1.5 Year Old Female Fear Urination Problem

[Fluffhead24]

Hello,

We have two cats in the house, and they get along GREAT. Both cats got along fine with me, until one day I picked up the female by the scruff the wrong way, and she urinated AND pooped all over herself, and remained in her waste in a curled up ball frightened. We brought her to the vet and the checkup showed no signs of injury at all. Well from then on, she has been extremely frightened of me. She will run to her safe spots whenever I enter a room, she will only approach me for food (which she does when she's hungry, and she meows politely for it). If I stare at her for any length of time when she's frightened, she will urinate immediately on the spot. If i come across her in the hallway she will stop, curl up frightened, and urinate if I make any movement or eye contact. One day she came to me for wet food, I fed her and she started eating. I came back in the kitchen to check up and clean up the plates, and we made eye contact and she urinated all over. She pretty much fear urinates daily and it's getting out of hand. My gf and I don't want to relocate her. Our male cat is fine with me, he sleeps on my lap, loves everyone and everything. The female cat is 100% trusting and loves my girlfriend.

Background on the female: extremely feral as a kitten when we adopted her. she was at least 8-12 weeks with little human interaction.

We've tried CBDs for the stress/anxiety, feliway plugs (they help somewhat). We are trying to avoid prescription drugs at all costs, but the signs might be pointing to possible ptsd from the event, which has only gotten worse. She use's the two litter boxes in the house regularly, even the one in my office when I'm there.

We are at a complete loss and just want her to live the great life she deserves.

 

[Fluffhead24]

photo to show her beauty

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi! She's lovely!

Try obtaining a calming spray or two, and using that on your clothing to make yourself smell different to her.

Stop looking at her and in effect, basically ignore her which is to say, stop focusing on her. And, combined with that, good old Father Time.

On the flip side, when she's curled up in a frightened little ball, get down on the floor relatively near to her but not too near, DO NOT look at her, and talk to her in the nicest warmest kindest most compassionate voice you can possibly muster.

When doing this, sometimes try a wand type toy but keep your hands away. Other times, read charming flowery poetry to her. Then, get up and just. walk. away. - don't look at her, don't have any expectations of her AT ALL.

Also, try music, it's known to help cats to become more relaxed. There's low volume classical harp music, there's an app called Relax My Cat, and there's MusicForCats . com as sources to start you off.

It will take time, but for such a darling sweetheart of a cat, totally worth it

 

[susanm9006]

Poor girl. Can your girlfriend take care of her feeding and other pet duties?. She is still clearly so terrified, I think it is best if you don’t get too close, don’t feed her and definitely don’t make eye contact. This may not be forever but she needs time to readjust to you and to feel safe.

 

[Fluffhead24]

Problem is the unexpected run ins . For example a few nights ago I got up to get water, and she was in the kitchen. I did not know and didnt make eye contact b/c they were almost shut i just woke up. but i heard her hiss as i got close apparently and then i knew. sure enough a puddle of urine was there. would it be good to lock her in a room for a few weeks with all the essentials? or would that cause more stress with a re introduction to me?

 

[Furballsmom]

It might ease her stress and give her a break from everything, to give her her own safe room with some music now and then (it shouldn't be on 24-hours).

Then, at some point start utilizing the methods I posted above

 

[She's a witch]

There is no reason to pick the cats up by the scruff.

i also think that separating her is the best way to move forward. She is terribly stressed and I would worry that she can get UTI or something else if that continues. Any reintroduction to you should be done very, very slowly, starting with your scent.

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi!
How are things going with you and your furbaby?

 

[Fluffhead24]

Things are not improving. She will sometimes urinate herself if I just enter the room, not even looking at her. It is becoming a major problem, because she is urinating all over the house. We are thinking of resorting to some type of anti anxiety medicine, I do not want to re home her, but I feel so bad she is living under extreme stress.

At this point we don't know any type of solution besides isolating her and putting her on meds to calm down. I think she may have some serious PTSD against me

 

[Fluffhead24]

Today, we fed her wet food to calm her down in the morning. She was pretty good, hanging out and running around like herself. My girlfriend left for work, and she immediately went into fear/rock/hide mode. She was behind the curtain in the same spot for 2 hours. I decided to try and play with her and da bird wand toy. After 20 minutes of persuasion, she finally came out, all happy again, playing with the toy. After a nice hunt session, she went to her bed on the couch right besides me ( i was laying on the other couch). I got up to grab a drink and snack, and I re entered the room, she was halfway between the bed she was just relaxing in, and the curtain hiding spot. She froze there and urinated all over everything. Literally mid stride, froze, and urinated. She then pooped (which consisted of pretty fresh, undigested wet food from earlier). This is how quick things can take a turn with her.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Hi. Take a look at this article and see if there is anything in there that you haven't already tried and think might work.

14 Cat Experts Reveal: How To Get A Cat To Like Me

 

[Fluffhead24]

everything in that article except rubbing her scent all over me. we have a male cat who we adopted with her. he was non feral and he is absolutely obsessed with me. follows me everything, constantly scents me. he even makes it a point to remark me when i leave the shower. they get along great and sleep/play/groom together. but this has me thinking about the scent i have.

 

[Fluffhead24]

Hi!
How are things going with you and your furbaby?

just posted an update

 

[Furballsmom]

but this has me thinking about the scent i have.

Try obtaining a calming spray or two, and using that on your clothing to make yourself smell different to her.

This was why I suggested the calming spray. The thing of it is though, that doesn't explain why she'd be happily playing with you and then, oh...I think I might have something...

Were you sitting or squatting lower to the ground when you were playing with the wand toy with her?, and then you were lying on the couch.

I decided to try and play with her and da bird wand toy. After 20 minutes of persuasion, she finally came out, all happy again, playing with the toy. After a nice hunt session, she went to her bed on the couch right besides me ( i was laying on the other couch).

but then you stood up and left, and came back in, standing/walking and she was frightened again...

I could be wrong, but I'm getting the impression that it's when you are standing and/or walking at your full height.

What if you were to give her her own room with all her things, and some music. Whenever you enter the room do so at a crouch, spend enough time so that she plays with you, then, staying bent over or crouched down, just simply leave.

Gradually over time do this where each time you're standing a little taller, and eventually you should be able to be at your full height. It'll take some patience and there may be setbacks but perseverance will pay out in big dividends I'm thinking .