't need me as much. I feel a bit crazy. I sometimes have nightmares that she's sick again.
Is it possible this is caregiver burnout? I know that sounds silly...caregiver burnout from a cat. But, I do wonder. How do I get into a new routine now that she is starting to feel better? How do I stop worrying and hovering and making myself exhausted?
I feel as though I'm a bit exhausted. Almost a year ago I decided to adopt a retired breeder persian who I was told was in good health. When I showed up to adopt her, though, she was very ill. I will not specify where I got the cat or from whom. All other cats there seemed to be in good health, though. Anyway, I took her home because I had already fallen in love with her. I also took her straight to a vet. Then, two vets. She was diagnosed with calicivirus, a spay-site incision infection, and my vet said she was extremely underweight (5lbs). So, we gave her antibiotics, saline nose drops, and urgent care high calorie food. The infection at the spay site went away within weeks and the worst of the calicivirus went away. It was around this time that I was getting up to administer feedings, clean her face, etc. in the middle of the night. Some calicivirus symptoms lingered like tongue ulcers and stuffy nose. She wasn't gaining weight despite the voracious eating and the vet was concerned. I then noticed that she started having diarrhea. It was once a night but then it became 3-5 times a night. We tried limited ingredient food. Nothing. We tried multiple probiotics from the vet thinking it was anti-biotic related. Nothing. Blood work showed dehydration but otherwise good health. Stool sample came back clear. We tried Metro and it helped until the treatment ended. I was getting up in the middle of the night to clean her and then waking up in the morning before work to do the same. Finally, after tons and tons of diagnostics we finally received the IBD diagnosis. We switched her to raw-only food, s.boulardii probiotics, weekly B12 injections from home, and sucralfate liquid to help her intestines heal. It was a really slow recovery and some days were good and some bad. I spent a lot of time crying and worrying. She had to eat multiple small meals a day for good digestion and it would take her forever to eat and she wouldn't eat unless I hand fed her the nuggets of raw food. Over time, things got better. She started eating by herself and at more regular times. The diarrhea stopped. She gained three pounds (!!!!). Her digestive issues have been under control ever since. No diarrhea in about 7 months and I'm super happy. Now she's only on raw food, weekly B12, and s.boulardii for the IBD.
But, then, she started drooling. Not only drooling, it was sometimes blood tinged. This became a care issue too because I had to clean her face multiple times a day and started having to hand feed again. Vet #1 said it might be stomatitis. Vet #2 said not stomatitis but gingivitis. Since she's special needs, they want her to see a specialist. She's scheduled for April. We luckily got her symptoms under control and now she eats well by herself, is still maintaining her 8lb body weight, and is barely drooling (only a little at night). She gets 1-tdc for her gums, an oral gel from the vet, and we have gabapentin for if the pain gets bad (but I've only had to use it two times in the past two months). Based on pictures I've sent, the specialist doubts it's stomatitis and thinks it might resorptive lesions instead. Either way, in April she will see the dental specialist and also the internal medicine specialist for a CT scan of her sinuses, blood work, and a chest ultrasound (minor heart murmur) in case there needs to be surgery to clean or remove teeth.
I love this cat so much it hurts. I wasn't expecting a sick cat. In fact, for the first few weeks although I took excellent care of her I didn't bond with her because I was just so shocked and it was almost like I was on autopilot. But she's the sweetest thing ever and I quickly fell in love despite the difficulties. Even though my cat is doing pretty well now, eating, playing, and washing herself, I worry. I have a demanding career and when I work I just worry. I still wake up at night to check on her because it has become routine even though she doesn't need me to anymore. I feel weird feelings of being happy that she can take care of herself and feeling a bit sad because I had gotten so used to babying her and now I don't have to as much. The most recent time she ate by herself from her bowl instead of being hand fed I cried. I was happy because it meant her pain was less. I was sad because I felt like she didn't need me as much. I feel a bit crazy. I sometimes have nightmares that she's sick again.
Is it possible this is caregiver burnout? I know that sounds silly...caregiver burnout from a cat. But, I do wonder. How do I get into a new routine now that she is starting to feel better? How do I stop worrying and hovering and making myself exhausted?