Weird Behaviour From 12 Year Old Siamese After Introducing New Kitten

[Vanhorne86]

My male Siamese cat (Frankie) is 12 years old and was a rescue when he was 3 days old (he's never had a mother or father cat) and has always been very very attached to me. He's lived perfectly fine and happily with various other cats and kittens while growing up and behaved normally. 4 years ago after he'd lived alone for a few years, I got a 13 week old male Siamese kitten (Bane) and he took to him pretty much instantly, he was cross with me for about a week but they cuddled up together and Frankie would groom him and was generally very happy and normally behaved. Bane sadly died of cancer 1 month ago and Frankie's behaviour changed, he started pacing a lot, being very noisy and very clingy towards me again. I figured he was lonely so 2 weeks ago I got another 13 week old kitten (Vinny) and Frankie's behaviour has changed again.

Vinny is very playful and sweet and was bugging Frankie a bit at first but Frankie is non violent and would just run away when Vinny playfully swatted or nipped him. Vinny has calmed down a bit now and Frankie is happy to sleep next to Vinny, he even tried to groom him a couple of times but Vinny isn't keen and started trying to play fight which Frankie doesn't like. Now, 2 weeks later, Frankie is being really off with me and Vinny too, he almost seems dead behind the eyes. He won't purr at all unless he's outside in the garden, he's stiff to touch and shows no interest in being stroked, he hardly even looks me in the eye. He still constantly sits in the main room though with Vinny snuggling into him but won't actually acknowledge that he's there.

I have a Feliway Friends diffuser plugged in which seemed to initially calm the situation but Frankie honestly seems like he's totally checked out of life. I'm constantly trying to give him extra attention but it's like he hates me. Can anyone offer any advice? He's met and been fine with so many other cats and kittens in his life, what on earth is going on?

 

[KarenKat]

A vet visit might be in order. At Frankie’s age, it’s often good to get a senior wellness check and some blood work to make sure there are no underlying medical issues. Is he eating, drinking and using the litter box normally?

He’s also probably still grieving Bane, and also dealing with Vinny. As a younger cat he may have been more interested in making friends, now he’s older and maybe less patient. If the vet clears him of any underlying illness, maybe give him some time. I hope he’s back t his old self soon!

 

[Vanhorne86]

A vet visit might be in order. At Frankie’s age, it’s often good to get a senior wellness check and some blood work to make sure there are no underlying medical issues. Is he eating, drinking and using the litter box normally?

He’s also probably still grieving Bane, and also dealing with Vinny. As a younger cat he may have been more interested in making friends, now he’s older and maybe less patient. If the vet clears him of any underlying illness, maybe give him some time. I hope he’s back t his old self soon!

I took him for bloods and a scan about a week after Bane died and everything was healthy. It's so odd, when I hang out with him in the garden, he's totally normal, purry and friendly but the second he goes back inside the house; he's weird and moody again. The kitten isn't allowed in the garden EY so I guess it's a break from him out here but he just won't even acknowledge the kitten's presence.

 

[KarenKat]

Yeah, sounds like he's grumpy about the new kitty. Hopefully he will adjust over time.

Have you tried playing with them together, doing group feedings or treats? That helps us.

 

[ArtNJ]

Stress from the new kitty could definitely cause all these symptoms. However, it is odd that he will let the new kitty basically cuddle up to him. It would be far more typical to get up and leave the room. Also, the sequence of events you described seemed to indicate progress -- you did mention the normal leaving the scene was going on earlier. Still, if it was medical, probably wouldn't be old self in the garden -- that is a pretty strong tell.

Bottom line - Karen is probably right that its new kitten stress, but it doesn't 100% fit the classic profile so I'm not totally sure.

 

[Vanhorne86]

Stress from the new kitty could definitely cause all these symptoms. However, it is odd that he will let the new kitty basically cuddle up to him. It would be far more typical to get up and leave the room. Also, the sequence of events you described seemed to indicate progress -- you did mention the normal leaving the scene was going on earlier. Still, if it was medical, probably wouldn't be old self in the garden -- that is a pretty strong tell.

Bottom line - Karen is probably right that its new kitten stress, but it doesn't 100% fit the classic profile so I'm not totally sure.

I'm worried because my fiancé says we'll have to take the kitten back if Frankie doesn't start behaving like his old self which would absolutely kill me as I've really bonded with him. He's saying it's like having a stranger in the house with the way Frankie is behaving towards us. I'm wondering if I should take the Feliway Friends diffuser out and replace it with the regular Feliway, although I'm not sure what the difference is between them? I'm at my wits end here, Frankie has always been an emotional cat (he starting pulling his fur out and going on hunger strike when I had to leave for a few months about 6 years ago) but this is just something else. I'm wondering if I should contact a cat behaviourist, or should I leave it longer?

 

[ArtNJ]

Oh geez, we hear of spouses/significant others being frankly jerky all the time, but this one is kind of tradgi-comical since a pretty high % of cats are aloof for all their lives.

Anyway, two weeks isn't a lot of time. Breathe deeply. Maybe order a calming collar, give it some more time & keep us posted. I think the cat will be fine. The boyfriend...well keep an eye on him too

 

[Vanhorne86]

Thanks for all the replies on this, I'm hoping that time will be the answer. My fiancé has mental health issues and gets impatient fast and Frankie's behaviour is making him feel really down and the kitten has bonded hard to me rather than him too which isn't helping the situation. I'll keep the board posted on any outcomes!

 

[Vanhorne86]

Yeah, sounds like he's grumpy about the new kitty. Hopefully he will adjust over time.

Have you tried playing with them together, doing group feedings or treats? That helps us.

They eat together with no issue, I can't play with them at the same time because of Vinny's insane energy haha, Frankie hasn't got a chance to bat the toy before Vinny has run away with it!

 

[Vanhorne86]

I thought I'd bump this thread with an update, in case it's helpful to anyone else. Sooo, after many weeks of the same issues, Frankie started to come round! I've had 2 Feliway's plugged in full time and started moving Vinny away from Frankie when he started bothering him and shutting him out of the room for a timeout. He seemed to get the picture and the pouncing and biting slowed down and as Vinny has gotten bigger, Frankie seems happier to defend himself (maybe he didn't want to before as Vinny was super tiny and easier to hurt) and after 1.5 months of Vinny being here, I'm very pleased to announce that they have made friends, they wash each other, play and sleep in a pile! There's still a bit of roughhousing but it's mutual rather than Frankie feeling harassed all the time. I've attached a lovely picture of them that I took yesterday!

 

[Furballsmom]

Oh my goodness what a wonderful update!! And just LOOK at those ears lol!
...made my whole day

 

[Vanhorne86]

Oh my goodness what a wonderful update!! And just LOOK at those ears lol!
...made my whole day

Ah thanks, I'm so so relieved and happy!

 

[susanm9006]

I do think you are correct about Frankie giving Vinny some leeway because of his age. That is pretty common behavior with adult cats and kittens, sort of a built in instinct not to hurt them. It’s good for both of them though when the older can apply some discipline and the youngster can become more respectful. Looks like you now have two best buddies.

 

[danteshuman]

I'm glad they are finally getting along! Also I think of adorable bat ears when I see your picture (in a good way!) I love Frankie' s coloring!

 

[Vanhorne86]

I do think you are correct about Frankie giving Vinny some leeway because of his age. That is pretty common behavior with adult cats and kittens, sort of a built in instinct not to hurt them. It’s good for both of them though when the older can apply some discipline and the youngster can become more respectful. Looks like you now have two best buddies.

Definitely, it seemed to change the dynamic a lot as soon as Frankie felt comfortable giving out a bit of discipline.

 

[Vanhorne86]

I'm glad they are finally getting along! Also I think of adorable bat ears when I see your picture (in a good way!) I love Frankie' s coloring!

Aha yes, his ears have always been so cute! This is a picture of him from when he was about 2 months old before his ears popped up, he looked like a Gremlin for ages!