Adding Kitten To Household. Help!!!

lisa1706

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Hi. Yesterday after considering this for over a month I adopted a male kitten who had been a found abandoned in the cold. He is 10 months old. I made a 5-hour road trip to go pick him up. I wasn't looking for a kitten but I fell in love with Gus. I have a four year old female cat who is also a rescue who I adopted two years ago. She was dropped off at a shelter while pregnant. She is very sweet and non-aggressive but she can be a little skittish until she gets to know new people. The new kitten on the other hand does not appear to be afraid of anything and is very friendly and outgoing, and is a lap cat. Desiree is more aloof but will accept bellly rubs. I heard she was not treated well at her prior home whatever that means. I know you are supposed to separate them and do a slow introduction. Well I didn't do that. I was oraying Desiree would be happy for a freind as I work all day. Big mistake. I have had a great deal of anxiety about this adoption from the start. I'm still grieving the loss of my 19 year old and 14 year old kitties about three years ago. Also going through a very stressful time in my life and I'm just not able to think clearly. The problem is I live in a one-bedroom Loft which is basically a townhouse with no doors. The only space I can separate new kitty in is a small walk-in closet. Resident kitties litter box is in the bathroom. The other thing I thought about doing was place a baby gate in front of the Spiral Staircase to keep new Kitty out of Resident kitties bedroom where we sleep but this also blocks off resident kitties window area and couch area where her towers are downstairs. Her and I normally sit down there and bird watch, there is a duck pond out back. I'm thinking about putting new kitty in the closet with a litter box and food for a couple of days. It sounds cruel but I don't know what else to do. I would feel awful if I take this new kitty back. He weighed less than a pound when they found him in the freezing cold. He is the sweetest Kitty I ever met. But I would feel even worse if my resident Kitty was not happy. I feel horrible for having caused her any stress at all. She is a loving and kind cat and deserves every comfort. She looked at me as if I betrayed her. My mom took new kitty to her home last night to give me and Resident Kitty a break as I was in tears. I know maybe I'm making too big of a deal about this because it is a very new situation but you have to understand Im going through a really stressful time in my life. Im afraid Ive added even more and I dont know what to do. Please help us.
 

ArtNJ

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You haven't even said what is happening, other than that it was a mistake to just put them together. Maybe it was, but millions of people do just that, and it does usually work out OK in the end. Even some of us here have done that. A formal introduction process is the best strategy, especially when bringing home a non-kitten, but no process is hardly uncommon or something that can't be fixed. We need to know exactly how the cats have been interacting/behaving to opine.

Take a deep breath, I'm sure its nothing that can't be fixed. Some difficulties and tension are 100% normal. In the highly unlikely event that things are unusually bad, and with you being in the living situation your in, we'll let you know that you might be better off returning the new cat and adopting a kitten (often easier, especially if you have to put them together immediately).
 
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lisa1706

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Im sorry. I had some techical trouble. The adoptee is 10 weeks old, not 10 months. I have corrected my post. Resident kitty growled and sat on the stairs for about an hour and then ran upstairs and hid under the bed which to me says she is afraid. She would not come downstairs for dinner or treats. I tried to go upstairs to comfort resident kitty but new kitty follows me, which further invades resident kitty's safe zone. I took resident kitty's food upstairs while my mom held new kitty downstairs. She also has a litter box up there. So...resident kitty is hiding under the bed while new kitty has free reign. New kitty even went under the bed until I pulled him out. Resident kitty hissed and growled. New kitty completely ignores resident kitty's growling. Resident will not interact at all. I tried keeping new kitty in closet for about 10 mins but resident still refused to come downstairs. I tried to carry her and she bolted from my arms and ran under bed.
 
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lisa1706

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The new kitty is a 10 WEEK old kitten. I have corrected my post. I thought resident kitty would be more accepting of a kitten since she has had a litter of her own.
 
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ArtNJ

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Ok, so it will likely be fine in a few days to a week. Stop forcing it though. Don't pull either cat out from under a bed, or pick them up if they are nervous. Let them be nervous. Let them hide. A little hissing and growling is just communicating that they are nervous -- totally normal and fine. You can coax with treats or with toys, you can sit down near where the kitten is hiding, but you don't want to force it. Its totally ok if they go at their own pace.

I'm not promising that everything will be easy after a week of course. It may or may not be. Some continuing difficulties are possible, but they will most likely be different ones. For example, when the cats get used to each other, and the kitten starts to want to play by jumping on the big cat, that can cause issues sometimes. For now, just relax. There are lots of super smart cat people on this site that just put a new kitten in the mix without a formal introduction process. Difficulties are common, but they normally work themselves out within days to a week or so.

Just for the future, in an ideal world, even if you don't do a formal introduction, it is preferable to set the kitten up in a home base for a day or two, just to maybe help them get comfortable faster and so they don't end up hiding somewhere bad like behind an appliance, but even that is normally not a big deal.
 
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lisa1706

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You haven't even said what is happening, other than that it was a mistake to just put them with you being in the living situation your in, we'll let you know that you might be better off returning the new cat and adopting a kitten (often easier, especially if you have to put them together immediately).
Ok, so it will likely be fine in a few days to a week. Stop forcing it though. Don't pull either cat out from under a bed, or pick them up if they are nervous. Let them be nervous. Let them hide. A little hissing and growling is just communicating that they are nervous -- totally normal and fine. You can coax with treats or with toys, you can sit down near where the kitten is hiding, but you don't want to force it. Its totally ok if they go at their own pace.

I'm not promising that everything will be easy after a week of course. It may or may not be. Some continuing difficulties are possible, but they will most likely be different ones. For example, when the cats get used to each other, and the kitten starts to want to play by jumping on the big cat, that can cause issues sometimes. For now, just relax. There are lots of super smart cat people on this site that just put a new kitten in the mix without a formal introduction process. Difficulties are common, but they normally work themselves out within days to a week or so.

Just for the future, in an ideal world, even if you don't do a formal introduction, it is preferable to set the kitten up in a home base for a day or two, just to maybe help them get comfortable faster and so they don't end up hiding somewhere bad like behind an appliance, but even that is normally not a big deal.
Ok, so it will likely be fine in a few days to a week. Stop forcing it though. Don't pull either cat out from under a bed, or pick them up if they are nervous. Let them be nervous. Let them hide. A little hissing and growling is just communicating that they are nervous -- totally normal and fine. You can coax with treats or with toys, you can sit down near where the kitten is hiding, but you don't want to force it. Its totally ok if they go at their own pace.

I'm not promising that everything will be easy after a week of course. It may or may not be. Some continuing difficulties are possible, but they will most likely be different ones. For example, when the cats get used to each other, and the kitten starts to want to play by jumping on the big cat, that can cause issues sometimes. For now, just relax. There are lots of super smart cat people on this site that just put a new kitten in the mix without a formal introduction process. Difficulties are common, but they normally work themselves out within days to a
 
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lisa1706

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Thank u. So u think I should bring baby home and let them carry on and work it out? And Not worry about blocking off stairs with gate or put baby in closet? I will be at work tomorrow but can have my mom come supervise if needed. Baby is still at my mom's resting comfortably. Im shocked resident is afraid of a kitten. Maybe its just nervousness like u said. Baby is not nervous at all. He looked at her and passed her by. I appreciate ur help.
 

ArtNJ

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You should definitely bring the kitten home, as it is perfectly normal for an older resident cat to be a little nervous. They don't attack kittens though, and get over it in time. Its not really being nervous about the specific tiny kitten, its being nervous that there is another cat, any cat, in the house. Kittens are easier, but they don't always entirely avoid this sort of nervousness. I know its weird! But normal.

If it is not terribly inconvenient, it is nice to give them some adjustment time separate even if you don't do some lengthy formal introduction process. So maybe the gates, yes. And it is traditional to set the kitten up in a home base for a day or two. However, if its a tiny closet, I'd probably skip that step. A typical size bathroom is ok, but a typical closet I feel might be too small.
 

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Is the kitten still at your Mom's place? If so, that means you can start the cat introductions all over when you bring him back to your place.

Just until you get the introduction period over with, would you be able to put your resident cat's litter box somewhere other than the bathroom? Then you could put the new kitten in the bathroom, along with his own litter box, food, water, and toys.

That way he'd be separate from your resident cat, and she wouldn't be able to see him, but she could smell and hear him, which could help her get used to his presence.

Eventually you could try putting the kitten in a cat carrier, and letting your resident cat "meet" him that way. But then return him to the bathroom, until you feel they get along ok.

You've probably read these, but I'll post all the TCS links on cat introductions, in case you might have missed one.

Good luck.

How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide | TheCatSite
Introducing Cats To Cats | TheCatSite
How To Introduce A Kitten To An Older Cat | TheCatSite
How To Fix An Unsuccessful Cat Introduction | TheCatSite
 
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lisa1706

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Thanks I just brought Gus back from moms and left him in carrier for about a half hour. Desiree came to the top of the stairs for about 10 mins then left and back under bed. I could put him in bathroom. Desiree has been using her second box upstairs.
 

rubysmama

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Keep an eye on Desiree and make sure she's eating, sleeping, playing, using the litter box normally. And hopefully she and Gus will be best buds soon. :catlove:
 
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lisa1706

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Keep an eye on Desiree and make sure she's eating, sleeping, playing, using the litter box normally. And hopefully she and Gus will be best buds soon. :catlove:
Well Desiree did sneak downstairs and watch Gus sleep late last night. She ate. But I could not get her to play when I went upstairs and she did not come downstairs for breakfast today. This is usually our bonding time. She is using the litter box upstairs which is not her preferred box. Its an extra I keep upstairs that she has not used in a year. I feel awful I have caused her any stress at all. I think I will give it until the end of the week or do u think more time is needed? I want to be fair to Gus but my resident cat has to come first. Desiree has been thru a lot in her life and was depressed when I adopted her. She was down to 4# as she had stopped eating at the shelter.
 

rubysmama

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Give Desiree lots of attention. Tell her you still love her, and that she is not being replaced. It's really only been 1 day, so she probably just needs more time.

Oh... just see the kitten is only 10 weeks old. Then that should work out fine. Older cats usually accept younger kittens more quickly than they would accept another adult cat.

Since he's so young, you will have to keep him separated from Desiree until you are positive she won't hurt him, as he is much too small to defend himself.

He's totally adorable, btw. And Desire is beautiful too.

Here's the How To Introduce A Kitten To An Older Cat | TheCatSite article again. There should be good tips for you in there.

Good luck. Keep us posted.
 
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lisa1706

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Hi. Happy to report they are getting along well. Running and chasing each other. Desiree still lets kitten know who's boss when he gets out of line. See pics! Thanks for the encouragement.
 

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