We are having a problem with one of our cats being aggressive towards another timid one.
Tedy, our timid one, is just getting better from a bladder blockage procedure, and we are watching them close and keeping them separated when it starts. This is NOT a new problem, but we have found out that the aggressonion against him may have added to the bladder problem in Tedy.
Tawny is the youngest, (7 years old) and the aggressive one, and we have had him almost 6 years.
Our other 2, Toby, (the alpha) and Tedy are both almost 9 and we have had them since they were kittens. (Not litter mates)
Toby has always gotten along fine with both other cats, but Tawny has been aggressive towards Tedy since day one....not all the time, but a few times everyday he raises himself up, bushes out his hair, tips his head sideways at Tedy with his ears laid back, and then almost raises himself up on his tiptoes and walks sideways at him. Tedy gets scared and runs to hide, and then is chased ,and Tawny will bite or scratch at him until Tedy gets to a safe place that Tawny can`t reach him....usually up high where Tawny is not as apt to get as.
Tawny has always gotten along with my husband, but he and I were not too crazy about each other at first. He`d show aggression towards me too....for just wanting to pet him.(First time I ever had a problem making friends with a cat, I might add!) He might allow me to pet for a minute or two and then he`d bite at or scratch at me. It never drew blood, but still hurt. I`ve learned to just leave him alone when he acts out and after a bit he`ll be "over it". We have grown to like each other over time...I just let him come to me when he wants my attention...and I quit petting when I notice his ears start to flatten. (His cue to me that he has had enough for the moment)....He NEVER does this to my husband, I might add.
My concern is his aggression towards Tedy. (Darn it, I wish Tedy would defend himself ...it would probably only take once, as he has super long claws , is much bigger, and I have no doubt that he could "take" Tawny if he wanted to ....but alas, Tedy is a lover, and not at all a fighter and he will not fight back)
I`m nervous about them being together in the same room as you never know when Tawny`s mood is going to shift and Tedy is going to get the brunt of it....and I fear that Tedy getting too stressed will cause him to have the bladder problem again.
I am sick of having to watch constantly...and shut doors to keep them away from each other when I can`t.
I will NEVER go away and leave them in the same room again....I just wonder how much of this has been going on whenever we have been gone!
If we are watching and see him begin his bullying, we will say, "Tawny....you be a good boy!".....and often that is enough and he`ll turn and slink away ....for the moment anyhow.....if he doesn't and continues in the bullying stance, he will get a squirt in the rear end from the water bottle...and that sends him scurrying away.....but we can see it every time...and he does seems to know when we are watching.
Friends have suggested that we rehome Tawny...but I`m not at all comfortable with that. It is out of the question, as I would not want to feel responsible for him hurting someone else. (He really does NOT like little kids either.)
I also fear that someone else might hurt him for his aggression...and I don`t want that either.
When we first got him I was afraid he might have a brain tumor or something....but we`ve had him for 6 years and he`s still alive, so I doubt that`s the case.
Our vet has never touched him. He has given him his shots with Larry holding him with his back to the vet.....originally the vet was going to charge us $20 for a first visit call, since he hadn't seen Tawny before....but Tawny was so awful sounding that the vet and his assistant both backed away when Larry took him out of his carrier. The vet just asked a few questions about his eating and litter habits and never charged us the $20. Thankfully Tawny has never been sick.
Tawny was already neutered when we got him...(as are our other 2)and I wonder how in the heck a vet got close enough to him to put him under to do it.
We are retired and can NOT afford a cat "shrink" to try to figure out why he is this way...we just need some ideas of how to handle the situation.
PLEASE HELP! (And sorry this is so long....but it had to be in order to give you a fairly full picture of what is happening)
Thanks so much in advance for any help anyone can give.- Linda
Tedy, our timid one, is just getting better from a bladder blockage procedure, and we are watching them close and keeping them separated when it starts. This is NOT a new problem, but we have found out that the aggressonion against him may have added to the bladder problem in Tedy.
Tawny is the youngest, (7 years old) and the aggressive one, and we have had him almost 6 years.
Our other 2, Toby, (the alpha) and Tedy are both almost 9 and we have had them since they were kittens. (Not litter mates)
Toby has always gotten along fine with both other cats, but Tawny has been aggressive towards Tedy since day one....not all the time, but a few times everyday he raises himself up, bushes out his hair, tips his head sideways at Tedy with his ears laid back, and then almost raises himself up on his tiptoes and walks sideways at him. Tedy gets scared and runs to hide, and then is chased ,and Tawny will bite or scratch at him until Tedy gets to a safe place that Tawny can`t reach him....usually up high where Tawny is not as apt to get as.
Tawny has always gotten along with my husband, but he and I were not too crazy about each other at first. He`d show aggression towards me too....for just wanting to pet him.(First time I ever had a problem making friends with a cat, I might add!) He might allow me to pet for a minute or two and then he`d bite at or scratch at me. It never drew blood, but still hurt. I`ve learned to just leave him alone when he acts out and after a bit he`ll be "over it". We have grown to like each other over time...I just let him come to me when he wants my attention...and I quit petting when I notice his ears start to flatten. (His cue to me that he has had enough for the moment)....He NEVER does this to my husband, I might add.
My concern is his aggression towards Tedy. (Darn it, I wish Tedy would defend himself ...it would probably only take once, as he has super long claws , is much bigger, and I have no doubt that he could "take" Tawny if he wanted to ....but alas, Tedy is a lover, and not at all a fighter and he will not fight back)
I`m nervous about them being together in the same room as you never know when Tawny`s mood is going to shift and Tedy is going to get the brunt of it....and I fear that Tedy getting too stressed will cause him to have the bladder problem again.
I am sick of having to watch constantly...and shut doors to keep them away from each other when I can`t.
I will NEVER go away and leave them in the same room again....I just wonder how much of this has been going on whenever we have been gone!
If we are watching and see him begin his bullying, we will say, "Tawny....you be a good boy!".....and often that is enough and he`ll turn and slink away ....for the moment anyhow.....if he doesn't and continues in the bullying stance, he will get a squirt in the rear end from the water bottle...and that sends him scurrying away.....but we can see it every time...and he does seems to know when we are watching.
Friends have suggested that we rehome Tawny...but I`m not at all comfortable with that. It is out of the question, as I would not want to feel responsible for him hurting someone else. (He really does NOT like little kids either.)
I also fear that someone else might hurt him for his aggression...and I don`t want that either.
When we first got him I was afraid he might have a brain tumor or something....but we`ve had him for 6 years and he`s still alive, so I doubt that`s the case.
Our vet has never touched him. He has given him his shots with Larry holding him with his back to the vet.....originally the vet was going to charge us $20 for a first visit call, since he hadn't seen Tawny before....but Tawny was so awful sounding that the vet and his assistant both backed away when Larry took him out of his carrier. The vet just asked a few questions about his eating and litter habits and never charged us the $20. Thankfully Tawny has never been sick.
Tawny was already neutered when we got him...(as are our other 2)and I wonder how in the heck a vet got close enough to him to put him under to do it.
We are retired and can NOT afford a cat "shrink" to try to figure out why he is this way...we just need some ideas of how to handle the situation.
PLEASE HELP! (And sorry this is so long....but it had to be in order to give you a fairly full picture of what is happening)
Thanks so much in advance for any help anyone can give.- Linda