I feel guilty for even writing this post, because others are grieving over actual loss, and I am not close to that yet. My cat is 10 years old, and other than what I'm pretty sure is arthritis (vet confirmation is coming soon), he hasn't had any serious problems yet.
But I've been reading a lot of Rainbow Bridge posts, and while this forum is full of amazing supportive people, I keep thinking about the fact that the time is going to come for my cat, Willy. He might have many years left, but there's no way of knowing, and that's part of the issue for me. I've had dogs as pets while growing up, and I've been through the process where an aggressive disease (cancer, in this case) comes out of seemingly nowhere. It's not knowing what to expect.
Willy is my best friend. Although I accept the title of "cat dad" I think of him more like a buddy and roommate. He wants to do everything I do. If I watch TV or play video games, he is on my lap. If I am reading a book or playing piano, he has to be between me and the book or piano keys.
When I get home from work or anywhere else, he follows me around for a solid 10 minutes, trilling constantly. He naps a lot as he is getting older, and the first thing he does after waking up every hour or two is come over to check in with me and see what I'm doing. I hear his distinctive trilling coming from behind me, and I know he just woke up and is coming to check in.
I've been through some difficult times while having him, including alcoholism (currently in recovery, sober and stable), so I had to cut out a major chunk of my human social circle in order to stay healthy and sober. That's part of why my cat is literally my best friend. And honestly he's been supportive without realizing it. I always thought of his well-being, so even when I was at my worst with no motivation to do anything for myself, I always made sure I was taking care of him, and that got me through some tough times. Plus, he is an endless supply of love.
Anyway, I know this is an odd post, but it's just something I can't get out of my mind lately. It's not making me enjoy my time with him any less, but I don't want to be thinking about this in the years we have left. It's making me question everything already, and second-guessing many things I am doing, wondering if I am doing what's best for him.
I don't know if anyone has dealt with anything similar... and again, I apologize to those who are grieving over an actual loss and going through something much worse than what I am describing. I didn't know where else to post these thoughts.
But I've been reading a lot of Rainbow Bridge posts, and while this forum is full of amazing supportive people, I keep thinking about the fact that the time is going to come for my cat, Willy. He might have many years left, but there's no way of knowing, and that's part of the issue for me. I've had dogs as pets while growing up, and I've been through the process where an aggressive disease (cancer, in this case) comes out of seemingly nowhere. It's not knowing what to expect.
Willy is my best friend. Although I accept the title of "cat dad" I think of him more like a buddy and roommate. He wants to do everything I do. If I watch TV or play video games, he is on my lap. If I am reading a book or playing piano, he has to be between me and the book or piano keys.
When I get home from work or anywhere else, he follows me around for a solid 10 minutes, trilling constantly. He naps a lot as he is getting older, and the first thing he does after waking up every hour or two is come over to check in with me and see what I'm doing. I hear his distinctive trilling coming from behind me, and I know he just woke up and is coming to check in.
I've been through some difficult times while having him, including alcoholism (currently in recovery, sober and stable), so I had to cut out a major chunk of my human social circle in order to stay healthy and sober. That's part of why my cat is literally my best friend. And honestly he's been supportive without realizing it. I always thought of his well-being, so even when I was at my worst with no motivation to do anything for myself, I always made sure I was taking care of him, and that got me through some tough times. Plus, he is an endless supply of love.
Anyway, I know this is an odd post, but it's just something I can't get out of my mind lately. It's not making me enjoy my time with him any less, but I don't want to be thinking about this in the years we have left. It's making me question everything already, and second-guessing many things I am doing, wondering if I am doing what's best for him.
I don't know if anyone has dealt with anything similar... and again, I apologize to those who are grieving over an actual loss and going through something much worse than what I am describing. I didn't know where else to post these thoughts.