- Joined
- Jan 12, 2018
- Messages
- 9
- Purraise
- 13
Hi all,
Mods, apologies if I am posting in the incorrect forum - please feel free to move this to another forum.
We have a 6 year old Domestic Short Hair. We have had him since is he was 5 months old. I have always loved cats, had them all my life until I went to University but my wife was never a fan of cats so we never had one as a couple. This opinion changed when we went on holidays where we stayed in a lodging with a cat. My wife changed her opinion to the point that, three weeks later, we had adopted a rescue. He has a few issues, dysplasia of the hind limbs and half a tail (he was rescued after a car hit him) but he is the most loving cat.
However, a year or two after getting him and ever since, I have been in the middle of an awful situation between the two. I cannot stand animal cruelty, but I can only describe what is happening here as physical and mental cruelty.
90% of the time, they have a great relationship. But there is the 10% when the cat does not do what he is told and does not obey her orders, then there is a chance that she can get physically violent with him. I have begged her not to hit him, instead using positive reinforcement to reward him while doing the right thing. He will do that at times but she will then fly off the handle.
We have a smart cat but my wife simply does not get that he is an animal. He will obey a number of commands but there will always be a time when he just doesn't want to get off the counter or go to his bed when he has been in the indoor toilet. When she is impatient, she will hit hit him, kick him, pick him up and slam him forcefully into his bed, catch him by the neck (not by the back), smack him in his body. I am a gentle guy but I absolutely lose the plot when I see her being violent against him. She will also mentally abuse the cat, putting him locked in his box for several hours if he does not do what she says.
When she hits the cat hard, it will lead to an argument where I am told to get rid of the cat immediately. This breaks my heart because he is like a child to me. One morning about 6 months ago, it broke me. I woke up, packed up my cat and his belongings and drove to the nearest rescue centre. Had she not noticed I was gone, he would have been left there. With about 5 miles left in the journey, she called me and asked me to bring him home. She also promised she would never ask me to get rid of him again. She has asked me to get rid about a dozen times since, and as I write this, he was again fighting. Last night, she ordered the cat to go to his bed. He did. However, because he stood in the bed but did not sit down, she hit him across the head with an open palm hard enough to really hear it.
As I said, he has a number of issues and it is very unlikely that anyone will take him as he is will require expensive care in his later years. I just don't know what to do. Any time I try to defend the cat, I am told I am choosing the cat over her. I just don't know what to do anymore.
Mods, apologies if I am posting in the incorrect forum - please feel free to move this to another forum.
We have a 6 year old Domestic Short Hair. We have had him since is he was 5 months old. I have always loved cats, had them all my life until I went to University but my wife was never a fan of cats so we never had one as a couple. This opinion changed when we went on holidays where we stayed in a lodging with a cat. My wife changed her opinion to the point that, three weeks later, we had adopted a rescue. He has a few issues, dysplasia of the hind limbs and half a tail (he was rescued after a car hit him) but he is the most loving cat.
However, a year or two after getting him and ever since, I have been in the middle of an awful situation between the two. I cannot stand animal cruelty, but I can only describe what is happening here as physical and mental cruelty.
90% of the time, they have a great relationship. But there is the 10% when the cat does not do what he is told and does not obey her orders, then there is a chance that she can get physically violent with him. I have begged her not to hit him, instead using positive reinforcement to reward him while doing the right thing. He will do that at times but she will then fly off the handle.
We have a smart cat but my wife simply does not get that he is an animal. He will obey a number of commands but there will always be a time when he just doesn't want to get off the counter or go to his bed when he has been in the indoor toilet. When she is impatient, she will hit hit him, kick him, pick him up and slam him forcefully into his bed, catch him by the neck (not by the back), smack him in his body. I am a gentle guy but I absolutely lose the plot when I see her being violent against him. She will also mentally abuse the cat, putting him locked in his box for several hours if he does not do what she says.
When she hits the cat hard, it will lead to an argument where I am told to get rid of the cat immediately. This breaks my heart because he is like a child to me. One morning about 6 months ago, it broke me. I woke up, packed up my cat and his belongings and drove to the nearest rescue centre. Had she not noticed I was gone, he would have been left there. With about 5 miles left in the journey, she called me and asked me to bring him home. She also promised she would never ask me to get rid of him again. She has asked me to get rid about a dozen times since, and as I write this, he was again fighting. Last night, she ordered the cat to go to his bed. He did. However, because he stood in the bed but did not sit down, she hit him across the head with an open palm hard enough to really hear it.
As I said, he has a number of issues and it is very unlikely that anyone will take him as he is will require expensive care in his later years. I just don't know what to do. Any time I try to defend the cat, I am told I am choosing the cat over her. I just don't know what to do anymore.