Frankie is at the rainbow bridge

[FrankieTheCat]

Hello all. I wanted to thank everyone who tried to help me with Frankie and for the well wishes and advice. Last weekend Frankie declined within a matter of hours, from Friday to Saturday she began to inhibit signs of kidney failure and heart failure even with medications. I thought about taking her to an emergency vet an hour away but decided it wasn't worth the risk. Sunday 10/9 I just knew she wasn't going to make it for Wednesday xray and update. After watching her very closely for the past month or so I just saw it in her eyes it was time. She began to refuse all foods and treats, even her favorite human treats like mayo or cheese. She began to wobble as she walked and Sunday she couldn't even move much anymore I could tell that wasn't the old Frankie anymore. I think she was hanging on for my sake. Monday morning I called the vet to help her pass, he didn't want to do it until later in the day at 4 pm which pained me because she was doing so bad. She was suffering. I didn't know what else to do but wait. When the time came I tried putting her in a little box with her favorite blanket and toys. She tried to get out so I held her in my arms as I walked to the car. As soon as I laid her in the box she began to panick and pant. I told my boyfriend I didn't think she'd make it. The vet was only 10 minutes away. I held her close and comforted her. I know that my Frankie was no longer consciously there but it was very painful and traumatic to see her this way. When we arrived at the vet my bf went in to try and rush everything so they had a room ready. I cried and cried and told Frankie it was OK if she could no longer hold on. I felt and saw her take her lasts breaths as her body began to twitch, could've been a seizure or her body simply having last minute reflexes. I held her lifeless body in my arms and I held her close telling her I was so sorry and that I love her so much. Frankie passed away on 10/10 around 4pm. I've never lost someone I loved so much. I've never lost a friend let alone a best friend and a soul mate. Frankie was my light. She saved me time and time again from the darkness. I called her my life line because she was. As I lay here holding a piece of her close to my heart, this pain, this emptiness within lingers and I fear it will never go away. I miss her so much. My life will never be the same in fact I had no plans on having a life if she was gone from mine. My other 3 younger pets and boyfriend of 4 years are the ones helping me hold on but my entire reality is in pieces and I can't grasp what has happened, I feel like I will wake up any minute from this nightmare and she will be laying next to me sleeping or she will be by the door ready to go eat breakfast like she was for the past 16.5 years. I see her when I close my eyes. I picked her up yesterday so she is home. I thought I'd feel better but I don't. There is a gaping wound in my broken heart. I think to myself I will be ok and then reality sets in that she is gone and I will never get to see her or hold her or kiss her again in this life and it's something I don't want to do but somehow I'm forced to do it anyway. I wish things couldve gone differently. I wish i couldve helped her pass in peace here at home but not vet would do that. I failed her in the end, letting her suffer and go the way she did. They say our pets create a soul contract with us before the beginning of time and they choose how when and where they would. Typical frankie, always strong and independent doing things on her own terms. My boyfriend comforts me and says frankie didnt want me to make that choice becaue it would be too hard so she chose to leave her own way. This doesnt feel real. My one constant piece of heaven that was there every day of my life for almost 17 years, since i was 17 years old is just gone in a blink of an eye and i dont know how to adapt. I know she is always with me but not being able to hold her and see her is just unfathomable pain that i am living. Rest easy my precious girl. Momma loves you and misses you and hopes to reunite with you, someday. I cant wait for that day. I no longer fear death because i know my frankie will be there, waiting for me. ‍

 

[FeebysOwner]

My heart is with yours - and Frankie's. Nothing more I can say, as you well know.

 

[catsknowme]

My heart grieves with yours. Many of us here know only too well the pain of losing your soul kitty, the kind of cat that ancient Egyptians felt were the guardians of our dreams. I am glad that you have comfort and support during these difficult days. Remember to be kind to yourself. Someone here at TCS had recommended Holy Basil for grief; I tried taking it when I lost someone near. & very dear to me and it help me calm down. I was still heartbroken, still am, but at least I was able to work without randomly crying. Frankie was so beautiful and I agree with your boyfriend that she was strong willed enough to leave this realm on her terms. She may have had it rough at the end but that awful time was brief and nothing can hurt her ever again. You gave her years and years of joy, she left being held in the arms that she loved more than anything or anyone. We are all here for you and you can reach out to any one of us, either here in the forums or via PM. Godspeed and tail winds west, Frankie....

 

[iPappy]

"My one constant piece of heaven that was there every day of my life for almost 17 years, since i was 17 years old is just gone in a blink of an eye and i dont know how to adapt"

I am so, so sorry to read this. I know you did so much for her that many would not. I know how you feel. It's like a part of our souls have been ripped away without our consent, and it hurts. The hurt is deep.
As I was told during a huge recent loss of mine, I now have a treasure in Heaven. And when I get there, I get to open that treasure box and relive all those wonderful memories with a little wonderful soul I've lost in this life, but will be there in the next and we will never be apart ever, ever again. My happiness will be fulfilled. But for now, that temporary separation hurts.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss.

 

[catloverfromwayback]

I am so sorry. Your darling Frankie passed the same way my Katie did thirteen years ago, in my lap on the way to the vet for her to be euthanised. I have felt the same about her going in her own time and way - I just wish I had been in time to make it easier for her. I totally agree that they will be waiting for us (perhaps with that “Where have you been all this time?” look).

 

[FrankieTheCat]

My heart grieves with yours. Many of us here know only too well the pain of losing your soul kitty, the kind of cat that ancient Egyptians felt were the guardians of our dreams. I am glad that you have comfort and support during these difficult days. Remember to be kind to yourself. Someone here at TCS had recommended Holy Basil for grief; I tried taking it when I lost someone near. & very dear to me and it help me calm down. I was still heartbroken, still am, but at least I was able to work without randomly crying. Frankie was so beautiful and I agree with your boyfriend that she was strong willed enough to leave this realm on her terms. She may have had it rough at the end but that awful time was brief and nothing can hurt her ever again. You gave her years and years of joy, she left being held in the arms that she loved more than anything or anyone. We are all here for you and you can reach out to any one of us, either here in the forums or via PM. Godspeed and tail winds west, Frankie....

I don't know what to say but thank you. Hearing things like this mend my heart just a bit. ‍🩹

 

[FrankieTheCat]

"My one constant piece of heaven that was there every day of my life for almost 17 years, since i was 17 years old is just gone in a blink of an eye and i dont know how to adapt"

I am so, so sorry to read this. I know you did so much for her that many would not. I know how you feel. It's like a part of our souls have been ripped away without our consent, and it hurts. The hurt is deep.
As I was told during a huge recent loss of mine, I now have a treasure in Heaven. And when I get there, I get to open that treasure box and relive all those wonderful memories with a little wonderful soul I've lost in this life, but will be there in the next and we will never be apart ever, ever again. My happiness will be fulfilled. But for now, that temporary separation hurts.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss.

‍🩹‍🩹 Thank you. I appreciate your words.

 

[FrankieTheCat]

I am so sorry. Your darling Frankie passed the same way my Katie did thirteen years ago, in my lap on the way to the vet for her to be euthanised. I have felt the same about her going in her own time and way - I just wish I had been in time to make it easier for her. I totally agree that they will be waiting for us (perhaps with that “Where have you been all this time?” look).

I'm sorry you went through that too. Thank you. I hope they do. Hopes it goes by faster for them too. ‍🩹

 

[Margot Lane]

The photo of Frankie on the right of your lovely shrine says everything…what a soul, mirroring back the intimacy you two shared. I do not think Frankie could have been loved more deeply by anyone, up to her very last breath. I am sure she felt grateful & reassured to be held in your arms.

 

[FrankieTheCat]

The photo of Frankie on the right of your lovely shrine says everything…what a soul, mirroring back the intimacy you two shared. I do not think Frankie could have been loved more deeply by anyone, up to her very last breath. I am sure she felt grateful & reassured to be held in your arms.

That is my only picture I have of her when within the year I first got her! That stare just got cuter and fuller and was always so reassuring. Thank you for helping me bring up that lovely memory.

 

[Maria Bayote]

I am very sorry for your loss. I hope and pray you find peace and comfort from all the happy memories you have shared with Frankie.

She was beautiful.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Frankie, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

Yes, Frankie's love, now translated and purified into Love, is with you still, and will walk with you down through all the days of your life. That you know, but I understand the ache for the physical presence, the soft purr in the night, the paw that pats your tears away. We do not "get over" these losses, we only get through them, and learn to live with them, but the loss is always there. Hang on, Sweet Soul. Eventually, the sweet memories will overtake the sorrowful ones, and you will feel Frankie's Love around you. It is a process, and no one can tell you how you should do it. And we are here, when you need to talk.

 

[Norachan]

She was a beautiful girl. It's obvious from reading your story and looking at the pictures that you loved her so very much. I wish every cat was lucky enough to be loved that way.

I'm sure you have a lifetime of happy memories that will be there to comfort you when your initial grief has faded a little. Focus on those, let your tears flow and remember to breathe.

It's good to have someone to love us while we live and cry for us when we are gone.

 

[di and bob]

your dear Frankie is still your lifeline, the 'essence' that is her will always parallel your own life's journey until the end of time. Love is spiritual, so eternal. She will forever be as close as your thoughts and prayers.
The special bond of love you have is unique, known only to you and her. No one else in the whole world loved her as you do, she knows this and will forever carry it in her heart. She does not want to be the cause of pain for someone she loves so much, go forward into the future and live it as you would want for her to live if you were the first to go. "Do not cry because it is over, smile because it happened".
My thoughts and prayers are with you all, take care of those left behind, they grieve also. RIP precious Frankie. You will always be remembered, you will always have secure places in loving hearts. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[FrankieTheCat]

I am very sorry for your loss. I hope and pray you find peace and comfort from all the happy memories you have shared with Frankie.

She was beautiful.

Thank you. ‍🩹

 

[FrankieTheCat]

Rest you gentle, Frankie, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

Yes, Frankie's love, now translated and purified into Love, is with you still, and will walk with you down through all the days of your life. That you know, but I understand the ache for the physical presence, the soft purr in the night, the paw that pats your tears away. We do not "get over" these losses, we only get through them, and learn to live with them, but the loss is always there. Hang on, Sweet Soul. Eventually, the sweet memories will overtake the sorrowful ones, and you will feel Frankie's Love around you. It is a process, and no one can tell you how you should do it. And we are here, when you need to talk.

I appreciate your words, thank you so much.

 

[FrankieTheCat]

your dear Frankie is still your lifeline, the 'essence' that is her will always parallel your own life's journey until the end of time. Love is spiritual, so eternal. She will forever be as close as your thoughts and prayers.
The special bond of love you have is unique, known only to you and her. No one else in the whole world loved her as you do, she knows this and will forever carry it in her heart. She does not want to be the cause of pain for someone she loves so much, go forward into the future and live it as you would want for her to live if you were the first to go. "Do not cry because it is over, smile because it happened".
My thoughts and prayers are with you all, take care of those left behind, they grieve also. RIP precious Frankie. You will always be remembered, you will always have secure places in loving hearts. May the good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

Aw Thank you for your beautiful words. They help me feel a little better. ‍🩹

 

[Mighty Orange]

I'm not very good at this due to losing 4 of my own during the past 2 years. I just want you to know that time will make the pain less, but you will never forget your love that you and Frankie shared.
Hang in there.

 

[FrankieTheCat]

I'm not very good at this due to losing 4 of my own during the past 2 years. I just want you to know that time will make the pain less, but you will never forget your love that you and Frankie shared.
Hang in there.

Thank you.

 

[Antonio65]

I'm so terribly sorry for the loss of your beautiful Frankie.
Your tribute to her was so intense that it cut my breath, I couldn't even breathe while I was reading it, my heart was hurting and tears were running down.
You surely had a very special relationship, one of those that happen once in a lifetime. I feel and understand your pain and the way you are feeling now. When my beloved Lola (profile photo) left me, I was sure I was going to die. I even hoped I would die with her. My life hasn't been the same since, and never will.
I do not have much to say apart from the fact I'm terribly sorry and that I know that you will be reunited one day, a love like this can't be broken, you two deserve to be together forever.