- Joined
- Nov 29, 2012
- Messages
- 107
- Purraise
- 53
Hi all! I'm new here, but so grateful to find this forum with other cat lovers.
I have been unemployed for almost a year and have suffered setback after setback and heartbreak after heartbreak this entire year. I have sunk into a serious depression and don't know how to find my way out. My life is in shambles, I have no money, but the one thing that kept me positive were my 2 beloved cats of 11 years. Yesterday my worst nightmare came true, I had to put my sweet cat, Princess, to sleep. She had been to the vet only a month ago and it was commented on how healthy she was for her age--like a kitten. I imagined we had lots and lots of time leftpredictions for contact together on this earth. I wanted to prolong her life as much as possible, so I stocked up on cat supplements (The Missing Link-high in fiber and Cosequin-for joints). She began vomiting after ingesting The Missing Link, but I thought she just had a sensitive stomach and needed time to adjust, so I continued to supplement. Admittedly, I ignored the dosage recommendation on the bag and I now realize I was giving them FAR too much. This is the only change that has been made and I can't help but wonder if my intentions to keep her alive many more years backfired on me.
Up until Tuesday afternoon, Princess was her happy healthy sweet chatty self, until she started vomiting (not particularly unusual for her). This time was different, however, she meowed loudly as if she were in pain, and became extremely withdrawn and lethargic. The vomiting continued the entire day, and I knew something was wrong when she would not eat her dinner. She clearly was ill and hid under the bed and would cry loudly after vomiting (which was undigested food to start, but later turned into clear fluids/foam). When night rolled around, I phoned an emergency clinic that advised I take her in immediately. Since I don't have an income, nor a car (dependent on my parents for rides, that were very calloused about her illness and didn't want me spending the money on her vet visit), I decided to wait it out until the following morning, hoping her condition would improve on its own. I became concerned that she would get dehydrated, so I wrapped her in a towel and forced water down her throat. She was foaming at the mouth, and I knew she wasn't well. She spent the entire night hunched in a forward leaning position and could barely muster the strength to move or cry. Again, she refused her breakfast and any liquids. I hate myself for not bringing her to the vet until 12 PM the next day. She was held at the vets the entire day, hooked up to an IV. The vet called 5 hours later to tell me her liver enzymes were off the charts (suggesting fatty liver possibly from lack of food), her white blood cells were low, had impacted feces, and other concerning laboratory results. She was not responsive to the IV fluids, and the vet recommended I have her transported for an ultra sound and overnight admittance (he was concerned there was a blockage, tumor, or she had a serious disease). The bill had already risen to $700, and I knew I wouldn't be able to afford the necessary treatments. Her condition was rapidly deteriorating and her body was becoming toxic/her temperature was dropping. I knew she was on her way out, so we quickly returned to her side in order to say our goodbyes. It was agonizing to see her dying, she was so ill and her body so limp and lifeless. I held her face in my hands before she took her last breath.
It hadn't occurred to me at the time, but I have this overwhelming sense of guilt that I caused the situation by giving her too much of the high fiber supplement, which probably made her constipated (resulting in the vomiting, resulting in the dehydration, resulting in the loss of appetite, resulting in the fatty liver, resulting in the inability to defecate, resulting in the toxic shock). If it was simply an issue of constipation, she could've have been easily saved with an enema and force feeding. Or, possibly the IV would have been sufficient had I brought her in sooner. I know I shouldn't beat myself up, but I can't help but blame myself. I am so sorry to Princess for what she had to go through, especially if it was avoidable and due to my error. I don't want to hear that it was her time and not my fault, I really need to know what was wrong with her in order to move on, even if it was because of my mistake. I need to know what caused this because it doesn't make sense a healthy cat would deteriorate to death in a day in a half. I have another cat that I have been supplementing and I'm horrified I might cause the same situation with him. I also wonder if the vet did everything he could have. Why did it take over 5 hours to call me back about the results? And, when the vet saw she was NOT getting better from the IVs, why didn't he try anything else? He kept saying, I might try this or that (pain medication, antibiotics, force feeding her, etc.), but did NOTHING else. Despite her lying in anguish ALL DAY, he didn't actually give her pain medication until she was about to pass. I am just so upset that I feel like things could have gone differently. Your thoughts please, anyone in a similar situation?
Thank you so much for the support during this terrible time.
I have been unemployed for almost a year and have suffered setback after setback and heartbreak after heartbreak this entire year. I have sunk into a serious depression and don't know how to find my way out. My life is in shambles, I have no money, but the one thing that kept me positive were my 2 beloved cats of 11 years. Yesterday my worst nightmare came true, I had to put my sweet cat, Princess, to sleep. She had been to the vet only a month ago and it was commented on how healthy she was for her age--like a kitten. I imagined we had lots and lots of time leftpredictions for contact together on this earth. I wanted to prolong her life as much as possible, so I stocked up on cat supplements (The Missing Link-high in fiber and Cosequin-for joints). She began vomiting after ingesting The Missing Link, but I thought she just had a sensitive stomach and needed time to adjust, so I continued to supplement. Admittedly, I ignored the dosage recommendation on the bag and I now realize I was giving them FAR too much. This is the only change that has been made and I can't help but wonder if my intentions to keep her alive many more years backfired on me.
Up until Tuesday afternoon, Princess was her happy healthy sweet chatty self, until she started vomiting (not particularly unusual for her). This time was different, however, she meowed loudly as if she were in pain, and became extremely withdrawn and lethargic. The vomiting continued the entire day, and I knew something was wrong when she would not eat her dinner. She clearly was ill and hid under the bed and would cry loudly after vomiting (which was undigested food to start, but later turned into clear fluids/foam). When night rolled around, I phoned an emergency clinic that advised I take her in immediately. Since I don't have an income, nor a car (dependent on my parents for rides, that were very calloused about her illness and didn't want me spending the money on her vet visit), I decided to wait it out until the following morning, hoping her condition would improve on its own. I became concerned that she would get dehydrated, so I wrapped her in a towel and forced water down her throat. She was foaming at the mouth, and I knew she wasn't well. She spent the entire night hunched in a forward leaning position and could barely muster the strength to move or cry. Again, she refused her breakfast and any liquids. I hate myself for not bringing her to the vet until 12 PM the next day. She was held at the vets the entire day, hooked up to an IV. The vet called 5 hours later to tell me her liver enzymes were off the charts (suggesting fatty liver possibly from lack of food), her white blood cells were low, had impacted feces, and other concerning laboratory results. She was not responsive to the IV fluids, and the vet recommended I have her transported for an ultra sound and overnight admittance (he was concerned there was a blockage, tumor, or she had a serious disease). The bill had already risen to $700, and I knew I wouldn't be able to afford the necessary treatments. Her condition was rapidly deteriorating and her body was becoming toxic/her temperature was dropping. I knew she was on her way out, so we quickly returned to her side in order to say our goodbyes. It was agonizing to see her dying, she was so ill and her body so limp and lifeless. I held her face in my hands before she took her last breath.
It hadn't occurred to me at the time, but I have this overwhelming sense of guilt that I caused the situation by giving her too much of the high fiber supplement, which probably made her constipated (resulting in the vomiting, resulting in the dehydration, resulting in the loss of appetite, resulting in the fatty liver, resulting in the inability to defecate, resulting in the toxic shock). If it was simply an issue of constipation, she could've have been easily saved with an enema and force feeding. Or, possibly the IV would have been sufficient had I brought her in sooner. I know I shouldn't beat myself up, but I can't help but blame myself. I am so sorry to Princess for what she had to go through, especially if it was avoidable and due to my error. I don't want to hear that it was her time and not my fault, I really need to know what was wrong with her in order to move on, even if it was because of my mistake. I need to know what caused this because it doesn't make sense a healthy cat would deteriorate to death in a day in a half. I have another cat that I have been supplementing and I'm horrified I might cause the same situation with him. I also wonder if the vet did everything he could have. Why did it take over 5 hours to call me back about the results? And, when the vet saw she was NOT getting better from the IVs, why didn't he try anything else? He kept saying, I might try this or that (pain medication, antibiotics, force feeding her, etc.), but did NOTHING else. Despite her lying in anguish ALL DAY, he didn't actually give her pain medication until she was about to pass. I am just so upset that I feel like things could have gone differently. Your thoughts please, anyone in a similar situation?
Thank you so much for the support during this terrible time.