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- Apr 16, 2014
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I hope this is the right topic area for this post -- I am seeking some advice on how to best "sell" the idea of adopting a pair of kittens to my partner who I live with, who stubbornly refuses to listen to reason this.
This is made a bit more complicated in that, going against my better judgement, we recently adopted and ended up having to rehome an adult male cat after a less than a month because the cat had some rather serious behavior problems (play aggression) that, while I was coping, my partner couldn't deal with. (I've chronicled a bit of this in a post on the behavior forum for anyone who is interested in the extra background.)
I'm still pretty shaken up and upset about having to rehome a cat -- but ultimately it was the best decision for everyone involved. My partner and I are going to take some time to ourselves before looking to adopt again, and maybe foster a sick cat or two from the shelter in the meantime, but I've lived with cats for most of my life and can't really imagine not eventually having my own cats in my life.
My own personal philosophy, which has been reinforced from this bad experience with a single adult cat, is that cats are best when they have a friend. If I lived by myself and didn't have to take his opinion into consideration, I would have adopted a pair of 3-5 month old kittens already or an older bonded pair.
My boyfriend -- who isn't a cat person but is okay with dogs -- absolutely REFUSES to even consider adopting two kittens.
I've tried the usual angles -- that a pair of cats will keep each other company while we are away at work, it will minimize other behavior problems, and when we are sleeping, they can play with each other and not wake us up. I've sent him articles and resources, but he thinks everything is written with a "crazy cat lady bias" and dismisses them out of hand.
Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? How can I convince him that a pair of cats, rather than a single cat (which didn't work out for us and I don't think I could handle again), is the way to go?
This is made a bit more complicated in that, going against my better judgement, we recently adopted and ended up having to rehome an adult male cat after a less than a month because the cat had some rather serious behavior problems (play aggression) that, while I was coping, my partner couldn't deal with. (I've chronicled a bit of this in a post on the behavior forum for anyone who is interested in the extra background.)
I'm still pretty shaken up and upset about having to rehome a cat -- but ultimately it was the best decision for everyone involved. My partner and I are going to take some time to ourselves before looking to adopt again, and maybe foster a sick cat or two from the shelter in the meantime, but I've lived with cats for most of my life and can't really imagine not eventually having my own cats in my life.
My own personal philosophy, which has been reinforced from this bad experience with a single adult cat, is that cats are best when they have a friend. If I lived by myself and didn't have to take his opinion into consideration, I would have adopted a pair of 3-5 month old kittens already or an older bonded pair.
My boyfriend -- who isn't a cat person but is okay with dogs -- absolutely REFUSES to even consider adopting two kittens.
I've tried the usual angles -- that a pair of cats will keep each other company while we are away at work, it will minimize other behavior problems, and when we are sleeping, they can play with each other and not wake us up. I've sent him articles and resources, but he thinks everything is written with a "crazy cat lady bias" and dismisses them out of hand.
Has anyone dealt with a similar situation? How can I convince him that a pair of cats, rather than a single cat (which didn't work out for us and I don't think I could handle again), is the way to go?