Attacked By Outside Cat

[blumarine916]

So this morning, Meimey was demanding to be let out. She was scratching the door and one of her paws was peeking out from below. Meffy went to sniff it and touch it. The paw went back inside. I opened the door a little bit to let them see each other.

Meimey laid there staring back. She didn’t even move when Meffy hissed at her. Just stood her ground like “I am not moving.” Then I closed the door.

Is this improvement?

Also lodge a complaint to the building management about the open stairway doors and stray cats. Hopefully they resolve it. I have made sure the doors to my floor remains shut.

 

[blumarine916]

Update...

Today after work, I opened Meimey’s room and took her out. I put her in front of Meffy. If she hisses, I’ll back off. To my surprise, she licked Meimey’s face!!

I was overjoyed. But Meimey seems to be still scared so she ran to hide. About 20 minutes later, I did the same. Meffy still licked her face again. Then Meimey went to sit at her chair. Meffy followed her which made her nervous. Meimey hissed, probably telling Meffy to go away. Meffy reacted by poofing up then some growling/swatting followed *facepalm*
Back to separation they go.

Looks like Meimey is still not ready to accept Meffy after how she was attacked before. But I’m happy with the progress. I’ll keep waiting.

 

[radarlove413]

Just be careful about rushing things! One thing you definitely don't want to do is put one cat in front of the other like that. You're lucky it went so well for you, but most times cats will interpret it as a sudden invasion of space and attack. If they're better about seeing each other, a safer method is putting down lots of treats on the floor, closer and closer together. That way, they're associating the presence of the other cat with awesome, tasty food. I hope things keep improving!

 

[blumarine916]

So it’s been weeks and my problem is moving to the next stage. How can I be sure they won’t fight again since Meffy still reacts the same way after all that I’ve been doing? I seem to be at a standstill with no way forward.

Now it’s getting hard to keep Meimey in the room. She’s been scratching the door, meowing loudly and even managed to peel out some loose pieces for parquet from the floor. At the same time, I can’t keep Meffy in another room for long either.

At wit’s end now I want to just let them out and see what happens but I’m also scared of the consequences. Both cats are more relaxed being out in the living room but there’s no way to split my apartment in 2.

 

[Danglos]

How are things now?

 

[blumarine916]

How are things now?

Not much improvement from 2 weeks ago. Looks like a standstill. No more hissing/growling but now it’s just silent staring with swishing tail causing Meimey to run into hiding.

I can see how Meffy’s silent staring can be intimidating. It’s so unpredictable. I can’t tell if she’s okay or not. She has always wagged her tail a lot, even before she falls asleep. She’d wag it back and forth, thumping it on the bed or me until she sleeps. That’s why it’s so hard for me to tell what she’s thinking.

Anyone has cats that constantly wag/swish their tail out of habit?

 

[Danglos]

Our cats are always flipping tails around and staring at each other. They are sometimes playing and other times they irritated. It’s hard as sometimes cats seem fine and other times you’ll see a cat fight or hear a growl or cry it’s just cats being unpredictable. They go from war to best buddies to avoidance to sleeping besides each other all in the same morning.

You need to play with them and tire then out, give them treats and separate when you feel they need space.

 

[blumarine916]

Our cats are always flipping tails around and staring at each other. They are sometimes playing and other times they irritated. It’s hard as sometimes cats seem fine and other times you’ll see a cat fight or hear a growl or cry it’s just cats being unpredictable. They go from war to best buddies to avoidance to sleeping besides each other all in the same morning.

You need to play with them and tire then out, give them treats and separate when you feel they need space.

They used to playfight like that and I know what it looks like. But since this stray intrusion they can’t even be in the same room. I do play with them and brush them, give them lots of cuddles and love. I wish I could do it with both of them together in the same room.

Now Meffy just can’t have Meimey in same room as her and I’m afraid further separation is only making them more distant. But i keep being told I can’t take things further until Meffy is okay with being with Meimey which she clearly ISN’T (or just refuse to!) for nearly 2 months now. I don’t understand why is she so difficult! Sometimes I almost just want to let them “fight it out”.

So my question at this point is, how long is too long? For those of you who have experience, have you had experience with attitude like Meffy who simply refuse to accept Meimey? How do I know that she is ready to accept Meimey again or if she’ll never recover back like she was before?