Just checking in to say goodnight to you and Simon, and wishing you both a peaceful night and sweet dreams.
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Tumor / SCC: Defying the Odds with Hospice Care - Living with a Terminally Ill Loved One, I share w
- Thread starter 2Cats4everLoved
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Wishing you and Simon tons of love, and peace.... continuing to follow this thread, several times a day...((hugs))
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- #304
Simon's Diary: "Our Bittersweet Journey...the long goodbye" Hour by Hour
As I said in the last entry, yesterday June 2nd was the anniversary of the day Simon stole my heart.
For the most part the day was peaceful The day started out with a little commotion. We changed cable companies and the technician was in and out of the apartment. This however was a sweet diversion for Simon, he forgot about his water obsession and was able to relax for a while. Afterwards, I needed to head out to return the old boxes and was gone for 90 minutes. I left the water on low coming out of the shower head for him, just to give him something different to observe, again, not sure what I'd find when I got home, but Simon was there sitting on the toilet watching the shower trickle. And looked at me as if to say, "mommy did you see this, this is really cool." LOL
I have a cute video I'll post later of his anniversary massage. Simon was very sweet, loving and pretty alert considering he's lost weight and the Buprenex is making him extra dopey lately. He's urinating in his box, thank goodness. But every time he hears the water running he comes looking for water. He was in a deep sleep, so I decided to take a much needed shower, and again, he came barging through the door. This time, I made sure he stayed out, I didn't want him wet, it was beautiful out but there was a chilly wind.
I managed to syringe feed him some watered down baby food, water and pedialyte. By the night, I could tell his jaw was becoming an issue.
He was in good spirits when his daddy got home at 11pm, then soon after they relaxed, I fixed his fort and I settled into bed to read, and soon after we went to sleep. He's still urinating normal.
This morning Friday, June3rd, he got up in the wee morning hours, went to the bathroom and came back to bed. Then around 6am, he was looking for water, I tried to syringe feed him and he shied away. At this point I let him be and he went back to the tub and just laid there. Since it was cold and rainy, I went back, picked him up, put him back in his fort and gave him a dose of Buprenex, we fell back to sleep until 7:30am, he was so sweet and insisted on holding my hand and keep stroking my cheek with his tail. Then when I woke up he was back in the tub staring at the faucet.
I think his jaw is an issue besides his tongue. This Cancer has eaten it's way through his mouth. And as disfiguring as it is, Simon has been so loving and sweet, I don't know how he's able to have such a normal disposition with this drastic change to his mouth. He will let me give him water near the water dish but not on the bed.
We have the home care vet's number waiting in case he expresses lots of pain. For now he's just hanging out. Chestnut on the other hand, is steering clear from him today. I'm paying close attention to her mannerisms when it comes to Simon.
As of now he's lying on the bed cuddled on a very soft winter sweater of mine.
He spent most of the morning lying in the tub I put a soft cloth under his head so he could rest easy. This is something he's always done. I think I mentioned it before. When he was first with us, and we'd have to leave the house, we used it as a playpen. We put his little litter box, blanket and a few toys in there and he'd play for hours. Until recently it's been his most favorite place to play. Especially laser light, we go in a circle at one end of the tub and he'd spin until he'd get dizzy. It was so funny, or I'd spin his balls at the far end of the tub and he'd go around in circles for hours. I only wish I had video of it all. He was very impressive with playtime. I can't even count how many shower curtains I've been through. LOL Sometimes for no reason, he'd just attack the curtain. LOL or he'd hide behind the curtain then when you'd sit on the "throne" he'd pop out and attack your thigh. LOL
It was sad not seeing him see his daddy off to work. I think my it finally hit my hubby. It used to be a big deal when he'd leave for work. Simon would have to walk around the dinning table, then walk around me and then stick his head out the door, or run out in the hall and wait on top of the stairs for my hubby to give him a nose bump.
June 2nd...
Below, Simon not happy with me. I didn't want him in the tub anymore, it was getting to cold and he was soaking wet.
Before bed I gave Simon a very long brushing. I wanted him dry before bed. I posted an older picture, earlier in this thread of Simon sleeping with his head face down in the blanket showing off his "Shoulder Heart"
When I brushed him last night, with the weight loss, the long white fur underneath has made it's way up to his sides. Now forming a "Belly Heart"
Below, Simon Full of Love... I always loved his tail...
Below, My view before I close my eyes...
This morning June 3rd, how I found Simon.
Below, Mommy, where's the water?
Below, Trying to figure it all out.
Below, Somewhat annoyed, he wanted to be in the shower with hubby this morning and we said NO! A word rarely used with Simon. LOL
Looking at Simon, it seems his tail and paws are the only features that are still Simon...
I'm not sure what today will bring.
As sad as this is, seeing him bounce back for those 3 weeks was worth every effort, emotion and sleepless nights.
I'll have more thoughts later.
Thanks again for all of the vibes, prayers and support.
Simon's Journey Continues...
As I said in the last entry, yesterday June 2nd was the anniversary of the day Simon stole my heart.
For the most part the day was peaceful The day started out with a little commotion. We changed cable companies and the technician was in and out of the apartment. This however was a sweet diversion for Simon, he forgot about his water obsession and was able to relax for a while. Afterwards, I needed to head out to return the old boxes and was gone for 90 minutes. I left the water on low coming out of the shower head for him, just to give him something different to observe, again, not sure what I'd find when I got home, but Simon was there sitting on the toilet watching the shower trickle. And looked at me as if to say, "mommy did you see this, this is really cool." LOL
I have a cute video I'll post later of his anniversary massage. Simon was very sweet, loving and pretty alert considering he's lost weight and the Buprenex is making him extra dopey lately. He's urinating in his box, thank goodness. But every time he hears the water running he comes looking for water. He was in a deep sleep, so I decided to take a much needed shower, and again, he came barging through the door. This time, I made sure he stayed out, I didn't want him wet, it was beautiful out but there was a chilly wind.
I managed to syringe feed him some watered down baby food, water and pedialyte. By the night, I could tell his jaw was becoming an issue.
He was in good spirits when his daddy got home at 11pm, then soon after they relaxed, I fixed his fort and I settled into bed to read, and soon after we went to sleep. He's still urinating normal.
This morning Friday, June3rd, he got up in the wee morning hours, went to the bathroom and came back to bed. Then around 6am, he was looking for water, I tried to syringe feed him and he shied away. At this point I let him be and he went back to the tub and just laid there. Since it was cold and rainy, I went back, picked him up, put him back in his fort and gave him a dose of Buprenex, we fell back to sleep until 7:30am, he was so sweet and insisted on holding my hand and keep stroking my cheek with his tail. Then when I woke up he was back in the tub staring at the faucet.
I think his jaw is an issue besides his tongue. This Cancer has eaten it's way through his mouth. And as disfiguring as it is, Simon has been so loving and sweet, I don't know how he's able to have such a normal disposition with this drastic change to his mouth. He will let me give him water near the water dish but not on the bed.
We have the home care vet's number waiting in case he expresses lots of pain. For now he's just hanging out. Chestnut on the other hand, is steering clear from him today. I'm paying close attention to her mannerisms when it comes to Simon.
As of now he's lying on the bed cuddled on a very soft winter sweater of mine.
He spent most of the morning lying in the tub I put a soft cloth under his head so he could rest easy. This is something he's always done. I think I mentioned it before. When he was first with us, and we'd have to leave the house, we used it as a playpen. We put his little litter box, blanket and a few toys in there and he'd play for hours. Until recently it's been his most favorite place to play. Especially laser light, we go in a circle at one end of the tub and he'd spin until he'd get dizzy. It was so funny, or I'd spin his balls at the far end of the tub and he'd go around in circles for hours. I only wish I had video of it all. He was very impressive with playtime. I can't even count how many shower curtains I've been through. LOL Sometimes for no reason, he'd just attack the curtain. LOL or he'd hide behind the curtain then when you'd sit on the "throne" he'd pop out and attack your thigh. LOL
It was sad not seeing him see his daddy off to work. I think my it finally hit my hubby. It used to be a big deal when he'd leave for work. Simon would have to walk around the dinning table, then walk around me and then stick his head out the door, or run out in the hall and wait on top of the stairs for my hubby to give him a nose bump.
June 2nd...
Below, Simon not happy with me. I didn't want him in the tub anymore, it was getting to cold and he was soaking wet.
Before bed I gave Simon a very long brushing. I wanted him dry before bed. I posted an older picture, earlier in this thread of Simon sleeping with his head face down in the blanket showing off his "Shoulder Heart"
When I brushed him last night, with the weight loss, the long white fur underneath has made it's way up to his sides. Now forming a "Belly Heart"
Below, Simon Full of Love... I always loved his tail...
Below, My view before I close my eyes...
This morning June 3rd, how I found Simon.
Below, Mommy, where's the water?
Below, Trying to figure it all out.
Below, Somewhat annoyed, he wanted to be in the shower with hubby this morning and we said NO! A word rarely used with Simon. LOL
Looking at Simon, it seems his tail and paws are the only features that are still Simon...
I'm not sure what today will bring.
As sad as this is, seeing him bounce back for those 3 weeks was worth every effort, emotion and sleepless nights.
I'll have more thoughts later.
Thanks again for all of the vibes, prayers and support.
Simon's Journey Continues...
I'm in tears as I fear the end is near
. Perhaps he can adjust to the tumor's movement yet again as he has so many times before.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours as this day ebbs into night.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours as this day ebbs into night.
Simon has captured my heart. Utterly. Hoping for tomorrow. Good night.
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- #307
He actually let me syringe him water throughout the day. It gave me a chance to look at his mouth and its disappearing right before my eyes. BUT, his tongue is back to normal size so he was able to drink and he even made it to the litter box to urinate.
I'm in tears as I fear the end is near. Perhaps he can adjust to the tumor's movement yet again as he has so many times before.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours as this day ebbs into night.
He's a trooper. Every so often he gets a gust of wind, but for the most part he's slowing down rapidly. I told him I won't cry anymore in front of him. I'll grieve later. He's down enough without me adding to it.
Simon played with an ice cube. Although this last round of water, I think it came out his nose. I can't be sure if it was a result of his head down or the tumor.
The vet said back in Feb it would happen fast. I guess this is what he meant.
I'm still thankful I made this choice or I would have never been able to bond with him again this closely, and most of all, see him really happy again, even if it was for a few months. It was all worth it.
Thank you @mrsgreenjeens for your kind words and support.
Simon, Chestnut and I thank you.
What a wonderful and intelligent kitty Simon is and what a wonderful mum and dad he has. This diary of yours is amazing as is your relationship with him. It's joyful, it's heartbreaking and it has to be read.
All my best to you 3 especially you and Simon v hugs.
All my best to you 3 especially you and Simon v hugs.
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- #309
I don't know what you're talking about I'm sure!!!@Stewball
as always, thank you for your kind words. You always manage to make me feel good. As does everyone else. I've said it before, I wouldn't have been able to make it this far without all the support and handy tips you all have offered.
Right now, Simon was looking for more water. I'm please to say, it's not coming back out of his nose. I feared that the cancer put a hole in the roof of his mouth.
He had some interest in the birds outside but for the most part today, he was weary and tired.
Here is a picture of my boy in better days.
In this picture he's slowly making his way up onto my hubby's desk which a BIG NO NO... And he KNOWS it. LOL
It was taken 2012
Below, I love the look on his face, It's one of two things...
I'm invisible and/or You know you won't scold me...
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- #311
You've always said kind things to me throughout this journey, on this thread and in PM messages. And I appreciate every word.
Oh my, I love that picture of him sitting on the desk! What a big boy! And the shoulder heart - my Oscar has a shoulder heart :heart3: except his is black.
Thinking of you and yours tonight
Thinking of you and yours tonight
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- #313
Simon's Diary: "Our Bittersweet Journey...the long goodbye" Hour by Hour
June 4th, Simon is still figuring out ways to be as normal as possible. He woke up twice during the night and made his was to the bathroom to take care of business. I heard him jump clumsily into the tub where he remained to for a while, but then made his way back to his place on the bed, first jumping right on my face with his big wet paws. I was so tired and I guess he was to, we just looked at each other and went right back to sleep.
This morning he was able to drink via syringe and he also has been sticking his tongue in the water, it seems as if a little is being consumed. I don't really know how much, but just the action of his tongue being able to reach the water has done wonders for his moral.
His back legs are weak and he occasionally stumbles, but then out of know where he gets a burst of energy and jumps or moves quickly with grace.
One observation, I purchased the store brand Pedialyte because they didn't have unflavored. Because not all was making it's way into Simon's mouth and was getting on his chest, it's turned his white fur grey from the minerals.
Below, Simon after a nice brushing and a nice drink of water. Below, Just a close up of my sweet boy.
When you say "Stretch Kitty" to Simon - he stretches out his hind legs and front...
Below, Simon doing stretch kitty.
Below, Relaxing on a Saturday morning. Listening to the birds.
Left, Sweet Simon
June 3rd, Bedtime...
As of now, Saturday morning, Simon is still fighting the good fight. He's so mellow and relaxed, I'll wait a little while to give him his Buprenex. I noticed with his dose last night, his heart raced a little, I'll give his heart a rest.
Simon's Journey continues...
June 4th, Simon is still figuring out ways to be as normal as possible. He woke up twice during the night and made his was to the bathroom to take care of business. I heard him jump clumsily into the tub where he remained to for a while, but then made his way back to his place on the bed, first jumping right on my face with his big wet paws. I was so tired and I guess he was to, we just looked at each other and went right back to sleep.
This morning he was able to drink via syringe and he also has been sticking his tongue in the water, it seems as if a little is being consumed. I don't really know how much, but just the action of his tongue being able to reach the water has done wonders for his moral.
His back legs are weak and he occasionally stumbles, but then out of know where he gets a burst of energy and jumps or moves quickly with grace.
One observation, I purchased the store brand Pedialyte because they didn't have unflavored. Because not all was making it's way into Simon's mouth and was getting on his chest, it's turned his white fur grey from the minerals.
Below, Simon after a nice brushing and a nice drink of water. Below, Just a close up of my sweet boy.
When you say "Stretch Kitty" to Simon - he stretches out his hind legs and front...
Below, Simon doing stretch kitty.
Below, Relaxing on a Saturday morning. Listening to the birds.
June 3rd, Bedtime...
As of now, Saturday morning, Simon is still fighting the good fight. He's so mellow and relaxed, I'll wait a little while to give him his Buprenex. I noticed with his dose last night, his heart raced a little, I'll give his heart a rest.
Simon's Journey continues...
Every time I open up the CatSite, I run to this thread. Each time I see a post from you, my heart misses a few beats. ... I have to run to see the update. I am wishing for the best and dreading the worst; knowing in my heart that the worst is inevitable, but somehow I am just hoping for a miracle. I want the Story of Simon and You to go on indefinitely. Alas I am fearing the worst.
You have given life into Simon. You have given US, the knowledge of Simon's life and love. You have give us a pure testimony to the power of unconditional love. Yes, LOVE; from both you and Simon.
We have come to know Simon ~~ his loving personality; him being a character; you allowing him to live in peace, comfort, joy, and love. The trials you are going through to make his last days those of dignity, and love is beyond belief.
thank you... so many hugs to give you...and Simon....(((hugs)))
Each time I read an update, I think of my guy and if I would be able to follow your path. I do not know. I admire you.
After I reading any current posts, I just want to go over to Artie and hug him and not let go. You inspire me...
You have given life into Simon. You have given US, the knowledge of Simon's life and love. You have give us a pure testimony to the power of unconditional love. Yes, LOVE; from both you and Simon.
We have come to know Simon ~~ his loving personality; him being a character; you allowing him to live in peace, comfort, joy, and love. The trials you are going through to make his last days those of dignity, and love is beyond belief.
thank you... so many hugs to give you...and Simon....(((hugs)))
Each time I read an update, I think of my guy and if I would be able to follow your path. I do not know. I admire you.
After I reading any current posts, I just want to go over to Artie and hug him and not let go. You inspire me...
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- #315
@Artiemom Your words brought tears to my eyes. I'll keep moving forward and think of creative ways to make my boy happy. As long as he lets me.
Right now, he got up from the where he was laying by the window and decided to camp out on the kitchen floor. It's getting muggy here and I had to shut the window on him because the neighbors are tarring the roof.
I don't know if Simon will live to see Sunday. He's slowed down even from this morning, but his mind is still racing and pretty focused, but you can see him getting weary. He's still so very loving and sweet.
Correction, he just jumped on the toilet to jump in the tub since hubby just came out of the shower. One of his favorite thinks was to watch and catch the drops that are falling on the tiles.
I actually just made paw prints of his front paws. I'll do back later.
I used the recipe that we used as a kid and is actually all over the internet.
3/4 cup flour
1/2 cup salt
1/2 cup water
Just knead until smooth, roll out and press... I put it on wax paper, then back it at 200 or so for 30 minutes until dry.
At this point if Simon does leave me, he will go peacefully.
Simon's Journey continues... for now.
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Just caught up reading the latest Simon updates and both of you guys are in my thoughts. YES, you've done the right thing. Simon knows just how much you and your hubby love him and he's staying here as long as he can for you. He'll let you know when he can't anymore. My heart is with you...
Simon has done what most religious leaders and politicians can't do and that is unite people. We're from all over the globe, all walks of life, religion and beliefs and we are all joined together surrounding you and Simon with our best wishes/thoughts/prayers. We all yearn for him to see one more day, a GOOD day, and cringe at the thought it won't be gifted to him. For us the loss you're going through is heart wrenching because many of us know we may be next to experience this. But you give us a path of dignity and love to follow. You won't be alone when the time comes. All of us will only be a keyboard away to lift you up and cradle you through your sorrow.
Simon continues to amaze, as do you. He does seem to have a great deal of peace today. I too rush to this thread every time I log in. I feel like I know Simon, because you have allowed us all to know him. His kitten pictures are so adorable! He is still adorable and so much more, and he is surrounded by love. No one can ask for more than that. If you don't want to have to dash out for pedialyte, or use a flavored version, this is the World Health Organization's recipe for homemade unflavored pedialyte; it makes one cup and is good for 24 hours. 1 cup water, 2 teaspoons sugar, 1/8 teaspoon salt, 1/8 teaspoon baking soda. You all are in my prayers. I read about Simon's journey with tears in my eyes, but with a grateful heart. Simon is such a gift, and so is this thread. Hugs.......
He has lost weight so gradually over the time this thread has been going that we are all used to it, but when you posted that picture of him sitting up all healthy and strong, it accentuated how much weight he has lost and how his face has changed and how tired he is. Yet he still has his spirit, and you are keeping him pain free with the meds. I have never had a cat that kept wanting to stay here so long. We are all with you in spirit, and Simon will stay with you in spirit too even when he lets go of his body.
Dear Goddess, when it comes time for me to begin the last lap of my life's journey, let me have around me people as patient and gentle as Simon does, and let me make that last long lap with the grace and nobility that Simon has.
This has been, to some extent, a life-changing journey for me. I can only guess what it has been for you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you, and bless you, and bless beautiful Simon. I continue to watch, and to hope. For a longer life and a gentle crossing for Simon, for you to be comforted...I hope.
This has been, to some extent, a life-changing journey for me. I can only guess what it has been for you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you, and bless you, and bless beautiful Simon. I continue to watch, and to hope. For a longer life and a gentle crossing for Simon, for you to be comforted...I hope.
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