When You Don't Know Their History..

[dragoriana]

I wasn't sure where to put this. Obv Violet is no longer a stray, but we adopted her at 2yrs 4 weeks old. The first adult we've adopted. She was transferred from one shelter to our local for 4 weeks, so we don't know if she was in a bad condition before coming down here (I could never imagine that long fur being matted and horrific). I suppose what I want to know is, if you have zero information of their life before being taken in, how do you deal with trust or behavioral issues? We love her to pieces, and I feel like after 5 months she has settled in. She has a few quirks which I feel are to do with her life before the shelter/s. (as a side note when we saw her they said she didn't come out of her cage or interact with anyone that entire month..she was overlooked for her quietness!) I don't think it is a huge enough worry to put into the behavioral section of the forum..idk. Do any of you ever wonder/worry that their personality had been shaped by past abuse/mistreatment and wish you could know what their life was before? We love Violet as she is, but sometimes I feel like if I knew what she had experienced that we could 100% get why she is the way that she is and make her know she has nothing to worry about. To know how to react to or treat certain personality traits in the way that is best for her, not us. Sorry this sounds all rambly. It just makes me sad to think she may have been dumped or hurt or lost and left to fend for herself.

 

[theyremine]

I adopted my Stellar from a rescue over 8 years ago. She was a year and a half old tuxie and had been at that shelter more than 6 months (no kill). She had been rescued from a kill shelter where she, her Siamese mate, and a kitten had been left. I was led to believe she was a lap cat, she wasn't. I didn't see her for the first 3 months I had her, but she was eating and using the litter box. Once she came out of hiding, she still shied away from any petting. My vet guessed that she had been abused (broken tail and a couple of detached ribs). I was advised to just be patient. About 6 years ago, she started jumping into my lap and now is always by my side or in my lap and enjoys some petting. I, too, wonder about her early life, but although it took years, I know she trusts me and is happy in her home without fear or pain.

 

[trudy1]

Out of our 7 rescues we have Spunky, the skizoid gray/white tabby. We found him on a dirt road with only two houses on that mile. He was just walking. We stopped, wrapped him in a towel and brought him home. He was maybe 3-4 months. We travel that area very frequently and had never seen him. That was three years ago. He cry’s after my wife to sit and hold him but if a car pulls into the drive or the front door opens....he’s gone. We have had people come to feed while we were gone up to 10 days and they never saw him. Sweet as can be but scared of everything. Like you I wonder what happened to him in those few months of kittenhood.
No he is not getting better but we just accept him as he is.

 

[weebeasties]

Most of ours joined our family by just showing up one day. We have spent a lot if time over the years speculating about their prior lives. You can't really stop yourself, but it probably does no good. Just watching each cat and getting to know what you need to do for them to feel safe and loved is the best we can hope for I think.
That being said, when we brought in Jasmine as a pregnant feral, she gave us three beautiful kittens that we kept as well. We have known and loved them every minute of their lives. We know everything they have experienced in the last 8 years. And STILL we look at them and say "why does Spike do that?" or "why does Sunshine like that so much?" etc. So it goes to show that living in a happy loving house doesn't mean you won't have an odd quirk or behavior now and then. Sometimes it's just an unexplained personality thing.

 

[Furballsmom]

We adopted our Maine coon from a shelter, they figured she was about 10 but that was all the info we received. It became very apparent that someone had used the broom to shoo her away, she surprised the heck out of me by flying out of the kitchen the first time I got my broom out, and that happened every time she caught sight of it.
The Big Guy got here and freaked out about plastic bags and the sound of sizzling food in the frypan. Over time, he became less and less concerned and now doesn't care. We decided his former mama didn't cook so he was completely unfamiliar with either of those sounds

 

[dragoriana]

We adopted our Maine coon from a shelter, they figured she was about 10 but that was all the info we received. It became very apparent that someone had used the broom to shoo her away, she surprised the heck out of me by flying out of the kitchen the first time I got my broom out, and that happened every time she caught sight of it.
The Big Guy got here and freaked out about plastic bags and the sound of sizzling food in the frypan. Over time, he became less and less concerned and now doesn't care. We decided his former mama didn't cook so he was completely unfamiliar with either of those sounds

Charlie was like that too! Even though we adopted him at 16 weeks, they said he already had an owner. He was jumpy as hell at plastic bags, tin foil, sudden movements etc. Literally took years for him to get over it.

 

[Furballsmom]

Literally took years for him to get over it

You're absolutely right, it makes our hearts hurt a bit, but at least now they get to spend their lives with those of us who know how to love them